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cassiopeiasdaughter · 2 months

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labyrinth

Theodore Nott x fem!reader

part of the midnights collection

February 22nd 1999

Dear Diary,

Everything is fucked.

Notice how I only write when somethings terribly wrong? Well, try not to be too surprised with this entry.

Up until a few days ago everything seemed to go fine- well as fine as it could, given everything going on.

We’ve been making progress, rescuing muggles and muggleborns, shutting down attacks, even the horcrux hunt seemed to be going well, it felt like we had reached the beginning of the end.

But we were so fucking wrong.

There was an attack last week, well two of them. One was a distraction and the other one…well two safe houses were compromised, most of the order members got out on time, but two died. A Hufflepuff and a Ravenclaw, a year older than me. I never talked to them at school, but I knew them, I remember seeing them during breakfast and at hallways. And now…

I kept thinking how it could have been me, and I hate myself for being this selfish, for not being the bigger picture. It’s survival instinct, I know, but I wish I could overcome it, ever since the war started I keep finding myself, wishing I was someone I’m not.

The only thing worse than dying in an attack, like that, would be, being the only one left. What if I survive and everyone I love dies, what’s the point of winning this- if there is nothing left, after. If the world ends up destroyed beyond repair, why keep fighting? For Harry, who claims the Light- Good will win?

Harry who could be a Horcrux? Yes, I know. Its unthinkable but Hermione and Moody think it’s true, it could be a possibility we shouldn’t ignore. It could explain so much that, almost everything that has happened all the years. His ability to speak with snakes, the nightmares, the visions. They could be tied to that. And if it is true, what then?

I had

I slept with Theo on New Years, I… don’t know how to feel about it. It feels stupid even writing about it with the direction our world has taken.

It was weird at first, the next day, things felt different. It felt as if…the safety I feel when he is in my room, when we sleep next to eachother at night, it felt like that safety had spread everywhere, like it followed me around the next day.

I thought I would feel self-conscious around him, but I don’t, it feels as if he is the only thing left that makes sense. Maybe, it our way to cope, getting drunk isn’t practical and getting high…well I can’t do that everyday. Maybe having sex is our way to get through this war, sane?

Although, it doesn’t feel like it’s that simple to me, it’s not just a coping mechanism, for me at least. But I won’t get into that, it’s selfish and wrong to think about that when there are bigger problems out there, tearing my sleeve as they beg for my attention.

Hermione has been doing a lot of research into Horxcruxes, Malfoy helps her a lot, he tells her everything he’d heard that summer- before 6th year. He, told Moody about his aunts vault, at Gringotts, how she had it checked every month, she was paranoid about it, that’s what he said. They think there is something important there. Bellatrix and her family, they have been nothing but loyal to Voldemort, all these years, it would make sense for her to be trusted with something as important as this.

The Order, planned a mission tonight, a run-in at Gringotts, to at least inspect the vault, or find a way inside, and if they are lucky, find the Horxcrux.

They

You stare at the page in front of you, you can’t bare to continue writing, because what you are about to write, is the thing that’s been eating you alive all afternoon. You can’t explain how Theo was sent on this mission, how he could be recognized and then-

You don’t want to think about what could happen next, not if you want your breathing to remain even and your stomach settled. Instead, you charm your diary and conceal everything you’ve written, from the outside world, and then head downstairs, wait with the rest of the house.

“Any news?” You ask worried

“No, not even a Patronus.” Hermione shrugs and hands you a cup of tea

You grip the hot mug with both hands, savoring the warmth in your skin, taking in the smell and focusing on the feeling it wakes inside of your chest. Ginger, lemon and honey.

It reminds you of your childhood and the drinks your mother made you every time you got sick. Then, your family and summers with them, flash before your eyes. You would always miss Hogwarts in the summertime, all your friends would be either at the Burrow or at their homes, far away from your summer house. You’d complain about how isolated you felt then. It is almost ridiculous to think now. You would give anything for one more summer, taking walks at the beach- savoring the orange sky and the way it kissed the sea, how the color got lost in the water and danced on the waves. And then, as you think of the waves- you imagine the house Theo had told you about, that night. And how you would go there, once the war is over. And perhaps, this is the first time you��ve felt nostalgic about a place you’ve never visited before.

You’ve clung to the hope of an after so hard, that this house- the one by the sea, with the perfect library and velvet loveseats, almost feels like home. You’ve painted a new picture of safety in your brain and the walls and colors of the house fit the drawing perfectly.

Then again, maybe, it isn’t the house that plants this hope inside you, but it’s the person that would join you. The one who would fill the house with laughter and stories, the one whose smell would float through each room and the one who’d make it a home.

But that person isn’t here, and the frailty of his return shatters you.

“They’ll come back. Moody is with them. They’ll be fine”

Your friend offers knowingly. As if your fears have spilled out of you and have turned into a cloud around the two of you, turning everything darker and colder.

You can only nod in response and ask about her progress and the boys, in hopes that her words will distract you.

“You went flying yesterday.” She says with a smile “I haven’t seen you fly, since… Hogwarts.” Since Dumbledore died

“You’ve seen me fly on missions.”

“Yeah but that’s different, you looked free yesterday- it took me back to quidditch practice. Remember how I’d watch you three practice?”

“Yeah; I remember you had a different book every single time. Ron always joked about that”

“I miss it” she says tear-eyed “And I miss the boys and-and” my parents you think to yourself and grab her hand tightly- anchoring her to you.

“I am so tired.” She finishes; and it hits you then how much this war has changed her. From the color of her face- to the spark in her eyes, everything now seems washed out.

Voldemort and his followers have taken pieces of her, of Theo, Ron, Harry, one at a time, stealing memories and feelings, taking away their safety and friends, leaving behind nearly empty shells; that fight- fight back and desperately try to reverse everything. And you can’t help but think of why they-why you keep fighting back. You can’t possibly undo everything that’s has been done so far. You can’t bring people back to life, you can’t reverse stolen memories or forget new ones. You can’t chase away the demons that will hunt you at night. With or without Voldemort in this world, you struggle to decide if it is worth saving in the end.

