bastardizedpotato - Tumblr blog

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Mfw leebzor

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Crusty

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Mood right now: fucking hate baby peanut god damn

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Maui onion

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Rip Mr. Peanut, a true hero to nutrition. Remember people, you can’t spell nutrition without nut.

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David Bowie isn’t dead he’s in Area 51

Please save him

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So god damn hot, I’d love to just SNIFF those little blue toes :)

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Bong Water 2

As the frog looks around it’s environment it thinks about its purpose in life. In an attempt to learn more about its home planet and destiny it needs to know it’s creator. The frog leaps down to the floor and walks about. Whilst walking around on the floor the creator stares it down as it comes down a large hall, he gets scared of his creation and attempts to take its life. But a god was with him that day for as soon as his foot touched him it pushed back and his creator blows into bits.

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Fuck

Jimi Hendrix before death.

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Bong Water

About thirty years ago, a small, twenty-some year old stoner with a crippling porn addiction lit up and proceeded to take the biggest rip anyone's ever seen. However, at the same time he saw a naked picture if his cousin Molly flash across his screen. He knew what time it was. Whipping out his dong and slapping it on the table, he started to do his thing. After about seven minutes, he was close and realized "oh shit. I aint got no tissues" and had to finish in his bong. Disgusted with himself, he never used that bong again. Leaving it on the shelf, after about six months, it fermented into a goopy substance and life began to form. Soon, there was a frog-like creature emerging from the goopy, cummy, fermented nastiness. As it crawled out, it began to realize it had the intellegence of ten thousand minds. Plopping off of the shelf and onto the desk, it decided on a moniker for itself.

Bong Water.

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It’s me

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My bitchass when I hear The Buck Bumble Theme Song

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Hungry for nuggets rn

I’m stuck in a basement help

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Eat ass and fuck hoes

Aristotles