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Shady as F*ck [Season 1, Ep. 5]

To recap: In the previous episode, Issa found herself back in Daniel’s face despite successfully avoiding him after an awkward encounter. Lawrence is finding emotional solace in Tasha the bank teller. And I feel like it’s my duty as a citizen of the United States to remind y’all that Molly is dating Jidenna.

This episode was written by Ben Dougan and directed by Melina Matsoukas.

Issa panics about the students knowing about her “Broken Pussy” rap at open mic night. This is the catalyst for her reuniting with Daniel. I think the build-up to get Issa back alone with Daniel was a clunky transition but kids making a meme out of you rapping “Broken Pussy” is embarrassing. So we’ll go with it.

Issa spends the entire day worried about her boss finding out about it. She talks with Lawrence previously, who assures her that the kids won’t remember it. Memes are a dime a dozen. And if you spend any time on any social media platform, you’ll find yourself going along with the extremely fast pace of memeing people. Either way, these bad-ass kids don’t forget it.

Issa takes refuge in Molly to use her fancy attorney skills but this becomes a moment where Molly inserts herself back into Jered’s life to inquire about who could possibly have uploaded the video. Molly’s just using Issa’s plight as an excuse to speak to an ex that clearly she still has feelings for.

I have to say, this was the moment I found myself asking if Molly and Issa were actually as close as the show was trying to convince us but I digress…

Although Molly is calling up Jered, she’s in the middle of a situationship with Chris (aka Jidenna) and trying very hard to make an unofficial thing official. Through a very awkward exchange of talking but not out loud, Molly invites Chris to an engagement party. From what I can assume, they spent the weekend together after having their first date?

We’re only five episodes in but Molly is very desperate for this particular type of relationship that’s honestly headed nowhere. Her obsession with the man being perfect on paper is actually backfiring on her. Also, men are just dumb. And Molly’s giving them way too much.

While Molly is rekindling her friendship with Jered, Issa is now venting about her “Broken Pussy” problem with Daniel. He promises that he’ll take care of it for her...which is an empty promise to be fair because nobody is doing a modicum of the research required to find who could have shared the picture. He asks her to drop her off at the studio and they end up spending the entire day together. Issa refuses to speak up and say no to Daniel because she simply does not want to. That’s the truth of it. She kept walking around and following behind because that is exactly what she wanted to do. No amounts of freestyle rap in the car or the staff bathroom are going to ever fix that.

Lawrence has lunch with Chad who tells him that he’s getting married. It seems out of the blue because it is and because Chad is the type of man that does not hesitate to do things he feels may be the right choice, even if they might be wrong. Anyway, he asks Lawrence about Issa and marriage and Lawrence says that he’s trying to get his shit together. Chad actually offers some decent advice because he feels like Lawrence is shuffling his feet. If he really wants to be with Issa on paper they could just “get their shit together - together.”

Later on, Tasha the bank teller comes to flirt with Lawrence who politely rejects her advances but feels pretty good about himself knowing that a baddie was throwing it at him. Tasha the Bank Teller IS a baddie.

Molly spends her day getting ready for her coworker’s engagement party while Chris aka Jidenna doesn’t seem invested in actually going. Later at the party though, he swoops in to save the day. Molly is swooning by now because he claims the title of “boyfriend” but later admits that he definitely did not mean that when Molly asked him if he was serious.

The conversation basically went:

Molly: Why did you say that if you didn’t mean it? Chris: Because you needed a win.

I would never let a man, let alone a light-skin one disrespect me like this! But whatever, Molly was pushing up on him to make something out of nothing but he didn’t actually speak up and tell her not to rush into things so this isn’t entirely Molly’s fault. Sometimes, people can smell the desperation and continue to stick around despite that. It’s unhealthy and I never understood doing it as an excuse of not wanting to hurt someone’s feelings because eventually, that will happen. That’s just life. The band aid still pulls the skin no matter how fast or slow you do it.

Hurt, Molly tells him to leave and spends the rest of the night getting drunk. Instead of calling Issa, she goes to Jered’s house for some pity sex. Jered ain’t buying it and puts her ass on the couch to sleep. Jered is really too good for the Insecure universe. Shout out to Jered watching an episode of 'Conjugal Visits' with a nice cameo from Leah A. Williams who played Dolores 'Sister Mary' Clarence on The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl.

At Daniel’s studio, Issa attempts to head out but Daniel asks her to stay and have a drink. She stays. Hmm. They reminisce a little bit. Daniel then encourages Issa to rap in the booth. It’s met with hesitation but eventually, she does and finds complete solace in it. The best thing about Daniel is that he really does bring out the best in Issa but also the absolute worst. As we eventually see.

They talk about the hows and whys of why a relationship never came to be and this leads to them being booty-butt naked in his studio having sex. Issa had to have seen this coming, no matter WHAT she says in the future episodes. Whatever the case may be… she’s done it now.

Issa goes into the bathroom to clean up and gets post-nut clarity. Yes girl, you are a dirty ass cheater! One of my favorite songs (St. Beauty’s “Borders”) plays as she has the walk of supreme shame. I mean, she cheated. That shit’s shameful.

