Probably gonna be weird shitAny pronouns18 :)
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

my therapist suggested i imagine my intrusive thoughts in the voice of donald trump bc i do not possess an ounce of respect for him or trust in his competence. going thru it today so i made this. hope this helps
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HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!!!!!🎉🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
I hope all of you have a wonderful, safe pride and remember to celebrate yourself!!
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concerned and confused, my favorite genre of wilson
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it really is crazy how quickly people were willing to just let chatgpt do everything for them. i have never even tried it. brother i don't even know if it's just a website you go to or what. i do not know where chatgpt actually lives, because i can decide my own grocery list.
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fuck you hostile architecture fuck you requiring proof of someone’s address fuck you removing benches fuck you street sweeps fuck you pay-to-unlock bathrooms fuck you anti-encampment laws fuck you parking meters fuck you homeless shelters/hostels that make you pay, that have a cap on the amount of personal belongings you can have, that have rampant unaddressed abuse fuck you anti-homeless laws fuck you police fuck you fuck everything that criminalises being homeless
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𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐢𝐭 | 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐢𝐝

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader
Category: Smut 18+ MDNI
Summary: Teasing your virgin boyfriend was all fun and games, until he’s too worked up to function. When the layers of clothing fall off, you’re in for a delightfully large surprise.
Content: 3.2k words, virgin!Spencer, kinda sub undertones, he’s hung af and really fucking whiny, fingering, hand jobs, raw p in v but reader is on the pill, multiple orgasms, Spencer cries because he needs it so bad, reader wears lip gloss, dacryphilia (lemme know if I missed anything)
a/n: Truly just 3.2k words of filth. I wrote this instead of the next chapter for my thesis and I have no regrets. Also, a lot of my italicized words got lost because formatting on the app truly is the bane of my existence, but I reached a personal milestone and wanted to celebrate! So yay, here's a fic as a thank you for supporting my blog and writings ❤️
Sometimes dating Spencer Reid meant throwing subtlety out the goddamn window; the man wouldn’t know subtext if it hit him square on his beautiful, perfectly sculpted face. All your subtle attempts to seduce him have all been entirely unsuccessful, and you're beginning to wonder if he even wants you that way.
In your defense, you've been dating for over two months now and he still hasn't initiated anything beyond making out. It’s been making you antsy. Of course, his hesitation is nice. It comes from a place of respect after all, and there’s something endearing about his gentle touches, large hands ghosting over your body. You appreciate this easy, steady pace you've set for the relationship.
But after a particularly busy week for both of you, you've been left aching and needy for something more.
When you finally found a time that works for both of your schedules, you decided it would be time to make your move. Fuck waiting for him to initiate. You can do it yourself. You'd been subtle about it at first—a hand on his thigh, a few inches higher than where you'd normally place it, lips running over his jaw.
The man had simply laughed nervously, and returned with a kiss to your forehead.
Briefly, you wondered if it truly is because he's not into you that way. However, that thought flits right out of your pretty head when you see the unmistakable tent slowly forming in his pants.
So you’d upped your actions, nibbling at his earlobe in the middle of dessert, fingers trailing up his inner thigh, dangerously close to his crotch. Screw subtlety. (And hopefully, him too.) By the time you two sat in the back of the cab, he’s a squirming mess.
“S-stay the night?” he’d been so shy about it you debated teasing him a little more. Maybe if you weren’t so horny, you would have, but relief had simply flooded your veins. Finally. So you nod, teased him a little more in the back of the cab until he had to grab your wrists and hold them in place, because he swore he’d probably come in here just from one more brush of your palm. The lightest pressure and he’d be a goner, a pathetic mess, and you hadn’t even really done anything.
There had been no build up once you got into his apartment. Simply an exchange of quick, sloppy kisses, Spencer pushing you deeper into his house until the couch hits the back of your knees and both of you came tumbling down. He’s already rutting his hips against your thigh, his erection hot even through his slacks. Clumsy fingers strip off fabric and shoes, leaving them strewn haphazardly on his living room floor.
You had pushed him away then, grinning enticingly as you went to straddle his lap. You ground your hips in circular motions against his still clothed crotch, gasping as the obvious bulge gives you even more traction to rub on.
