bontholomew

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Greta Van Fleet lowkey be sounding like Elmo with a little angst and perhaps slightly gay

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*closes eyes during sex* *accidentally chokes her armpit instead*

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Give me head but like, from 3 feet above me so I'm thrusting ridiculously high each time.

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Be my bro

Be my brah

*puts your hands on my dangling tiddies*

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Bottoming in missionary and rubbing my feet along their back. They ask wtf are u doing. I say. I'm giving you a foot massage.

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The line between self-care and self-destruction is a fine one but boy do I walk it gracelessly.

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And I know in my heart

Hurt people hurt people

And we both drew blood

But man, those cuts were never equal

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I wear the jorts in this relationship

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You're HOW hungry?

Save a horse

Eat me 😉

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Do ya ever try to swallow back to back and your body buffers? Like when you flush a toilet but it's still in its refractory period

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Well Damn

i miss the person i pretended to be when they loved me

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❋ * 𝐉𝐔𝐍𝐄 𝐏𝐎𝐄𝐓𝐑𝐘 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒 * ❋ ⠀ a bouquet of metaphors ; spilled ink & summer skin

1. I found your name pressed between the pages of june 2. kissed by the sun but thinking of you 3. you were the underline in every chapter I reread 4. we were prose pretending to be permanence 5. a love like wild thyme & cigarette ash 6. I was the orchard. you only wanted the wine 7. I spilled a bottle of rosé and blamed the stars 8. our love—sun-warmed, barefoot, and wildly unafraid 9. I dressed up for the sunset like it was a lover 10. I made tea and forgave myself again 11. we met in the fantasy section—how fitting 12. you annotated my life with quiet affection 13. some days, I date the sky. some days, I marry the moon 14. joy arrived in sonnets and strawberries 15. I became a bouquet in your hands 16. the cicadas went silent when you touched me 17. June wrote your name in sweat down my spine 18. you made me believe in soft landings 19. I became the girl/boy/person I used to write about  20. the sun came back and so did I  21. I found pieces of us in every golden hour 22. you made summer feel like forever 23. I am my own protagonist and today, I got the love arc 24. june was all lavender 25. you and the strawberry moon 26. we almost had forever. we settled for june 27. my love language is long walks through bookstores and glances 28. film photos from that summer 29. aperol spritz ; the summer air ; you and me 30. the last light of june caught on my collarbone, and lingered

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The Q in Q-tip stands for Qotton

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I hate how my mom thinks if I'm in the bathroom for a long time that I'm puking. It's like, no mom, I'm not bulemic, I'm popping the zits on my pubes. My zubes, if you will.

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How many confessional booths do you think have glory holes in them?

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SO...do bisexuals keep one sock on? Asking for a friend...

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Trying to do something drunk is only capable if you can make a solid BulletPoint in your head