dankowsky - Tumblr blog

[dankowsky]

I don't think I wanna sleep tomorrow

And I don't think my body will appreciate it

But im probably gonna do it anyways

[dankowsky]

That was the last we saw of him… 

(via)

[dankowsky]

All Horror references from the music video for CRUISR’s - All Over

All movies under the cut

Keep reading

[dankowsky]

🙋🙋🙋

why now

[dankowsky]

America is the world’s largest terrorist state.

[dankowsky]

[dankowsky]

And this is translated in English, so how the fuck does that help me

[dankowsky]

This is single-handly the funniest truth that ever done truthed

Manga: All Day Jo Ayoung

[dankowsky]

I'm sure as hell not going out, but would it be a crime to use GrubHub during a Winter Weather Warning...?

At least that's who I assume every car that isn't a plow is

[dankowsky]

I put WAY more time and energy into this than I intended. I should've been asleep twenty minutes ago...

My Stupid ADHD brain after hearing this scene in Harry Potter:

Harry: Yeah, but what’s the point?

Mr. Weasly: The point?! Harry, they’re Death Eaters! There is no point!

*Scene cuts to the Death Eaters in a company meeting*

Voldermort: Thanks to everyone for showing up on time today. It’s nice to know everyone is still devoted to the cause, which I truly wish would’ve reflected in last quarter’s statistics: fear in wizards is up again this quarter is up again, which is great, but muggle torturing is still below quota; I’m looking your way Dolohov. C'mon guys. We CANNOT run this on name alone. Remember our motto: “Death Eaters. Not Shit Eaters.” Now, I’m hoping to get our educational unit up as soon as Snape can secure us a position for the Carrows: Snape? How’s that coming along? We CANNOT have another Barty Crouch Jr.

Voldermort: Moving onto this months goals for twarting Harry Potter in increasingly traumatic ways– Has anyone seen Malfoy?

*Malfoy bursts through a door"

Malfoy: I’m so sorry, Dark Lord. Traffic was insane this morning. The morning floo network traffic is absolutely ridiculous.

Voldermort: … This is your house.

[dankowsky]

My Stupid ADHD brain after hearing this scene in Harry Potter:

Harry: Yeah, but what's the point?

Mr. Weasly: The point?! Harry, they're Death Eaters! There is no point!

*Scene cuts to the Death Eaters in a company meeting*

Voldermort: Thanks to everyone for showing up on time today. It's nice to know everyone is still devoted to the cause, which I truly wish would've reflected in last quarter's statistics: fear in wizards is up again this quarter is up again, which is great, but muggle torturing is still below quota; I'm looking your way Dolohov. C'mon guys. We CANNOT run this on name alone. Remember our motto: "Death Eaters. Not Shit Eaters." Now, I'm hoping to get our educational unit up as soon as Snape can secure us a position for the Carrows: Snape? How's that coming along? We CANNOT have another Barty Crouch Jr.

Voldermort: Moving onto this months goals for twarting Harry Potter in increasingly traumatic ways-- Has anyone seen Malfoy?

*Malfoy bursts through a door"

Malfoy: I'm so sorry, Dark Lord. Traffic was insane this morning. The morning floo network traffic is absolutely ridiculous.

Voldermort: ... This is your house.

[dankowsky]

Or maybe it was that it's saturated fats was three sizes too small

youre a mean one

mister

[dankowsky]

*the two sides of my brain talking about something I just wrote*

Anime: Aho Girl

[dankowsky]

👏... 👏... 👏

Anime: Imōto Sae Ireba Ii

[dankowsky]

[dankowsky]

I had an epiphany

[dankowsky]

my wife’s so cute because we both love animals so much but her way is very pure and genuine whereas my family is:

me, holding up my cat: stinky

wife: no!! don’t be mean!!!

me, swaying him back and forth in the air: stinky bastard man

wife: No!!!!!!!!

my mother, not looking up from chopping veggies: naughty boy. brat cat

wife, distraught: NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!