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TEEN WOLF (2014) 117 - 4x2 dir. Christian Taylor.

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Breaking news: fanfiction site down for maintenance local hellsite in shambles

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Okay so like stick with me but young Derek, alive hale fam au.

So like the Hale family finds out that Derek has a crush on Sheriff Stilinski’s delinquent son, and has mixed reactions. Talia is torn between amusement, worry and wanting to dislike stiles. Papa hale is very protective but thinks it funny that him and his son have the same tastes.

Peter is ecstatic, Stiles once beat him in chess when running from the cops. (stiles was running and sat down in the park around people for cover, turns out he interrupted a chess tournament. Peter challenged him to a game if stiles lost, Peter would turn him over to the police. If he won, stiles could use him as an alibi)

The rest of his siblings don’t really have an opinion other than using Derek’s crush to make fun of him EXPECT for Laura. Laura is in a one sided rivalry with stiles.

As the sheriff right hand deputy she was tasked with keeping an eye out for stiles and she constantly loses him. Which shouldn’t be possible because she’s a werewolf. She can never connect him to a crime he’s committed and can never prove anything. Can’t go to a judge a say “oh he left a scent trail which I followed because I’m a werewolf.”

Derek brings him home to dinner after they start dating. Unfortunately, the day that Derek brings him over, is also the day that Laura had to run around town taking reports of his crimes. She is fuming. Stiles looks her dead in her twitching eye and asked her how her day went.

The only crime she can connect him to is when he commit aggravated assault against a few of Derek’s teammates went to far with hazing. (Derek refused to fight back as not to hurt them) she lets him off.

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Twitter is down in my country so i have to fucking found out AS I WAS READING 😭😭😭

Ao3 has fallen 😞

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If I may share some of my innocuous headcanons

P.S. anything that happened after S6 didn't happen. And half of the stuff that happened after S3 didn't happen like that.

Hales

Peter has an identical twin named Thomas. He hates Thomas and Thomas doesn't understand why, but Peter argues he knows what he did (he doesn't)

Peter and Thomas have a triplet sister. Her name is Shane. (This is what happens when I try to play out the Hale family tree in the Sims)

There is another sister between Peter and Talia. Her name is Shannon. She was 15 when her mother announced her surprise pregnancy. Talia was stunned and Shannon broke down in tears

Talia: You're not going to be the least favorite Shannon: Oh, is it going to be the baby? Is it going to be you? Talia: ... You're right, you're going to be the least favorite

Talia didn't like how Thomas and Shane had jobs and Peter didn't, so she made him get one after school. It didn't matter what it was as long as he was working. He tried (unsuccessfully) to get himself fired

It's also where he met Corinne. Malia and Jackson (obviously he's Peter's kid) were conceived in a Macy's changing room

If Peter had a say in naming his kids, he would have either chosen Celia and Collin (after his parents who died when he was young) or Petra and Peter Jr.

(According to my Sims game) Derek has 7 sisters. You've heard of Laura and Cora, now get ready for Zora, Nora, Aurora, Flora, and Dora

Brett says his family was killed in a fire. If this town had more than one family killing fire, people would know that (and hopefully mention it). Brett and Lori are cousins of the Hales

Sometimes the family visits their Great Aunt Barkley. That's just what they call her, no one knows her real relation, her real name, or which side of the family she's related to

Talia and Deucalion were besties. He definitely had unrequited feelings for her

When Cora was young, she was pissed she wasn't getting attention since she's the baby, so she cut her hair off into a choppy bob

The Hales have a famous recipe for mashed potatoes and cheesecake. It is a huge deal if a Hale introduces the recipe to someone they're dating. They may as well be engaged

No one born into the Hale family is straight. It's illegal

If Peter had been born a girl, his name would have been Charlotte

Non-Hales

Stiles has identical twin girls that Noah cannot tell apart to save his life. Luckily, Melissa can

To prank Rafael, when Scott was in college he made up fake children named Chad Daniel and Emma. He uses photoshop to send his father their school photos. He did it really poorly too (on purpose) and even after years of this going on, Rafael refuses to believe he doesn't have grandchildren he's never met named Chad Daniel and Emma

Scott names his real daughter Emma, but his son is not named Chad Daniel

As a child, Allison's dream job was dancer

Chris is bisexual, but never really put it together. Allison had to come out for him

After Kira finished her training with the skinwalkers, she left California to earn her degree, but she came back to work in Beacon Hills

Ethan and Aiden's mother is a flight attendant and when she was away, baby Ethan developed a fever. His father didn't know what to do and put him in the fridge to cool down. If Ethan died, his father was going to tell his wife that she was so high on drugs she hallucinated having twins and there was only just Aiden

Theo got heat stroke on a first date because he refused to take off his leather jacket

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As the Christmas crawls towards us, what ridiculous, slightly horrifying holiday tradition do you think the Hales have?

