chaoticlawfulsarcasm - Tumblr blog

[chaoticlawfulsarcasm]

All im saying is i have spent all of my teenage years as depressed as anyone in mental asylums would have been in the 50s and back then you ask a kid what the future is like and they talk about all this flying cars and stuff like nah i dont even believe i can make it long enough in the ecological hellstorm to wish for a house in the future i just want to make it to 40 honestly like is that too much to ask for

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The letter "S" is like the 2 of the alphabet

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This has been my night so far and perfectly describes my day

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My girlfriend almost broke up with me for biting a twizzlers without peeling it, just straight up bit into it

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I really have to pay to see and some of yall dont experience this, so to the freeloaders of the group, get a job you sacks of flour

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How do some people wake up and just go about their life without anxiety, it's so wild

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Seventeen

The first and last song I listened to when I was 17 was Dancing Queen because of that one really shit post I read about a week before I turned 17. It was the last time I remember having a decent memory

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WOOPS

Playing HighE on the treble clef is all fun and games until you realize you are playing tuba and you accidentally start a new school record. I play Euphonium help me.

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What am I to do

My parents: You should go to sleep at 20:45

Me: That aint gon happen i got da work de home

My parents @ 23:30: What the heck are you still doing awake i told you to sleep

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CMinds

“This is calm and it’s doctor” ~ Dr. Spencer Reid

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oldest child and i love black coffee but tea is also amazing so im torn

is being into coffee an older sibling thing bc everyone i know who loves coffee is the oldest child

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lemons

My blog has so far been 75% about lemons and 25% about supernatural

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Happy Birthday to Arrow and Zeppelin, the only set of twins we will ever have 😅 👶🏻👶🏻❤️ 🎪 Special thanks to Yuli, who I am completely convinced must moonlight as a party planner.. #birthday #twins #circuspartyA post shared by ᴅᴀɴɴᴇᴇʟ ᴀᴄᴋʟᴇs (@danneelackles512) on Dec 2, 2018 

[chaoticlawfulsarcasm]

Life Gave Me Lemons

People say life never gives you lemons but last night I was walking down the street and I saw something fly across the street right toward me. Out of reaction I just punted that little shit and I hear the guy across the street yell “No you dope that was meant for the guy next to you.” Long story short the lemon was infused with heroin and I stopped a drug deal by accident. I love my town.

[chaoticlawfulsarcasm]

OneTime

One time I ate an entire lemon without chewing because someone told me I couldn't. I just shoved that sucker right down my throat. And after eating the lemon I looked him dead in the eyes and said “your child is next.” He just about had a heart attack and I didn't have the self-control to hold back my laughter as he ran off.