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lunar warmth ballerina

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Love Letter

Dear Jayce Talis,

I̶n̶ ̶2̶ ̶d̶a̶y̶s̶,̶ ̶w̶e̶ ̶w̶i̶l̶l̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶b̶e̶e̶n̶ ̶o̶f̶f̶i̶c̶i̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶w̶o̶r̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶o̶g̶e̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶5̶ ̶y̶e̶a̶r̶s̶.̶

*No… that’s bland… it’s okay, just start over.*

Dear Jayce Talis,

H̶a̶p̶p̶y̶ ̶b̶i̶r̶t̶h̶d̶a̶y̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶h̶e̶x̶t̶e̶c̶h̶ ̶d̶r̶e̶a̶m̶!̶

*No… thats cheesy… why did I even think of that?? Okay okay, I’ll try again.*

Dear Jayce Talis,

W̶e̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶b̶e̶e̶n̶ ̶w̶o̶r̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶o̶g̶e̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶a̶ ̶l̶o̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶i̶m̶e̶,̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶m̶e̶a̶n̶ ̶m̶u̶c̶h̶ ̶m̶o̶r̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶m̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶n̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶k̶n̶o̶w̶.̶ ̶

*Why do I sound like that in my writing…? UGHHHHHH!*

(sigh)

*Fuck.*

…dear Jayce Talis…

For the longest time, I didn’t know how to put what I felt into words. I’ve never been good at that.

*Okay… this is just a draft…*

I don’t think you’ll be able to understand it all if I don’t give you a bit of background information. I’m about to tell you things that you’ve never known about me… and… I’m sorry that I never told you them.

My mother was a brilliant girl. She told me that she liked to tinker with things. She liked the idea of bettering society. For life in the undercity, it was going pretty well for her.

Until at the age of 12, she was suddenly pregnant with me. She never told me how, but I think I can imagine what happened well enough.

I can only imagine what a nightmare it was for her. A literal child. Alone in the undercity. Carrying another child. There was nobody protecting her, nobody helping her. She was going to have to go into labor alone.

And that’s what she did. And throughout it all, she had to keep quiet. At any moment, she could get jumped if she was too loud while giving literal birth.

And then on a rainy night, at exactly 2:49 AM, I was brought into the world. Luckily, none of her organs were too out of place or damaged. But I think everything that mentally built her up was completely rearranged. Any internal bleeding she had came from her head and her head only.

She definitely had some screws loose after that. She took a lot of drugs to cope, and to be somewhat tolerable. But even then, I was terrified of her. I think she hurt me in every way possible. Every day, after my walk, I’d go home and come out with more scratches, bruises, and tears. Sometimes even stab wounds if she was feeling really upset. She’d scream at me about how I ruined her life, and honestly, she’s not wrong.

The worst part was that sometimes it did seem like she loved me. It was rare, but it felt rewarding. She made me a makeshift cane. She always threw me a tiny birthday party. She always made sure I had something to eat, even if she didn’t. And no matter where we went, if it wasn’t home, she was holding my hand.

And then one day, she just left. No goodbye, no note, nothing. I woke up one day and she was gone. She didn’t even take anything. After that, I just sort of hopped around from situation to situation until I was old enough to take care of myself.

Ugh… did I really write all that?

This isn’t about her. This is about us. The point being… I… have a hard time with the subject of feelings. For the longest time, I viewed affection as simply not hurting people. I viewed the bare minimum as affection. I thought being hurt by the adults around me was completely okay, even if I hated it. That was my normal. And as a child, I built up many walls around my feelings, as I was scared that loving people would make them leave me.

They don’t teach you about feelings in the undercity. Honestly, they don’t teach you anything in the undercity except for how to survive. Anything before survival comes second. That includes yourself. Your actual self. You need to protect yourself before actually knowing who you are.

Piltover scared me. It was completely different from everything I knew. I was so untrustworthy of EVERYONE, because people were just… nice to me. For no reason other than being polite.

If Heimerdinger didn’t show me how to soften my walls a bit, I probably wouldn’t be this far in life. I would’ve probably just ran back down to the undercity, where things made sense.

And then you came along.

I think you were the scariest thing to happen to me. But also the greatest. And finally, at the age of 29, I SOMEWHAT have an understand of love.

You’re gentle, patient, and loyal, and kind and probably any good describing word I can think of. But I don’t know how to tell you any of that, because I’m still scared that you’ll leave if I love you too much.

