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[capiscer-blog]

the signs in a zombie apocalypse

aries: directly running up to the zombies & whacking their heads off and cursing everyone out for their cowardliness

taurus: hiding out in the supermarket gathering stock because it’s the safest job and they’re tired of everyone arguing

gemini: lowkey panicking but trying to keep their shit together and lead while hoping an earth sign takes the lead

cancer: instructing breathing exercises while actively struggling to breathe and looking for pisces

leo: behind aries letting them do the dirty work and kicking the already dead zombie corpse just to feel accomplished

virgo: holding everyone down with actual well thought out plans & commands only to have basically everyone do the opposite

libra: complaining the entire time and confused with who to stick around with. upset that they’re dying a virgin

scorpio: collecting weapons and keeping them away from fire signs because “they don’t know better” while also dodging any questions regarding their extensive supply

sagittarius: the least panicked of all the signs, enjoying being hunted. completely tunes out cap and virgos commands and points out every 10 seconds the fact they saw this happen in a movie

capricorn: eye twitching at the realization they’re surrounded by absolute morons. brainstorming an actual survival guide. arguing with aqua over their absurdity

aquarius: pulls out a fully detailed zombie apocalypse folder from a file cabinet in their bedroom and telling everyone “they’ve got this”. arguing with cap and virgo over their control freak ways

pisces: dead on the ground after yelling out spiritual mantras while every sign was warning pisces to watch out