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The Bell Jar, Sylvia Plath

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Does anyone else sabotage everything good in their life without even realizing it until it's too late and feel trapped in bad situations so you do impulsive things or is it just me.

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Been doing this cool new dieting trick where I wake up at noon so I can avoid eating breakfast and being conscious

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I love to get piercings, I have 17 so far and I wanna get my belly button pierced so iv decided when I get to 130lbs I'll be close to my ugw and I'll reward myself by getting it.

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When I say “please don’t take a picture of me” it’s not because I’m being bitchy and stubborn, it’s because if I see that picture I will seriously feel so bad about myself and think I am the ugliest thing on earth and sink a little deeper into self consciousness and hatred.

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Don’t tell your daughter that when a boy is mean or rude to her it’s because he has a crush on her. Don’t teach her that abuse is a sign of love.

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You hate yourself so loudly. You hate yourself at the top of your lungs. Your loathing for yourself permeates your speech. “Sorry I’m just rambling.” “Don’t worry about it.” “Just ignore me.” “Sorry if I’m annoying you.” “Sorry I don’t make sense.” “Sorry about that.” Sorry, sorry, sorry. You act as if you have to beat everyone else to the punch. As if the punching bag is you. If you hate yourself first, if you hate yourself loudest, then nobody will hurt you. You clapped your hands over your ears and shut your eyes and balled yourself up so that you’d never have to experience people’s loathing for you. And it meant you never heard their love. You drowned it out. You screamed your hatred over it. And you never got to hear it. 

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A toxic trait I have is when someone tells me they haven't eaten all day ill preach to them about fueling their body and how it's bad for them to miss meals meanwhile I haven't eaten anything in a week.

#Hypocrite

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I feel like my all or nothing mentality is terrible with an ed...ugh

Ps. This gross weather is really putting me in a stay in the house and never leave kinda vibe.

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I have a crush on this girl..I just don't know if she's 🏳️‍🌈💖 and I'm starting to feel like I should wait to make a move until after I get to my goal weight

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If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my fear of abandonment, mood swings, black and white thinking, social anxiety, intense emotions, impulsive behavior, lack of direction in life, and depression

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