dreadeddiaries

[dreadeddiaries]

When do you realise that your mother's affection towards you was transactional.

When you did something for her and only then got something in return?

Or was it when you got your first job because she didn't choose to support your spendings in your first year of college.

Or was it when you realised that she only treated you this way because when your brother who did everything wrong was never burdened with the same guilt.

When did you realise that your mother only cared for you because you were her personal unpaid therapist, always there to listen to her and tell her what she should do.

For me it was everyday.

And no one ever tells you the heart break you go through when you realise your mother never cared for you, not in the motherly sense but as a caretaker who expected something from you.

[dreadeddiaries]

Bang chan: *sees you watching an edit of stray kids* y/n?

Y/n: yea?

Bang chan: you know what else is big?

Y/n: your feet we get it

Bang chan: *smirking* I wasn't talking about my feet *comes closer and traps you between the chair you were sitting on*

Y/n: wha..

Bangchan: I was talking about my nose *smiles and runs off*

[dreadeddiaries]

3:00 AM

“Suna, what the actual fuck?” You croaked, struggling to open your eyes.

Calling you at an ungodly hour, you didn’t have to look at your phone to know who it was.

A few seconds passed, but there was no response from the other line.

You groaned, “If this is a prank-”

“I like you.” Suna whispered ever so softly you weren’t sure if you heard him right.

You blinked. Once, twice, as your heart and mind processed his words. All the grogginess in your body; gone in an instant.

“What?”

“What?” He echoed, confused.

“What did you say?”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“But-but you said… you said something!”

“I didn’t?” Suna bemused, and you can hear the frown in his voice.

“You did! You just said you like me!”

“I swear I didn’t.”

You got up from your bed and stared at the screen; your heart beating eratically in your ears as Suna’s name and picture flashed before your eyes.

You knew what you heard. You weren’t gonna let Suna fool you.

You took a deep breath and explained patiently, “You called me, Suna. And the first thing you said was ‘I like you’-”

“I like you too.”

“Huh?”

“Please take care of me.”

“What?!”

“I’m so sorry, that was so lame.” You heard a muffled groan, like he just covered his face with a pillow. “If you’re gonna reject me because of that, please do it now. I might cry if you reject me in person. I’m serious.”

Suna paused to pluck up his courage, you could even hear him gulp. “But I really do like you, Y/n. I like-I love being with you… I hope you know and feel that when you’re with me.” He cleared his throat, “And… it’s okay if you don’t answer or if you don’t like me back. Just… please let me be with you, but if you don’t want to-”

“I didn’t know you could say that much words, Suna.”

The middle blocker sighed, exasperated. “… That’s just mean Y/n. I’m so close to crying here.”

“Hey, you called me at 3 am, confessed to me and pretended you didn’t. You were mean first you know…” You trailed off, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks, “But I like you too.”

“Huh?”

“Huh?”

“What did you-”

You suppressed a giggle, “I didn’t say anything.”

With that, Suna went panic mode. “Just so you know my heart is beating like I’m at the edge of a cliff right now, and I’m recording this call because I know you’d pull the same stunt with me, Y/n.”

He was frantic. You could imagine his fox-like eyes getting bigger as he spoke. Suna always acts cool and laid back, it was satisfying to see him break character for once. And knowing it was because of you, his feelings for you… your heart might just explode.

A giddy laugh escaped your mouth, “I can’t believe I like your annoying ass too.”

confession timestamps masterlist. reblogs are love~

[dreadeddiaries]

Types of kisses - Inarizaki

Includes: Kita, Atsumu, Osamu, Aran, Suna

Warnings: none, fluff

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

Shinsuke Kita - Forehead kiss

Kita is all about routines. In the morning, the breakfast he makes you is perfect down to the last grain of rice. His clothes are perfectly ironed and when he's all dressed and ready to rush out the door, he leans in to press a kiss to your forehead and whisper an I love you. He does it every single day he can.

You're washing the dishes from breakfast when you feel a hand squeeze your hip. You know it's your husbands signal for you to turn around so he can complete his morning routine.

"I'll see you later, my love" he mumbles as he presses his lips to your forehead

Aran Ojiro - Kiss on the lips

He likes to steal kisses from you, the spontaneous kind of kisses that you nor anyone else around you is expecting. He loves you and he's not shy about it. Though he appears quieter in public, you know just how disgustingly cheesy and romantic he can be. He just can't help himself when it comes to you.

