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Conan, trying to act younger: I have a headcanon about the murderer

Heiji: Can you PLEASE just say deduction like a normal detective?

Conan: Do you want to hear my murderer headcanon or not?

Heiji: …go on

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I recently watched the 24th Conan Movie and now I want one of those watches Agasa designed even more - like, I wanted one when it was just normal flashlights, but in that movie Conan also has a black light?? and he circled through some other light colors too?? Boy is carrying half a forensics lab on his wrist and I want one.

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Sonoko always acts like she doesn't like the detective boys, but she still keeps inviting them to cool trips and events. I think it's save to say that she not-so-secretly adores those weird, weird kids.

I love imagining her as a sort of strangely intense aunt to them when Shinichi goes back to being himself. Fully embracing the fact that, if Ran and Shinichi are the big sibling figures, those kids now also belong to her extended family.

So she keeps inviting them to things. Then that starts to include buying them souvenirs to remember those trips. Then escalates to sonoko abducting them after school to go clothes shopping, or maybe even go to a fancy tailor, because "I want you to come to this Gala my new charity is throwing, and you are getting too old to pull off the cute little kids cheap look - You'll need proper evening clothes, don't you argue with me." The kids are bewildered, but reluctantly take it.

(they assume sonoko wants them to help getting donations at the gala, and see the clothes as necessary for this purpose - otherwise they wouldn't have taken them, because they don't want to benefit off of their friendship to sonoko.)

(sonoko had not, actually, planned to use the kids to squeeze more money out of the rich friends of her parents that she'd invited. In fact, she'd mostly wanted to have some people there she actually likes - and maybe throw Mizuhiko in front of that friendly lawyer who's looking for a part time assistant. She does appreciate their efforts, though.)

It continues well into their adulthood, with Sonoko throwing gifts at the kids when she knows they can't refuse them, while complaining about them always tagging along. With her sending offers for internships and job opportunities their ways, with a too carefully worded to actually be dismissive statement.

Ran and Shinichi are just watching fondly from the sidelines, sipping their tea while ayumi angrily tries to give back the pretty-but-too-damn-expensive jewelry Sonoko gave her for her birthday.

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With their strong sense of justice and interest in basically everything, i bet the detective boys will grow up to be very effective activists, for various causes. Like, they won't stand for injustice of any kind even as kids, so imagine what they will be like when they get older.

I imagine Ayumi carrying around protest signs in school on fridays, because she'll head right to that protest after last period. Or running around with a clipboard to collect signatures for worthy causes. Volunteering for different organizations. She's charming and likes working with people, so she would like to do groundwork and approach people personally.

Genta is the king of bake sales. Or anything food related that can be helpful in raising money for charity. He's even interviewed by a local TV station one christmas season, because his cookie sale for charity spiraled into a bigger event than he expected. He's also amazing at organizing food and drinks for everyone when they go protesting - because fighting for justice is hard work and they need their strength.

Meanwhile, Mizuhiko is their organization guy. One one hand, he's the guy planning how they get to and from protests or volunteer work, but on the other hand, he's also the one who curates a list of contacts they can utilize. He’s the one who sends around emails to everyone he thinks might be interested in a specific event or charity, for maximum information spread. He’s also the one who calls in any and all useful contacts they made from cases - like “that guy said he owes us one because we saved him from prison, maybe he’ll let us throw that event at his restaurant” or “the wife of that one murder victim told us to let us know if we ever need help - do you think she’d give us a good discount on printing our fliers in her copy shop?”. plus, he shamelessly and regularly hits up all of their wealthy contacts for donations to different causes.

They rope Shinichi into coming with them because their parents think they need “adult supervision”.

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When Ran finally moves out into her own flat, neither her father nor Shinichi are allowed to come with her to look at apartments. They're also explicitly forbidden from helping her move, and she actively hides her new address from them for the first few weeks she's living there.

