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I absolutely hate you to your very core but I want to make out with you at the same time and I do not like this feeling.

Well, that just sounds like a YOU problem!

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Can I borrow one of your furs, I'm freezing over here 😅

Of course, dear. Let me bundle you up to rescue you from the cold-- and if you get lonely? Well, I’m a source for heat, too.

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“Ah, hello, I’m new in Vesuvia. I’m an apprentice with the magician in town. I humble myself to ask if you would mind showing me around..?”

“This isn’t another one of their trick’s again, is it? Don’t they have you on a tight leash? I’ll gladly give you a show around, but I don’t want a hex being put on me just for knowing how to show someone a good time!”

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I know you don't buy anything on sale but pants are 100% off at my place,,,, maybe you should stop by

As admirable as your words are, I fear you’re selling yourself short. I would never try to bargain myself into your pants-- though.. the offer is tempting.

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Hello Lulu.

What a pretty pet name! I’ll cherish it, darling, but good evening. Did you sleep well?

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You seem like a man of fine taste. Would you like to come to my cellar- I have a very rare selection of wines you might enjoy.

Dear, you realize Camio is the one known for repeating himself? I already told you. My courtiers would gladly welcome you to dinner. I don’t want to go to your wine cellar, I have a fine enough collection of my own!

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hello sire can you land me some money? spare a coin maybe?? plis plis???

Oh.. dear, begging? That hurts my heart to hear you sound that way-- please, show me whatever you want to buy. I’ll gladly get it for you!

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You could pull off a dress with the boots, eating would be a 1,000/10 💕

Oh, do I know it!

Wait--

..Eating what? What are you eating?

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I’m stressed Lucio. Nothing is working out the way I want or need it to. What would you do?

Well, that’s not good at all. I’m sorry you feel that way, darling. Normally, I have to take a step back from a situation and breathe. You know, gather my thoughts. I try to view my problem from all aspects I can before making a decision.

If no thoughts come to mind? I take a luxurious bubble bath to soothe myself and try again after. That normally works.. 

Perhaps try to also ask for a second opinion? That’s also helped me when I was stumped.

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Why don’t we have dinner tonight, Lucio? On me💛

That’s very sweet of you… but I feel like you deserve much better– besides, you should save your money to buy something nice for yourself. Let me treat you, hm?

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You are so adorable when you blush, Lucio 😍

You think I’m adorable with just a little blush? Well, I suppose that’s just the appetizer.. I think other parts of me that blush are far more appealing.

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I want to mark every inch of your beautiful body with my teeth

Ahah.. Right.. um.. I’m sure you do..

AHEM!

You should at leave buy me dinner first.. Or even let me treat YOU to dinner.

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Don't let that anon insult you like that, dearest Count! Your hair is absolutely gorgeous! They're probably just envious.

Of course they’re envious! Most likely on the fact that they don’t have as silken golden locks as I do. Here, feel for yourself, I’m not some fraud.

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You and plague-doctor rp would get along great, you're both asshats that put full sized pics in your rps. Yeah a picture is worth a thousand words, but as roleplaying is a WRITING community any rper would prefer the thousand words over the picture. I don't know why more people are not attacking this trend and those who have more pictures than words in their responses. Its a shortcut that pisses me off and the result is more rpers with lower quality writing.

(Right, I understand that you’re upset that I’m using pictures to respond to my asks, but this isn’t really roleplay. My roleplay typically happens in my dms. I don’t understand why you’re being so harsh to me when you don’t even know me. I haven’t felt very well since the update as it gave me a panic attack, so I haven’t been roleplaying. So, before you say I’m a low-quality writer, let me just give you my work.

This I wrote for an AU based on an edit Joyce on joycelikes’ blog.)

(I put it under the keep reading since it’s fairly long and could be obnoxious to some people. This was just a starter. I keep my gauge for replies between 3-6 paragraphs. I don’t like to keep my detail on low quality. I understand you’re upset, but my dms are open for roleplay. My asks for specifically.. for asks.)