Defeat one evil just for the next one to appear? To bring more nightmares and fights? More death?

At last, it may be that you keep fighting- because if you stop now, after everything that’s happened, everything you’ve had to face, and do, ultimately it will all have been for nothing. And that; is a fate worse than Voldemort winning, worse than death.

“I know you are.” You reply and open your arms for her to hide in. Hide and then let everything out- every disappointment and regret. Cry and hide from the world just for a few minutes, because that’s the only thing you or anyone can give her, right now.

They haven’t returned yet.

You finish writing a few hours later, with the weight of the night sky settling on your shoulders; the constant thought of “they should have come back by now.”, sitting at the pit of your stomach.

You notice a few of Theo’s things around the room, a sweater on your chair, a couple of books on the floor by his side of the bed. You realize then, the pattern you two have fallen into, a life inside the one you already live in. Intimacy; the kind that scared you once, is now your only shelter: your refuge from reality. It’s because of that newfound intimacy, that your room now feels lived in, and isn’t a gray space for you to sleep in. Its because of another person, that you feel protection at night and warmth despite the blistering cold.

The chance of never feeling his warmth again- paralyzes you. And it shouldn’t, because the chance of him not making it back tonight- or after a mission- the possibility of him dying, is a reality you must come to terms with, if you want to keep fighting this war sane And you almost laugh at the irony of that thought

And it is a cliche, its something you’d normally condemn stupid and immature- but there is nothing normal about this, so you must act accordingly.

I shouldn’t have gotten this close you begin writing but you hear voices all of a sudden and the familiar creak of the floor outside your room.

The door opens and its him, no blood, no limping- a darkens under his eyes- sharper than the one you’ve seen before.

“Hi.” He whispers and his eyebrows soften almost instantly.

You shouldn’t have gotten this close you remember, but you can’t control your legs as they move towards him- and you can’t help the way your body molds to his.

“You’re back.” You breathe in his scent as you bury your face in his chest, your hands gripping his jacket tightly- keeping him as close as you can.

He doesn’t say anything back, he just lowers his head to your hear- breathing you in in return.

You’ll stay like that for a few seconds, before you ask how the mission went, if everyones alright… You’ll stay frozen for a little while, before you have to force yourself to stay away from him, before you reprogram your brain to learn to cope without the comfort of his touch, or the whispered words he speaks into your hair at night.

I have to get away, remind yourself as you kiss him goodnight.

I need to get away, you think again, as you watch him fast asleep in your bed.

How will I get away? you ask hopeless as you hear the beat of his heart and let his arms trap you.

a/n: am I happy with this chapter? no. Was it necessary for me to finish it so this story could get moving? yes

taglist: @avalynlestrange @spacecadet16 @lucywritess @aleviia @marina468 @annaisabookworm @liarajoah @notasadgirlipromise @pariseffer @unlikelysadgirl @ktz-bb @lizisthecoolest

btw free Palestine!

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cassiopeiasdaughter · 5 months

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i see the reminder you put at the bottom of your posts that english isn’t your first language and that you apologise for mistakes but i just wanted to say that your writing is so lovely and i haven’t seen a single mistake. i admire anyone who speaks more than one language and to write so wonderfully in another is so amazing<3

this made my (very exhaustive) day brighter, thank you- I appreciate it!

-how have you been?

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cassiopeiasdaughter · 5 months

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the fact that we only have “herculean task” and “sisyphean task” feels so limiting. so here’s a few more tasks for your repertoire

icarian task: when you have a task you know you’re going to fail at anyways, so why not have some fun with it before it all comes crashing down

cassandrean task: when you have to deal with people you KNOW won’t listen to you, despite having accurate information, and having to watch them fumble about when you told them the solution from the start (most often witnessed in customer service)

feel free to chime in i ran out of ideas much faster than i anticipated

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cassiopeiasdaughter · 5 months

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Please do things to strengthen your attention span. It stresses me out so much when people just accept their small attention spans and cater to them without any acknowledgment that they are making it worse by doing that.

There is a reason attention spans are worse now and it didn’t just happen by chance. Media and the internet designed it that way and we went with it because it was easier.

Some of us with ADHD and brain fog need to meet ourselves where we’re at and lengthen our exercise span by watching a two minute video instead of a one minute video. Some of us need to sit down and read a novel with our phones turned off.

Wherever you’re at, just realize that not doing things that feel hard will keep making your attention span worse.

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cassiopeiasdaughter · 5 months

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the green elements and the rain really did it for me 🤭

thanks for the tag!

no pressure tags: @liarajoah @marina468 @talesofadragon @lucy-is-never-logical @patrophthia @berryzxx @vervainium

and everyone who sees this and wants to join!

pinterest aesthetic tag game!!

search [your name]+core on pinterest and post six pictures

thank you to @deathsholywaterr and @beardedjoel for tagging me 💞💞

tagging: EVERYONE! but also some buddies on my mind rn: @itty-bitty-baby-face @atticrissfinch @jbb-sgr @lumoverheaven @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin

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cassiopeiasdaughter · 5 months

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Sab, thank you for the tag! I really can't wait to read what you come up with.

"I kept thinking how it could have been me, and I hate myself for being this selfish, for not seeing the bigger picture. It’s survival instinct, I know, but I wish I could overcome it, ever since the war started I keep finding myself, wishing I was someone I’m not.

tagging, really anyone who wants to share their creation, but also:

@avalynlestrange , @patrophthia @earthgirl616 and @lucy-is-never-logical (its been a long time since I was tagged so please, do share more wips ❤️)

WIP tag game! Rules: Make a new post and post the latest line in your WIP & tag as many people as there are words (or as many as you feel like).

Thanks @hotgirleracas for the tag! 🖤 I'm still working on thee intersections of desire/isolation truck!fic (kneetouchnatural at this point), Astirism of a Ford F Series Pick Up.

He jerks away reflexively, and then with the careful precision of the slowly building heat, he eases his leg back over, until his knee and Cas' knee are lined up against eachother, knocking together whenever one of them shifts. It is probably a normal amount of touching, but he doesn't have a metric.