She does NOT want her new apartment to become a crime scene, and she also does not want her neighbors' first impressions of her to be tainted by a corpse dropping down at her feet.

Again.

So she carefully un-invites shinichi and her dad until she has at least met all of her new neighbors once, just to be save.

(Shinichi is annoyed by this - he does not stumble into a case everywhere. Honestly, it's not THAT bad... Right?

Kogoro is just glad he doesn't have to haul furniture around.)

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Takagi is such a pushover for the detective boys - it's going to be hilarious when they are teenagers. Like, Megure is already stupidly fond of Shinichi, but Takagi literally drives them around for their investigations when they demand it.

Those kids are going to strong-arm him into so much ridiculous shit. I mean, Genta demanding to be invited to dinner as 'payment' for helping with a case will be the least of his problems.

(Meanwhile Sato in the background is torn between laughing at him and thinking fondly that he'll make a great father some day)

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Let’s be honest, Professor Agasa could probably make a lot of money if he sold his watch-flashlight technology. Those watches the detective boys have are amazing, even without Conan’s stun darts.

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Imagine Conan and Shinichi were NOT the same person, but everyone THINKS they are.

Like, Shinichi survives the poison and goes into witness protection/an undercover investigation, and by complete chance the funky little kid he sometimes entertains when the boy is visiting professor agasa needs a temporary home.

They meet briefly while Shinichi gets to pick up some shit from his house, and he feels sorry for the kid (he knows what it's like when your parents leave you behind), so he swears Conan to secrecy and gives him his phone number.

And then everyone has this completely ridiculous idea that Shinichi shrunk into a six year old.

It's mostly Conan dealing with it, but Shinichi gets very entertaining texts:

"You need to come back soon. Your girlfriend keeps looking at me like she wants to hit me for 'lying' about my identity - i won't survive if she karate kicks me into a wall!"

"Have you met that teenage detective from osaka? He is at once the most brilliant, and the most stupid person I ever met. He solved the case as quick as I did, but somehow he also got to the conclusion that I am you! He keeps calling me kudo. If I am killed by the black org because of him, i expect you to avenge me."

"why is everyone i meet delusional? Ran's english teacher is actually an FBI agent, and she also thinks I'm you. I couldn't make this up if i tried."

"You said Inspector Megure is smart! He just pulled me aside, called me Kudo and said that I should let him know if there's any way for him to help! What is wrong with all of these people??"

"That gentleman thief just pretended to be you in front of ran - he strongly hinted it was to help me protect my identity. I really don't understand why everyone thinks I'm you! ....the worst thing is that it didn't work. Ran's still convinced - she still hasn't said anything, but her looks, Shinichi!"

They always cheer Shinichi up - he doesn't have much else to laugh at at the moment.

(it becomes a lot less funny when he comes back and realizes all the crazy stuff people let a literal child get into because they thought it was him)

(but it is hilarious to see all of their faces when they see both of them together the first time)

(he could have done without the kaito kid cheek pulling check though. Ouch.)

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I like the idea that, when Shinichi or any of the gang go to university/college, they take a course in psychology and their teacher gets super interested in them. Think about it, there would be a lot of reasons someone who is interested in how the mind works would be interested in our crazy group:

- first of all, how are none of you totally traumatized? You see more dead bodies than most coroners, and most of them viciously murdered. Do you all have any special coping mechanisms? Are you numb to all of the death because you've been around it since you were young? Or is it some sort of group effect, that the support system keeps you from loosing it?

- allll the anecdotes they can provide about the behaviours of and justifications from criminals. That alone could be interesting - like, for people studying why someone becomes a murderer or something.

- also, the general trend [in the detective Conan universe] of child/teen detectives. What is this phenomenon? Why does it seem to happen only in Japan? And, in the case of the detective boys: are their observational skills and other detective traits talents that they inherently have, or are those learned behaviours? Taught to them by [Conan/Shinichi/Kogoro, depending on the cover story for 'Conan']?