"Your ice cream looks better than mine. Can I taste it?" He asks, with an innocent smile on his face. You lean your ice cream cone towards him but that's not really what he's looking for as he grabs your chin and tilts your face towards his. You giggle into the kiss as he deepens it. The kiss is so good you can't even be mad at how cliche and annoying that was.

Atsumu Miya - kiss on the lips

For Atsumu it's a possessive thing. He loves kissing you everywhere but your lips are his favourite. When he kisses your neck or your cheek, you can still turn your head and pay attention to whatever task it is you're doing but your lips? you have no choice but to pay attention when he kisses you there.

"baby please, just one kiss" he whines as he presses his face into your neck. "dinner can wait"

His hands cover yours to stop you from cutting anymore vegetables and you know he doesn't plan on moving until he gets his kiss. You turn in his arms and you notice the grin that settles on his face; its not a smug look are anything, it's a sincere smile because he truly loves kissing you and he tells you as much as he finally indulges himself in your mouth.

Osamu Miya - Hand kisses

He thinks all his years of volleyball combined with his busy profession of cooking has ruined his hands (you'd disagree) but your hands are different. To him your hands are beautiful, they're not as rough or calloused and they're definitely not as big as his hands.

He's driving the two of you to a cabin in the mountains for a quiet getaway together. one hand sits on the wheel and the other is intertwined with yours. He can really feel how different your hands are to his when he's holding you like this and he briefly glances over at you. His heart clenches a little when he sees how excited you look. As he turns back to the road he lifts your joined hands up to his lips and kisses the back of your hand.

"were almost there, baby"

Rintarou Suna - Neck kisses

Sometimes, Suna thinks you have him under some kind of magical spell. He's addicted to you, he didn't even know he could feel this way about someone. He's told you many times about his theory that you're a love spell casting witch who's seducing him with magic but you're quick to assure him that your just as lovesick as he is.

"you comfy yet?" He asks as you finish adjusting your position in his lap. Its movie night and you want to make the most of it before your boyfriend inevitably falls asleep. You chuckle in response but you don't verbally respond. As you lean your head back on his shoulders he takes the opportunity to press a kiss to your neck as its bared to him. you smell so good and you're just so kissable he can't help himself. "are you sure you haven't cast a spell on me?"

[dreadeddiaries]

His favourite places to kiss... (Tsukishima x Reader)

Pretty self explanatory and definitely self indulgent… 

Warnings: I dont think there are any… sweet pet names and one which is sorta spicy so please 18+ (I am not responsible beyond warning you guys what you should and shouldn’t read… You know if you’re in the wrong 👀)

btw time skip so older and more emotionally mature Tsukii

Flushed cheeks and lidded eyes in hidden corners of the campus when he feels too soft to not press kisses to your inner wrist, where your vein is visible/pulse point is.

As much as Tsukishima hates to admit it you are just as good at flustering him as he is at flustering you. You know exactly how to use your short stature to your advantage and leave him a soft endeared mess, when you rock back and forth on the balls of your feet. Teasing eyes and flushed cheeks making you a little too pretty for his liking as you keep glancing between his eyes and lips. Tsukishima who had you pressed up against the wall, leaning over your smaller stature, tried his very best not to melt but failed when he let his forehead thump against your shoulder. You chuckled into his ear as one hand came up to caress his hair before settling on cupping his cheek, even as he pulled away. In that moment he felt too soft not to nuzzle his face into your soft palm, holding your wrist there. He lightly trialed his lips over the pulsing point before pressing them more firmly into the vein that he could see. Once more and then a third time as he kissed the fragile skin over and over again.

When he turned back to face you, your eyes were wide as you watched this usually salty 6′3 man bend down and melt while kissing you like you were the most delicate thing there was. His cheeks red and eyes lidded as he smiled at you small yet lovely. Immediately you were pulling your hand away and, burying your head into his chest, arms trying to decide wether to pull him closer to hide in his chest or push him away and look somewhere else. The former winning. 

“Tsukiiii” You whined and he couldn’t help but snicker as he tucked you into his form, chin resting on your head as he let you hide this once (though usually he would pull your arms away wanting to see you squirm from something so simple.) Every soft curve of yours pressed into the harder planes of his body making him feel strong and stable. He liked knowing that he was your safe harbor.

