blackfeatherheart-blog

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He was there with him.

Everything he heard was real. The softness of his sigh. The way the air hissed sharply when he took a breath. The quietness of his moans. The utter breathlessness of his voice when he whispered his name.

All of it combined into the one thing that mattered.

He was real. So he was complete.

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To My Lord Above Me,

For many nights, I have laid awake, wondering how I could ever put this into words and even if it were possible. The more it robbed me of sleep, however, the more I knew it must be done. Such is the way of many things. So now, I, Kojuurou, sit here putting pen to paper, hoping it will serve my thoughts some justice.

The first years were hard. I could not earn what you would not give: trust has always been something you have gripped tightly. Your illness and the household only served to make matters worse. And then came that fateful night when you asked that task of me... It is something I have never truly forgiven myself for. Part of me yet wonders if I should still have both of mine.

But as the world grew colder, so, too, did you, and that is what made me change my approach. I came to realize you not only needed a mentor; you needed a friend. And so, I tried to be that.

I tried to be someone you could always turn to. I tried to be someone you did not have to hide yourself from. I tried to be someone you could share everything with: your happiness, your sadness, your anger and fears. I opened the warmest places of my heart so that you could learn to open yours.

That was the night my pledge came to me: 'Bonten will become the One-Eyed Dragon Soaring the Heavens'. Most call it merely a pledge, but its meaning was twofold. It was something I was meant to ensure, but it was also something I repeated to myself again and again. It made me lock everything away that would stand n the way of that: my fears, my grief, my anger... It wouldn't serve me at all, so it would not serve you.

As the years passed, I watched you grow and become a man, and eventually, the leader of the Date family. There were many lessons you learned during those first years. We suffered many losses, great and small, and I tried to teach you the importance of each one. I tried to impart in you what it meant to take action and what it meant to be the lord of Oushuu. It took time, but you learned, in your own way.

We fought many battles together, and though it is true we suffered losses and defeats, we also celebrated many victories. You brought joy to your land and put smiles on the faces of your people. You have made friends and rivals, and defeated your enemies. You face the world defiant, ready to overcome with a sharp mind and a devil's grin.

And now, I, Ko--no.

I, Kagetsuna, now stand here on the ground and watch as you soar so far beyond what I had hoped and I am forever humbled, for that is the greatest gift I can ever receive.

--Katakura Kagetsuna Head of the Katakura Family Senior Retainer to the Lord Date Masamune of Sendai, formerly of Oushuu

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"Then you listen to what it truly desires. You care for it. Hone it. Return it to its former glory and give it another chance to live again. To do anything else... well, it'd be a crime, wouldn't it?"

The ninja turned to look over his shoulder just slightly once more before letting out a soft, short laugh, turning his attention back toward the night sky. "You would say something like that. Does your blade speak to you when no one's around?"

"Sometimes. If I ask it very nicely."

Sasuke was glad the other man hadn't decided to move closer when he spoke, if only so he could still hide the faint smile that crossed his face.

"You're getting better at that, you know."

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Sasuke's eyes flew open as he felt a pair of arms slip around him, his body instantly on alert and prepared to retaliate. At least, it was until he caught the familiar scent of cherry blossoms wafting into the air from the source, a hint of wide open spaces and sunlight reminding him of just who it was that had slipped into bed with him. He relaxed and turned his head slightly to see behind him, smiling as he caught sight of warm, honey-brown eyes gazing back at him.

He rolled over in the other man's arms, moving more into their already intimate embrace. The warmth they shared nearly lulled him back to sleep. He leaned his head toward him, ignoring the tickle of the other man's bangs playing across his forehead. Their breath mingled in the small space between their barely lips, the heat they both felt on one another's skin a prelude to what was coming.

"I missed you."

He could barely hear his own voice in that fleeting moment, even with the room around them completely silent. The other man smiled and opened his mouth to reply.

Sasuke's eyes flew open, but he found himself in a very different place. He was back in that strange, foreign, sterile city so far away from home--the one he wished was the dream.

He brought a hand to his lips, touching where his skin still tingled from the heart. His thumb brushed something on his cheek--a wetness almost unfamiliar to him. A bitter laugh echoed around the small room as he raised his arm to cover his eyes, his fist clenching impotently against the urge he felt rising in his chest.

"Dammit. I really do miss you."

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"Hm? What's this?"

"It seems like HIjikata-san made a new friend. That's almost cute."

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"There are many people who ask me why it is I follow this path. It should require no explanation."

"Before I was found by my Lord Hideyoshi, I was aimless. My life had little meaning. I wandered through my life with no guide, no purpose. But my Lord saved me. Breathed life into me. And so I fight for him. To do anything less is unacceptable."

"Many--too many--speak ill of my Lord, daring to call him 'cruel' or 'a tyrant'. They fail to realize all my Lord Hideyoshi does is for the good of these people and this country. Every step he's taken is to bring about the peaceful times this country has longed for. Anyone who dares stand in Lord Hideyoshi's path toward his ideal era deserves no less than death."

