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The Fellowship of the Ring, J.R.R. Tolkien

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Every PF2 Class Really Really Fast

Alchemist: You make free comsumables. Make some in the morning. Make the rest as you go throughout the day. Throw unfinished goop if you don't have the time to make stuff.

Barbarian: Get super angry for bonus damage and durability.

Bard: Cast occult spells. Spend that third action singing or attacking.

Champion: Enemies... can attack your allies?! UNACCEPTABLE.

Cleric: Cast divine spells. And an obnoxious amount of healing. Or harming, whatever, I'm not your dad. If your deity has cool domains, use that. If your diety has a cool weapon, use that.

Druid: Cast Primal spells, it's like the best parts of the Arcane and Divine lists combined. Yes, you can turn into animals if you want. There's also non-animal options if you'd prefer.

Fighter: Choose your favorite weapon type, you get +2 to hit with it. Don't get used to it or it'll poison you for every other martial in the game.

Gunslinger: You're fighter but you've been assigned guns instead of getting to choose. Crit fish harder. That +2 is still addictive if you're not careful.

Inventor: Make a custom machine for murdering your enemies. Murder your enemies with it. Spontaneous combustion is always an option.

Kineticist: You are an elemental blaster superhero.

Magus: Sword+Spell=a LOT of damage. Hey, you read up on the action economy first, right?

Monk: Punch people 500 times. You're more durable butt naked than the fighter is in full plate.

Oracle: Cast divine spells. Build up your curse to make things get *~Wacky~*.

Psychic: Spell slots are for people who can't cast enough cantrips.

Ranger: Choose one man. Kill he

Rogue: Flank people. Splat people.

Sorcerer: Choose your spell list. Get perks for casting granddad's favorite spells.

Summoner: You share your health with your pet hypermurder machine. Hey, you read up on the action economy first, right?

Swashbuckler: You can kill anyone so long as you look sufficiently cool doing it.

Thaumaturge: You've figured out what the enemy is weak to! It's you.

Witch: Choose your spell list. Free cat.

Wizard: Cast arcane spells. Play legos with spell slots.

NEW! Exemplar: What superpower do you want for this round?

NEW! Animist: The ghosts say that if you cast divine spells they'll cast primal spells for you.

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Types of players I really enjoy running games for

Players who write extensive backstories. Provided they're willing to work with me to make sure their story fits into the lore for my setting, I love hearing all about their OC's personal history. I live for the drama and the passion and enjoy finding ways to work it into my campaign.

Players who do voices. I love it when people get into character and try and bring some theatricality to the table. I admire their commitment and the courage it takes to perform.

Players who cleverly use the mechanics for teamwork. It's always satisfying when a player strives for system mastery, but it's particularly pleasing to me to see a player that is able to take advantage of the mechanics to produce strong synergy with the other players. I love rewarding this kind of play.

Players who fail graciously. I love it when a player sees a critical fumble as an opportunity for drama or comedy instead of something to be avoided at all costs. This is what it looks like to be a good sport.

Players who match my vibes. I really appreciate it when a player reads the room and plays their their character accordingly. Who is silly when I want to be silly and serious when I want to be serious and supports me in building and maintaining an engaging atmosphere.

Players who pay attention. I am so grateful when players let me finish my narration and take notes and connect the dots.

Inexperienced but enthusiastic players. It's so much fun running for people who are new to the game. I love being the one to introduce them to this hobby and show them how much fun it can be. Most of the time, their excitement more than makes up any awkwardness that comes with learning the game.

There are probably some things I'm forgetting, but this post is getting long enough as it is. You all are a delight and I love having you at my table.

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So apparently on twitter there's a whole thing going on where anti-woke Warhammer fans performatively stormed out by declaring that they were going to play the horror-themed WWI wargame Trench Crusade instead, only to be mass-banned from its discord because the moderators didn't want a bunch of paleocon trolls stinking up the place.

The thing that blows my mind isn't just that they thought the thoroughly subversive Trench Crusade was positive Christian rep, but that they thought Warhammer 40,000 was. The setting where the messiah is explicitly dead and rotting and was an anti-religion crusader in life. Meanwhile Warhammer Fantasy's Sigmar is much more Thor than Jesus. A lot of conservative evangelicals and tradcaths seem to fall into liking straight up pagan gods if they have a sufficiently macho and traditionalist (western European) aesthetic.

Honestly, this is beyond media illiteracy, it's just straight-up blindness. Obliviousness beyond even the people who think Robocop and Starship Troopers are gung-ho pro-American action movies. Now I'm left to wonder how many fans of the Blasphemous game series are passionate reactionary Christians who get the happy feelings from the aesthetics and totally ignore the story and themes.

Still, I am glad to have learned about Trench Crusade through this, looks like a cool game. Aesthetic and themes kind of remind me of the Trench Foot/Countrycide mod for Doom (which, granted, started off as a Warhammer 40K mod...).

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leave your laundry on the floor for them

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❤️

This comic is from Our Super Adventure Volume 2: Video Games and Pizza Parties!

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Idk am I doing this right

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a quickie to say happy new years!! ⭐ they're based on those fireworks LED lights

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I wish you a happy new year 2024!!!