My final thought is a controversial one, I liked that the episode ended with Issa cheating. Mainly because I love mess but also because so often, we don’t see female characters make terrible ass decisions like this. As someone who is working on a novel where the female protagonist cheats on her spouse, I really spent years fighting with the decision because I was afraid of how readers would receive her.

It can’t be stated enough that genuinely written characters are like real people. They fuck up. They make really bad choices that come to bite them in the ass later. It was a risky choice, I’m sure but I think Issa Rae and the writers room did something really good here. It speaks about Issa as a person and her relationship with Lawrence, which is honestly still going nowhere at this point. And her inability to listen (based on Molly’s advice falling on deaf ears) when she wants to do something even if it’s a bad decision. It builds characters. And yes, even when the character chooses not to listen to good advice.

Plus, she got hers. And I’ll cheer for that.

Not the cheating though.

[davalynbaker]

Music from season 1, episode 4. I didn’t forget to search the songs but I did forget to post! You can find the artists on Spotify and Apple Music. 1500 or Nothin doesn’t have any other music on Spotify with the exception of “Girl,” which is featured on the Insecure soundtrack.

Full list in this episode behind the cut!

Erimaj - Conflict of a Man Thundercat - Them Changes Kari Faux - Lie 2 My Face 1500 or Nothin’ - Girl Leisure - Got It Bad Vince Staples - North North

[davalynbaker]

Thirsty as F*ck [Season 1, Ep. 4]

Congratulations, you made it to the end of 2020. And in doing that, you’ve accomplished something that took a lot of willpower and strength to get through—Pat yourselves on the back. And get into this episode.

Now realizing that this entire decade seems to be strife with chaos, ignore that first paragraph. I was so ignorant. And oh, so naive.

This episode is written by Laura Kittrell and directed by Kevin Bray.

The episode opens with Lawrence jogging to “Conflict of a Man” by Erimaj. We get some great scenic shots of South LA that are beyond stunning. As he finishes his jog and heads back home, he passes the stained couch from the previous episode sitting on the curb. Surprisingly, no one has picked it up yet, and it’s there as a harsh but real reminder that their relationship has so much work that they have to accomplish. I’m not sure why they threw out the couch before they purchased another one, but he goes in, and there’s a broken lawn chair in its place. Inside, Issa is taking a shower, but she gets a glimpse of sweaty Lawrence from his jog that initiates awkward shower sex. Shout out to one of the many appearances of Jay Ellis’ little booty.

Whoever tried to sell us on the appeal of shower sex needs to atone for their sins.

Giving in, Issa and Lawrence go shopping for a new couch. You can see from their interactions - compared to the first episode. They are very much revisiting their honeymoon phase. While they are in post-let’s-work-it-out bliss, they watch a married couple fight about lotion dispensers.

Best line of the episode, a disgruntled wife says dryly to her husband: “I hate you.”

Later that day, Molly is on her date with super hot doc, Brandon Bell [Troy Fairbanks, if you watch Dear White People], and they’re having typical date conversations. It gets weird when Molly tells him that he needs to be considerate and let her know where he’s headed via text. We later learn that this is date three so there hasn’t been anything explicitly hinting at them being legitimate. They were still having a “get to know you” conversation, so needing to know someone’s whereabouts is strange, but Dr. Hottie definitely could have made that vocal, too. Anyway, Molly is just going through the dating process. It’s not that deep. Hot men come and go.

The next day she walks past a loud-ass Da Da, noting that “black people stay loud.”

It’s me. I’m black people.

On Issa’s end, she gets a surprise visit from Daniel at work. He is consistently overstepping his boundaries. Literal Kill Bill sirens go off in my head at the very notion of someone showing up at my job without announcement. He apologizes for what happened that night in the car. If you need me to refresh your memories, Issa kissed Daniel after “breaking up” with Lawrence, and she told Daniel she wasn’t sure if she was ready to pursue anything serious. Daniel immediately shuts that down and says that she would be nothing more than a booty call.

It was awkward. It was sad. You know the story.

Issa takes this moment to tell him that she’s back with Lawrence now, and they shuffle through the rest of their conversation in a series of strange little moments. Molly rightfully criticizes her for even entertaining the idea of flirting with Daniel, and Issa agrees, saying that she is now “Bloop-bloop”-ing with Lawrence. ***Bloop-blooping is signifying the elevation of them trying to work through their relationship.

Lawrence goes to work and gets assigned to a section he has no experience in by his boss. Also, something that was very triggering to hear, “You’re smart. You’ll catch on.” Being forced to take on other jobs you lack training on is so common that I knew there was a collective sigh when Lawrence’s boss said that to him. Of course, Lawrence can’t quit the job out of frustration because he needs the money! He’s been depending on Issa for too long. Sometimes, you just have to suck it up and become a corporate servant. And for Lawrence, who has spent well over a year being jobless because pride would not let him give in to a job, it’s pretty damn ironic that he’s now at a job doing every single thing he said he never would do. Welcome to adulthood.

As Freida and Issa bond after work, she suggests that Issa use Daniel for their kids’ career day. Issa texts Daniel instead of telling Freida that she isn’t comfortable doing that? Before I knew what was going to happen in the show, I knew what was going to happen in the show.

