bitsofstarsyrup

[bitsofstarsyrup]

Okay writing didn't work out and instantly get me one million followers so I think I'm going to just be mean now

[bitsofstarsyrup]

Just got my first like. I'm now famous and charging around 15$ for every word you read on my blog :D

[bitsofstarsyrup]

PSA: So I hired a narrator. Don't do that.

Hi! Hello, spoilers for my short story that's a WIP ("Read Once and Never Again") bc this just feels urgent?

Okay, so as a newer writer, I thought, "Hey, I should just hire a narrator to narrate my story, it would cut out a lot of the work and help me just get this story out of my head." You know, as a shortcut. But golly, did this guy go overboard.

First of all!

He has too much influence on the story. Exhibit A:

??? Not only is this really uncouth, it isn't even a good reading experience! It's unorthodox and frankly quite pushy. Now, quips like these are to be expected, seeing as narrators like to joke around and what not. It's in their nature to be like, really bad at making jokes? But it gets so, SO much worse. Exhibit B:

HOLD ON! ENHANCE! Right at the end there, he begins on about hands again! And better yet, he's mad at the reader!! Literally our only audience and this guy is yelling at them in size 11 Georgia! He also partakes in insulting Richard an excessive amount.

And then gets confused on the saying he previously said;

Which, may I add, is very unprofessional.

YOU'RE WELCOME? Directly after abusing his power in the narrative structure by planting quotation marks? Readers and writers alike, this right here is why we CANNOT trust hired narrators. They are rude, brash, uncouth, and on top of that, will expect thanks after completely releasing their DISEASE unto the document. And IT DOESN'T EVEN STOP THERE.

This particular narrator seems to take my project to be a therapists office as well as a playground.

Way, WAYY later on in the story, he says this.

Come ON man!! Take it to a publisher, or better yet, a phycologist!! And this IS concerning, don't get me wrong, but honestly? I hired him to narrate based on my vision. I don't want to feel bad for a NARRATOR. Save for The Stanley Parable. Awesome game, would recommend. Ultra Deluxe is my favorite but I also like the original demo :D

By this point, the narrator has gone so far as to tampering with my main character, Richard. At multiple points he literally has to steer the dude back onto the track I wanted the story to go down, which, in MOST if not ALL books I have read, should not be the case at all. Like in this instance,

He said it's time to go?? To my main character?? And made him feel sick (from what I've gathered?) And Richard isn't dumb, or at least THAT dumb. Or at least he has some semblance of a conscious. So sooner or later, he realizes that this pretentious parasite in his head ISN'T his own?

The LAST thing I need is this guy Trumann showing on me!! Not after I had this original idea for the first time ever with no inspiration of a guy stuck at his dead end job that hears a strange voice that drives him to pursue freedom. AHEM!

Bottom line is that you should NEVER EVER hire a narrator. I can't even reach this guy to tell him about my grievances with the story!

So yeah. Write your own things.

-Star

[bitsofstarsyrup]

"I didn't know about this feature until right this instant now. Tubular."

[bitsofstarsyrup]

Hi, Hello!!

I haven't used tumblr before, but I have☝️lurked! Here is my blog! I hope to share writing in the future, since I have yet to find a website that I can share my original pieces on. Also I can make my page pink! How awesome is that?