coffee-is-a-miracle

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𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐠𝐮𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐥𝐢𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐩𝐬.

excerpts from a book I’ll never write

[coffee-is-a-miracle]

I love the shift in doctor who from “the tardis is a woman in the way a boat is a woman” to “the tardis is a woman in that it sorta has a personality” to “the tardis is a woman in that it’s a living sentient being with a literal soul and she actually controls herself because she likes taking the doctor on adventures and she loves the doctor so so much and they’re each others family and he takes care of her and sweet talks her and gives her little kisses and they’re marriedddd” That’s how every guy with a boat feels anyway

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And I’d wait for you With bated breath If I could bait This heart of mine That you would Someday Truly be mine

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“And what kind of madness is it anyway, to be in love with something constitutionally incapable of loving you back?”

it is natural that I should be attracted to the most distant inaccessible light

The Irony of the Leash, Eileen Myles, from 'I Must Be Living Twice: New and Selected Poems 1975 - 2014' (x) // Things to Watch Out For, Natalie Wee, from 'Our Bodies and Other Fine Machines' // Along the Strand (for Steve Levine), Eileen Myles, from 'I Must Be Living Twice, New & Selected Poems 1975-2014' // Bluets, Maggie Nelson (x) // Wax 'N' Wayne, Eileen Myles, from 'I Must Be Living Twice, New & Selected Poems 1975 - 2014'

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She’s taking the kids

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I think it’s quite a shame that jack was made immortal and the doctor just. left him.

my guy. my dude. you have so many issues. because you always have to say goodbye to your (mortal) companions. and then the one dude who CAN’T DIE you leave on a fucking ship

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Doctor who is literally just a story about grief. About the stages beyond the normal five. About hope and reaching and living hard and fast and passionately bc we're all going to die. About outlasting those you love most and being forced to keep on living. About celebrating the dead and the dying bc they were once alive and will forever be alive in your memories. About learning how to move on despite knowing some part of you never will. About running as fast as you can while clinging to the small bits of love and happiness you can scrape for yourself along the way. About outliving and outlasting everyone and everything you've ever put you faith in until all you have left is the faith itself. About always being dead and alive at once, carrying everyone you've ever lost and every version of yourself you've ever been on your shoulders bc you are too kind and too selfish and too full of grief to do anything else.

Doctor who is about grief. It is about life and death and hope and fear and ecstasy and bravery and melancholy and the constant balance between optimism and weight that living brings.

Doctor who is about grief. It is about how life is only precious bc everything has its time, and everything ends.

And god, isn't that fantastic?

@friendlyneighborhoodamara @neat-crows @lindensea

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The most important question about s3, is David Tennant going to be set on fire?

If Amazon decide not to commission Season 3, I will personally set David on fire to make up for it.

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I have just witnessed a terrifying example of the difference between Ten and Eleven

There are some episodes, like The Waters of Mars and The Impossible Astronaut (the one I’m watching right now) in which the Doctor shows his darker side

To be honest, I did not like The Waters of Mars, but I’ll talk about that another time

Anyway, when Ten becomes the Time Lord Victorious (*shivers*) you can see his rage

You can see it in his eyes

You can hear it in his voice when he says that the laws of time have to obey him, that he’s not a survivor, he’s a winner

But Eleven

Eleven is cold

Eleven is serious

Eleven is usually all happy and childish and cheerful and silly with his bowties and fezzes

But in episodes like this

You can see that the pain he feels has reached an even higher level

He knows that no one will ever fully understand how he feels

Those who did are all dead

But after all

He’s the Doctor

The Oncoming Storm

The last of the Time Lords

Time Lord Victorious

Whose loved ones die

Whose loved ones leave

Whose loved ones forget about

A killer who values life more than anything else

And above all

Alone.

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The Master if he watched the events of The Waters of Mars in the Matrix

Ten: “THE LAWS OF TIME ARE MINE! AND THEY WILL OBEY ME!!!”

The Master: *Nearly passes the f*ck out, falls down, and does not get up for a very long time*

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Doctor who is a flurry of emotions, one moment you are laughing at something ridiculous happening, and then suddenly you are crying over your favorite character dying. I love it.