“No fair,” he whines, fingers leaving crescent shaped indents on your hips, “P-please stop teasing, you’ve been doing it all night.”
He’s so tightly wound it’s almost pathetic. He’s lucky you’ve some semblance of mercy left in your body, because you could probably come undone just from the friction that came by dry humping him. But you relent, sitting back on his thighs as you tug at his underpants.
“All right baby, since you asked so nicely.”
Thus exposing what’s going to be the small issue of the night.
Rather, the large issue.
His cock springs free and for a moment you just stare at it. Red, veiny, pulsing and huge. Larger than anyone you’ve been with, larger than even the toys that hide in that one drawer in your bedroom closet.
“W-what’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
“You paled a little.”
A shaky laugh escapes your lips, “You didn’t tell me you were hung.”
His eyebrows scrunch, so ridiculously adorable you have to bite your lip to stifle another giggle.
“Hung?”
“Yeah, like, your dick is huge.”
Red blooms across his cheeks, “It’s - it’s certainly above average—”
“You know what the average length is?”
“I-in North America, yes.”
“I didn’t know you swung that way, baby.”
He groans, moving to hide his face into the crook of your neck, “That’s not what I meant.”
“I know, I know, I’m kidding.” You manage to shift and catch his head before he has a chance to press it to your neck. Your lips land on his, and he’s pushing his tongue inside your mouth sloppily. When you pull away for air, you add, “You’re just bigger than what I’m used to.”
“Is that bad?”
Is it? One hand wraps around the base of his cock, stroking up delicately, testing out the girth and the weight of him. He shudders, muscles tensing. His fingers dig into your hips. With a grin, you reply, “On the contrary, I think it’s exciting.”
You position yourself over him then, letting the blunt tip run up and down your slick folds. The friction makes you both shiver. Every single ridge and vein of his cock catches on your sensitive flesh, and you can’t help but start moving your hips up and down, rubbing your folds over the length of him.
“You’re - ah - so wet.” his tone is wretched with desire and awe.
“All for you baby.” You continue your ministrations, letting his length part your folds, the tip hitting your clit at certain angles. His cock is covered in your slick within moments and your poor boyfriend looks like he’s about to combust. You feel the twitch of his cock, the shift in the way he moves his hips—rocking up desperately against you—and you know he’s close. So you stop.
You’re rewarded by another whine.
“Please,” his grip is hurting you now, palms clutching handfuls of your ass. You don’t think he’s even aware of how tightly he’s doing it. “Please, I’m so—”
“Spence, do you really want to cum without even being inside me?” That shuts up his whining. “Mhm, didn’t think so.”
“Can I— please, just—”
“What?”
“Wanna touch you.”
Your lips tug into a smile. At your nod of assent, one of his hands let go of your ass to move to your pussy, the pads of his fingers quickly locating your clit.
“Fuck, Spence,” your head falls forward, forehead meeting his, “Faster, baby.”
He obeys, tilting his head forward to capture your lips. Your mouth opens to him, muffling your moans as you begin to move, shamelessly riding his hand. His finger finds your entrance, dipping shallowly, hesitantly, but you’re so wet that, with a quick thrust of your hips, the digit slips all the way in.
Spencer pulls away from the kiss to watch, the pupils of his eyes nearly eclipsing the ochre irises as your pussy swallows his finger greedily. Transfixed, he adds another finger and it’s your turn to squeeze and mark up his alabaster skin with crescent marks.
“Yes,” you groan, gasp, writhe in his lap as his fingers curl and find the sweet spot inside you, “Oh god, Spencer, yes!”
He’s entranced as he pumps his fingers in and you, mouth hanging open as your pussy parts and accepts his fingers so prettily. To reciprocate, your hands—plural, yes both hands—wrap around his cock, starting a slow, lazy pace. That throws his rhythm off, fingers stilling inside you.
“Keep going,” you urge him, hands slowing to a stop as well, “Spencer.”
He whines, hips bucking up into your palms, but something in your voice seems to set him straight. Fingers thrust in and out of you again, long and elegant and stretching you for what’s about to come. Satisfied, you pump your hands over his cock again, twisting them every time you motion up, and squeezing as you go down. It doesn’t take long for him to fall apart, his cock twitching before cum shoots from the tip. Because you’re straddling his lap, it makes a mess and lands on both of you—his stomach, your chest, some even on your hair.