“Y/NNNN” He mimicked which only caused you more annoyance. And even though he could hear your continued grumbling he could only laugh some more as he pulled away and whispered a small ‘cute’  before intertwining your fingers and making your way back to your friends.  

Sick days where you wouldn’t let him near you so he would sneak into your bed before pressing his lips repeatedly against your temples, feeling helpless yet wanting to protect you from something so simple.

Tsukii chanced a peak through the crack in the door. You were flat on your back with a cold press on your forehead and a frown on your face. He quickly stepped back when he saw you trying to peer back at him but he doubted you saw anything without your glasses. He was currently waiting for the opportune moment.

You had been sick for the past week and had vehemently refused to let Tsukii step close to you in fear he would get sick too. Tsukii hated it. He hated how considerate you were and he hated how much more attractive it made you even snotty and teary eyed. He was also sick of your cold. He knew he was grumpy and emotionally constipated but he missed you and he wanted to to be able to take care of you and you not letting him be there for you made him feel like a bad boyfriend. He felt helpless from being unable to protect you from something so simple and he missed your touch. So here he was waiting outside your dorm door, having bribed your roommate with a pre written essay and study plan to not tell you and let him stay in your dorm for a week. He waited for the moment where your eyes got hazy and became lidded with sleep. It was Tsukii’s favourite version of you cause you got all whiny and cute. Its only then that you would let him baby you (in his own Tsukii-ish mean way which involved flicking your forehead and laughing at you). He watched the minute your face relaxed before he strode into the room. He regarded you in endeared amusement as you immediately frowned. He stopped near the bed hearing your slurred protests and whining them back to you, 

“Tsukiii ya shouldn’t be here ya know?? I’m sick and y’ll also get sick” 

“Y/Nnnnn and sick really? I wouldn’t know. You look like you’re in tip top shape really… should I spike a volleyball to you…” 

He watched your eyes become teary and cheeks redder before you start sniffling. Crossing your arms and pushing yourself further into the bed.

“Don’t be mean you bean pole of a human *sniff, sniff*… when yer sick I’m so nice to ya and this is what I get… Next time ‘m not gonna pet your hair” 

“Well if you let me get close to you I would be nic–… Ahh Okay okay don’t cry you big baby” 

He slid under the covers next to you making himself comfy. He lay on his side, letting one arm slide under your head and around your shoulders. The other went over your stomach to rest against your waist and hip. His lean arms were heavy and warm like a weighted blanket and he sighed in relief when you pressed yourself further against his body. It was in small moments like these where you let yourself be vulnerable that Tsukii couldn’t help but firmly and protectively press a kiss against your temples. He would do it again and again, even as you fell asleep and even as you woke up. He would occasionally press his own forehead against your temple. And in between these firm and worried kisses and moments of skinship he would whisper words he would otherwise deny ever having said,

“I love you… you in all your rash, reckless, delicate and easily hurt glory… You’re a moron, even more than the human tangerine… but you’re my moron okay? And I don’t like my moron like this so get better… you big dumb-dumb” 

And thats where he would spend the rest of his night. Holding you, keeping your warm, tangling his long legs between yours and by your request even wear a mask, though that doesn’t stop the worried kisses… yeah the opportune moment. 

Dimly lit bedrooms after exhausting days where the only thing on either of your minds was just being there with the other. The skin-ship had Tsukii preening and he couldn’t help but hold your hand to his mouth, pressing firm kisses against each finger tip which would dissolve into something more. 

It had been a demanding day though that was putting it lightly. Tsukishima was fairly certain he no longer had thighs since he could no longer feel them, Training having put them through the ringer. His back hurt from the uncomfortable chairs at the library that he personally offered to replace. Hi hand he was certain might fall off after finishing his ten page essay and finally he wished he didn’t have a head if it meant the throbbing headache of his would go away… He didn’t think there was a saving grace until he got home and there you were. You in all your comfy glory, framed by soft edges and the dim lighting of the bedroom as you read a book and had a glass of wine by your side. Your skin was dewy form you nighttime creams and your hair way in a pony tail with all the shorter pieces falling out. You were picture perfect and Tsukii had never been happier about having showered before coming home. He schlucked his clothes of as fast as he could and never even giving you a chance to ask or say hello he dropped himself onto your figure. You let out a loud ‘oof’ but spread your thighs a little more nonetheless to accommodate his hips that settled against yours. 

“Tough day huh Tsukii?”