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I will never get over how bitchy the Daleks are

Cyber Leader: Daleks, be warned. You have declared war upon the Cybermen.

Dalek Sec: This is not war - this is pest control!

Cyber Leader: We have five million Cybermen. How many are you?

Dalek Sec: Four.

Cyber Leader: You would destroy the Cybermen with four Daleks?

Dalek Sec: We would destroy the Cybermen with one Dalek! You superior in only one respect.

Cyber Leader: What is that?

Dalek Sec: You are better at dying.

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And in love with their transportation wehicle

If I had a nickel for every time David Tennant played an immortal genderfluid ace non human character who has seen the creation of earth and who is in love with a nice sassy blond person I’d have two nickels, which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice

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is this anything

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“To fall in love is to create a religion that has a fallible god.” — Jorge Luis Borges.

The Satan Pit, Doctor Who (2005) // The Wrath of the Lamb, Hannibal // Lovin’ is Bible, The Aces // John Keats Letter To Fanny Brawne, 19 October 1819 // Litany in Which Certain Things Are Crossed Out, Richard Siken // A Knight’s Tale (2001), Dir. Brian Helgeland

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Old Tweet

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Great! Now I wanna be a blue police box and travel across the time and the universe with my best friend

has anyone else ever stopped to think how the tardis feels when doctors and companions leave because its ruining me rn

like imagine you’re this sentient spaceship and you have an unbreakable bond with a time lord who stole you and ran away. and how sad it must be watching them die and be reborn over and over again. feeling them die and be reborn over and over again. oftentimes destroying your very being in the process. you’ve been together for thousands of years, possibly more, and you’ve gone on nearly every adventure together. 

they know you inside and out (literally) and while they are a quite careless owner, they make up for it with the constant repairs when you get damaged or need general maintenance. its how they show you they care, because you know they do. you have a telepathic connection with them, after all.

you take them wherever they need to go, even if its not where they want to go. its fun to show off every now and then and make it look like they don’t know how to pilot you. but all of time and space, so many distress signals, you hear planets and ships and people calling out for help. your time lord isn’t like the others, they like to help. you take them to those people so they can help.

and oh, the people. your time lord likes to pick up strays along the way - human beings more often than not. you don’t particularly like the idea, the humans always have sad endings, and you don’t like to see - to feel - your time lord experience that sadness over and over again. but they continue. how many has it been now? too many to count. but you keep count, you do. 

some of the humans you’re more fond of than others. some of them your time lord is more fond of than the others. some of them grow on you, others don’t, but all the same if your time lord cares about them, you care about them. you like when they say that you’re bigger on the inside, that part is fun.

perhaps you don’t mind the humans as much as you should, you’re supposed to have multiple pilots anyway. if this is how you procure them, then so be it. unfortunately your time lord never cares to show any of them how. they would rather bumble around on their own and crash land into things than share that part of you to their human friends. hubris has always been their downfall.

there have been a few that have done it though, some more successfully than others. finally! you have another pilot!! you like these ones especially, they pilot you much more carefully than your time lord ever has, and they have established what little telepathic connection their tiny human brains can handle. not quite the same that you have with your time lord, but every little bit helps you feel more connected to those humans than the others.

it hurts more when those ones leave.

it hurts when all of them leave.

but your time lord continues on. drying up the tears and probably regenerating into a new face - again - but this new face loves you all the same. they pick up more strays. the strays leave. repeat endlessly.

you have too many bedrooms in storage, too many clothing preferences in the back of your wardrobes, too many favorite snacks left to expire in the cupboards, too many personal items and too many souvenirs from their travels hidden away, never to be picked up again. but you’re infinite, you can keep going so long as your time lord keeps breathing. you can continue growing and changing, making room for every new human friend, altering yourself for every version of your time lord.

you hold all of these memories, all of these lives, just the same as your time lord. but they don’t have to organize, sort, and carry the physical reminders of all of those lives like you do.

they can saunter off and forget it all, when its convenient. but you know they don’t actually forget. neither of you can ever forget. 

and the weight isn’t any less just because there’s two of you to carry it.