chrisevansmeatball

[chrisevansmeatball]

I miss my little one.

@angieswimss

earthy

Santa Cruz, California

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[chrisevansmeatball]

dont put too much pressure on yourself. everything will be okay.

[chrisevansmeatball]

Read more about your Zodiac sign

[chrisevansmeatball]

💙❤️Steve 🇺🇸Rogers❤️💙

if you wanna be my lover you gotta be able to rip a log in half with your bare hands

[chrisevansmeatball]

5am; alone with my own thoughts

[chrisevansmeatball]

Maybe we’ll come across each other at the turning of the century, racing across the breaches between worlds. [insp] (x)

[chrisevansmeatball]

Not a lot of people know this about me, but when I moved to California, I struggled to find someone to trust and even friends that hung out with me had deliberately hurt my feelings to secure social hierarchy. It was kind of rough, trying to fit in with everyone else to avoid being ridiculed for reasons I couldn't understand. In 5th grade, I couldn't find it in myself to go home after school, feeling unsafe and unloved in my home, so I spent every day after school in my 5th grade teacher's classroom, helping set up or cleaning up the classroom. When he wasn't there, I went to the other 5th grade teacher's class to look at picture books or sit along on his bean bag chair in his reading nook. His class's students had the opportunity to learn about a vast amount of science related topics, and once a year, his students were able to get permission slips signed by parents to watch his pet snake feed on a prey and stuff like shed its skin in the cage. Well, being super jealous but understanding the circumstances, he picked my brain after school and allowed me to play with his many cool toys on his desk like the balancing eagle and this polar bear puzzle. It took me 42 minutes to put it back together the first time I took it apart. I panicked thinking I had broken it. When I put it back together, I rejoiced. Every day I went back to this polar bear puzzle, undoing and redoing it all over again until I was able to solve it in 30 seconds, until I promoted from 6th to 7th grade and went to a different school. People don't really know how they make a difference in a kid's life because evidently I hadn't forgotten about this polar puzzle. He didn't really need to care about me; I wasn't even in his class. But he did, and I am forever grateful that someone took interest in me. So imagine how 25 year old me felt 10 years old again when I finally found this polar bear puzzle on eBay. It's used, and it's obviously not the exact one he owned, but it is so dear to me. That's what I did this week for self care -- honor and love the innocence of the childhood me, instead of being mad at myself for not being a perfect kid. #selfcare #selflove #enough

[chrisevansmeatball]

"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." There's a lot for me to process today -- from some yucky news, to my client's case, to the Out of the Darkness walk going on at Santa Monica right now to support and build awareness to suicide prevention. I'm reflecting on my own personal struggle, and others I know and have lost from a successful attempt. I'm sitting at work, thinking about the progress I've made as a growing human, and this quote rings so true to me now more than ever. I've spent so long, wanting to be as good as everyone else, as good as others I've met who are so outstanding at what they do and are such awesome people that I'm inspired and aspire to be like them. But because of that, I've lost connection to myself, and I've forgotten that I'm pretty freaking awesome too, and that I'm still growing and I should be pleased about the person I'm becoming. And perhaps that's why I struggle so much with my intrapersonal relationship, believing that I'm so little, and have low worth, and am so undeserving. So maybe my greatest accomplishment thus far, on a personal and even a professional level, is my strive towards being comfortable with being myself. What a beautiful thing to realize, to gain self worth during personal struggle, and on a day like today, and really on any day. But, I like myself a lot today 😌👑🍾🏅🏆💎🎉💖💯

[chrisevansmeatball]

me in a horror movie

[chrisevansmeatball]

Worrying does not take away tomorrow’s troubles, it takes away today’s peace.

Unknown Author (via shelbys-advice-blog)

[chrisevansmeatball]

🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕

[chrisevansmeatball]

😍

[chrisevansmeatball]

“That food smells good. I think I’ll try a bite…”

[chrisevansmeatball]

Awe Cas😻😻😻

[chrisevansmeatball]

I wish someone took a picture of every time we were together. I want to see the expression on our faces. I want to see how I look at him when he's looking at me.

[chrisevansmeatball]

How even... 😢 I'm so hurt... In loving memory of Alan Rickman and Professor Severus Snape ❤️ #alanrickmanforever #professorsnape #always #doepatronus

[chrisevansmeatball]

earth is flat you fucking goblin