cozycottagevibes

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"I want to be known and mourned for the life I lived, not the way I died."

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Nie Huaisang: *moves to hug Wei Wuxian*

Wei Wuxian, has trauma: *flinches back*

Nei Huaisang: What was that?!

Wei Wuxian: I thought you were gonna hit me!

Nie Huaisang: I was going to hug you!

Wei Wuxian: Why would you hug me?!

Nie Huaisang, incredulous: Why would I hit you?!

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Lan Sizhui: baba, you need to stop hugging me, I have to go.

Wei Wuxian: a-yuan doesn't love baba? Baba is expendable? Baba is useless? Baba will become a hermit. Jail for yuan-er! Jail for yuan-er for 10 000 years!

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No thoughts besides the fact that Wei Wuxian was the Sunshot Campaign's MVP.

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Am I an introvert? No.

I'm a selective extrovert. No, you cannot get me to start a conversation and I will under no circumstances talk to strangers, but once someone I'm familiar with says something I will not stop yapping.

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Wei Wuxian: Why is it your uncle and not your dad? Who's your uncle?

Jiang Wanyin: *spawns* I am.

Wei Wuxian, internally: Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck—that's Shijie's son—fuck—I'm a useless idiot—fucking fuCK—

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No, 'cause someone tell me why do I have such a wide variety of preferences. I read MDZS, then got obsessed with Apothecary Diaries, and now I'm watching fucking Monkie Kid.

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Mo Xuanyu: *does the Sacrificial Ritual*

Wei Wuxian, dragged back into life kicking and screaming, hanging on by his fingernails: *screeches* NO! I do nOT consent to thIs! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!? LET ME HAVE SOME F*CKING PEACE, YOU SON OF A MANWH*RE! I DIDN'T DIE FOR THIS!

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I need fic recommendations for Wei Wuxian casually dropping his lore and abusive childhood post-canon and everyone being horrified while Wei Wuxian is just oblivious.

Like, "What do you mean you were never disciplined with a spiritual whip as a child?"

Or, "Huh? I'm scared of dogs because they almost killed me on the streets when I was younger. Never happened to you? Hm. Weird."

Please. It's a need.

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Your kindly reminder that Lan Wangji is a petty motherfucker.

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Random thought of the day:

You know how in Trolls when Velvet says "Stop attacking me!" in a flashback to when her and Veneer were kids? I imagine that tone for Wei Wuxian when someone's being nice to him. Like, "Stop complimenting me!"

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Can proudly say I share a birthday with this guy. Happy Birthday Lain!

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Wanna remind everyone that Cangse Sanren is a title; Cangse meaning "hidden colours" and Sanren meaning "wanderer". We, as fans, don't know her name because it doesn't mention it in any of the adaptions. Since her name isn't mentioned at all in the novel, and it's through Wei Wuxian's POV, it means he most likely doesn't know his own mother's name.

Because god forbid Jiang Fengmian not be emotionally constipated enough to tell his ward about his mother (am I a bit salty? Abso-fudging-lutely, and in this essay I will—).

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The moon yearning for his sun.

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Wei Wuxian, pointing at Jin Ling: What's with this sassy... lost child?

Jin Ling: *hisses*

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Wei Wuxian, decisively: I am going to have a bunch of kids.

Jiang Wanyin, sarcastically: And do you know how you're going to get from point A to point B, dumbass?

Wei Wuxian, nodding: I'll just pull a Shushu and kidnap some kids off the street.

Jiang Wanyin, sputtering: A-Die did not kidnap you off the streets—

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I want Wen Ruohan's genuine reaction to finding out his youngest child's dead, his bodyguard/greatest weapon is dead, and that the tide of the war's changed in his opponent's favour because of some scraggly seventeen year old. Like, give me THAT.

'Cause Wen Ruohan's been experimenting with Yin Iron for a hot while, and then this kid, child, infant honestly—just... one ups him at his own game. That's the biggest "Fuck You" ever.