I know y'all have played already, but I'd love to get a lil update on anything else you've got in the works! @bloodydeanwinchester @ipromiseimawriter @luckshiptoshore (I know we *just* saw yours but I wanna see it again!)

Still don't have very many writing mutuals (that I'm aware of), so if you wanna repost and tag me I would love to read what you're working on!!! 🖤♠️

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cassiopeiasdaughter · 5 months

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this is mutual appreciation. if you receive this from me: i love you. thanks for being my mutual!!!

alsoo i hope life's treating you well!!

Right back at you ❤️❤️🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼

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cassiopeiasdaughter · 5 months

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dress

Theodore Nott x fem!reader

summary: New Year’s Eve, secret situationships and big declarations (angst with a happy ending)

A/N: slowly climbing out of my hole, be patient with me please...this was based on a fic request sent to me for my August celebration Theodore Masterlist

“So, what are you wearing tonight?” Your friends voice snap you out of your thoughts

“Huh?” You asked, turning your head to face her- Pansy.

Pansy Parkinson, is the prettiest- most intimidating witch you know. You went to school together, but never really talked. Well, until one rainy, very unfortunate evening. You had spent the afternoon by the lake- reading and thinking- alone as you liked to do while she -even though she denies it still- had been shagging a Ravenclaw prefect, at the same lake.

Said Ravenclaw, left her high and dry; running off to some astronomy club he had almost forgotten about, causing her to bump into you- as a storm broke out.

“Unbelievable.”, she huffed trembling on the way back to the castle - her clothes were muddy and wet, her hair disheveled and her shoes, once shiny and perfect were now absolutely ruined.

You didn’t dare bother her with talking, you instead opted for quietly listening to her righteous cries.

“I lost my necklace.”, she repeated over and over again under her breath, “It must have fallen off and now it’ll be buried under all the mud, my parents will kill me.”

Neither of you bothered saying goodbye to eachother once you stepped inside the castle, warm and dry and safe. You walked to your respective dorms and prepared yourself to pack this small- insignificant interaction with the all the small talks- and awkward conversations you’ve had with classmates over the years. But life was funny and you being the person that you are, found her necklace the next day and returned it to her.

“What do I owe you?”, she asked surprised and you laughed in return. That day, you earned a best friend for life, someone you could always count on, to have your back and keep you in check. Someone to laugh with and always share the good and the bad, this life has to offer.

“It’s New Years Eve, have you picked an outfit yet?” She asked again lowering the cup of coffee she’d been holding.

“Well, a dress I think- either the green one or the purple- the one with the bow-” You begun explaining but were quickly interrupted.

“The green one.” Theodore Nott said, drawing a small smile on your face- your eyes quickly searching for his.

Normally, you’d scoff at the comment- the audacity- you’d think to yourself. You aren’t someone that cares what other people think of you- not anymore at least. You don’t like asking for help, or advice. You like doing things your own way, you know yourself- way better than others like to think they do. And good Godric, you hate being interrupted, but Theodore- Theo gets a free pass. And you curse yourself at the realization.

You were classmates in Hogwarts, became friends thanks to Pansy, and then you just grew closer. How did everything happen? Well, that’s a story for another time. The important part is that he knows you- all of you and you him. He is the one person you’d sacrifice your alone time for, the one you anxiously wait for at night- he is the one and only person you peacefully sleep with at night, after exposing your body and soul to him. And you, well you hope you are all these in return for him. But you couldn’t possibly know that, because you were the one to come up with the rules for the thing you two have.

Casual, secret, no one gets hurt, we are friends above all.

A stupid coward you were, to think you’d be satisfied with just that. But you couldn’t take it back now, so you compromise and now, you kiss him after your friends have gone home, and you run out of bed before you get too comfortable and reality hits you hard like a punch in the stomach.

“Hate to agree with Nott, but he’s right, the green one looks great on you.” Pansy said unaware of the looks exchanged in front of her, of the lingering touches and innocent smiles.

“I’ll think about it.”

“I don’t understand why we can’t just go together, I am already here, my clothes are here, what’s the big deal?” You hear him ask, as you get ready together.

“The big deal is that I don’t want this to become a big deal.” You confess as you slowly turn around to face him.

“Ah- right.” He finally replies- his voice defeated and cold- distant. It’s no longer Theo- who speaks to you, but Theodore Nott, old classmate- mere acquaintance.

“You know what I meant, we…I-” You helplessly try to repair what you’ve broke, but soon you begin to realize that the other shoe the one you’ve been preparing yourself to drop, just did and there is no turning back now.

“I will see you later tonight” He begins to leave but pauses shortly to observe the clothes you’ve picked for tonight, laid out perfectly in a chair by the corner of the room “Not the green dress then? Pity, but you’ll look beautiful either way. You always do.”

With that, he leaves you alone in your room, confused and sad and irritated.

Confused because you can’t understand him, or his motives.

Sad; like you’ve just broken your favorite toy out of sheer stupidity and carelessness.

And irritated at yourself, for letting this turn into a big deal at the end.

“You don’t look very festive.” You hear Pansy say later that night, over the loud music, a glass of champagne in her hand and smudged lipstick, the same shade as the marks coating Neville Longbottoms neck.

“‘M tired, besides, you know, I don’t like big crowds.” You lie and finish of your drink as you scan the room for him.

Him, him, him. You haven’t seen him all night, you asked around but nothing. You suspect Blaise knows- something- from the way he talked to you, with disappointed brown eyes- staring down at you, judging you and your cold and foolish heart- always avoiding good things and ending up hurt by none other than yourself.

You aren’t even sure what you want to say to him now, what you are expecting to happen. You just want him to know how sorry you are, you just want to erase the image of him turning his back to you with hurt, from your brain.

And as you think all that, you finally spot him in a corner, surrounded by his- your- friends. He locks eyes with you the moment his head turns and he could just kill you right this moment, from how detached his stare is. That’s what you deserve, you suppose for treating him like he is disposable, insignificant; for wanting to hide him and what you have- as if you’re embarrassed of it- of him.