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Some #darkestdungeon looking thing. Of course a necromancer would work on pigs at some point

I am going back through my archives to post and collect content that I might have missed. Indeed I never posted a compilation of my remastered Slaughterhouse Horrors here. So here you go.

You can find the full PDF for free on my patreon!

Check out patreon[dot]com/dmtuz for more content!

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Dans ses yeux - In his eyes

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Dan Hays Colorado Snow Effect 4 (with detail) 2007, oil on canvas

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Fixing the T'au empire part 2

So, in the first part I explained how the T'au were fine as they were, because their relatively hopeful outlook on the galaxy shone bright in contrast of the rest of the setting, how that turn the rest of the setting even darker, and how I love the idea that the solution to the Galaxy's problem is a truly different, alien approach to our individualist societies.

However, I have come to realize something, a reason as to why the T'au Empire may not feel at home in the 40k universe, and I thought about it by watching Indiana Jones 4, so sacrifices have been made.

The T'au Empire is not mythological.

The 40k is not a sci-fi setting, it is a dark fantasy setting with guns. And part of what makes the grandiosity of it is how mythologized every faction is. And I do not speak about religion, I speak of myths as in the stories we, right now, tell ourselves are the foundations of the world, the archetypes of what is and is not.

The Imperium incarnates the various mythologies of vast empires. Alexander the Great, Genghis Khan, the British Empire, vast swats of lands combining different people united by righteousness and oppression. And also how all those empires fell. It's the idea of "things were better before" (even when they were not). Moreover, the equipment used by this faction is deliberatly old, centuries old, technology is religiously taken care of, weapons are blessed, vehicles are passed down from generation to generation. It is all very old, marked with that myths of the old Empire on its last leg.

The Orks are the Barbarians At the Gate, the savages who relish only destruction, like Attila the Hun, but british. In truth, it's not like barbarians actually existed, those were just foreign countries, but the myth is there.

The Tyranids are the Monsters in the Dark.

The Craftworld Eldars are the Atlanteans, the Utopians, the Babelians, the Old Civilization who fell due to their own hubris, and is now a superior people with no place to call home and no way back their transgression.

The Dark Eldars are the Feys of old, trolls, goblins, fairies stealing children in the night, playing cruel and horrific pranks, eating people. And following them to their home is a death sentence.

The Chaos is the Evil of Man, the primordial sin, the dark part of Humanity that eats itself to death, self destructive and perverse (They should have western dragons, that would fit them).

The Necrons are Death, or at least they try. They are like the Craftworld Eldars in a sense, but in a more Inevitable return way.

But the T'au? They do not fit any myth, in fact they specifically are immune to myths and the Warp. They are no none-sense, they do not play by any rule. As they were written, they would be better as a recurring joke than a faction. Everything about them is bright new, from theme to lore, and it makes them feel shallow.

There is one exception to that, and that is Farsight, who fit the myth of the Virtuous Rebel, an archetype that is not really coined by any faction as far as I know. In a way, he could also be kind like King Arthur, with his magic blade and his knights around him, but the clash of eastern/western reference hide this interpretation of him.

So... how to fix it? Modern problems requires modern myths.

As I said, myths are not about what is actually old, myths are always modern, visions we have right now about the past. So what Myth could fit the T'au Empire? I think we must look to a very modern work of literature: The SCP Foundation. A collective work written like articles depicting how an advanced and secret organization captures, study, and contains supernatural entities. They are much like the Men in Black, or the government in X-Files. They gain they mythology not through what they are, but what they deal with.

I think we should make the T'au Empire's main armies kinda fade in the background and focus on an organisation within the the T'au Empire that would approach the other mythological faction with a saavy appraoch based on tech to contain and use the horrors back at the horrors. A cold scalpel who knows what they are dealing with, knows they are outmatched, and use secrecy, focused efforts, and unconventional tactics to deal with it. The T'au Empire already have the foundation for it, they are technologically advanced, learn from their mistakes, and have authoritarian ruling cast shrouded in mystery.

They could pop up bio/cyber/solar-punks units, highly specialised and modified modern soldiers. Not the WW1 Kriegsmen, not the WWII Cadians, not the Catachan Rambos, not the Angelic Space Marines. People, with modern, recognizable equipment, turning to extremes in order to deal with demons, and civilizations using farming equipment more ancient than their prehistory.

In that perspective, the T'au main armies would kind of become the background, the necessary fight force to win actual battles and hold ground. Their stories could develop nicely on their own until they become established enough to have their own mythos. But the main event would be the Secret Cadre, the Black ops, the Foundation, the Men In Black of the T'au Empire, using not ancient techs and beliefs against demons like the Inquisition does, but developing Reality anchors of their own, sending modified Tyranid viruses into the other faction, using Soul Traps to capture and send daemons to corrupt enemy tanks.

Fire warriors spawned from tyranids biopools, weapons build by engineers trapped in time distortion to produce more advanced stuff faster, ships recycled from Space Hulks...

To mythologize the T'au, the T'au must, I believe, become Myth users to become Myth Breakers.

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i dont think ive put motivational sloster.mp4 on tumblr yet

also a gif version