Does that make sense?

Molly is now on a date with Jidenna, and they bond over microaggressions and white folks at work. He cheers her up with a round of “black tax” jokes, then the two dance to “Girl,” and the romance begins to bloom between them.

After Issa’s after-work session and bonding with Freida (and her text to Daniel), she comes home to Lawrence, who asks her about work, but she casually forgets to mention that Daniel is coming to the career day they’ve planned for the kids. Alright, so Issa actively possesses guilt about Daniel. She hasn’t told Lawrence about the kiss, and now she’s purposely keeping secrets about Daniel from him. It is fascinating to witness Issa plant these seeds of being a dishonest spouse. What is the point of telling Lawrence you want to make it work when you’re still going to lie to him? Even worse, the next day, Lawrence is not telling Issa about Tasha. Is it common for couples to keep things like this from each other? I feel as though if it’s harmless, then mentioning them should not be an issue.

Nevertheless, Lawrence sits with Tasha and enjoys the praises she gives him up which. At this point, Issa is trying her best to help with his confidence, so I don’t know why he feels like he still needs to hold on to Tasha for this. Because let’s be honest, that’s the only reason he’s holding on to Tasha.

After Molly’s date with Jidenna, she tells her boss that she doesn’t feel comfortable talking to Da Da about her behavior. So the boss decides to do it. Molly later sees all the partners ganging up on Da Da in the conference room, and it’s not looking good. Molly’s conversation with Da Da earlier about assimilating to fit in with the white people has come full circle, but Molly feels more sympathetic than vindicated. Da Da is learning about corporate white folks the hard way. We’ve all been there.

It’s career day, and Daniel is sharing his garbage-ass beats with the kids. After some fun and conversations about his job, he tells the kids how amazing Issa is, and they joke that he has a crush on her. Kids have the best intuition, so they are picking up on the chemistry stirring between the two. After the successful career day, Daniel extends an invitation to a studio session, and Issa doesn’t say yes or no. Because why? She likes making bad decisions.

Now that her head is rightly all messed up about Daniel, she fantasizes about him in the staff mirror. As we all know, it’s her subconscious telling her about her lingering feelings for Daniel. They never really left, and she’s starting to lean in too closely to the chaos. Daniel mentioned earlier that he worked on some beats for Ty Dolla $ign, so of course, Ty Dolla $ign makes an appearance in this fantasy. Lawrence interjects, asking her what she’s doing, but it’s revealed to actually be Molly.

Being the voice of reason.

Again.

Her attempts to keep Issa grounded are not going well.

And to the surprise of no one, the kids at school find Issa’s “Broken Pussy” video and laugh about it. Millennials. I think the most realistic thing about this show is the many L’s Millennials take. Nothing has felt more relatable.

[davalynbaker]

As always, great choices by the music team. You can find these songs and artists on Spotify and Apple Music. List behind the cut.

KING - In the Meantime The Internet - Just Sayin/I Tried Blood Orange - Desirée Kari Faux - Supplier Mocky - Weather the Storm Erykah Badu - I Been Going Thru It All

[davalynbaker]

racist as f*ck (se01-ep03)

Here we are, back at it again. Episode three. Advanced apologies because this summer has been a doozy. I lost my great-grandmother in June (every day without her feels surreal) and after some inner debate against that good old IMPOSTER SYNDROME, I went back to school to finish getting my bachelor degree.

The adventure through school is a blog post for another day but I’m here to talk about Insecure so let’s get to that.

This episode was written by Dayna Lynne North and directed by Melina Matsoukas.

Music used in the episode here.

Issa goes back home but her reunion with Lawrence is a series of very awkward events. They haven’t worked through anything! The whole issue throughout this entire season is how incredibly shitty these two are when it comes to communication. I swear to god, watching them interact with each other was stressing me out.

In the middle of all this, Issa and Lawrence are suffering with work woes. Lawrence’s head hunter basically tells him that he needs to dial it back even though the advice falls on his stubborn and deaf ears. Meanwhile, Issa walks in on a group conversation (Freida included) about her that’s clearly about her.

“They’re having secret white meetings and they’re sending secret white emails.”

There isn’t one black woman that has worked in a predominantly white space that’s walked around with a scarlet letter tattooed on their forehead after making one mistake while their white coworkers are given several chances for improvement. It’s just one of the many complexities of systemic racism in the workplace. 

What else is new?

At home, Issa explains her frustrations to Lawrence but he gives her the generic, “You have to work twice as hard to prove them wrong.” It’s not very supportive and when he turns around and explains to Issa about his own struggles with the head hunter, he is met with indifference. Issa absolutely should have listened to him because his feelings are also valid but every day, it’s the same conversation about the same damn problem. Lawrence, need to get over this shit and get a fucking job.