…How do you do it?

How do you so easily love people like that?

How many times will you have to put your hand on my shoulder, before I learn to do it too? How many times can you go on stage and listen to people cheer for you, without thinking you’re undeserving of it, before I can do it too? How many people will you make laugh before I can make people laugh too?

How kind do you have to be to me before I know I’m truly safe with you?

How do you think about those things and have an answer? How do you find the words to tell people that you love them, without coming off as a psycho, like I do?

I don’t even know how I love you. I just know that I do. And I don’t know how to tell you that.

Heimerdinger tells me that I shouldn’t bottle up my feelings. But there’s no feelings in that bottle. Instead, there’s a gross looking mess, that always tries to escape the jar. I’m scared if I let it out, it will hurt people.

You always say that I can tell you anything. But people don’t actually mean that when they say it. Usually they have a limit. Whenever I tell people anything, they’re suddenly disgusted.

Would you still view me the same if I told you about how I ruined my mother’s life? Or how I still mourn the cold embraces she used to give me at night? Or how even though she hurt me so bad, I can’t figure out how to hate her, because she gave up her life for me?

Would you still view me the same if I told you that I didn’t know how to brush my teeth until my 20s, and that I still struggle with it?

Would you still view me the same if I told you I actively helped a man make drugs from scratch as a kid?

Would you still view me the same if you knew that I could potentially be in love with you?

I sound like a lunatic. I know. I don’t know how to not sound crazy.

You showed me what affection was. You showed me how love works.

I have never loved anyone as much as I love you. You’re the first person that has genuinely felt like home to me. You, and our Hextech dream.

I love you, Jayce Talis.

…

*God… this is so icky…*

…

*Forget it.*

**he rips the paper apart**

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Arcane fandom, I’m gonna tell you something:

VIKTOR IS A DISABLED MAN

Shocking, right? You know it already, right?

Then do NOT draw/write Viktor unless you actually want to draw/write a disabled man. This is not a negotiable aspect of his character, the same way Jayce being latino or Mel being black are non-negotiable.

If you do not want to write/draw a disabled character with all that it entails, you don’t actually want to draw and write Viktor.

And no, it’s not enough to draw the braces and cane like they are props or decorations, you need to have at least a vague understanding of what they are for and how his body works. If you are not willing to ask questions or do at least some basic research, write about a different character.

I am TIRED of your sports AU where he’s either able-bodied or you pretend he’s disabled but he still performs tasks that would be impossible for his actual canon disability. I am TIRED of your NSFW fanarts where his back is bent in ways that would be hard to achieve even for a very flexible able-bodied person.

I’m not saying your Viktor/Jayvik stories need to be about disability, but they need to be about a disabled man. This means respecting his body and representing it truthfully with its limitations. Which might mean that certain plots/tropes will not work for him.

If Viktor being disabled gets in the way of your story or your fantasy, either change your story or use a different character. And please ask yourself why you wanted to put him in situations incompatible with his disability in the first place.

I’ll never be the one to point fingers and call people ableist if they’ve made a mistake in the past. I just ask you guys to do better in the future and treat Viktor’s identity as a disabled man with the due respect.

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lil doodle from the other day born out of an overwhelming annoyance that for some reason body hair is associated with masculinity despite Everyone Having It. so why not draw a cute hairy girl about it

[image description: a drawing of a tan-skinned woman with brown and blond dyed hair pulled into a ponytail and copious body hair and stubble. she is smiling and doing a peace sign gesture with her hand. next to her is text saying "body hair has no gender!" end id]

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I'm still not okay after reading the Playlist for When Your Boyfriend Stops Breathing by @sunsetplums, still listening to the playlist too ˙◠˙ p.s. Birb’s name is Mango, she used to live with the fic’s author but passed away just a couple days ago so now Jayce is looking after her. Faint music on the bg is My děti ze stanice Bullerbyn by Květy

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People don't actually grow out of their emo phases. People are forced out of their emo phases by employers who get a raging boner over controlling how their employees dress, cut their hair, whether they mod their bodies and so on

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real shit

One thing I find hilarious is that people forget that Jayce had proof of magic. That man experienced a miracle and spent his life seeking out how to recreate it. How to bring magic to the people. It was all based in proof, experience.

Viktor was the one working based on belief, in himself, and in Jayce. Viktor came at Hextech simply on faith.