- how does this extraordinary thought process work? Is it a talent, a way of processing information that all these kids are born with? If it's not and it's a learned behaviour, where does it come from, and what exactly are the computational steps their minds go through in solving a case? Can anyone learn it? Is there a reason why it's kids displaying this ability, i.e. is there a sort of 'cut-off' age for learning this kind of thinking?

- how much of the process is really evidence based and how much relies on interpersonal skills, i.e. observing the suspects and analysing their body language? What role does empathy play?

I bet you could come up with even more related things. I just think it's funny imagining their prof going off topic and randomly starting to question them, and then whoever this happens to needs to dodge requests from the nosy teacher who'd like to get brain scans from them and their friends.

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In the Kudo household, there is more than one set of the Sherlock Holmes novels and short stories.

There's the fancy, expensive looking set that lives in their big library. Those are for purely for pleasure, the kind of book you read curled up in an armchair on a cold winter evening before carefully setting it back in its place. They have been read the fewest amount of times.

Then, there is a cobbled together but complete collection that Shinichi collected throughout his childhood and early teens. It's all mismatched paperbacks in various sizes and from five different publishers, because he bought them cheaply with his bit of pocket money. They live in his room, in a shelf close to his bed, and he has read all of them at least five times. The margins are filled with notes and comments he made, in different colored pens because even on the fifth read, there are still new things to comment on. They are well worn, and even though Shinichi takes care of them well, the amount of use they get means that they fray around the edges and don't look their best anymore.

('Conan' has started a similar collection, and the few titles he has managed to buy with his pocket change are stacked next to his schoolbooks against the wall in the room he shares with Kogoro.)

There are also three dusty Holmes books on Yukiko's bedside table. She keeps trying to read them, so she can follow her husband and son's discussions better, but she always looses interest a few pages in, giving up only to try again a few weeks later.

Yusaku also has his own set, in theory. A few tattered and torn, as well as heavily annotated, of his Holmes books are flying around the house still, but mostly he takes them with him when they travel. There they end up on sandy beaches, gathering saltwater stains, or are being used as coasters on fancy hotel tables, before inevitably getting forgotten on a plane or left behind in a café. He just buys new ones when he is in the mood for a particular story - which is the reason why the few books he has in the house also tend to have a double in a suitcase or a different room somewhere.

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Someone films Conan doing one of his crazy skateboard stunts and puts it on the internet.

It becomes an instant viral video.

The next day in school, Conan has to frantically deny that it's him in the video -

- that denial includes 'proving' he's not a good skateboarder by falling on his face.

It's humiliating, and the other detective boys send him suspicious looks for a week after.

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I re-watched the Monster Gomera Case recently, and it made me realize - another thing the detective boys do semi-often is meet people who make movies or visit film sets. And then solve a murder there, or save someone's life, the usual.

I bet there is a list of movies that have some kind of tribute or thank you to the detective boys in their credits.

"This movie wouldn't have been possible without the help from The Detective Boys - Ayumi, Conan, Genta and Mitzuhiko, thank you for believing in our innocence and fighting for our freedom."

"Dedicated to our beloved [murder victim].

With thanks to the Detective Boys, for ensuring justice for him."

"With special thanks to the little detectives who saved us from the sea monster"

Sometimes they have movie nights where they watch those movies, not because they're good, but because they can shout and yell when they see their names on screen at the end.

[There are also some movies "inspired" by the detective boys - but Eri usually makes quick work of suing anyone who infringes on the kids' personality rights. Plus, she filed a trademark for the detective boys - who knows, maybe they'll want to use it someday.]

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I often think about what will happen with the detective boys when detective conan comes to a end. Like, it seems obvious that Shinichi wil get his body back, and the adults around him sort of need to learn about what happened (though it would be kind of hilarious if a handful of people didn’t learn about the Conan=Shinichi thing - like, Kogoro and Shiratori, for some odd reason.)