"That is why I fight. To remove those obstacles from my Lord's path. I will carve scars in the earth with this blade and fill them with rivers of blood if it means my actions allow him to take one step closer to attaining what he desires. If he must take this life he's given me to achieve his dream, I will not fight him."

"It is in his name I fight. I will give my everything for the man that has given me everything."

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"I find myself asking how long it's been more and more often these days. To be honest... I've almost lost track."

"How long has it been since we've seen one another? I can't remember the last time we shared tales and laughter over hot drinks on a cold night. Or even just shared one another's company as the sun sets beyond the far hills."

"Those... were simpler times. Times when war was the last thing on our minds and we merely spent our days wondering what was around the next bend for us, hoping and dreaming for something more. A peaceful era where those dreams would come true, not only for us, but for those that we love and hold dear. For those that count on us. For everyone."

"Perhaps now we can go back to something like those bygone days. Perhaps we can share our time together again, like we used to. I can only hope as much. Until we can share our laughter together again, stay safe, Motochika, my dear friend."

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"You idiot!"

The words were the only ones that came from Sasuke's mouth as he knelt there, the blood from Keiji's wound seeping onto the ground, already mixing with the rainwater which steadily fell. There were so many other things running through his mind--so many questions, so many worries, so many fears--but that was the only thing he could say. Even still, his throat felt dry and tight, as if he'd been screaming the whole time.

He didn't know he had been in his mind.

"You looked shocked..."

Keiji's voice snapped Sasuke out of his daze and brought his eyes to meet those of the man who had just saved his life. He wanted to look away almost immediately. He couldn't take looking past the flimsy wall Keiji had built to try and mask his pain.

He couldn't take seeing someone like that again.

"Why," came a hoarse whisper. Sasuke clenched his eyes closed, refusing to look at the other man as he waited for an answer. The forced laugh he heard next was like a blade to the heart.

"It's... kinda simple, really. You always... protect everyone else. I thought it'd be nice if... someone finally took a hit for you..."

His throat grew tighter. There was nothing else he could say.

"...you idiot..."

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Keiji never mentions it in the daytime.

He never mentions the way he watches the other man twitch and curl up at night. The way he listens to the small whimpers, the shaky gasps, and the mouthed screams of pain and suffering from memories he thought he'd buried a long time ago. The way he wants nothing more to reach out and take Sasuke into his arms and shield him from all the horrors that lurk in the shadows of his mind.

He never mentions any of it because every time it happens, he just moves closer to him and whispers a single phrase:

"You aren't alone anymore."

Seeing the calm come over him after the words leave his lips is more than enough to keep him quiet.

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The light clinking of the links in the chain almost sounded like bells to Keiji as he sat on the edge of the bed. Tugging the leash lightly earned him a wary glance from the man it was attached to, a subtle warning that he was already treading dangerous ground. It didn't stop a smile from spreading on Keiji's face as he leaned down, wisps of his chestnut brown hair slipping over his shoulders as he reached out and brushed the other man's cheek.

"Don't be like that. You make such a cute little puppy."

The quip earned him a quick bite on the thumb, the other man's hazels eyes flashing slightly as they glared upward.

"You're really pushing it, y'know that?"

"You're the one who said I can have anything I want, Sasuke. And you're the one that lost the bet. But now you're being all mean about it..."

Sasuke rolled his eyes at the playful put Keiji suddenly put on, breathing a sigh. "There's a difference between enjoying something and reveling in it."

"Wouldn't you?"

Silence rang through the room for more than a few heartbeats before he finally said, "This isn't about me."

Laughing off his dodge, Keiji reached out with his other hand and placed it gently on the other side of Sasuke's face, pulling him closer. Despite his annoyed look, Keiji heard the other man's breath hitch as their lips brushed, a prelude to a light kiss.

"Would you prefer it if I called you handsome?"

"At the very least."

"Such a demanding, handsome, little puppy," Keiji murmured, stealing the frown from Sasuke's face away with a nip before it had a chance to form fully. "It seems like I'll just have to wear you out a little to work on that attitude."

"I wish you luck."

"Who needs luck when you have skill?"

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18. Untouchable

He is cold and unrelenting, at least, that's what he appears to be. His focus is as sharp as a razor's edge, and that alone can cut down anyone that stands against him. That is the armor that he's crafted for himself: a frozen shell of malice and resentment, born from years of loneliness and an act of betrayal he will never let go. He keeps warm hands away, not because he fears losing his armor, but because he would never want to expose what's underneath.

She is a fire that burns eternal, a blaze never wavers no matter how the winds may howl. She leads with a will of steel--the same steel that she wrapped her heart in on that day so long ago. Her words are hard, like her resolve to never forget how she felt when she lost what was most important to her. A stone barricade against a soothing touch.