“Merlin you’re both idiots.” Pansy laughs behind you

You turn your head- stunned at her words. And, as you wait for her eyes to turn cold and scold you, Merlin, even yell at you for keeping this secret form her she surprises you with a hearty laugh and an arm on your shoulder, warming you- drawing you close.

“I don’t understand.” You laugh nervously and shake your head at her “How do you? Aren’t you mad? I…I-”

“What do you mean how? I am your best friend, I know you, no matter how hard you try to hide things from me, I’ll know and there isn’t much you can do about it.” She says with a smirk “Besides, I haven’t seen Nott this happy in a long time. So stop acting, trying to hide this thing you have and go be together. I am not going to be your new years kiss, Longbottom is waiting for me by the bar.”

“It's not an act, we had a fight, I think, I hurt him” You confess finally “I wanted to keep this secret, he didn’t and then I went on about not making it a big deal, when I want it to be a big deal, but I don’t think he does-”

You could hear your voice getting faster and faster, words mixing together but it didn’t matter because you had to get it all out now that you could and it felt like a running sink filling up a tub with water, ignoring the fact that a flood could destroy everything.

“Her, hey, slow down- breathe and then explain things, slower this time.” Her words ground you- like an anchor fighting with all its power to keep a ship from getting lost in a storm- even with the strongest tides coming its way.

“We agreed it was a casual thing, between the two of us, but it’s more than that for me. He doesn’t know, and-and in the process, I think, even if there were a part of him that wanted more, he doesn’t anymore. Because I-I have been so terrible, keeping secrets and running away the minute everything became too real. Maybe I’ve lost my chance.”

You hear her sigh and you think she agrees with you, it’s true, there is nothing you can do anymore, you lost the game.

“Do you see how miserable he is right now? How miserable he is every time you aren’t there with him? Stop talking to me, stop pitying yourself and go to him, just go- go, that’s an order.”

And with that she grabs your drink and shoves you away to his direction.

Your mind is blank and your mouth feels dry as you walk up to him and the way he eyes you up, surprised and curious slows your thinking even more.

“I went with the green dress.” You blurt out

“I can see that.” He replies nodding

An apology isn’t going to cut it you realize. Because not only, have you been acting like your secret with Theo was something that didn’t matter to you, something unimportant and stupid, it also made him feel insecure; as if there was something wrong with him- that you had to hide from everyone. Maybe you deserved this; I don’t want to make this a big deal you had said to him. But, really, he is worth it- he is a big deal to you.

“Dance with me?”

You extend your arm and hesitantly he takes it, leading you both to the dance floor.

“I am sorry.” You begin saying as you sway to the music, with his arms resting on your back and yours wrapped around his shoulders. “This is a big deal to me. I am sorry for acting like it wasn’t. I was really scared of putting all my feelings out there and ending up with nothing, but- but you are worth it. I am sorry for making you believe you weren’t.”

“You are a big deal to me too.” He replies after a while, his eyes are lit up now, like you’re used to them looking, warming your insides with just one look. He draws you in closer, as if holding on for dear life and his head dips slightly- wanting to take you all in. “So no more hiding?”

“No more, you can even make a big spectacle out of our one month anniversary if you’d like, I’ll mentally prepare myself.” You say and he laughs

“Noted.” He whispers in your ear “It’s almost New Year.”

You both stop moving and simply stare at eachother.

10, 9, 8

The room darkens and it feels as if you are the only people there.

7, 6, 5

Your heart warms at the though of spending this year with someone you love, actually love.

4, 3, 2

You stand on your tip toes and you smile at the man before you “I really love you.” You say to him

“Happy New Year.” You whisper and kiss him, savoring the Happy New Year, I love you too he whispers as your lips connect.

And once the party is over you return to your house laughing and singing to yourselves, whispering I love you, goodnight- for the first time to eachother, but certainly not the last.

reminder: English isn't my first language and I'm terribly sorry for mistakes; feedback and criticism are appreciated and needed

#theodore nott x reader #theodore nott #theodore nott imagine #theo nott x reader #theo nott #theo nott imagine #harry potter fanfiction #Theodore Nott flangst

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cassiopeiasdaughter · 7 months

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idk about you but i’m a sucker for the we just had sex and it’s the morning after and i woke up to an empty bed and how could i be so stupid of course you left me alone but wait you’re in my kitchen cooking me breakfast and i’m so relieved trope

#cries

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cassiopeiasdaughter · 7 months

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hey!

i was the ravenclaw who requested the ❤️

AND IT WAS PERFECT I LOVED IT!

ahhh im glad!!!!❤️❤️❤️❤️

#shipping

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cassiopeiasdaughter · 7 months

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hello!!!

could i get a ❤️ from your event?

a little about me:

im 5 ft tall and have very dark brown hair. its curly actually, it stops right near my armpits. as for my eyes, i have coffe brown doe and eyes. im a ravenclaw, second house slytherin.

i was always smarter than the kids in my grade, also alot more mature than them. im very shy when you first meet me but i will (try) to warm up to you if i haven’t already, and i do know how to hold a grudge.. if we become friends after something bad happens between us, i will always have that in my mind and i never forgot it and never will.

(im also an INFP)

as for my favorite artists, i listen to tv girl, arctic monkeys, clairo, and taylor swift.

my best subjects are english and history. all the rest im either HORRIBLE at or okay and have a passing grade in them.

i think thats all about me!

hi! thank u for writing this,

you are my last ship for this celebration, so I am going to take my sweet time and get you the perfect match.

Let's get started. You definitely have Slytherin traits, maybe you've been hurt in the past and that's why you hold grudges? I am guessing it's difficult for you to trust someone and you need them to prove themselves to you, before you can let your walls down and be yourself with them. So, you value loyalty in a relationship and trustworthiness. You want someone honest and true to their feelings and words. Maybe a Slytherin.

(btw, if someone does something to you that you don't like- tell them, don't push those feelings down and hold a grudge, for your own good- been there done that)

You sound like a sensitive person, who hides that, under thick skin, but in a relationship you'd want to feel comfortable enough to be soft and completely yourself around them.

