chloexx1313

[chloexx1313]

[chloexx1313]

I see and hear so many awful things about trans women like me or trans people on the internet how i'm a predator how i'm dangerous to women or to children on social media on Youtube Twitter and more even on television or from journalists.

It makes me sad to see how so many people see people like me and believe i'm a threat just because i was born "male" in reality i've never been a man i've had what doctors call gender dysphoria since i'm 8 years old i've never understood men the things they like or how so many treat women.

Many people don't believe me when i say this but i was not raised as a man despite being born with those bits that i don't like.

My mother was bipolar i would often visit her in psychiatric hospitals and my father was on the road working he was never home so i was never raised socially as a "boy" or by anyone i just navigated through my childhood not understanding anything even at school i was around boys my age until high school where i had to stop school because things were getting very difficult for me i still didn't understand anything any of those social roles how men acted and i hated how they talked about women.

All i knew was that i was different that my body and how i was called i didn't like i didn't learn the words like gender dysphoria or trans people until much later.

I was raised in a very racist homophobic and transphobic family i grew up around violent men in a ghetto i hated that and these days i find it very difficult to trust men personnally.

But it's just sad of how people sees trans women like me i feel this way about cis women i can sense how i can immediately be perceived as a threat i understand in some ways but i feel it's just unfair i wish more people would see i'm not a threat i'm just a person.

I don't like what i've got down below and i know in so many people's heads that's the problem because i'm seen as a "man" i am not i'm a trans woman but my whole person is judged on my genitals how is that fair in any way ? I've never used it and never wanted to on anyone i've never done it in my life and i never will but just because of that thing i was born with i'm seen as a menace.

All i want is to be in the arms of someone doing things that i love i love just cuddling with someone and look into someone's eyes and enjoy the moment i love holding hands with another person i guess i'm romantic i'm just saying that to say that it makes me sad how the world sees me people also often say that trans people don't care about women's safety when it's not true.

I'm actually terrified of making a cis woman or anyone else uncomfortable i have such a low opinion of myself i say sorry all the time to people i try to be careful when i'm around cis people just because of who i am it's exhausting all because one of the first things a lot of people see when they see trans women these days are how we're a threat.

I'm not a threat i'm just a person.

I hope i didn't offend anyone in this post this is just me sharing my thoughts at 2 am but if you've read all this thank you.

[chloexx1313]

As i said in my first post here i'm depressed i don't feel like doing a lot of things but i have been playing lately when i feel and want to oblivion remastered on ps5 im playing a wood elf woman this game's great

[chloexx1313]

Alright since this is my blog i'll just write what i feel so i'll just talk about my trauma why not story time i doubt many people are gonna read this anyways

So i'm trans i used to work for a store cleaning shit for 2 years until last year in Summer where everything went to shit.

I told my coworkers im trans i had been on hormones for a while and started presenting physically as a woman which seemed to bother no one until i told in private to someone at the store i work at my new name i'm generally a very private person i don't really talk to people i'm just doing my thing and then i leave i only did this because i was changing my papers and my name legally so they would have found out anyway.

I did that i thought things were okay then a few weeks after my boss called me to tell me he started to receive from the store i work at "anonymous complaints" about how men and women are not safe around me.

I had worked there for 2 years without any problems so i knew this was about who i am.

So i start talking to the owner of the store about those "anonymous complaints" he doesn't say who it was then just straight up tells me that i can't use the women's restroom.

I get into a heated argument with him and tell this lad that i fucking work in the bathrooms too i clean those damn bathrooms both the men and the women's bathrooms what a genius.

Then i make a mistake i was naïve he tells me to go into his office and then wait there so i did then he came in with another guy twice my size locked the door then told me to sit.

He started dropping the façade told me i'm not a woman but if i want to enter the woman's bathroom i need to give him a document that "proves i'm a woman" that i need to have at all times on me yeah like a nazi forcing trans people to wear a pink star to identify them i told him no then managed to unlock the door and get out of his office

I cried after that and had to call someone to help me everyone saw me cry in that store no one gave a fuck.

It doesn't stop there oh no that's just the start actually after that every people i thought i knew for 2 years came to me every day someone different defending their boss to tell me how im a shitty person how i was doing a "disservice to the trans cause" a man told me that that dude never went to a trans protest or even knows what being trans is and told me that to my face.

Every day was a bunch of fucking assholes trying to guilt trip me trying to make me feel like shit gaslighting trying to tell me im hysterical all because they just did not want me to use the women's restroom.

I resisted.

Then they tried to make compromises.

They told if i had to use the women's bathrooms which i was already doing anyway without any problems they said i would have to by now tell the whole staff everytime right before i go into the women's bathrooms.

Because i'm apparently such a fucking menace wow i'm taking a piss washing my hands and leaving sometimes after i clean those fucking bathrooms how dangerous.

I resisted and refused.

Then they tried to find another compromise they told me i just can't use the women's bathrooms but i could go outside go into public bathrooms and into women's bathrooms if i want then go back into their store to work.

Then i got blamed at because i did not educate people about me being trans i couldn't believe how fucking unbelievable this shit was oh i'm sorry i guess it's my fault for existing i should let you know everything about me and cater to your fragile little feelings.

Fuck those people fuck them i want to fucking trash them in justice but i dont know if i have the energy and i dont know if the justice in my country will actually give me justice for all this shit i've suffered.

Then it got more dangerous i started getting insults on my appearance i started getting yelled at by managers and threatened and i decided to leave.

Anyways that's how i met a bunch of transphobes who probably watched anti trans videos all the time and are obsessed with trans people.

[chloexx1313]

Helloo i'm a trans woman i'm 23 i live in France

So idk what to say i'm depressed lately so i hope i can meet some cool people

I love video games i've played all the life is strange games the kotor games i love story games and star wars i've played most telltale games i love RPG's i've played the mass effect games the Fallout games (the first two games too) Vampire the Masquerade Bloodlines and more.

Im trying to get into reading i like audio books too ive seen a lot of tv shows i watch movies sometimes.

Im not working right now cause i lost my last job to transphobes about a year ago i'll make another post for that because why not and well there's probably more to say about me but that's all i can think off right now

I will post some pictures of me here sometimes maybe too anyways hello everyone