I fully believe that Peter locks himself in the kitchen and just transforms into Sandra Lee (just doing vodka shots while baking), while Talia drives around the neighborhood to scope out everyone else's decorations so they can one-up them next year.

talia and peter are the most unhinged, competitive, gayle waters-waters, unholy abominations of the christmas spirit to unleash on beacon hills.

i refuse to believe otherwise. holidays are totally their thing and they are insane about it.

peter "two shots of vodka" hale makes gingerbread houses and eggnog.

talia plans the christmas card all year. she books a photographer months in advance because sears is for the poors.

peter will sabotage someone's christmas lights so only half of them work and he will watch from his car as the homeowner tries to figure out what happened.

peter has also popped more than one blow-up lawn decoration out of spite.

talia once stole someone's baby jesus after her sugar cookies were insulted at the holiday bake sale.

peter and talia draw up a seating chart and they have included both star signs and myers-briggs to justify it.

talia is that mom that personally gave her kid's teachers presents each year and peter brought his to die for cupcakes for class parties.

these two would rent a santa, create a winter wonderland on their property and let the neighborhood kids take pictures and give little goody bags.

they also did little things like popcorn strings for the tree and decorate it together.

talia kept every ornament the kids made in school and put them on the tree every year.

lastly derek got his own special birthday party so he didn't feel like he had to share with christmas. i feel like this was very important for talia to implement.

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Pendragon siblings since I wouldn’t put it past Uther to have sired Morgause too. For someone so dedicated to his wife he sure has a lot of kids.

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You cannot tell me that if Stiles woke up to this he wouldn't scream and flail himself out of the bed.

All before he even realizes that it's just Derek.

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“So you’re telling me you can’t die?” “No, I’m telling you I can’t stay dead. There’s a difference, Trust me.”

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Merlin fans rise up

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Omfg i hate when i loose fics because i just leave kudos and i dont bookmark them💔

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The Hales i get it but the thing with Cora just bugs me out so much. How could a literal child survive and then ESCAPE TO LATINAMERICA without anyone finding out???

And also a thing that literally sticks to me so much is that the trauma some characters (if not all) have is actually more deep than they make it look, Melissa and Scott for example like you said!

Some of them would’ve had severe anxiety and PTSD after dealing with everything each season.

Also, Malia’s whole character was written a bit awfully. She had poor character growth yet she has so much potential! The Malia she was on the ending of the series isn’t really the same as the movie. She is an awesome character that in addition to the way she actually is, she could’ve been even greater. Kira and Erica too, they had much MUCH potential.

Good greatness, writing or scripting anything related to Teen Wolf ain’t for the weak, i swear to god.

LIKE WHO THE FUCK WROTE THIS SHIT-

Like for real, everything goes in circles in a mess you can’t even comprehend. The Hale family? A complete mistery. Malia’s general thing after she got back??? HOW THE FUCK DID CORA SURVIVE THE FIRE???

And let’s not talk about the way they wrote some characters to then absolutely destroying their growth. And also leaving plotholes everywhere and forgetting the same subplots they made???

But i guess that what makes it fun???

I just take shit from fanfics at this point for ideas to fill the holes the show has😭, like i just made my own Hale Family tree and im pretty sure it isn’t even finished.

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Good greatness, writing or scripting anything related to Teen Wolf ain’t for the weak, i swear to god.

LIKE WHO THE FUCK WROTE THIS SHIT-

Like for real, everything goes in circles in a mess you can’t even comprehend. The Hale family? A complete mistery. Malia’s general thing after she got back??? HOW THE FUCK DID CORA SURVIVE THE FIRE???

And let’s not talk about the way they wrote some characters to then absolutely destroying their growth. And also leaving plotholes everywhere and forgetting the same subplots they made???

But i guess that what makes it fun???

I just take shit from fanfics at this point for ideas to fill the holes the show has😭, like i just made my own Hale Family tree and im pretty sure it isn’t even finished.

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The Hale Family

So, as someone who is an avid enjoyer of all Hales, particularly the Hale men, and is a writer, naturally their wider family comes up when I write. Anywhere between ten and fourteen people died in the Hale fire, not all Werewolves but presumably all family. That is a big ass family.

So, I did what Jeff Davis’s clown lookin’ coward ass couldn’t and I made the full Hale family, further extended family pending because I have too much free time.

Also, they even have birthdays, death dates, and birth years. Fuck you, Jeff.

I won’t be covering Derek, Cora or Malia in particular detail, just giving some basics, because otherwise this post would be.. even longer than it already is.

This took so damn long so.. enjoy

(This timeline works under the assumption that season 6B, when Scott and co are eighteen, takes place in the year 2013, and fuck you all the Hales lived and got to see their full potential so they can have actual personalities.)

Keep reading

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Annabeth: Will you be mine forever?

Percy: Yes

Annabeth: *reaches into her pocket*

Percy: Oh my Gods, it's happening

Annabeth:*takes out a knife*

Percy:

Percy: I thought this was a marriage proposal

Annabeth: No, a blood oath

Percy: Makes sense, go ahead

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teen wolf didn't make stiles a werewolf because they knew he would be finding increasingly absurd ways around all the absurd Werewolf Rules. some bad guy tries to trap him in a circle of mountain ash and he reveals he's been carrying one of these bad boys in his backpack for months