Nobody wants to choose a job that they feel will set them back a few paces. I never planned to do admin work in my thirties either but bills need to be paid. Issa tells him that she agrees with the head hunter and Lawrence doesn’t give much push back. I’m sure at this moment, he feels guilty for not offering the emotional and financial support that Issa needs but Issa also could have been a more supportive partner in this situation. There’s nothing more frustrating in the world than knowing you are qualified and will work hard for these jobs, only to be met with so many dead ends. That couldn’t be easy for Lawrence. (I can’t believe I’m actually defending him)

Trying to make it work, Lawrence offers to get a bite to eat but Isssa declines and goes off to have dinner with Molly.

After expressing her Lawrence woes, Molly gives Issa the “Love is a two way street” speech and Issa is not in the mood to hear that. Molly made a lot of sense in that situation but don’t worry, that’s the last time I’ll be saying that in this update.

Later, Molly and Issa join a group of friends and we meet the rest of the quartet: Tiffany (Amanda Seales) (along with her husband Derek [Wade Allain-Marcus]) and Kelli (Natasha Rothwell). In short, Tiffany is the bougie one and Kelli is the horny one. Not much of that changes until the most current season when Tiffany is given a really great storyline. Kelli, not so much.

Molly is still trying to figure out how she feels about Jered, so she invites him to this friend circle so everyone can also gage their opinions of him. They immediately fall in love with him. He’s charismatic and easy-going while also doting on Molly. But then she finds out that he’s never been to college and suddenly shifts her views on pursuing a relationship with him.

We’re only three episodes in and I’m already tired.

The next day, Issa has a beach day for the kids. One of my favorite scenes in this episode is when the kids replace “bitch” with “beach” because kids are little shits BUT THEY’RE JUST SO FUNNY. Quick shout out to Too $hort as one of the kids goes, “What’s my favorite word? BEACH!” That got a good laugh out of me.  Her beach day is successful and she basically proves her racist white coworkers wrong and gets an apology from Frieda in the process.

As Issa is at beach day, Lawrence visits his favorite bank teller, who I lovingly coined Titty Tasha. No, I’m serious. Tasha is fine as hell. Lawrence laments to her about finding a job or lack thereof, but Tasha boosts him and strokes his ego which is really all he wanted from Issa. 

But also, like I said, Tasha has big boobs and Lawrence may think he’s just being friendly but he’s not fooling me. He’s not fooling anybody with enough sense to know what his aim is. He even purposely lets someone skip him in the line so he can speak to Tasha. 

Men are funny.

While Issa is succeeding at beach day and Lawrence is subconsciously flirting with Tasha, Molly is harassing her black coworker. I mean, she wasn’t necessarily harassing the poor woman but the fact that she stayed quiet when Rashida or “Da Da” as she liked being called was introduced and her white coworker said he didn’t see color, just someone that was going to be getting her coffee makes this even more strange. 

Molly represents a very particular kind of elite black person and they always get on my nerves. I’ve had bosses like this, teachers and principals, classmates, family members… you name it. They hide behind these weird politics and ideals of how black people are supposed to behave around white folks all in the name of, “can’t let them see us being too authentic.” Girl, fuck these white people. Your white coworkers get raises and praise for doing half the work you do and you’re worried about a black girl that refuses to code switch to get ahead? Sounds like jealousy to me. 

Anyway, Da Da rightfully tells her off and Molly doesn’t take that as a moment to reflect but only to be self-righteous. This could have possibly marked the beginning of my dislike for this character, to be honest.

Also, seeming to just not “get it,” Molly gets accepted into the elite Black People Meet website called “The League” and calls Issa to boast about it. Issa wonders why she is still doing this after she spent a whole ass night trying to see how her closest friends felt about Jered. Molly’s reasoning is that The League has a better group of black men to date since Jered didn’t go to college. 

And yes, we know that’s a stupid reason but there’s a deeper layer of self-sabotage here concerning Molly. 

Issa basically points out how ridiculous this is, but Molly just doesn’t think Issa gets it. Or at least, Molly doesn’t want to hear Issa be honest with her. So she goes on her date but just before she heads inside, she tells Jered she just wants to be friends. Molly is counting a chicken before the egg hatches - which is just one of the many characteristics given to her. No, I don’t like Molly but I think it’s a testament to great writing that they do something so simple with this character because it will be something that appears in future episodes.

After her successful beach day, Issa comes home to find Lawrence fixing dinner but she’s got takeout in her hands. Damn, you guys can’t even properly communicate about dinner. 

Issa puts the dinner away with some frustration but chooses to eat the dinner that Lawrence prepared on the couch. This very obviously pisses Lawrence off because they really need to have a talk about her running away and him being a bum, so an argument ensues. Issa spills food on the couch and Lawrence uses the couch as a symbolism for the giant ass stain in their relationship. He blurts out that he’s trying and she’s not supporting and Issa has a moment of realization after a montage of when they first purchased the couch (and were happy) up to the present (when they are not) while Mocky’s “Weather the Storm” plays on. God, this scene was so good because we see this couple, who once loved each other so much, slowly fall apart as the singer’s haunting voice floats from scene to scene.

Issa tells Lawrence that she’s sorry and she is going to try and do better while Lawrence admits his faults and agrees. They toss out the couch and buy a new one because you know, symbolism and all.

New couch! New beginnings!

Or something like that…

In the meantime, I’ll be back with another recap and discussion of the episode!

