cristifa

[cristifa]

@imirish-therefore-kissme for D

The wolf is so done with the fox’s bs 😂

[cristifa]

@imirish-therefore-kissme absolute unit 😂

[cristifa]

@imirish-therefore-kissme oof

some of you have never spent 100 years frozen in an iceberg while the world you were responsible for protecting fell to war and it shows

[cristifa]

Yeah yeah @imirish-therefore-kissme find me a nice Tom to marry, I guess.

think it’s about time we stop making jokes about the amount of famous white boys named Chris, and about time we started focusing on Tom. Am I talking about Cruise? Hiddleston? Hardy? Holland? Hanks? Felton? Fletcher? Selleck? Welling? Ford? Hooper? Brady? It’s impossible to tell because apparently half the male population are called Tom.

[cristifa]

@imirish-therefore-kissme 😂

oh good

[cristifa]

@anadventureinwriting the escalation!

[cristifa]

@imirish-therefore-kissme Dragon Age Companions as John Mulaney quotes...

all the dragon age companions and protags as john mulaney quotes

Warden:

Alistair:

Morrigan:

Zevran:

Leliana:

Wynne:

Sten:

Oghren:

Shale:

Hawke:

Aveline:

Bethany:

Carver:

Varric:

Merrill:

Anders:

Fenris:

Isabela:

Sebastian:

Inquisitor:

Cassandra:

Iron Bull: 

Vivienne: 

Dorian:

Sera:

Blackwall:

Cullen:

Josephine:

Solas:

Cole:

+bonus Solas to Cole post breakup

[cristifa]

@imirish-therefore-kissme this made me tear up

:/

[cristifa]

@imirish-therefore-kissme I’m cry

just saw bindi irwin got engaged and apparently her fiance is american. she’s 21 and they’ve been dating for 6 years. I wonder if his family lives in aus/works in conservation because imagine just being a random 15-year-old tourist at the zoo and having a meet cute with steve irwin’s daughter lol 

[cristifa]

[cristifa]

@nubby-nipple oh.

[cristifa]

She’s a goofball and I love her

♪ 33 year old lady ♪

[cristifa]

@imirish-therefore-kissme for giggles

I would be the worst spy of all time because on one hand I overshare like hell, but on the other hand I also have THE shittiest memory so it’s really a lose/lose scenario for everyone involved.

[cristifa]

@imirish-therefore-kissme it’s thicy

me at any given time: can we just buckle down and focus on the task at hand please???

my brain:

my brain: ……….ranibow sprimkle……………

[cristifa]

@imirish-therefore-kissme ha

I had a dream I was watching keeping up with the kardashians and Kylie had gotten cyborg legs like they had taken the legs of an AT-ST from Star Wars and put them on her lower half so she was like 11 feet tall and Kim was like “I think Kylie’s new legs are SO fun..”

[cristifa]

@imirish-therefore-kissme They fixed it ♥️

Twilight AU where Bella is rightly Creeped the Fuck Out by Edward rather than intrigued by him and, hoping to defuse the situation before it becomes a Thing, decides to talk to his “sister” about his behavior

What Bella knows about the fallout: Rosalie is out of school for a couple of days, and upon returning gives Bella a thumbs up from across the lunch room but offers no further explanation. Edward is absent from school for a couple of weeks, even when the rest of the Cullens are all there, and then carefully gives her space from then on out.

What Bella does not know about the fallout: Rosalie “Rapist Eater” Hale tore her surrogate brother’s arm off at the shoulder and beat him around the head with it while yelling “Don’t Stalk Girls” until Emmet and Jasper pulled her off of him and made her give the arm back.