I think the weirdest part about unus annus is that a channel that will end, a channel designated to die, helped me cope so much with a death that I wasn’t prepared for even though I saw it coming.
July 29th around 11:30AM, my Grammy passed away. I had been watching the channel before her passing, and before we were told she only had a few days left, as the curtains slowly closed on her story I was comforted by these videos even though I knew they would end too. It’s funny to think though, her decline started soon after unus annus began, giving me a way to cope with the fear, acceptance, and grief.
Death often makes me existential, I start to think about how one day I’ll be gone, but this time instead I began to think about what I’ll do to make the best of whatever time I have left. Unus annus inspired me to make plans to live instead of try to understand what it is to die.
Death is certain, but your dreams and aspirations depend on you and you alone. I’ll work on my YouTube channel again, I’ll try my hand at music like I always wanted to. Even after you’re gone I promise to live for today.
Thank you Unus Annus, thank you for everything.
(Pictures: me and Grammy during a brief and covid safe visit on my college graduation day and her and I at a restaurant when I was about 5)
That moment when your job lets you go and it’s taking awhile to find a new job and even Uber eats is taking awhile to let you drive for them and now you’re low-key debating selling feet pics because you’re getting anxious about bills and dipping into your savings