“Oh god,” he’s whining again, embarrassed, “I’m sorry, I’m so—”
You silence him with a kiss, still stroking him, as your hips move over his hand. His brain manages to work, curling inside your fluttering walls. The movements are messy, uncoordinated as you chase your orgasm and he struggles to catch up. A whine leaves your lips, soft and needy. Something about it must trigger the neurons in his beautiful brain, make him remember you have the perfect bundle of nerves being neglected and he has more free fingers.
With a slight shift, he presses his thumb to your clit.
“Fuck, baby, yes!” you cry out breathlessly, head falling forward on his shoulder.
“Good?” he asks, increasing pressure on that sensitive nub. Small, quick circles. You wonder when he became so dexterous.
You nod, thighs clenched and quivering as your climax nears, the pleasure in your stomach building and coiling into something white-hot and— “Oh, Spencer!”
His other arm wraps around your waist, crushing you to him as he helps you through your orgasm. In the steady comfort of his arms, the rocking of your hips slow to a stop. You feel his lips at your temple, not really kissing the spot, just resting there. Heavy breaths rifle strands of your hair.
“Oh god,” he sighs, fingers slipping out of you with a pop, “Angel, that was amazing.”
You straighten up, grinning, “We're not done yet.”
“No?”
Eyes dart down suggestively, and his gaze follows to his own lap. Still completely erect, his cock lays flat against you, heavy and pulsating. “No, I think I need to take care of you a little more.”
“Y-you don't have—”
But you've already lifted yourself to your knees, fighting through the quake in your thighs, in order to position the tip of him at your slick entrance. His hands return to your thighs, nails clamping down on your skin.
“But I'm not— condom—”
How cute, he can barely speak. You grin, press a chaste kiss to the dimple on his cheek. “I'm clean. And on the pill.”
“You sure it’s okay?”
It's more than okay, actually. You're too shades shy of being desperate for his cock to split you open, but you're not sure if he'd survive hearing that sentence so you say, “Of course it is baby. Unless… you want me to stop?” If he catches the hint of insecurity in your voice, he doesn't show it.
Instead, his head is shaking no, vigorously, lower lip jutting out in a pout.
You smile, and kiss it away, “Okay then. I'll go slow, okay?”
You'd meant it as an empty warning. Really, there's nothing more you want than to impale yourself down on him and ride him like there's no tomorrow. However, as you slowly lower yourself onto his cock, as the blunt tip breaches your entrance and spreads your walls, you realize that going slow is probably more of a necessity.
He's big. Almost uncomfortably so.
One sharp exhale from your lips and he's suddenly looking at you in concern, “Are you all right?”
“Fine,” you gasp, although the furrow in your brows suggest otherwise.
“You don't have to—"
“Hush, baby, I just need a moment.” You say, forcing yourself to relax and take more. The broadest part of his head pushes through, stretching you wider than you've ever been. Soft, keening sounds fill the air. It's hard to know which came from you, or from him.
You look up, and laugh when you realize Spencer's skin is dappled with large red splotches. He's staring at where the two of you are connected, his cock barely fitting inside you. With a deep breath, you roll your hips around, trying to get used to the feeling. He whines again, his torso falling back onto the cushion, “Oh my god,” he gasps, lower lips trembling, “Oh my god, please.”
“Need you to be patient for me, Spence.” you mutter, dropping down a little more. You place one hand on his thigh for balance, while the other wraps around the base of his cock, stroking him to give him some relief. The greedy bastard bucks up, involuntarily, and you hiss as another inch pushes into you before you're ready.
“Spence!”
“Sorry, I'm sorry! Just - oh god, oh god, please, oh did I hurt you?”
And then it happens. Something glimmers on his cheek as it catches the light. And then another. And again, this time on the other cheek. Your hand leaves his thigh to grasp his chin, tilt his head up.
Your boyfriend is crying. Splayed out on the couch, cushions embedded by the sharp joints of his elbows from where he's propped himself up. He's looking up at you with glimmering liquid gathered on the rims of his lashline. Dripping down his cheeks, only to be replaced by another bout.