----

He is one born to lead. The weight of a people rest on his shoulders. Yet shadows cast their weight on him as well, past memories haunting him in the night when no one is near. A flashy grin is what he wields to chase them away, and a defiant laugh to mock them as he spreads his wings to take flight. But as he soars, he runs away from a gentle hand that could ease his fears on the darkest nights of all.

He is one born to serve. An ever-watchful eye meant to keep a careful balance between progress and recklessness. But he has his own burdens to bear and his own beast to tame. He feels the chains rattle and strain, but he cannot dare to think of asking someone to help him restrain that monster lurking below the surface. His stoic face and careful manner is all he can use to pass the day to day, a prison-like mask of his own making.

----

A heart can only bear so much before it calls out to another. For some, however, their call can never be answered.

They can never take away their armor, else they may crumble away to nothing.

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There was almost no way to ignore the beauty that stood below them on the grounds under the ridge. The only thing that could break the spell happened by just as the thought came to mind, a brisk wind cutting through light clothing. No matter the effort, the shiver couldn’t be hidden; it was too close to fall. Anyone would have done the same, but it didn't stop one of the two from huddling from embarrassment.

“You cold?”

The question, asked with a casual concern, still managed to startle.

“Ah, no… Please, don’t worry. I’m fine.”

The rustling of the treetops was the only sound that passed between them for what seemed like the longest moment. A meager squeak finally broke the awkward air as one dropped his jacket on the other.

“It’s my summer one, so it’s kinda thin. Sorry”

The ill-fitting thing looked almost comical when it was finally pulled on, but that wasn’t what swallowed the other whole. It was the scent. The scent, and the heat, and the thought of who it came from, and why he’d even given it at all.

A flood of thoughts came all at once, wrapping themselves around the other's head until a haze formed, a muddled state of mind tinged with happy thoughts that would never be spoken of out loud.

“You’re a bad liar, Fujisaki. Just tell me next time.”

“I’m sorry, Oowada-san. But thank you. I’m… very warm now.”

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"Believe me, I'm well aware of the things you try to do. It doesn't go unappreciated."

“I just like keeping you on your toes. If I don’t spice things up every now and again, they’ll get stale. Get it?”

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"You know I would never fail in that."

“Still interested in that? Yeah. I was thinking about taking a dip. Though, will you still be able to watch my back?”

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"Hm... I seem to recall you mentioning something about going for a swim earlier. Am I mistaken?"

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"'Born' into this life... What idiocy."

For all his preaching and fleeting glimmers of intelligence, it was clear Naegi didn't understand a single thing about the life he, Byakuya Togami, the Super High School-Level Heir, was living.

Of course, logically, he shouldn't have expected him to understand anything at all. There were too many intricacies to comprehend. Politics and planning, careful maneuvering, forging your own legacy: all of it was part of being one of the Togami clan. It was far too much for someone like him to even grasp.

True, the Togami name granted liberties and freedoms many could only dream of, but it was not something given. It was something earned.

He was Byakuya Togami. Everything he had done in his life--everything he had gathered and sacrificed--had earned him that prestigious name and the title of Super High School-Level Heir.

"To be 'born' into something... That's nothing more than a handout. As if I would ever need stepping stones. I am Byakuya Togami. I was named heir to the Togami conglomerate because of all I've done and all that I will do.

"The fact he can't understand something like that... I overestimated him."

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There was a pressure so intense upon him that it felt as though he was the one that had been injured. Sitting by his lord's bedside as he slept was all he could do for now. The doctor had come and gone. The servants had, as well.

It was only the Dragon and its Right Eye, as it had been for time on end, it seemed.

Kojuurou sat there, ever vigilant, watching the slow and steady breath of his master. The image of him collapsing in exhaustion played through his mind over and over, and in silence, he scolded himself for letting Masamune push himself beyond his limits yet again. It was one of the few things he could never truly stop the young man from doing.

Ever soaring, he thought to himself, and never thinking of how far he had to fall.

He worried for him, if only because he knew his lord would never worry for himself. There were too many other things already weighing on him for him to even consider it any longer. So it was a burden Kojuurou shouldered silently, constantly, until it threatened to overwhelm his mind. There were several nights where the thoughts plagued his mind in the darkest hours of the night, sending him to one fitful night of sleep after another. But that wasn't something that needed mentioning to Masamune. Hardly any of his worries were, unless it affected the young lord directly. That was simply how it should be.

A small sound brought Kojuurou out of his remembrance of the battlefield briefly. Masamune began to shift, his brows furrowing at some bad turn in whatever dream he dreamt. Kojuurou barely hesitated to lift a hand and set it gently on his lord's head, a touch that would never pass between them otherwise. Relief passed over his face as Masamune settled down once more, the feeling of his hair remaining on Kojuurou's fingers even after he took them away.

He worried for him, but he also had faith in him. He knew his lord would recover. He knew his lord would fight again. He knew he may very well be sitting at his bedside like this again.

But that was his duty. To protect and to serve, to worry and to be strong, to uphold and to support: all of it was what he swore to do so many years ago. And it was what he would continue to do.

A Right Eye until the end.