Imagine, lying with your s/o and ranting about the Tudor dynasty or poets/writers you love and them listening with a smile on their face- no judgements, not bored, just fully inlove with you and every single thing about you. (goals)

I am going to ship you with my favorite boy Theodore Nott for the following reasons:

A very loyal babe, who looks tough but is a softie

Also, very smart, and he'd both be impressed by your brain but he would also impress you with his knowledge and motivate you to be the best version of yourself

Your study dates would be so so good and peaceful, I'm kinda jealous

He just matches your energy, for some reason and you just have to trust me on this, since I'm a love expert.

Lastly, imagine you and Theo traveling the world and visiting every single museum there is. Hand in hand. Spending hours in silence marveling the beautiful things humans can create when they put differences aside, and focus on the good.

tell me what you think babe, have a great day!

sorry for any typos!

#shipping

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cassiopeiasdaughter · 7 months

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HEY THIS MAY SOUND SO DUMB but can i request theo nott with a reader who has a cat and theo loves it to death and treats it like his own child?😭😭 even better if its a kitten!!! thanks 🤍🤭

A/N: I blame @patrophthia for this

Do not think about you and Theo, walking around London one night, with your arm looped around his, bodies close- warming eachother

Do not think about the way his voice would sound in your hair, telling you a joke or a dream he had and you listening closely- saying something making him laugh in return

Do not think about, how his head would suddenly whip around to the sound of a small kitten on the side of the street, lost and afraid

Do not think about him freezing at the side of the precious cat and then you running after it, taking it in your arms and begging Theo to rescue it

“We can’t get a cat, besides, what if it already has an owner.”

Do not think about the look his face would make at your pouting and begging and then the tired sigh he would let out before agreeing to take the cat in

“I am not good with animals, you should know that.”

Do not think about “not good with animals Theodore Nott” watching you bottle-feed the kitten- which refuses to eat, causing you immediate panic and exhaustion “What are we going to do?”, you’d ask and he’d hate the way you looked and sounded -defeated and scared.

“Let me try”, he’d offer

Do.Not.Think about Theo Nott, the tallest man you know holding a tiny kitten in his arms and a bottle- patiently waiting for the kitten to open it's mouth and take a sip, which it would eventually do. The look of happiness and awe on your face would make him proud. And the sight of the kitten eating, finally, thanks to him would make him prouder.

Do not think about Theo always being the one to feed your kitten, Cinnamon- a girl, or give her the medicine, she was prescribed.

Do not think about Theo with a larger and healthy Cinnamon on his lap, purring and lightly scratching him, while he pets her head gently, smiling down at her.

Do not think about Cinnamon, running to him- rubbing her head against his legs, whenever you two return to your house, “Forget about the fact that I begged him to save you.”, you say pretending to be annoyed, because in all honesty how could you?

Do not think about finding Theo asleep on the couch with Cinnamon on his chest

And lastly, do not think about Theo whispering to Cinnamon about how he wants to propose to you, showing her his mothers ring- a family heirloom he has been waiting to give you for the longest time.

#theodore nott x reader #theodore nott #theo nott #theo nott x reader #Theo Nott fluff #fluff

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cassiopeiasdaughter · 7 months

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mirrorball

Theodore Nott x fem!reader

warnings: language, mentions of stress and an existential crisis? not proofread

summary: you are stressed and tired from being the one that takes care of everyone, and a concerned Slytherin boy wants to help

this was requested by @lalalenka and Paula 💛 for my celebration Theodore masterlist

When did life get so heavy? When did play dates turn into study sessions? When did begging your mom to check for monsters under your bed, turn into you crying into your pillow over your worries and fears? When did reality start feeling so real?

You think about that often, especially at nights, when your friends are asleep and you can remove the mask you wear, the face of happiness and optimism. You don’t have to play the part of the person who has everything under control when you are alone, you can be yourself, lost and afraid.

You are currently sitting in the Great Hall, waiting for your friends to come down for breakfast, start yet another busy day together. You woke up earlier today, exam season is coming up and sleep is something you struggle with, during those times. You know, your friends always wake up too late, that’s why you’ve grabbed their favorite pastries from the breakfast table, so you can hand them later on your way to class. It’s peaceful like this, sipping your coffee alone, planning your day as you eat; quietly going over everything you need to do-

“Are you alright?”, you hear a voice interrupting you from your thoughts

It’s Theodore Nott, you realize as you raise your head. Theodore, Theo is not a friend of yours. He is a boy from your year, a Slytherin, that you occasionally talk to during class.

You see him at the library almost everynight, you two are always the last ones to leave. Your study dates, as you like to call them, began during 5th year; when you were hunched over a tome of Arithmancy begging yourself to understand, what the passage in front of you was saying, but failing miserably. That’s when you felt his hand on your shoulder, asking, if you accidentally cast a spell on yourself.

“I can’t understand anything.”, you remember whining and he spent the night tutoring you. You offered him help in DADA, in return and you ended up studying together for your OWLs. You like to think that you passed with good grades thanks to him, but he doesn’t agree.

Theo, is someone you feel calm and safe enough around to not fake your feelings or thoughts, most of the times, at least. Again, he isn’t your friend, but he isn’t a stranger or a mere acquaintance either. What he is exactly, that you can’t answer.

“I’m fine, why?”, you reply looking at him confused

“You’ve run out of bread for your butter.”, he says taking a seat across from you.

You stare down and see that you’ve been spreading butter on a slice of bread for so long that you’ve made a hole in the middle, with crumbs all over your plate.

Before, you can say or do anything he places a large piece of toast in front of you, with butter and blueberry jam, just how you like it.

“See you later.”, he calls out as he leaves, not giving you the time to thank him.

You spend breakfast with a smile on your face, your day suddenly feeling warmer and brighter.

“Goodmorning!”, you hear your best friend singing, while she wraps her arms around you and takes a seat.

“Morning to you too.”, you say laughing and hand her her favorite chocolate cake the one that always runs out first.

