cheshirekitty

[cheshirekitty]

just sliding in to let you guys know, I have no idea when I’ll get the urge to write part two of the Scaramouche angst.🥹 I AM SORRY!! I’ll try to keep it in mind, it’ll probably take a few days for my brain to even process what to write…

[cheshirekitty]

Balladeer angst?!

authors note: I’ve never actually wrote a good angst so my apologies if this sounds a bit WONKY… not proof read :\ this is gender neutral!!!

sum: modern day au of Scaramouche breaking out into an angry fit at the reader (his lover!!)

warnings: inflicting harm? And cursing. I think that’s it!!

You walked into Scara’s office. As the strong smell of rich mens cologne washes over your face, you looked for the man. He was searching for a book from his bookshelf… you smiled, you’ve missed him so much! You guys barely had time to spend with each other after you got a new job. “Hey, Scara!!” you tried to tackle him from behind, but received no reaction. It wasn’t new, he almost never reacts. He grabs the book he needed and walked back to his chair. You held onto his sleeve as and followed him like a lost puppy. “Scaraaa—“ you whined. You start to circle around his desk to annoy him, but stopped after just awhile. ‘He didn’t even give me a glance, jeez’. You were starting to get a bit upset just because he was paying you no attention even when the two of you are dating, even when you gave him everything you could. ‘I’m supposed to be used to this by now…so why does it make me feel worse and worse every time?’ you asked yourself. “ughhhhhhhh..” a groan escaped your lips as you sat on the side of his desk. ‘I don’t want to be annoying but that’s the only way to get his attention at this rate.’ You let out a huff, and finally he sends you a look. “what” he stated rather than asking. “Do you wanna go out and eat??? OH or maybe watch a movie?” You asked as you started poking at him. “Can’t” “I’m busy” he said as he proceeded to type on his computer. “Pleaseeee? You canceled on our past four dates scara.” You say hopping off his table. His typing stops. “And? I have a job, y/n. and you’ve got one too. How about you worry about that?” he glared. ‘Ouch.’ Was all you could think. You’ve asked him so many times to hang out with you but he’ll always cancel or reject you. “Can’t today” “I had to go to work on late notice” “Don’t feel like it” was all he ever used as an excuse. He never even tried to explain himself anymore, or even tried to let you know before you got all ready for him. You smiled and reached your hand out to tackle him again “Cmonnnn! Scara plea-“

a harsh sting spread all over your arm. It felt like thousands of needles dug into you. And for the first time, fear was the only thing that you felt when looking at him. It felt as though you couldn’t register anything anymore. Looking down, you saw that your arm had turned purple almost immediately. Eyes, watery from the stinging. Your wrist was almost completely numb. He turns around to you right away, his eyes filled with regret and shock. “Oh my god— y/n I’m so sorry— I didn’t mean to, I swear I’m sorry” he stood up quickly to comfort you, but you just couldn’t look at him the same anymore. You couldn’t control the waterfall coming out of your eyes or your shaking. You backed away as he stepped closer. Realizing his own lover had stepped away from his comfort, he freezes. What did he do this time? How could he even treat you like that? Why? He didn’t want to believe the ways he’s been hurting you. “Y/n I’m so sorry, please don’t cry…I’m so—“ he said reaching his hand out, but it was too late. You’d already started running out of the office. “Shit shit shit shit” he said looking down as his palm. He’d lost you didn’t he? You’re the only thing he’s had his entire life.

When he was mad? You calmed him. When he was sad? You comforted him. “When he was lonely? You kept him company. When he wanted something? You gave it. He was sick? YOU cared for him. It was all you. In his ruin filled world, everything always revolved around you. And even if he didn’t show it, he loved you more than anything the world could give.

‘shit.’ he was running after you but couldn’t find you anywhere he looked. Not in the bedroom you two shared, not in the kitchen, nor the lounge room. shit. he sweared on and on. He ran to the bathroom door. “Y/n? Y/n please. I’m sorry. Can you let me in?” He said with his entire heart. He’d do anything for you to not be scared of him. To not see him like everybody else did. To forgive him again. For the last time. He just wanted you. The door opened slowly as he rushed to embrace you. His face in your neck, and his arms around your shoulders. “Y/n….fuck. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” he kept on rambling I’m sorries. You pushed him back to the front of your face. Your eyes swollen and red. “It’s….fin…fine” you whispered. even if your voice was shaky, you still spoke. And to be honest, you couldn’t see the Scaramouche that you knew anymore. You placed your hand on his face to wipe away his tears. His eyes widened in disbelief, your arm completely bruised blue and purple. He pulled you into his arms and into his chest. “‘m so sorry…it’s not fine. fuck.” He said with his hand caressing your head. Hiccups left your mouth as you cried.

“S…scara?” you hiccuped. “Yes, y/n?..” the boy answered right away, in the softest tone he’d ever used. His face full of worry. “I—“ “I need a break from us.”