blackhawks-shuffle

[blackhawks-shuffle]

just saw bindi irwin got engaged and apparently her fiance is american. she’s 21 and they’ve been dating for 6 years. I wonder if his family lives in aus/works in conservation because imagine just being a random 15-year-old tourist at the zoo and having a meet cute with steve irwin’s daughter lol 

[blackhawks-shuffle]

priorites

[blackhawks-shuffle]

All feminists are hairy armpit autistic cunts who probably think “Stare rape” is a real thing.

[blackhawks-shuffle]

Totally forgot to mention this on here, but I got engaged. My best friend of twelve years proposed to me back on the Fourth of July. I never thought I’d be marrying the girl I met back when I was 13. I wasn’t even completely sure whether I like-liked girls at that point. When I met her, she was just the girl that made me laugh harder than anyone. After twelve years, she’s still that girl, but she’s also so much more. I’m so excited to be marrying my best friend. Catch us in 2020 for our big gay wedding. (Also catch me here in my cute af dress and hoops right before the engagement party my future mother-in-law hosted for us).

[blackhawks-shuffle]

[blackhawks-shuffle]

[blackhawks-shuffle]

[blackhawks-shuffle]

40 years ago my dad became the first person in his family to graduate from college when he earned his engineering degree from UIC. And now, 40 years later, I am graduating with my bachelor’s degree from Columbia University. My dad’s parents, who made hardly any money, saved to buy my dad a class ring to celebrate his accomplishments. And like them, my dad purchased me a class ring to celebrate my accomplishments. Here are our rings together: the class of 1979 and the class of 2019. 

[blackhawks-shuffle]

[blackhawks-shuffle]

[blackhawks-shuffle]

I had one hell of a shift tonight...

-I needed to get by a customer so I politely said: “Excuse me, ma’am.” And the woman looked at me and said “You shouldn’t be talking to customers like that.” (It was kinda like would you rather me say: “Move bitch get out the way?”)

-A woman came up to me and said: “I need to run out to my car for a bit, could you watch my kids for me?” And I was like: “Uh no, absolutely not.” She flipped out screaming “WHY NOT!?” I was like: “There are a ton of reasons why I can’t do that while on the clock mainly because it would be a serious breech of safety protocols and quite frankly it’s not my responsibility, but I wouldn’t feel comfortable watching two children, both of whom look under the age of five and are complete strangers to me. I’m a retail worker not a babysitter.” 

-A group of kids came in and were playing hide and seek in our store and just being rowdy, unruly and awful (two of them opened about 20 yogurts and stuck their fingers in them). So I informed management about it and one of them saw me and threw a fucking basketball at me screaming “You bitch-ass narc.” He missed. The ball hit a display damaging some products their parents and later on the police were called when the parents refused to pay for the stuff they damaged.

-A guy came up to me and was like “who do I have to talk to, to figure out why you never have Hood milk?” So I asked if he talked to the guy who orders it, he said “I did and that he said he was ordering all he was allowed to order.  Who do I have to talk to now?” So I told: “Since we’re already ordering the maximum we’re allowed to order, I would suggest voicing your complaint directly to Hood headquarters since they’re located just north of Boston you should be able to find their customer service number pretty easily. Or you could come in on another day, Hood delivers after midnight but before 6 am on Tuesday and Friday mornings.”

-Another customer told our service desk that we were all out of the sale eggs (white eggs were $0.99) and they wanted brown eggs for the same price. So the desk calls me and I told them I had a pallet and a half (45 cases, 30 cartons per case) in the back and I heard a sigh and “She wants you to prove it.” So I took a picture of the pallet and a half and an open case and brought two cartons of white eggs up to the desk and was like: “Here you go.” She was less than thrilled about it.

But yeah, it was a fun 5 hours. 

[blackhawks-shuffle]

back when i was 14/15 this guy raped me and a couple years later he tried to fat shame me when he found out i wasn’t interested in being with him. it’s been 10 years and sometimes i still get hung up on the level of self-delusion that guy has.

[blackhawks-shuffle]

brooklyn (19)99

[blackhawks-shuffle]

it’s sometimes hard to believe rasputin was real. like there’s no non-fucked up part of rasputin’s existence

[blackhawks-shuffle]

me @myself:

[blackhawks-shuffle]

[blackhawks-shuffle]

Happy International Women’s Day 🌹