[davalynbaker]

No episode discussion today, guys. Thanks for following and supporting this blog. Now please help and support my people. Anyway you can. Thank you.

[davalynbaker]

messy as f*ck (se01-ep02)

Coming back to ten people following this account has been a true blessing. Thank you guys for being interested in these blog posts and recaps and sticking with me.

We’re going to get right into it and episode two picks up right where it left off. Issa returns to Molly, they make up, and she spends the night at her best friend’s apartment.

This episode was written by Issa Rae and directed by Cecile Emeke. Music used in this episode.

After Issa’s non-confrontational half break-up with Lawrence, her night out embarrassing - apologizing - and then making up with Molly, while also kissing her high school crush Daniel, we start the next episode. It begins with Issa giving her reflection a rap or pep talk, if you will about Lawrence.

It’s nice seeing elements from the web series be incorporated into the tv series.

So, the rap begins as such:

Do you want your man or nah? Do you know your plans or nah?

Now that we know Issa feels as though she’s sitting on the hill of a dying relationship with a job that no longer fulfils her, she truly feels lost. 

She wants better for herself but she doesn’t really where to begin to achieve it. I love that there is a common denominator amongst my fellow Millennials: The Existential Crisis. Some of us suffer them more than others but are you truly a Millennial if you haven’t asked your reflection just what the fuck you’re doing with your life?

As a Pisces, I do this once a week.

While Issa questions the status of her relationship through freestyle rap, Molly interrupts her so they can get breakfast.

Over breakfast, Molly chides Issa for not taking action with Daniel after the entire night, not yet knowing that Issa and Daniel kissed. I mean, I’m with Molly here - if you’re going to embarrass me at the expense of jokes, the very least you could do was stick the landing. But I digress! Issa explains to Molly that it gave her an adrenaline rush and perhaps, it’s time to live her life to the fullest. She wants to accept and tackle the challenges that life throws her.

Molly, being the good friend that she is, tells Issa that she used to be that way, joking about their college days. To me, their conversations together over good food is the most real aspect of this show and they are written and acted so well. 

Molly tells Issa that she can go on any journey just as long as it isn’t at her expense and Issa once again apologizes (she should) for her behavior at the club. Molly admits that she just may be suffering from “broken pussy” and dedicates the day to some self-care, including a vajacial (that she saw on Draya’s instagram) to help her overcome her issues. Avoiding Lawrence, Issa decides to join Molly for her self-care excursion.

She admits to Molly that she’s not being fulfilled by Lawrence after Molly implies that he is “THE ONE.” 

Molly: But I like Lawrence! Issa: Bitch. I love him.

As discussed in the previous post, Molly projects her personal feelings about relationships onto Issa’s relationship with Lawrence. Whether or not Issa wants to try and make things work with Lawrence or if she’s chosen to move on to something that she thinks would be better for her, it is important that Molly offer a support system and not make the situation about herself. But I do understand why Molly is upset. While it’s only been one episode, we see that her being single while her friends and coworkers have relationships really bothers her. It gives her existential dread (shout out to my fellow Millennials!) that she’ll spend the rest of her life alone.

In an attempt to show Issa how much being single sucks, she takes her through the ABCs of dating apps. (Dating does suck though.) Naturally, it puts her off. In the middle of her education about online dating, Molly receives a phone call from Lawrence and Issa tells her to ignore it. 

Lawrence, lamenting about ruining Issa’s birthday, calls his best friend Chad (Neil Brown Jr.) and the two attempt to catch up. The problem? Lawrence calls Chad (unknowingly) while he’s at a bar watching a game with a group of friends. From the sounds of their introductions, these two men haven’t spoken to each other in a while. Lawrence talks about how he *thinks* he messed up Issa’s birthday - oh no, you definitely did mess it up - but Chad is too focused on the game to really give Lawrence the attention he needs.

Lawrence calling Chad after a great length of time only to vent about messing up Issa’s birthday is a shitty way of checking up on your friends. I can’t blame Chad for being inattentive and unfocused, especially if they hadn’t talked to each other in quite some time.

Am I correct in discovering that not only is Lawrence a bad boyfriend but also kind of bad at being a best friend too? Don’t do this to your friends. In fact, you need to stop what you’re doing right now and check on your people. And obviously, you need to come back to this website and finish reading this blog post too.

On the better best friend front, Issa is hanging around Molly like a kid sister that tags along until Molly checks her and tells her that she needs to be a grown-up and talk with Lawrence. Does Issa do this though? Of course not. She has a talk with her reflection just outside her apartments and speeds off deciding that she is not ready to face him.

It costs absolutely nothing to send a text, which is what Issa should have done and it would have saved them from the conflict that followed.

Nevertheless, Lawrence goes on a hunt in Rite Aid to purchase items for Issa’s birthday (days later) and bumps into her buying overnight items and toiletries. It’s a coincidence, albeit a pretty bad one and when Lawrence confronts her with an apology about messing up her birthday, Issa tells him that the problem runs much deeper than messing up a birthday.

Confused, Lawrence angrily and loudly questions her right in the middle of Rite Aid. He demands to know if Issa is coming but the confrontation obviously goes unsuccessfully and also scares Issa off.

