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This is a film about someone’s struggle with depression 

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Issues

I have finished editing my short film since yesterday and I have not stopped trying find a way to export it to Vimeo. A small number of the files are corrupted in some way as they will not work unless the card reader with the CF card is plugged in to my Mac. It shows a camera at the side of the clips and usually all you need to do is click reimport camera and it will automatically import the missing file. I have tried deleting the video files and reinstalling them and still it will not work. My final resort which I’ve just discovered is to use a HD screen recorder and pray to god it works.

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Final Cut Pro

I had to edit on Final cut pro because I could not find A free version Adobe Premiere Pro 

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Visual Research 

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Visual Research

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Visual Research

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Ideas for shots

-Shot of John looking out a window with his hand touching the window and I could use something white to give a better reflection in the window

-Have John destroying the room in an upset state. Pulling down posters off the walls.

-Staring in the mirror at himself as he break down and tears run down his face.

-Sleeping scene with a lot of movement in the bed and later speed up the shot

-Clock sound effect

-Shower scene

-Heavy breathing as if having a panic attach

Have the room pitch black and shine a light on the face and flicker the light

-Leaving the camera in the exact same position have john move around in different positions and fade it in and out

-A shot of John washing his hands and face

-Arial shots of John lying on the ground

-Have subtitles saying how your feeling. Like for example if John is on the phone having a conversation with a friend and explaining how he great and everything is alright and the subtitles would be saying. I’m in pain and I need help. Can you help me. Ok talk soon. Please don’t go.

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Research for I woke up.....

Music over the top gives it a sense of emotion.

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I Woke Up.............

The film narrative written by Alan Raggett

I came up with the title from a line in a song I have which references depression:

I woke up and I realised I was dead.

I’ve been crawling out of holes that I never meant to dig. 

1. It’s having to stay in bed because you don’t have the will to move, but unraveling at the thought of what will happen if you miss work or school.

2. It’s feeling more tired the less you move, but your heart racing at the thought of taking the first step.

3. It’s getting more tightly wound the more mess piles up, but only staring at it and thinking, I’ll clean tomorrow.

4. It’s making six million to-do lists just to untangle your thoughts, but knowing you’ll never actually cross anything off.

5. It’s believing that every canceled plan will end your friendships, but not having it in you to follow through.

6. It’s feeling hopelessly low that you’re still goddamn single, but canceling every first date because the thought of going through with it gives you heart palpitations.

7. It’s fearing every day that your partner will get fed up and leave, but your anxiety whispering in your ear that they deserve better and should.

8. It’s ignoring texts and turning down invitations, and it’s aching when the texts and invitations stop.

9. It’s the constant fear of winding up alone, but accidentally isolating yourself because you sometimes you just need to hide from it all.

10. It’s wanting nothing more than to crawl home and sleep at 2 p.m., but your skittering, panicked pulse keeping you awake at 2 a.m.

11. It’s alternating between feeling paralysed in the present and scared shitless about the future.

12. It’s not enjoying the good days because you’re too gripped by the anxiety that the next low is around the corner.

13. It’s sleeping too much or not at all.

14. It’s needing a break from your racing thoughts, but not being able to climb out of the pit of yourself.

15. It’s needing to do everything, but wanting to do nothing at all.

16. It’s coping mechanisms and escapism, because when you’re not trying to hide from one part of your brain, you’re hiding from the other.

17. It’s wondering if the things that are making your heart feel heavy are things your anxious mind just made up.

18. It’s sitting awake at 3 a.m. worrying about a future you’re not even sure you want to have.

19. It’s feeling too much and nothing at all at the same time, which means feeling like you can never win.

20.But you can. And you will. You’re not alone

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Back-up Idea

A friend of mine Alan Raggett posted a candid stream of thought about his experience with depression which I thought was powerful and quite moving that someone would be so honest about something so personal on Facebook. I think it could be great as an narrative over a piece of film. The film will be shots of John all shot in a bedroom or certainly all indoors to reflect the feeling of isolation. I will shoot it in monochrome all done in post editing so I have more control.

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Actor Cancelled 16/12/15

Majella pulled out of the shoot because she is too busy so I been asking around but it’s not looking good as it’s very short notice.

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Bought a Zoom H5 in Waltons Music Shop €285

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Camera took a fall 15/12/15

Picked up camera from repair shop and had to pay €400 to fix it :-( Ready for shooting on the 17th Dec

