cuntlijah

[cuntlijah]

broke: Laura Lee is annoying and needed to lose her faith and become a lesbian

woke: Laura Lee actually deserves to be the most annoying Christian homo in the world actually. annoy her entire church by being a turbo queer. annoy an entire soccer team of lesbians by being a Jesus freak.

but most importantly…annoy her gfs parents by tricking them into thinking she’s a good little Christian whitegirl influence and then running away with her to start a Lesbians4Jesus nature cult. like jonestown except instead of racial abuse and mass m*rder they all just worship Lottie and have gay sex in the woods

[cuntlijah]

hi it’s lottielee hours again 💔

[cuntlijah]

taishauna queerplatonic friendship I miss u…Scientologist and Jonny d*pp defenders ruin everything

[cuntlijah]

the amt of times young Elijah wood was compared to a female actress (Mischa, Sansa stark, Winona Ryder) im surprised he hasn’t been “transvestigated” yet. when will some twitter degenerate tell me if Elijah wood has a coochie or not

[cuntlijah]

im in tears why would u do that to him

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[cuntlijah]

Okay, not to pit two brothers in Christ against each other, but a real win on C.S. Lewis's part here:

He would give money to beggars over the objection of his great friend Tolkien. 'Jack,' Tolkien would say, 'he's only going to drink it up,' and Lewis would answer, 'well, Tollers, that's exactly what I was going to do with it.'

(James Como also says C.S. Lewis gave away about 70% of his annual income)

[cuntlijah]

[cuntlijah]

"Do you ever wish you could have done things differently?"

*C.S Lewis tearing up as he thinks of dinosaurs in Narnia*

"What's done is done, laddo"

[cuntlijah]

dubious Mordor mushrooms for sure

rare frodo pics part 2

[cuntlijah]

lil bros high as olyphaunt balls in that last one lmao

rare frodo pics part 2

[cuntlijah]

my favorite part about the brave, valiant warrior king of narnia in The Last Battle is that the person he loves most in the world is an exceptionally beautiful and incredibly gentle unicorn named Jewel who has canonically horn-shanked a man to death (he’s a boy unicorn btw)

[cuntlijah]

Tolkien Autism: (sitting in his office in the dark for three days straight) no edith I can’t go to bed until I’ve recorded what each clan of the Elves farts smell like. at first I wanted the Noldorin’s to be cinnamon sandalwood but that contradicted page 3 paragraph 5 of the Ainulindalë so now I’m unable to decide between lilac fields or fresh woodland pine

CS Lewis Autism: hey inklings check out my original fic it’s about my OCs meeting Jesus but he’s a totally badass LION and he’s UNKILLABLE bc he’s got an unlimited god mode status effect (he’s literally god lmao) and he can summon Poseidon and Bacchus and travel through dimensions and gives my—I mean Diggory’s mom a magic apple that cures her cancer and we get revenge on all the kids who bullied me at school and theres unicorns that stab you and dragons and witches and also SANTA CLAUS bc I CAN DO WHATEVER TF I WANT, JOHN!!!!!!

[cuntlijah]

Narnia is so batshit fucking crazy… like everyone knows about Lion Jesus

but few know about Chimpanzee Antichrist (who gets eaten alive by the horrifying eldritch cosmic entity Bird God of Darkness)

[cuntlijah]

Okay so when a bird painting says it’d sell you to satan for one corn chip everyone laughs, but when I, Edmund Pevensie—

[cuntlijah]

Yearly Reminder that C.S Lewis encouraged his fans to write fanfiction about Susan Pevensie becoming a friend to Narnia and reuniting with her family once again.

Literally inviting his fans to write Susan’s adult, angsty character development with a happy ending.

Do your duty fans. Write that fanfiction.

[cuntlijah]

stanning Tolkien and Lewis like some of you bitches stan the Beatles idc idc