Lawrence, what are we going to do with you? You’ve been latching on to Issa to be the emotional and financial support in this relationship for years. She takes some time away for herself and you berate her in the middle of Rite Aid? And Issa, speak up! Tell this man what is bothering you and what’s not working. Watching these two in the first season just dance circles around their problems has to be one of the most infuriating things about the show, But a series cannot exist without conflict so we endure it.

Molly comes home from her cancelled vajacial to find Issa chilling on the couch with her dog Flavor Flav. By the way, what happened to Flavor Flav? He was a cute little dog!

Side note: We see the beginning of the series in a series spoofs with Issa watching an episode of a tv show called “Conjugal Visits.”

Molly is surprised to find Issa sitting on the couch and asks her about Lawrence. Issa confesses to Molly that something *did* happen with Daniel but they only kissed. Molly teases her for a while until the conversation shifts to work and Issa says that since she’s on an adrenaline rush kick she is simply going to wing her presentation at work.

Which of course, we all know does not go well.

There is definitely a time and a place to wing it but a presentation at work is not one of them. After suffering in silence through a montage of microaggressions from her non-black coworkers, it falls through - even resulting in a come to Jesus meeting between Issa and her boss. I hate just about all of Issa’s co-workers except Frieda (Lisa Joyce), a well meaning white woman that Issa is partnered up with to create these projects. 

Shout out to Sujata Day (aka CeCe from Awkward Black Girl) in this episode as work enemy Sarah. It was fun seeing her and Issa on-screen together again but it did break my heart to discover their characters wouldn’t be getting along. 

Issa and Frieda spend the afternoon post-work, brainstorming together about projects for their outreach program.

Feeling miserable, Lawrence throws away all the birthday stuff he purchased for Issa away and has an encounter with Thug Yoda (Tristen J. Winger aka Baby Voice Darius on Awkward Black Girl). Lawrence gives Thug Yoda an update on his relationship with Issa and Thug Yoda breaks it down very clearly for Lawrence. You’re dumping a lot on this woman and you’re not even giving her the goods properly. It puts a lot of things in perspective for Lawrence but Issa is still avoiding his calls. Thug Yoda offers a girlfriend for Issa which begins a running joke for his character as the show progresses.

At Molly’s job, her coworker is congratulating her for handling a case and client very well. In the middle of this, Molly’s boss comes in and congratulates the same coworker on her proposal, stepping over Molly despite the work she had achieved that day. It very clearly upsets Molly and she feels inadequate knowing that they have overlooked her hard work but have no problem uplifting her coworker about her proposal.

Molly’s insecurities are wrapped up tightly around her desire to be in a successful relationship. There’s nothing wrong with her wanting a partner but the irony in her saying that she truly is suffering from “broken pussy” and not just obsessed with being somebody’s girlfriend is interesting to witness. It’s not a “broken pussy” but mostly a broken mentality about the importance of romantic relationships.

Molly later goes on a date with a man she meets on one of the dating apps and the date goes well until it ends with the man asking Molly if they’re finishing this date with “fucking.” 

Props to this man for being upfront and honest about what he wants but goddamn, how frustrating is it to meet someone and hit it off with them only to have the rug snatched right from under you? In this moment, Molly realizes it’s not her pussy that’s broken but the men she’s going on these dates with. Her aha! moment, if you will. I’m so thankful that it only took two episodes for her to figure this out.

After the terrible date, Molly takes Flavor Flav for a walk (seriously though, where is this dog now?) and bumps into Jered who jokingly reminds her about the “Broken Pussy” rap. They start talking and the chemistry goes right back.

Still working late, Issa receives a text from Lawrence if she’s coming home. This prompts her to go into the staff bathroom to have a hilarious imaginary fight with him to get her thoughts together. Have we not all been there before? Are still there now? We’re trying to piece the things we’re going to say out loud to stand our ground. 

Usually, we don’t end up saying any of those things but it’s nice to pretend sometimes.

Seeing characters have imaginary fights with their reflection always sticks close to me because I’ve spent a lot of my mornings before work having imaginary fights about times I’ve felt shafted at my job. And then of course, I grab my keys and try to make sure that day goes as fast as I can make it. 

If anyone wants to hire a writer, I’m here! And I can work remotely!

After the imaginary fight comes to a crashing halt, Issa realizes that there is still a spark there for him and she decides now is the time to talk to him. When she arrives home, Lawrence is sitting watching television and Issa comes to sit next to him. It’s a naturally awkward procession between a young couple trying to work through their problems. He says that he has an interview lined up and Issa congratulates him. They share a joke about Thug Yoda then the two of them go quiet. Very quiet.

And the episode ends. 

What are my final thoughts for this episode? It’s important to demand your space and time away from a person. You are absolutely entitled to that but people cannot read your mind (no matter how much we want them to sometimes) and it’s important to communicate that effectively.

Also, don’t live through your friends’ relationships. What can seem like a good time to you may be hell on the other side of the fence.

See y’all next Sunday!