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Script Copied from pdf

A Life Sentence      By David Dooley FADE IN SCENE 1 INT. HALLWAY LOOKING AT FRONT DOOR Camera focuses close-up on inside of front door, sound of key in the door. Door swings open and camera retreats to a wide-shot. Husband walks in the door, dressed in nondescript office attire, looking slightly disheveled. Top button of shirt undone and tie slightly loose and crooked. He throws his keys on the hall table with an exasperated sigh.                    WIFE               (voice comes from kitchen)          Honey, is that you?                    HUSBAND          Yeah, yeah, I’ll be there in a sec! Camera follows husband’s feet as he walks up the stairs and into the bedroom (using different camera angles), and closes the bedroom door behind him. INT. BEDROOM Husband takes wallet and phone from his trousers and throws them on the bed. Takes off his jacket, tie and trousers and throws them on the floor. Picks up a laptop from the nightstand and walks into the ensuite bathroom wearing nothing but his shirt, boxer shorts and socks. INT. BATHROOM He puts the laptop down on the toilet and clicks open a window. A loud woman’s moaning blares from the laptop speakers. In a panic he searches for the volume button on the laptop and lowers the volume. From behind, the camera watches the man masturbating. His eyes shut and he throws his head back as he nears climax. INT. BEDROOM The wife walks into the bedroom and leans down and starts to pick up the clothes from the floor. (CONTINUED) CONTINUED: 2.                    WIFE               (Inner Voice)          Christ! It’s like living with a          fucking two-year old! She walks over to the bathroom door and raises her hand to knock. INT. BATHROOM A loud knock startles the husband just before he reaches climax. He reaches down in a panic and shuts the laptop closed.                    HUSBAND          Yeah,yeah? Just on the toilet.                    WIFE          Do you want tea?                    HUSBAND          Yeah, great, cheers. I’ll be down in a sec. The husband fixes himself, turns around and leans his hands on the edge of the sink as he stares at his face in the mirror. He lifts up his hands and rubs his eyes with the palm of his hands before looking back at his reflection with a sigh. SCENE 2 INT. KITCHEN Camera focuses on close-up of the kettle coming to boil. The wife is preparing tea and cakes. The husband walks into the kitchen and sits down at the table.                    WIFE          Do you want some cake?                    HUSBAND          Yeah, sweet. She lays out the tea and cake on the table and sits down beside him. He opens the Sun newspaper and flicks straight to page 3. (CONTINUED) CONTINUED: 3.                    WIFE          Oh here, you’ll never guess what          happened today.               (She looks over for a               response, get none but carries               on with her story regardless)          You know your one Claire that I          used to work with... Her voice becomes muffled as the camera switches to the husband’s POV and focuses on the page 3 girl.                    WIFE               (in a sudden loud voice)          Are you listening to me?                    HUSBAND               (slightly confused)          What?               (enraged) YOU DIDN’T HEAR A FUCKING WORD I SAID, DID YOU? FUCKING TYPICAL! The scene switches to an imagined scenario inside the wife’s head. She grabs the back of her husband’s head with her right hand and proceeds to shove the cake into the mouth and all over his face. The scene quickly switches back to reality, where the husband looks up his paper in indignation.                    HUSBAND          I was listening!                    WIFE          oh, fuck off! She gets up and walks over to the sink, slamming a plate down to make her point. He raises his eyes to heaven, folds up his paper and walks out towards the sitting room. The wife starts washing the dishes and soon gets lost in a daydream. In her mind she walks out of the kitchen with a plate in her hand and into the sitting room where her husband is watching football on TV. She walks up behind him and raises the plate over her head and brings it down with a violent swing towards her husband’s head. Just as the plate is about to impact with his head, it cuts back to the kitchen sink from the wife’s perspective, where she is WIFE (CONTINUED) CONTINUED: 4. washing the same plate as before. After a few seconds she leaves the plate down in the sink and stares for a few seconds at the water, before turning and walking towards the sitting room. SCENE 3 INT. SITTING ROOM The husband is sitting down on a two-man couch watching football on the television. His wife sits down beside, nervously building herself up to making an announcement, but he remains completely oblivious and fixated on the match.                    WIFE          I think we need to talk...                    HUSBAND               (slightly raised voice)          Ah, I fucking knew it... that ref          is some bollocks! The wife sits and watches her husband, who is completely engrossed in what’s on the TV, and his reactions to the football match. Her tension is steadily rising. Before she realises what she is saying, she blurts it out without thinking.                    WIFE          I don’t love you anymore... The camera stays focused on the wife as she waits for her husband’s reaction.                    HUSBAND          That’s just fucking great... The camera cuts back to the husband.                    HUSBAND          ...how on earth is that a free          kick?! He’s fucking dived ref, are          you blind?               (brief pause, turning to his               wife)          Sorry, did you say something there          love? His wife just looks at him with a look of disgust and gets up from the couch and walks out of the room. With a subtle shrug of the shoulders, he turns back to the television and continues to watch the football. INT. BEDROOM A shot of the double bed, the husband and wife are in bed with the covers over them, their backs to each other. The husband looks asleep with his eyes closed and his bedside lamp switched off. The wife is reading a book by the light of the lamp on her side of the bed.                    WIFE               (voices swirling in her head               and rising to a crescendo)          I just can’t take it anymore...He          doesn’t even love me...What if I          can’t find someone better...He          never looks at me...He never          touches me...We haven’t made love          in a month...He’s seeing somebody          else, I know it...I’m so frightened          of being alone...Did I leave the          iron on?...No, or did I? No... She closes the book and puts it on the bedside table and reaches over to switch off the light. Darkness.                    WIFE               (in her head)          ...Did he ever really love me? As the room is cast into darkness the voices stop. She settles down into the bed and suddenly a soft voice is heard from the other side of the bed... THE END          HUSBAND Goodnight. I love you.

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Meeting with cast 03/12/15

Ideas from the meeting:

Male walks in from work. Subtle exchange of dialogue.Tea and cake scene: shove cake in face alternative scenario. Tea spilling. In the sitting room changing channel with female character trying to communicate to the male and drops “I don’t love you anymore” He roars at the TV “ah for fuck sake” while the shot is still on the female character. She leaves the room and bangs the door. He takes a bewildering glance in the direction of the departed female character, with a look that says “I should follow but I’m won’t”.

We start to shoot on the 17th

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Flattering lighting: Rembrandt lighting is when you place the light at roughly 45% to the left or the right.

Lighting from above to give a disconnect with the character because of the shadows caused by this light hides his eyes. 

-Use defusers to soften the light.

-The lighting can direct the viewers to where you want them to look.