And yet, when people write fic, Viktor is basically the one who lacks whimsy. Who lacks wonder. Who works entirely on empirical evidence. Like only Jayce is allowed to be awed or curious about the unknown.

Who....who are you talking about right now?

My good people, Viktor is reserved but whimsical af. That man saw a giant salamander in a cave as a child and made it his bestie. That man gets asked if something is safe and cringes or shrugs with an "Of course not." That man heard "magic" and went "fuck yeah lets go".

Viktor isn't cold, emotionally, or to the wonder in the world. So, stop it. Give him back his whimsy.

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IT'S TIME! The Far-Fetched Animated Pilot Kickstarter has officially LAUNCHED! To kick things off, here's a first look at our fully animated series opening!

Consider donating, spread the word, and help us bring this beast to life!

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lesbians 🔥🙏

This is Temperence and Pivver and they’re girlfriends :)

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Temperence Fosner

small trypophobia warning

hiii i hope it’s okay to add my oc to this lore.

This is Temperence Fosner. Coming from a broken family after they birthed three children with an extremely rare condition. A bad case of the holes. Isolated her whole life, and zoo animal treatment from the community has made her develop a hard shell around her feelings. Now coming off as bored, monotone, crabby, and maybe a little elegant.

Assassinates government officials of the island she lives on in the dead of night. Absolutely no trace of them the next day. The holes in her skin hold electricity, something she’s used to dabble in concepts of puppets and resurrection. Using brain cells from her victims to bring her little creations to life.

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another art dump but it’s mostly just practice

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Omg my blanket was cooking near the vent and I just threw it over my cold ass legs agjfneoosle it’s so nice

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art dump :) (small trypophobia warning)

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hazbin headcanons

my headcanons for hazbin hotel

tw for murder, manipulation, suicide, and corruption.

Charlie

-Cannot drink energy drinks. It will ruin her for the next few weeks. -Doesn’t look like it, but she listens to 90s rap.

-Cares so deeply about sinners and their struggles, but couldn’t care less about imps and their struggles. -Honestly kind of corrupt. Dare I say the sugary and sickly sweet variation of a politician.

Vaggie

-Is actually not Heaven born, and had a life on earth, but because she fit all the requirements to be an exorcist, they let her do it. They don’t let winners be exorcists anymore because they’re “imperfect” like vaggie was.

-Was verbally abused by Adam.

-Actually does still have an angel form of a moth, it’s just very subtle.

-Charlie tends to glow a lot, and moths are attracted to light.

-Is going to enter a villain arc after being in a toxic relationship with Charlie for so long.

-Very good friends with Husker. They bonded over hating alastor and pull pranks on him. Sometimes when Alastor has a moment, he lays down on the ground. When this happens, vaggie and husk poke him with a stick repeatedly.

Angel Dust

-A very complicated person. Doesn’t exactly fall into a category of person, and is instead just all over.

-Secretly a massive metal head. -His feet hurt from walking in heels constantly. -Horrified of spiders

-is occasionally possessed by the spirit of bigotry, causing him to say something like “GOD TOLD ME TO WIPE THE HOMOSEXUALS OFF OF MURRICA!1!1!1” in a really deep southern accent. He will then go back to normal and talk about how scary that was.

Alastor

-His father took his own life in front of Alastor when he was only 3

-He perceived Roo as an imaginary friend when he was alive. When he was a child-teen, Roo would manipulate him into killing people for her. Which doesn’t excuse it at all, btw. -Thinks he can fight hygiene.

-His name was Alexander when he was alive.

-He was an edgy teenager who would follow the stereotypical teen thing where you go up to your room and thrash to heavy metal when you’re upset. However, because heavy metal and thrashing weren’t really a thing at the time, he would go up to his room and tap dance in anger. He would plant bombs under people’s cars during Halloween and called himself “The Alligator” unironically as some type of street name.

Husker

-Chews up Alastor’s medication.

-Had some issues with his mother that led to him being the way he is. -Tired of living.

-Can build a tank engine from scratch. -catnip gives him headaches

-He’s actually chubby

Niffty

-Head is usually empty

-Lobotomized.

-Was married to Vox in the 50s. She was too emotional for his liking, so he had her lobotomized. But the lobotomy only made her violent. So he stabbed her 3 times with a screwdriver and dragged her dying self to a deep puddle of mud and threw her in the puddle to drown. This caused her need to keep everything clean. She only subconsciously realizes that.

I don’t have any sir pentious headcanons rn. I hope you liked the ones I have :)