“What would I do without you?”, she says cheeks stuffed and crumbs falling everywhere- a sight that makes you laugh and always reminds you how much you love her.

“Probably still wandering around the forbidden forest.”, you say laughing, and cutting a corner from her cake

“That was ages ago, please let it go.”

“Never, now come on, we’ll be late.”, you giggle at her protests and drag her to class.

Theo isn’t brave or daring, if he were, his friends wouldn’t be giving him such a hard time about his crush and his approach, the lack of action mainly.

“You keep going like that, you won’t be in the friend zone, you’ll be in the study buddy zone, which is far force.”, Blaise warned him. But what was he to do about that? You had different friend groups and your schedules didn’t match. Was he supposed to just ask you to Hogsmeade out of the blue?

“Yeah so this is the proper movement for the spell, now what are you doing Saturday?”, no way would he ever say that.

“Yeah, you’ll be associated with Ancient Runes Theo, no one finds that hot.”, Pansy commented- to which he responded with an eye roll.

“Maybe, I don’t want to do something about it.”, he said to his friends

“Keep pining then.”, Draco replied

“Maybe I will.”, and with that he stood up and left, wanting to take a walk and clear his thoughts, ignore his friends and their unfortunately correct but not practical opinions. It was fine, he would get over it and he would be fine.

He would not be fine, he told himself as soon as he saw you, second time for today; laughing with your friends- pestering them to drink water- running around with bottles in your hands.

His eyes light up by the way you giggle as you talk to them, maybe you are telling a story- he can’t understand, but your gestures and facial features- the way you look; alive and loud and beautiful, they send shocks down his spine.

He knows it’s cheesy and stupid, but to him you are the sun. You are warm to others, always making your friends laugh- you take care of them, sometimes to the point of neglecting yourself. But, you are loving and kind and you light up any place you step into. It’s a shame, really, because he is nothing like the sun- he is dark and reserved, but still, your light doesn’t blind him, it could never.

“Hi Theo.”, you wave as he passes by, in a much better mood than you were this morning and he waves back with a smile, taking longer strides to leave your eyesight and maybe hide in a broomcloset?

It was getting really late and you were still in the library studying. You had so much homework and revising to do, and at some point you needed to tutor third years and prepare for dueling battles. Everything was too much, and you had no one to help you. You didn’t know how to ask your friends for help, you’d spent the past six years being the responsible one- the mom friend, you had everything under control and cared for others. The roles couldn’t be reversed now. But, it made you feel so alone, the alienation adding another weight on your chest.

“Hey.”, you hear Theo’s voice, in a soft whisper and raise your head to look at him, his books are closed and stacked in front of him, signaling he is getting ready to leave.

You spent all afternoon studying together, and it had started fine- you felt productive for the first hour, but after a while, words had stopped making sense.

“It’s really late, do you want to leave the rest for tomorrow?”

“I have one chapter left, you don’t have to wait for me, g-goodnight.”, you dismiss him with a smile

But he doesn’t leave and you look at him with eyebrows raised high.

“One chapter.”, he whispers innocently lightly holding his hands in front of him, before he opens up a book, pretending to study.

You scoff at that and lower your head once more, to the passage in front of you. Letters are dancing in the page taunting you- catch us, they say, try to make sense of this. You are tired and Theo looking at you, concerned, isn’t helping your brain focus. You wait five, maybe seven minutes before you let out a quiet groan and say, “Fine, lets go.”, meeting Theo and the stupid satisfied look on his face.

The way back to your dorm is quiet, you are both tired from schoolwork and the lack of sleep is another crack on the mask you wear near others. You bite down at your lip nervously, as you think all of the work you didn’t get done, and all the extra homework you’ll have to finish tomorrow. You think of your friends and the parties they are begging you to go to and the Hogsmeade outings you’ve missed due to being exhausted. You think of their grades and how easy it is for them to succeed, while you spend hours in the library and still fail. You think about the future and how you don’t know what you want it to look like, and you think about life and how small you seem compared to the world.

You don’t feel the tears that slide down your cheeks, or the water in your eyes- blocking your sight. You understand you’re crying, only when a sob escapes your mouth, one that has been begging to come out for the longest time. After that, it is inevitable for you to break down, not caring about Theo and what he’ll think of you, or about the prefects who’ll come running thinking there’s been an accident in the hallways. But he calls your name, and that ruins you even more.

“‘M sorry.”, you whine- crying and turn your body away from him, lowering yourself on the ground wishing you could disappear.

“What is it? Is it that stupid Potions chapter? I’ll help you with that, don’t cry over that.”, he says panicking, kneeling behind you.

“No, no, it’s not- it’s everything. It’s all too much.”

“What is?”, he asks calmly, placing a hand on your shoulder hesitantly- you don’t tense at his touch, your body relaxes and you turn around- your face wet and red staring at him.

“Everything; school, life, everything.”, you whimper, “I have so much to do, but I can’t- I can’t. And everyone expects me to have everything under control, but I don’t, and I can’t do it anymore.”, you exclaim placing your head in the palm of your hand.

“No one expects you to have everything under control, it’s- it’s impossible to do.”

“Yes, they do! If I am not there for everyone, if I let them see how lost I feel, they-”

“They'll what? Leave you?”, he asks shaking his head at what you’re saying

“No, yes, maybe, I don’t know. They won’t be able to handle it- I am sure.”

“Even if that were true.”, he says slowly, releasing your head from your hands, urging you to look at him, “If you can’t let your friends see, then you can show me. You can talk to me, don’t keep all that inside. There are enough self-sacrificing idiots in the Gryffindor Tower, we don’t need one more.”, he jokes and you let out a small laugh

“Why would you want to be bothered with my issues?”

“I- you, you don’t have to always be the person who cares for everyone, you can-should be the one cared for.”

“Why?”, you ask again, the air shifting between you into something different. Something that moves the pain from your chest and turns it into butterflies in your stomach.

“Ah- well-“, he let’s out a breath, “- because I- I like spending time with you, and I want to be there for you, besides, I can handle anything you shoot at me.”, he finishes; his face red and sweaty.

