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It’s the early afternoon and I’m bundled in blankets on the couch, nursing a monstrous hangover that is entirely self-inflicted. An hour of youtube trailer surfing later, I come across Miles Joris-Peyrafitte’s ‘As You Are’ and I’m instantly captivated. It reminds me of Gia Coppola’s ‘Palo Alto’ in the emotion but there is something darker in it too. I don’t have a synopsis of what it is about but I’m weirdly inclined to believe it will make a massive impression on me. This is just a question and prediction put out here on the internet so that my future-self can look back on and either say “yes, i can’t believe i could feel this before i even saw it” or “wtf, i’m a pretentious asshole”. Let’s await...
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I watched Ball’s poem at 2pm and by 4pm, this video was created. I didn’t plan anything but sat for two hours, creating, building and hacking away at the final product. I didn’t think about it, I just did it. I find that when you just create, without the waves of doubt washing upto the shore of your mind, you create the things that represent how you truly feel. This poem found words for all the feelings I thought were indescribable. And thus, here is my own interpretation of Tarriana Tank Balls’ “What You Tell Yourself When You Think No-ones Watching”
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late-night, after-movie film thoughts #1
12 minutes ago, I arrived home from freshly watching Morten Tyldum’s newest film, ‘Passengers’, starring the infamous Jennifer Lawrence and comedic Chris Pratt, an unlikely duo to say the least...
My primary reaction is that it was an enjoyable 116 minutes as my mind didn’t wander and I didn’t imagine an entirely new film in that time. However, it was in no way to me an ideal film. The premise of the film posed a lot of questions to the audience. Firstly, what would you do if you woke up alone on a spaceship heading to another planet 90 years away? Secondly, what if you could wake another up and ruin their chances to live and exist in the future? Thirdly, what if someone woke you up with 88 years left on a lonesome spaceship? And lastly, would you risk a world of incredibly possibilities for just one other person? I liked all these questions and the myriad of possible answers that sprouted in my mind. And although I’m getting a little over the space trend spreading like the Black Plague over Hollywood, I do love being sucked into an entirely new environment that my own mind could have never thought up. Alike to Charlie Brookers’ ‘Black Mirror’ that places the audience into wacky and deplorable situations in an unquestionable realistic way, I enjoy sci-fi films. In my opinion, the best sci-fi films and films in general have their genre as a backdrop to the main plot and characters. The greatest films are human-based, they make you love and hate, they make you feel what it is to be human. In that sense, I enjoyed Passengers. I liked that although the film was set in space and had its surface complication being about space, it was about much more than that. It was about sacrifice and the power of one person to completely make up your own world. It is there that I truly enjoyed and disliked this film.
As my one problem with the film wasn’t the ideas behind it as I loved the confronting problems within Jim and Aurora’s relationship. For me, it was the lack of chemistry between Lawrence and Pratt. This thought isn’t anything against their impeccable acting skills but simply that I didn’t believe that they were in love. Call me cynical but I felt nothing when they kissed or when they made love. Thus, i wasn’t able to feel the full effect of the film as the thing that held it all together had no impact on me whatsoever.
I understand that my thoughts are subjective and perhaps, on second viewing they would change but for now, it is 11:08pm and that is what i feel.
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103 Films I Want to Watch by the end of the 2017.
Godfather Part II
Taxi Driver
Raging Bull
Memento
the Pianist
amadeus
the Graduate
the Green Mile
Sunset Boulevard
Lawrence of Arabia
Apocalypse Now
Dr. StrangeLove or How I Learned to Stop Worrying
no Stranger than Fiction
Alien
Misery
some came running
A Beautiful Mind
the Prestige
from here to eternity
heat
Sullivan’s Travels
nashville
if
eyes wide shut
the great dictator
the red violin
there will be blood
the Apartment
Wuthering Heights
Shane
American Graffiti
the lives of Others
the French Connection
the Deerhunter
Cinema Paradiso
bonnie and clyde
Rocky
the Shining
Paths of Glory
on the Waterfront
12 Angry Men
the good, the bad and the ugly
Mean Streets
Gangs of New York
Casablanca
King Kong
Godzilla
seven samurai
Psycho
City Lights
Saving Private Ryan
Spirited Away
Rear Window
west side story
Modern Times
city of god
it’s a wonderful life
once upon a time in the west
Vertigo
Boogie Nights
M
Amelie
Blade Runner
Casino
Rio Bravo
the Big Lebowski
Rebecca
it Happened One Night
Fargo
the Great Escape
no Country for Old Men
Trainspotting
Gone with the Wind
The Sting
Snatch
Bicycle Thieves
Rebel without a cause
L.A. Confidential
2001: A Space Odyssey
The Kid
Some Like it Hot
Chinatown
donnie brasco
american history X
Star Wars Films
Lord of the Rings
pulp fiction
jackie brown
UHF
kill bill volume 1 & 2
Grindhouse
Citizen Kane
Mad Max: Fury Road
Metropolis
All About Eve
Singing’ in the Rain
Brick
A Hard Day’s Night
Interstellar
Still Alice
the 400 Blows
Lars and the real Girl
Walk the Line
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The Glorious Award-Winner
I hate that when I imagine the ultimate level of success in my future career, I instantly think of winning an oscar.
Of course, every person aims for the highest possible achievement or accolade in their future career and for me, that is the infamous Oscars. I admittedly have practiced various versions of the same speech in the shower, the crying, the long list of “thank you’s”, I’ve done it all.
However, recently a close friend asked about the film that would get me there and it made me realise something. If all I imagined was winning some award for this incredible film I was set to make, I would be obsessed with the winning component of the entire process. How was I supposed to start thinking of a simple story, a story that would captivate people if I gave myself the added pressure of it being award-winning?
I realise it is very naive of me to even believe that I stand a chance but what kind of overly-enthusiastic young person would I be without these idealistic dreams?!
Instead, what I want to focus on is the film itself, the story that I need to form on the blank pages that surround me. I want to have millions of stories in my head so that even if all of them turn out to be in the bin, hopefully, one can stand on its own two feet. And I can teach it to walk.
-an idealistic dreamer who no longer hopes for the glory but for the blood.
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First Lesson of 2017
“The minute you get out of your own self-centred mindset, you’re instantly freed from your own pain”
-Anthony Kiedis
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