[davalynbaker]

Season 1, Episode 2 did not feature as many songs as the first episode but it did have two of my favorite musicians on it this time around. I love D’Angelo and Thundercat so much. It also introduced me to Sophie Beem.

Full artist and titles can be found after the cut. You can find all these artists on Spotify and Apple Music!

Sophie Beem - Nail Polish (Sophie Beem) Dâm-Funk - Burn Straight Through U (Toeachizown) D’Angelo and The Vanguard Sugah Daddy (Black Messiah) Audra the Rapper - Pimpin’ (Retrospectrum) Bosco - Gold Ghost (Boy) Thundercat - Heartbreaks + Setbacks (Apocalypse)

[davalynbaker]

insecure as f*ck (se01-ep01)

As all seven of you know (thank you for the add!), I set out on revisiting Issa’s past relationships to see how her and Molly got to where they are now. It’s actually kind of funny to see the way Issa and Molly’s lives have done a bit of a switch over the past four seasons. The best way this show can be revisited is through an abridged timeline so let’s get to the chaos.

Episode one is written by Issa Rae & Larry Wilmore, while being directed by Melina Matsoukas. Music used in this episode. 

Our protagonist, Issa (Issa Rae) introduces us to her story through the form of narration. (an homage to the youtube series, Awkward Black Girl) We learn that it’s her birthday, she’s at a job she hates, and in a relationship she hates even more. She laments about not being as successful or well-liked as her best friend Molly (Yvonne Orji). All these things are true with the exception of her love life which is pretty much in the pits.

After having a not so great day at work, Issa’s high school crush, Daniel (Y’lan Noel), hits her up and tells her happy birthday and the simple gesture has her fantasizing about dating him instead of her current boyfriend. It doesn’t play out like this but you can definitely see it in the eyes.

Molly treats Issa to a birthday dinner but it’s really just an outing where she complains about her relationship problems. Though Issa didn’t mind because Molly catches herself and realizes what she’s doing, it really has to suck spending your birthday consoling everyone around you.

Molly complains that she’s having a hard time dating and Issa jokes that maybe she has a “broken pussy.” These scenes are my favorite in the series, where it’s best friends sitting around talking shit and getting full of liquor. When their dinner is over, Issa confesses that she wants to break up with Lawrence and gets heavy criticism from her friend. Molly has issues projecting her own feelings onto other people’s situations. Let your best friend complain, damn. It’s her birthday! Also, what is it with people telling you not to break up with someone not romantically compatible with you just to avoid living the single life. Molly was so heavily obsessed with being in a relationship from the very beginning that she was willing to try and talk her friend out of breaking up with a partner that was pretty much dead weight at this point. 

Y’all, if you’re reading this: don’t do that to your friends. Let them get their feelings out and give them sound advice, if you can*. A sound piece of advice from me to you is that it isn’t always about you.

We’re then introduced to Lawrence (Jay Ellis), who is supposed to spend the rest of the evening with Issa for her birthday. He gives her what I like to call a dry as hell “happy birthday” and when she realizes he’s not dressed to go out, he begins to talk about how he failed his job interview and just isn’t in the mood to celebrate. So what does she do? She sits on the couch with this grown man and spends the rest of the birthday comforting him.

We meet this couple five years into their relationship and nothing has happened to show Issa that it’s headed anywhere. Imagine spending five years of your life with someone and feeling like you wasted most of them. Let’s do some quick math here: If Issa is turning twenty-nine and she’s been with Lawrence for five years now, it’s safe to say that she met him either near the end of college or right when she was out of it. He’s possibly been jobless the majority of that time and been taking a job interview here and there while Issa carries the load of this relationship the entire time. 

Now does that add up?

Earlier in the episode, Issa lets the audience know that she’s “aggressively passive” which, in short, means that she does not know how to effectively communicate when she has a problem. Knowing this, I can see why Lawrence feels comfortable lying on the couch complaining about one job interview and not taking his girlfriend out on her birthday. But Issa, you need to speak up. You can’t be miserable at both work and home - a home that you’re solely paying the rent and utilities for.

It’s MY opinion that Lawrence is sticking around because he’s comfortable and essentially, has no other place to go. He has no job, he has no motivation, and he really has nothing much to offer. He doesn't even offer Issa emotional support. He didn’t ask her how her day was, if her birthday was good, if her coworkers even did anything for her…

Issa and Lawrence are both depressed but it’s doubly frustrating when there’s an imbalance in support. Job hunting is stressful, trust me. And considering that in the real world, we’re currently smack dab in the middle of a pandemic it’s oh so much worse. However, I think we can agree that not doing something for your girlfriend’s birthday because you failed a job interview is pretty shitty. If I were Issa I’d be happy that my high school crush is sending me DMS too. Lawrence’s inability to give Issa the things she feels she needs out of a relationship pushes her closer to Daniel. 

Molly has a rough day at work after finding out her coworker is engaged while she’s being paid dust by men in her life so Issa uses that as an excuse to go to a club because Daniel is producing one of the acts. Later as Issa prepares to go out with Molly in an attempt to cheer her up, Lawrence makes a joke that Molly’s standards are far too high to get a boyfriend. And Issa says, “yeah, maybe she should lower them like I did.” 