You have stopped crying now, your vision is still blurry and your breath uneven- but something inside you has changed. As if, a bright light has found it’s way inside, providing hope and something new- something you haven’t felt before, but desperately want to keep.

“Thank you.”, you say softly and let him help you up, you two resuming your walk but with a different destination this time.

“Come.”, he says and offers his hand- which you gladly take, letting him guide you wherever.

You walk outside, and let the cool air hit you- ground you. It’s late at night, you are at Hogwarts, near the lake, you are at your 7th year and next to you, stands Theodore Nott, your study partner Theo. The Slytherin boy- that looks handsome but has no clue, the brilliant Theo, who always helps you out and is willing to listen. Theo, who is still holding your hand while pointing at stars and constellations with his other. Theo, who smells like pine and fireplace, as you lean against him and listen to his voice. Theo, who you can count on and thanks to whom you know it will be okay. Everything will be okay.

A/N: life will be okay with or without Theo Nott, you all deserve to be happy and loved, just needed to remind y'all :)

Theo taglist: @avalynlestrange @spacecadet16 @lucy-is-never-logical @aleviia @marina468 @annaisabookworm @liarajoah @notasadgirlipromise @pariseffer @unlikelysadgirl @ktz-bb @lizisthecoolest

#theodore nott #theodore nott x reader #theodore nott imagine #theo nott #theo nott imagine #theo nott x reader #theodore nott fluff #Theodore Nott hurt/comfort #fluff #hurt/comfort

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cassiopeiasdaughter · 7 months

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the idea of Theodore nott having a cat is driving me a little crazy actually

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cassiopeiasdaughter · 7 months

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like the moon loves the earth

Tom Riddle x fem!reader

summary: in which Tom is dragged out of bed in the middle of the night, because he is a simp to help his friend, deliver a hippogriff. (based on a request from anon)

main masterlist

Tom was dreaming, or actually having a nightmare. He felt cold and the world around him was dark. There were strange faces looking at him, calling him Dark Master or Lord, he doesn’t remember now, his attention is on the school- his school- around him, on fire and in ruins. Children and teachers are screaming and running around and he…he-

He wakes with a gasp and later a scream, at the first thing he sees; a pair of wide eyes staring deeply at him.

“Quiet!”, you whisper and cover his mouth with your hand “Are you mental? You’ll wake everyone.”

His eyes widen at the realization, of you in his room and not a terrible monster that has spilled from his dream into the real world.

“What?”, he asks confused as he removes your hand lightly

“I think you were having a bad dream.”, you whisper

“How did you know? Was I screaming in my sleep?”

“Ah no. I came here for something else.”, you reply awkwardly- twirling your hair in your fingers innocently.

He had to control himself and not smile, at that. Truth was, that you and Tom had been good friends for a few years now. You did almost everything together; almost, because you like animals and he doesn’t. More specifically, you will head off to the forest at times, care for the creatures there, spend time with them or just observe them. He loves that about you, how soft you’ll turn around magical creatures, how protective you are and how caring.

He loves many things about you; he loves your voice and how it sounds when you laugh at his jokes. He loves your expression, the one you make when you try to keep up with his long talks about magic and life. He loves how you don’t care about the whys and the what ifs whatsoever, but still pay attention to him and his existential worries. He loves you, but will never tell you.

And now, you are in his room at night, wanting to tell him something. Will that be a confession? A demand for you two to not be just friends anymore? Would you kiss-

“Bobbi is in labour.”, you rushed out worried ,“You need to come and help.”

“Uhh- what?”, he asked in confusion- trying to ignore the pain in his chest.

“Come on, we don’t have time, the baby could be out any minute.”

“The baby?”

“Yes! Bobbis baby- egg actually. Did you not hear what I said? Come on, up we go.”, you pushed the covers off and threw a few of his clothes on him.

“Who in the name of bloody Salazar, is Bobbi?”

“Bobbi, the hippogriff, she is pregnant- was actually. Come on!”, you whispered loudly, waiting for him impatiently with your hands on your hips and your eyebrows raised. If you were together, Tom would plant a kiss on your lips and maybe drag you back to sleep; but you weren’t and that is why, as he told himself, he got out of bed.

“Wouldn’t it be better if- I don’t know- a professor helped Bobbi, instead of us?”, he asked- as he put on his clothes, after spinning you around so you wouldn’t face him.

“Tsk.”, you let out “Bobbi doesn’t trust them, she trusts us.”

“She trusts you, you mean”

“Only, because she hasn’t met you yet, you should join me more often when I visit her.”

“I don’t see why.”, he lies- he would join you if it meant spending more time with you, but it would still be hopeless.

“For starters, you could leave your dorm- and the library does not count.”, you lifted your finger towards him and he snorted

“And, you and Bobbi are alike-”

“In, uh- what way exactly?”, he asked fully dressed now and ready to leave with you

“Well, you both seem grumpy and scary, but in reality- you are way too soft.”

Only around you, he wanted to finish, but wouldn’t dare to, instead he walked over to the door, lightly bumping your shoulder on his way out, “Come on then, Poppy is waiting.”

“Bobbi!”, you said laughing and ran after him.

Bobbi had indeed been waiting, and in obvious pain, as she lay down on her side- letting out screams and cries. You quickly run to her side- kneeling by her and running soothing circles on her beak with your fingers.

“It’s going to be alright, sweet girl.”, you whispered in a tone that made Tom’s heart swell and slow down his breathing. With hesitant steps, he walked over to you two, kneeling quietly behind you- releasing a hiss from the frightened hippogriff in front of him.

“Maybe, I should go.”, he whispered cautiously trying to maintain eye contact with the creature

“Stay where you are! Bow and you’ll be fine.”

Mumbling an annoyed “Shouldvegonetobed” under his breath, he listened to you and slowly- without breaking eye contact, bowed to Bobbi, who gave him a less suspicious stare now. It took a few seconds, but they felt like many agonizing hours to Tom, for the poor creature to lightly bow in return, proving she approved of him and was willing to trust him.

