constant-pleasure - Tumblr blog

[constant-pleasure]

ikaw yung kantang wala pa sa kalahati

ililipat ko na

ikaw yung nilabas kong usok

mula sa sigarilyo

na dumaan lang sa labi ko’t

unti-unting naglaho

[constant-pleasure]

oo, tama nga 

mahaba pa nga ang panahon

sakto

mahaba rin ang pasensya ko

sana lang

sabihin mo

kung aalis ka

o babalik ka pa

para alam ko

kung tama pang

maghintay

at kung kailan

kailangang

tanggaping

wala na 

[constant-pleasure]

tell me 

everything

tell me 

no lies

and nothing

but the truth

tell me 

if you 

felt the same

tell me 

if

you even

loved me too

[constant-pleasure]

would you remember me for the next two months that we'll not be talking for the next two months that you'll be with him would you remember the times we had the kisses you gave and the way we held hands

[constant-pleasure]

she kissed me with the love she had for someone else

[constant-pleasure]

we didn’t talk today the silence was loud we got many things to say i saw it in your eyes and if you saw mine you know they wanted to shout

[constant-pleasure]

looking at myself on the mirror

thinking about the guy you’ve been talking to

darling, i could treat a lot better

think about the times we had, just me and you

[constant-pleasure]

the night has come and i'm here again under the stars smoking another pack still wishing that you'd come back i reckon you've been hanging with him the same way your scent used to hang with my shirt all of this time i thought we were close i even kissed your neck so i can't see the reason why you're saying that we weren't i know you've been talking for quite some time with him but have you thought that maybe you want me as i was laying down i wanted to call you up just to hear you voice once more and imagine that you're closer tomorrow, i will be seeing you again another day of staring at you on your phone talking to him and it would be my favorite pain

[constant-pleasure]

update: this must be the second pack of cigarettes

you’re still the one killing me 

[constant-pleasure]

midnight

he brought her food

fuck

if i lived 

a lot closer

i think 

i also would

maybe

i’d do better

but guess what?

life must have hate me so much haha

[constant-pleasure]

waiting for the day that you'll leave him praying for the day that you'll finally need me

[constant-pleasure]

4:28pm alone. traveling with just my shadow. this must be the most melancholic bus ride of my life. i miss how our skin touches before. i miss your stories, those never ending stories of yours. i miss how i wrapped my arms around your body. i miss your neck. i miss your shoulders where i rest my head. i miss you hair. i miss your scent. i miss you cheeks. i miss your kisses. i miss your smile. i even miss the way you can't look me in the eye, because you were still in love with someone else. yes, i know you're not here, but i still look for you. yes, i know you're with him, but i still wish you're with me. i might even say that i wish i was him. i just dont know how i'm gonna get used to this feeling, how long will i be able to hold back my tears.

[constant-pleasure]

if you tell me

that you’re mine

i will always love you

and find time

to kiss you

down to your spine

and to fuck you {hard}

every single night

[constant-pleasure]

she still wears the ring you gave her showing it off in her photos

then tomorrow, she’s gonna act like she wants me she’s gonna look every time with those enticing eyes

why the hell am i even playing her game

[constant-pleasure]

grunge love xx

[constant-pleasure]

naubos na ang barya

sa kakabili

ng tingi-tinging 

sigarilyo

naubos na 

ang panandaliang remedyo

para sa bigat

ng nararamdaman

naubos na 

ang pag-asa

nang sabihin mong 

hindi mo pa kayang

limutin siya

naubos na 

ang luha

sa kakaiyak

sa kaisipang

siya pa 

pero kahit anong sakit

kahit anong tingin

kahit ilang beses sabihing

“siya parin”

hindi maubos-ubos

ang 'di mapigilang

damdamin

[constant-pleasure]

3:45 am

in love with a girl who’s loved by many. in anyway, even romantically. she’s the light in the dark and the life of the party. said that she was uncertain about reciprocation, but there’s really something going on. sometimes, it gets really muddling when she acts like she still wants him. she wants him to get back to her. but she says that she hates him for what he did. i don’t really get it. i lay in bed every night thinking to myself why am i in love with this girl. i lay in bed every night thinking to myself why does she let me touch her and kiss her neck, but it seems like she wants somebody else. well, i know she wouldn’t just let anybody do those things but why does it feel like everyone’s chasing after her and she’s fine with that? why does it feel like she’s just fucking with my emotions?

10:34 pm

i wrote those earlier. earlier when i haven’t talked to her about it yet. 

i asked her if she still wants him, she said she doesn’t. obviously, i felt joy and all but, it doesn’t seem right. something seems to be wrong. something’s still wrong. so i asked her

       "do u still love him?“

       "probably”

if you know the difference between possibility and probability, you already know i’m fucked up. 

that moment, i wanted to cry but i couldn’t, i wanted to scream, but i couldn’t. i tried to ignore everything, to shut the world up, but it didn’t. it laughed at me. everything was so wrong. i felt so played. i was her “somebody else” in an optional way.

but then again, she’s uncertain. she’s beautifully unpredictable. she’s the love of my life. 

maybe someday, i’ll get back to my senses. maybe a day will come and everything i’m thinking now, everything i’m feeling now will make me want me to stop. but now, i’m deeply in love with her. love, in the deepest manner where even the fact that she still loves him, can’t make my soul stop from craving her.