The snow wrapped the trees and and the ground below. It was a blizzard. A shame his birthday was so late into the winter, it only meant he would need to hunt smaller game to retain his body heat. It wasn’t so bad when he was following their tribe’s hunting grounds but as he got further and further from their trails paved in the dust of the beetle’s death, he found it harder to settle in a direction. The only driving force against this blizzard was the fact he *needed* this hunt. He had proven himself to their tribe time and time again, but this was the final stretch. The biggest hunt he would ever need. To show he was bigger and better than his mother, that he could make the tribe grow.

As time passed, the force of the wind was too strong and he knew that if he didn’t spend time later to keep moving, he’d end up losing his way entirely and end up somewhere without his clansmen. So, without any further delay, he continued to weave by the trees until he found a hilly area. Taking his sword from his sheath, he ripped through the roots of the overgrown-but-long-dead trees and knew that there was room beneath, as there was already a pocket of stone with patches of dirt above. Not the most comfortable but a spot to avoid the wrapping snow.

He was able to down comfortable and unwind his pack. He was able to make a small cot from the furs he skinned and then a small wrapping for his head to keep it warm against the cold stone. He curled up, keeping himself as small as possible and rather than putting away his blade, he tucked it under his head, right in the crook of his buried neck. He was able to rest for two consistent hours, but still, instinctively pretended to be asleep.

He heard the sound of creaking. Soft ‘pad, pad, pad’s of boots smooshing snow outside his ‘tent’. He sniffed, breathing in. He grit his teeth. Gross. Savages. Foreigners. In their territory, again. He was alone. He didn’t know their numbers. He had to listen. Two pads.. then four.. perhaps eight.. four people? Then a 'thump’. They were approaching him, inside his safe haven. He could feel their disgusting weight waning above him. Their hazardous breath waning against his neck. And without missing a beat, his wrist swung and down in the blade went into the mercenary– twice, then three times, then four. Finally, the man, screeching like a banshee ran off in a burst of fear,  howling to his comrades to run off from his hideout. Good. As they all should. No one encroaches on the Scourge’s territory.

Ugh. He was soaked. That would get him sick. Rather than letting the blood the pig left soak into him fully, he tugged off his shirt and tossed it outside. Like it was ripped off of someones back. The scent of blood would be carried outside, perhaps as a warning to other wanderers. He hid the blade again, pretending to be asleep. He didn’t wipe the blood off. It had marked his chest, the stone infront of him, and by his head. From his pale skin, he looked as if he was dying already. He had hoped to look like a corpse until it was brighter out, so the heat could at least perhaps make the walking bearable.

Later that night, he heard a pair of 'pads’ outside. Only one. Light. They must not be carrying a travelling back. Not a mercenary? He quietly sniffed the air. No, not a mercenary.. but what was that *awful* aroma? Familiar, but distant and so very off.. He remained still. Letting this presence slink closer to him. A 'thump’ as they got closer. He could nearly feel.. hair? Perhaps hair.. It was tickling his shoulder. He didn’t know yet.. it could be a wild animal. If so, it would be better to act dead in this situation. So, he waited patiently, like a true predator.

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You are so needy. Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I ignored you.

What could you possibly mean by that? I have no clue what you're talking about. 

I'm... not needy.

I don’t need your attention!

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¨ahoy! dangerous!¨ it was a small snake in a pirate hat holding a dagger in her mouth. She seemed intent on poking something.

Just what do you think you’re---

At seeing the snake, a part of it warmed him. It was cute, honestly, He would have taken out his own blade, but didn't seriously mean the snake any harm. So, he leaned down, taking out his pinky with a grin.

En garde, you beast!

He then proceeded to sword fight with the small dagger-- he earned a few cuts and marks on his pinky, but nothing a bandage couldn’t fix. What’s a little gain without pain?

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1v1 me in the macy's parking lot there can only be one alpha blond in this city SLUT

Oh, I’ll be there. I’ve been meaning to knock my competition down a leg or do. What form of combat trial?

Blades?

Hand to hand?

Do tell, I’m all giddy inside from the anticipation!