It wasn’t the bow he earned that melted his heart, washed his stress away- no- it was your hand clasping his and the smile you beamed at him, a thank you and an I told you so all in one.

He didn’t have enough time to savor the feeling, a scream whipped both your heads away from eachother, turning your attention to the animal in front of you.

“What do we do now?”, he asked anxiously

“Well, I- I don’t know, I figured you’d come up with something.”, you replied anxiously- moving closer to the animal, touching her beak in a comforting manner

“How on Earth, would I know how to help hippogriff in labor, this is the first one I’ve seen up close.”, he whispered loudly, doing his best to not cause nay more stress to poor Bobbi, who’d now curled up even further into herself.

“I don’t know Tom, you always think of something.”, you said back, looking at him with open eyes, vulnerable and honest and scared. He wanted more than anything to wipe that look off your face, comfort you- fight every single one of your fears and worries, so he could see you smile at him, once more.

“Alright, alright.”, he said, mostly to himself while taking a deep breath, “First, let’s cast a warming charm, I-I spotted the calming roots we learned about last week in herbology, you remember which ones?”

“Yeah, yeah.”, you replied collecting yourself- “The ones with a little yellow at the tips?”

“Exactly, I saw some a few feet behind, can you fetch some? And water, also?”, he said rolling up his sleeves and casting a Lumos so he could see clearer.

You tossed your bag at his feet, “There’s a bottle in the front pocket.”,you said running to pick some of the roots he told you about.

The moment you ran away anxiety crashed him, his hands felt sweaty and unsteady and he drew a shaky breath staring at the poor creature, folded and in visible pain, whimpers and cries falling from her mouth, “I did not ask for this.”, he said earning a loud whine from Bobbi.

“You are right, sorry.”, he replied, “We can do this, come on.”, moving closer and transfigurating leaves and mud into a blanket for her.

“I am here.”, he heard your voice from afar, running breathless with a stack of leaves and flowers and anything that resembled the roots you looked for.

“Here-“, you handed him the roots, “-I also picked up these.”, you placed a few flowers on his lap-

He started at you for a few seconds with confused eyes, and red color creeping up on his cheeks, staining them.

“For the taste…of the potion.”, you added

“Ah, yeah, of course.”, he shook his head and began brewing a potion to calm the poor hippogriff and ease her pain, make the situation easier and faster. He felt your hand gripping his shoulder, tightly, when you heard Bobbi scream and toss around, and if it weren’t for the terrible circumstances, he swears his heart would have stopped.

Tom Riddle has felt relief, many times in his life. Moving to Hogwarts is a memorable one, you telling him that you would never date the annoying Hufflepuff prefect- another special to him. But, this exact moment, watching Bobbi, curled around her egg- with you by his side, resting your head on his shoulder and sniffling quietly with your arms wrapped around his, this moment; he is sure, he’ll remember and cherish forever.

“Thank you.”, you whisper on the way back to the castle, “I can always count on you. I- I can trust you and you are always there for me. Thank you, really.”

You squeeze his hand. His fingers are growing sweaty and hot as each moment passes. You must have realized by now- what you mean to him. How you affect him; how he’ll always follow you, like the Moon orbits the Earth, at all times. Every night it shines for the Earth, like he would for you- if you asked him to. Maybe it’s the moon that shines bright tonight, or the sentimental- vulnerable moment that passed, or maybe it is all the years of pining that have piled up and can’t be contained anymore.

“You know why I did it, don’t you?”, he stops abruptly , “I would do anything for you, anything you ask of me- it’s yours. For Merlins sake I- I would hatch a dragons egg for you!”

He stares at your expression; mouth slightly open- eyes focused on him, playing with your rings nervously. Nervous, you are nervous. Probably thinking of a way to let him down gently, because you are kind like that, you try to please everyone- make everyone happy, sacrificing in result your needs, but he won’t stand for that, especially not now.

“Sorry, forget it”, he says and takes quick steps away from you- wanting more than anything to hide under his blankets and pillows.

As he contemplates every decision he’s made in his life and tries to think of anything more stupid than his confession, right now, he doesn’t hear you running behind him shouting his name annoyed.

“Would you just, wait one second!”, you grab his hand and turn him- to face you, “You are so annoying when you act like this.”

“Like what?”,

“Like a complete self-pitying know-it-all-”, you shout, “Excuse me.”, he interrupts but you continue, “-it’s bloody annoying, especially when-” you stop and let out an exasperated breath at his ignorance; eyes looking at you innocently and blush all over his cheeks. He wanted to ask, “when what?”, but you let out a sound that reminded him of Bobbis groans and grabbed his tie- lowering him to you, smashing your lips to his.

It took him a few moments to realize what was happening, and then a few more to convince himself that he wasn’t imagining this and you were in fact kissing him. And boy, when he was convinced he kissed you like his life depended on it.

His arms wrapped around your body, keeping you close to him, fearing you’d slip away. But your hands pulling at his collar, and playing with his buttons assured him there would be no slipping away, not tonight and hopefully not ever.

He smiles at your lips as you part from him, both of you in need of air as you take deep breaths.

“I would hatch a dragons egg for you too.”, you say quietly and intertwine your fingers, kissing his knuckles as he grins down at you. “Don’t look at me like that.”, you say blushing and then prompt him to move, walk back to the castle with you, “Come on, we have to wake up early tomorrow and help Bobbi with her egg.”

“Of course we do.”, he says tucking you to him, with his arm wrapped around your shoulder, as he gives your hair a kiss.

At this exact moment, Tom Riddle doesn’t feel relieved or content. This feeling can’t compare to anything, not to the satisfaction a perfectly curated potion brings him and neither to the sweet peace he feels as his head lands on his pillows on Friday nights. No, right now he feels joy and that counts for so much more than he ever thought it would.

A/N: sorry for any mistakes! feedback & criticism are very very appreciated

#tom riddle x reader #tom riddle x you #tom riddle au #he isn't evil #just grumpy #ok?#sunshine x grumpy #tom riddle fluff #tom marvolo riddle #tom riddle

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