concoctionboy

[concoctionboy]

I decided to split off a copy of myself and have it turn itself into a philodendron, to add a little more color and life to this place.

I mean, when I say it turned itself into a philodendron, I just mean it, like, made itself philodendron-shaped; it's still translucent and slimy and the wrong shade of green, so it's not a perfect likeness. But eh, close enough.

[concoctionboy]

I mean, it's not like I intentionally introduced them. In fact, I'm not really sure how they found each other. But, uh, I guess... love wins?

So apparently that evil version of me from another dimension who tried to kill me a while back and that cultist who plotted to sacrifice me to his eldritch god have hooked up. Huh.

[concoctionboy]

Okay, yeah, turns out the loincloth and sandals he'd been wearing when he came here were still in the back of the wardrobe in the guest room all this time. I hadn't noticed them because I don't really use the wardrobe since I don't, you know, wear clothes. But yeah, hopefully with these you'll be able to get his scent and have an easier time finding him. Let me know how it goes.

So, uh, @i-hit-things, I don't mean to rush you and I really appreciate that you're willing to help, but, uh, any progress finding that adventurer? I think my, uh, due date is only a few weeks away, and I'd really like to let him know he's going to be a father before, um... you know, before it actually happens.

[concoctionboy]

Uh, I mean... not really; the only souvenirs I have from him are, uh, the ones growing inside me. Aside from that, I don't think he left anything here.

Wait, actually, that may not be entirely true. I, uh, kind of gave him a new set of clothes for the Halloween party, and he left still wearing them, and I'm not totally sure what he did with the clothes he'd been wearing before? I mean, not that he had many to begin with; he was basically just the loincloth-and-sandals type of adventurer; but still, it's possible his original clothes are around here somewhere. I'll take a look and get back to you.

So, uh, @i-hit-things, I don't mean to rush you and I really appreciate that you're willing to help, but, uh, any progress finding that adventurer? I think my, uh, due date is only a few weeks away, and I'd really like to let him know he's going to be a father before, um... you know, before it actually happens.

[concoctionboy]

So, uh, @i-hit-things, I don't mean to rush you and I really appreciate that you're willing to help, but, uh, any progress finding that adventurer? I think my, uh, due date is only a few weeks away, and I'd really like to let him know he's going to be a father before, um... you know, before it actually happens.

[concoctionboy]

Another minor advantage of being a slime is that if I, like, want to change the TV channel and can't find the remote and don't feel like getting up, I can just scoop out a blob of myself and throw it at the TV and it can push the button on the side of the TV to change the channel manually.

Admittedly, this method does have its drawbacks, but there's no need to go into those right now.

[concoctionboy]

Oh, I totally forgot about this poll until I was looking through my blog archive just now for something else. Well, I guess I'm a slink.

So as a slime twink, would it be better to call myself a slink or a twime?

[concoctionboy]

I mean, I guess they did kind of have a point about my tracking goo in their stores.

Okay, it always annoys me when those mobile games install themselves on my phone without my permission, but now somehow I've got this app that traps people inside the phone and lets you control their digital surroundings, and I don't even remember seeing an ad for this app and I have no idea where it came from.

[concoctionboy]

Well, I've split off a lot of copies of myself, some of which were on distant planes, and chances are at least some of those copies have split off more copies, so I don't know how many mes there are out there but it's potentially a pretty big number and they're probably spread out all over the place over many different planes, so if someone is trying to collect them all they've got their work cut out for them.

In the time since I was created in a vat by an evil wizard a few years ago, I've split off and subsequently lost track of a lot of copies of myself, so when things are tough it can be kind of comforting to think that somewhere out there there's probably a me that's having a better day.

[concoctionboy]

Wait, but @gavamont said yesterday he was the one who sealed someone in my phone. Are there... are there two people trapped as apps in my phone? Hold on, let me check something.

Okay, I'm pretty sure there are two different people trapped as apps in my phone. This is... weird.

On the plus side, though, I'm surprised at how little of the internal storage they're taking up. I'd have thought a whole person transformed into an app would take up a lot more space on the memory card.

Oh... as for the screaming slime in the vents, yeah, some wizard came by and left that here a while ago, and I'm... not sure what to do about it.

Okay, it always annoys me when those mobile games install themselves on my phone without my permission, but now somehow I've got this app that traps people inside the phone and lets you control their digital surroundings, and I don't even remember seeing an ad for this app and I have no idea where it came from.

[concoctionboy]

I mean, first of all I really prefer to try nonviolent solutions, and besides you don't know what I went through to get this phone. You'd be surprised how unwilling most phone company representatives are to sell phones to slimes.

Okay, it always annoys me when those mobile games install themselves on my phone without my permission, but now somehow I've got this app that traps people inside the phone and lets you control their digital surroundings, and I don't even remember seeing an ad for this app and I have no idea where it came from.

[concoctionboy]

Yeah, I think airdrop is an iPhone thing; I have an Android. Besides the other obvious issue with doing that.

Well, at least the app menu gives me the option to remove permissions for the app and block notifications; hopefully that'll minimize any trouble...

Okay, it always annoys me when those mobile games install themselves on my phone without my permission, but now somehow I've got this app that traps people inside the phone and lets you control their digital surroundings, and I don't even remember seeing an ad for this app and I have no idea where it came from.

[concoctionboy]

Uh, okay, so... is this something I should be worried about? Any advice about what I should do?

Wait, maybe I'll check the app settings; see if there's anything there that might help...

Okay, it always annoys me when those mobile games install themselves on my phone without my permission, but now somehow I've got this app that traps people inside the phone and lets you control their digital surroundings, and I don't even remember seeing an ad for this app and I have no idea where it came from.

[concoctionboy]

I think from what I can tell this app is used to trap people in the phone; it's not a person sealed in the phone itself.

Unless you sealed that person in the phone as an app that can trap people in the phone, which would be... diabolically recursive.

Okay, it always annoys me when those mobile games install themselves on my phone without my permission, but now somehow I've got this app that traps people inside the phone and lets you control their digital surroundings, and I don't even remember seeing an ad for this app and I have no idea where it came from.

[concoctionboy]

I mean, there's nobody actually trapped in the phone yet; just the app is installed there.

At least, I don't think there's anyone actually trapped in the phone yet. I'm not totally sure I understand the app's interface.

Okay, it always annoys me when those mobile games install themselves on my phone without my permission, but now somehow I've got this app that traps people inside the phone and lets you control their digital surroundings, and I don't even remember seeing an ad for this app and I have no idea where it came from.

[concoctionboy]

Okay, it always annoys me when those mobile games install themselves on my phone without my permission, but now somehow I've got this app that traps people inside the phone and lets you control their digital surroundings, and I don't even remember seeing an ad for this app and I have no idea where it came from.

[concoctionboy]

…Also probably many mes that are having way worse days, but that part's less comforting.

In the time since I was created in a vat by an evil wizard a few years ago, I've split off and subsequently lost track of a lot of copies of myself, so when things are tough it can be kind of comforting to think that somewhere out there there's probably a me that's having a better day.