“Baby,” You sigh, pouting as you lean down. Soft lips catch his tears, leaving sticky residue on his cheekbones from the remains of your lip gloss, “It's okay.”
Another sob. Large teardrops crawl down his chiseled face.
Knowing that it’s your fault makes a feeling of power surge through you. “You’re so pretty like this, Spence.”
“Angel, please—”
The sight of his tear streaked face does something to you, your walls relaxing and fluttering as you manage to accept another inch down. His reaction is instantaneous, nails sinking into your hips, head falling back. “No, no,” you say, hand coming to the back of his head, tilting his head forward again, “Look at me.”
Tear streaked and hazy eyed, he manages to keep his head steady in order to maintain eye contact. It’s a little sick, the way this turns you on, but it allows you to sheath his cock further in.
You lift yourself up, until only the tip remains notched inside you, and his cock gleams with the evidence of your arousal. With a smile, you sink down again, walls fluttering as you take him deeper, until you have about three fourths of his length buried inside you and he’s little more than a puddle.
A hiss escapes your lips, brows knitting from the stretch. It isn’t just that his length is impressive, it’s that he’s thick too, splitting your pussy open. But now he's buried more than halfway through, giving you enough room to lift yourself up, and sink down again.
You count that as a victory.
He groans, muscles tensing, and you know he's desperately trying not to buck up and meet your movements. With a small smile, you lean close, forehead resting on his. Large, honeyed eyes stare back up at you, still glassy with tears. You repeat the same motion of your hips, moaning as you feel every single ridge and vein of his cock straining inside your walls.
“Feel good?” you murmur, swiping a stray teardrop with your thumb.
“Mhmm,” he nods, breath hitching as your movements grow steady. The sting remains, but it's grown dull now that you’ve gotten more used to the size of him.
“Oh god, baby, why haven't we done this sooner?” you whine as you rock on top of him, enjoying the fullness of having him inside of you. The question is rhetorical, but he's in absolutely no state of mind to answer. His hands grip your hips tightly as he sniffles, unable to do anything else except enjoy the ride you're giving him.
Praises leave your lips, murmured in tones cloyingly sweet and half mocking.
“Crying over sex, you're so lucky I'm so into you.”
“You look so pretty with tears in your eyes baby."
“Never had pussy this tight, haven't you?”
That last one rips another sob from him, because you know this is his first, that you're making a mockery out of something significant for him. So you soothe with a kiss, and whispers of “I'm sorry, it's okay, you're doing so good, you feel so good.”
You punctuate it by moving faster, your pussy thoroughly comfortable and so wet that there's barely any struggle to bounce on his dick. However, you're still careful, still unable to take him all the way in. You figure it's something you both can work up to, something for the future. The thought makes you smile.
Besides he doesn't seem to mind, moaning beneath you as you ride him. He seems to have lost all ability to articulate himself, instead just staring at you with red, tear filled eyes and a slack jaw. It makes you giggle, the way he looks so utterly fucked out.
You clench around him, walls tightening sharply, sending sensations that make the two of you gasp.
“I-I'm so close.” He manages to say, his hands now helping you, guiding your body as you impale yourself over his cock again and again, “Please, I'm so—”
“I know, baby, I know, you can come.”
His eyes squeeze shut, and his voice is especially strained when he asks, “Inside?”
You tug his hair teasingly, and his kids flutter open again. With a grin, you confirm, “Inside.”
A few more thrusts and he's gone, crying out, squirming desperately beneath you as spurts of his cum paint your walls. You don't stop, riding him continuously as you chase your own release. Thick, creamy liquid drips from your pussy and down the base of his cock with every movement.
He sobs even more.
“Touch me,” You whisper, pleading, “Spence, please baby, I'm so close.”
His fingers are at your clit in an instant, rubbing hasty circles as your pace grows erratic and sloppy.
“Please,” He gasps, looking up at you with glassy, imploring eyes, “Please I wanna feel you come.”
Your body seems attuned to his desperate pleas, because as soon as those words leave his lips, your pussy clenches around him so tightly you both yelp in surprise. He doesn't stop his ministrations on your clit, helping you through your orgasm until you're panting. For the second time tonight, you collapse against him, face buried at the crook of his neck.