It takes him a minute but he catches the snark and Issa runs off before they can talk more about it but not before she passive aggressively suggests that they should break up. Molly figures out that it’s a scam once she sees that Issa and Daniel link up at the bar but she doesn’t have too much of a fit about it because she meets Jered (Langston Kerman) and they hit it off really well.

As Issa and Daniel reminisce on their high school days, she learns there’s an open mic night and Daniel encourages her to participate. 

Now, if you’ve watched the show you can’t forget something as wild as “Broken Pussy” but if you need your memory refreshed here you go. This song was inspired entirely by the conversation Issa and Molly had in the restaurant where Issa told her that her pussy was “broken.”

Molly is rightfully upset despite Issa’s aloofness to her anger, happy that she took a risk and received a good reception for it. And it doesn’t matter that nobody in the crowd knew who she was rapping about, Molly knew! And really, it's about the principle. Molly emotionally goes off on Issa about making a very serious issue she’s dealing with the butt of a joke and Issa is super dismissive. Issa, girl, what the hell? 

During Molly’s rant about how obviously utterly messed up all this is, Daniel is texting Issa telling her to swing by. And even worse, Issa replies during Molly’s breakdown. Knowing that she was merely a pawn in Issa’s attempt to hang out with Daniel, Molly tells her that if she cheats on Lawrence with Daniel then she’s just as dumb a bitch as she [Molly] is. Issa feels bad that she upsets her friend but not upset enough to go and visit Daniel.

What is this thing that people do where they put potential romantic partners before friends? Selfishness? It’s not that Issa doesn’t care about Molly but she was determined to rekindle something with Daniel that she literally left her best friend upset to go hang with a guy. I can’t speak for anyone but myself but I know for a fact that I wouldn’t be able to have a good night’s sleep without having resolved that. When Daniel does not give Issa what she wants, who is she going to turn to complain about it? 

But alas, Issa and Daniel’s meet-up is not met with the expectations Issa set. For the first time in this episode, she speaks up after Daniel kisses her and tells him how she’s going through a break-up and does not want her next relationship to go sour the way it did with Lawrence. The gag? Daniel tells her that he’s not looking for anything serious and feeling humbled and possibly a little betrayed at her own self for projecting something that wasn’t there, Issa goes back to Molly to set things right.

Final Thoughts: Listen to your friends. Care for your friends. And let yourselves be cared for by your friends. And dump that dude if you feel like it’s headed nowhere.

*Give them advice IF you can. If you can’t, just listen and hug them and don’t make it about you. You don’t need to be Iyanla Vanzant when it comes to a friendship. Effie, we all got pains!

See y’all next Sunday!

[davalynbaker]

While I discuss Insecure and it’s characters, I cannot forget about the bomb ass soundtrack, which you can find on Spotify. Each time I talk about an episode I’ll highlight some of the songs featured. 

Solange Knowles serves as music supervisor. And her TASTE. Artist and titles can be found after the cut.

Kendrick Lamar - Alright (To Pimp A Butterfly) Kari Faux - No Small Talk (Laugh Now, Die Later) Raphael Saadiq - Still Ray (Instant Vintage) TT the Artist - Lavish (Art Royalty) Drake - Feel No Ways (Views) Junglepussy - Bling Bling (Satisfaction Guaranteed)

[davalynbaker]

an insecure friendship.

We all watched that episode of Insecure, right? You know, episode five, where Issa and Molly’s friendship comes to a very ugly halt? If you haven’t, you should and if you don’t watch the show, you should also do that too.

I don't think I need to delve too deeply into the history of the series since we’re four seasons deep, but as you all know it's the web series turned HBO series starring Issa Rae as Issa Dee as, well, a woman struggling with her insecurities through adulthood.

Season four’s main storyline is the uncoupling of Issa and Molly's (Yvonne Orji) friendship. I watched the episode twice to write about it and made myself mad all over again in the process.

I've been trying to wrap my mind around Molly's behavior this season since the premiere episode. She's been sort of dancing along to this weird song where she passive aggressively reminds Issa of her shortcomings at every turn. 

In season four - episode one, when Issa stated that she was going to attempt a positive relationship with her now ex-boyfriend Lawrence's (Jay Ellis)  new girlfriend Condola (Christina Elmore), Molly simply stated "You just love drama," as a response. While I didn’t necessarily think Issa’s “GOOD VIBES ONLY” approach to every single thing in her life was going to actually work, Molly’s response was pretty negative and offered no solutions.

Seeing this made me wonder - 

"Has Molly always hated Issa?"

After the premiere of season four, I played around with the idea of a re-watch because I'm wondering how the hell Molly and Issa's relationship towards one another became so venomous? Season four even opens with Issa stating, "To be honest, I don't really fuck with Molly like that anymore." 

Has it always been there and I didn’t see it? Or did it really become this thing that just fell apart in the fifth season?

So I decided to set myself to task and discuss Insecure Seasons 1-4 and figure out how the hell it went wrong. And if you’re just as confused as me, you should follow along with me on this website and my Twitter to get updates. That’s right, I’m going to pick apart every single episode of Insecure. Are you ready? Because I sure the hell am.