But what happens with the detective boys? Do they learn about Shinichi? What would that do to them? To learn that their best friend is actually a teenage boy and only ever pretended to be their friend? (at least, that is what it would look like to them) That this friend that they look up to and learned so much from is fake? That the person who taught them that truth is the most important thing, who taught them to find the truth - was lying the whole time? What does that do to kids like them, who are always so intense about everything?

But maybe they would take it in stride - Conan was always teaching them stuff and looking out for them. It makes sense that he’s really Shinichi-nii, and now he can take them on trips and teach them more things!

... or maybe they don’t tell them at all. The Conan cover has a built in exit strategy - they could just tell the kids that he suddenly had to move back to his parents. Maybe Shinichi would call them a few times with the voice modulator, write a few letters. Then slowly let the contact drift off, the way children at that age do - and one day, the detective boys will look at each other and realize that they haven’t heard from Conan in months.

And maybe that’ll just be it, and conan will be a ghostly memory for the rest of their lives, the weird friend that was only there for a short time, but who changed their lives in a way they would never forget.

But maybe they’ll put all that detective training to use and try to track him down - giving the police officers who were tasked with faking Conan’s identity (for the sake of secrecy, kind of like a witness protection sort of thing) grey hairs. They try for years to find him, untangle all the clues - and well, in the end there is only one truth. (Shinichi isn’t amused when 14 year old detective boys suddenly appear on his doorstep to tell him how they figured out who he is/was. He’s impressed, don’t get him wrong - just not amused.)

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When inspector Megure learns about the whole Conan/Shinichi/Black Organisation thing, he's going to track down Shinichi's parents to tear them both a new one.

"How can you keep gallivanting around the world when your son is threatened by a dangerous criminal organisation?!"

Yusaku's ears are still ringing days later.

(Him and Yukiko are sort of living on fear of the day Megure finds out what they did when they figured it out - in hindsight, kidnapping their own son and scaring him half to death by making him believe they are agents from the black org was... Not a good idea?)

(Shinichi feels both weirdly touched by Megure's concern and highly amused at his parents' plight - it's nice that someone else is getting yelled at, too)

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You know how Conan or the detective boys semi-regularly save kidnapped children around their age? Imagine one or two of them move and are suddenly in their primary school. Like, maybe not the same class, but a year under them.

A tiny, grateful little stalker following them around the school playground. Then they tell the story of their heroic rescue to their classmates, and suddenly the detective boys have a gaggle of slightly tinier children following them around like little ducklings.

The detective boys shift between excited pride and total annoyance about their new little fanclub.

Their teachers think its adorable.

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We never really get to know what all the other police officers think of Conan. Like the actual uniformed officers that always lurk around in the background, the ones getting asked weird questions by a six year old, just before that same kid claims their uncle wants them to do this even weirder obscure thing that ends up opening a locked door from two rooms over or something like that.

They have to think he's some cursed little cryptid right? Like, there are definitely some weird rumors going around between them, especially because the kid regularly just - disappears? Or appears in corners he wasn't in before.

Plus, he attracts even more dead bodies than Kogoro Mori, so he has to be cursed, right?

("Don't you think it's weird that Kogoro started to stumble over a dead body every week after the boy moved in with him?"

"What are you - that kid is six?!"

"No, i don't mean he's like, killing them or something. Not on purpose anyway."

"then what do you...?"

"Shinigami?"

"... don't be ridiculous")

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All of the Detective Boys should do some form of martial art. Just look at how often Ayumi is taken hostage - if I was any adult in their lives I would insist on sending them somewhere to learn how to defend themselves. Just look at how useful karate and kendo are for Ran and Heiji - I wouldn't emulate Shinichi and rely on soccer.

Plus, it would be cool if they all chose something different and became little badasses. Like, Genta dominating in Judo, Mizuhiko winning Karate competitions, Ayumi knocking down boys two heads taller than her in Aikido.

Professor Agasa would come to all competitions to cheer them on - probably with a little detective boys flag he made himself.