“My god.”
He laughs, breathless, “My god indeed.”
He shifts, moving slowly so he doesn't jostle your boneless frame too much. There's a hiss from you as he slowly pulls out. You find yourself clenching around nothing, feeling oddly empty after such an intense fullness.
Silence wraps around both of you, heady and languid. His fingers in your hair, scratching your scalp. Soft intimacy after a whirlwind of lust.
And then he breaks it, so achingly sweet it almost makes you cry, “I'm sorry that I hurt you.”
“Mhm?”
“Earlier,” He clarifies, lips finding your shoulder and staying there. His voice becomes muffled and sheepish, “When I thrust up.”
“I didn't think you'd remember that.” You tease, fingers tangling into his hair and tugging at his curls.
“I've an eidetic memory, remember? I remember everything.” He laughs too. Relief makes his voice sound lighter. “I never want to hurt you.”
“You didn't,” You reassure him, “Well - okay, a little bit, but it's fine. I don't think you meant to.”
“Of course not,” He hums, lips traveling up your neck, “But I'll be more careful next time.”
“Next time huh?”
“Mhm,” Teeth on your jaw. Playful, teasing. “Next time.”
It sounds like a promise. You know he intends to keep it.
This was a request by @mggslover lol I forgot to add up top oh well
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This edit is so stupid but I had a vision
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I’ve decided to go all out for a project at school, so I’m dressing up as House for it
More mouse bites

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have i said anythign yet about how in my opinion wilson’s chronic cheating is due to the fact that he can’t accept that he’s a closeted homosexual and he is going through women looking for some kind of spark that he’ll never really find, because he’s in love with house
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the world is running out of glassblowers and yet you want to become a fucking doctor
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thinking of a werewolf bf who’s embarrassed about popping a knot.
he wants to prove that he can be a good lover for his human partner and control himself, but he really can’t help it when it starts to swell.
“Fuck, s-sorry, slow down, I-it’s getting bigger—“ He croons, trying so hard to keep himself together but the way you’re bouncing in his lap is driving him crazy.
He’s absolutely flustered, incredibly embarrassed when he realizes it’s swelling too fast for him to stop. It feels too good, and all he wants to do is see it pop right into you.
“I-If you take it, I’ll have to cum inside, s-sorry.” He’s stammering to explain, so flushed he can barely look at you without risking cumming immediately, while you feel it pushing up against your walls until it’s stretching.
Taking him down to the hilt, silently letting him know that you want his fat knot inside of you, swelling until it’s too big to pull out.
He’s gasping when he cums, his cock twitching like crazy as he dumps load after load inside of you. His knot is so big you can see it from your tummy, forcing him to deal with the realization that he popped a knot inside his mate before they’d even came which is practically the werewolf equivalent of cumming in your pants.
He’s babbling apologies the entire time it’s deflating, his seed starting to drip out of you as he pulls himself out.
You just kiss him, telling him theirs nothing to be ashamed of anyway.
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size kinks are neat yeah but i simply can't read it as a fat girl when the op is screaming in my ear her SMALL THIGHS and TINY FRAME please godddddd
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i dunk on bella swan as much as anyone but deep in her heart she was a monsterfucker and i have to respect that
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boyfriend asked what i was doing, told him i was editing a picture, boyfriend asked "is it something like house stretched out with the words 'menstrual blood' on it or some shit?", boyfriend was wrong, boyfriend was also onto something this goes hard

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ARGUXEYHSRY THIS IS SO COOL NOW I WANNA MAKE ONE
Tried to make a Beastars oc, it’s my first time actually trying something animal/furry-like so it’s not that good but I’m still happy with how it turned out!
Lilian is a snow leopard
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Why is there no Stoick the Vast x reader works please I love this man🙏😭
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Werewolf bf who loves to piss on you when you shower together, covering your slick body with his scent is too satisfying to resist. And even though you wash it away immediately with your perfumed soaps to the point you can’t smell anything but the body wash. Your werewolf bf (and every other monster) can smell his mark on you and know he has claimed you.
#monster lover#terato#werewolf#monster fucker#monster boyfriend#monster fic#werewolf bf#piss#werewolf piss#werewolf marking#werewolf x human
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