All you received were grumbled groans from where he buried his head into your chest. Your own hand coming to stroke his hair and when he propped his chin up, his cheek bones. You smiled when you finally got a peak of his face, your own lighting up, 

“There’s my pretty boy” 

Tsukii felt himself smile at the endearment. Tsukii had grown up and though he still blushed he no longer acted like a prepubescent boy who shoved aside any comfort. He keened in the attention before he pulled your hand to his mouth with a firm grip. And here is where he grabbed each finger and one by one pressed his lips to the soft pads of your fingertips, starting with your pinkie and ending at your thumb which he lightly bit. You watched with heated eyes as this tall blonde boy made you feel both like a goddess and yet like a little girl all in one setting. You watched his lips trial a path onto your palm before letting you stroke his face again. His own hands going to the sides of your thighs, stroking the soft flesh and thats how you both spent the next few hours… happy and soft.

When everything felt like it was going wrong and nothing seemed okay, when you had crawled both physically and mentally into the darkest place you could find is when Tsukii would place his lips firmly against your forehead, rocking you back and forth and whispering reassurances. 

Tsukishima rushed as fast as he could to the psychology building. His heart was pounding and his mind was running at the speed of light. When he got the call from Tadashi he had felt his heart drop into his stomach and despite trying his best he couldn’t help but think of the worst case scenario. He practically ripped the door of its hinges as he made a mad dash for the sixth floor, pushing past other bewildered students and taking two stairs at a time. 

He knew today was going to be difficult. He knew he should have trusted his gut when it told him to wait outside your building to pick you up after your exam today. He knew he should have trusted his judgment. He couldn’t blame Tadashi, even though the man had been insistent that he would help manage if you got your anxiety attack/ sensory overload today and get you home because at the end of the day Tadashi didn’t know the extent of your anxiety. Hell there were times where Tsukii thought even you didn’t know just how bad it got. As your loved one having to watch from the sidelines as you went from psychiatrist to psychologist to cardiologist it drove him mad how you could smile and brush aside something that was so debilitating. He had been there for all of it and he knew he shouldn’t have deviated from the comfortable routine he had helped build for you and himself… he knew and he still fucked up. 

He was at least grateful for the fact that your professor had managed to get half the floor cleared out so as to decrease your sensory overload. He finally reached the classroom and entered with a bang of the door. His eyes landed on a very distressed Tadashi who stood in front of the janitor’s closet that you had locked yourself in. The man had red cheeks and was sweating profusely as he begged you to make some noise or best case scenario open the door, 

“Y/N pleas please please open the door, I just umm I need to make sure you haven’t passed out… Look you can open and close it really quickly or like maybe bang on the thing please… Tsukii should be here any mo–Kei oh thank god” 

With a quick thanks and instructions on what to bring/do Tsukishima sent Yamaguchi to wait outside. Tsukishima gave both you and him two minutes of complete and utter silence before he knocked on the door. It was a gentle rap of his knuckles very unlike the pounding panic that Tsukii felt, 

“Y/N please… please its me…Your Tsukii right? and I need you to open the door… please… darling I’m so sorry but please open the door” 

Tsukii heard shuffling on the other side and then a click and that was all that he needed. He opened the door that was otherwise pitch black. He left a sliver of it open behind him and through that sliver of light he found you crawling back to the very back of the room. You sat in the centre, hugging your knees and framed by various cleaning supplies as your body shook with sobs and a heart that was no doubt hurting from how quickly it was beating. Tsukii wasted no time in dropping to his knees in front of you, long arms collecting you into his lap. Its now when he presses his lips firmly into your forehead as he enveloped your body whole, like if he hugged you hard enough he could take away the anxiety and fear and paralysing panic. He again and again pressed kisses to your forehead whispering words that he hoped and prayed helped. He was never a words kind of guy but for you he could be… in his own way, 

“You’re okay? You hear me? You are fine, you are completely safe and okay… just breathe. Work on getting your heart rate down okay? You can do it! I know you can not just cause you’ve done it before but because you are my partner… And when we started dating I didn’t just date you cause you’re pretty… I’m dating you cause you tend to pull of the impossible and I know right now calming down seems impossible but you. are. going. to. do it. okay?” 

and that is where you both stayed well into the dark. Tsukii rocking you back and forth, the haze of worry finally disappearing leaving in its wake stability at knowing he got you…

I was going to post this later but here you go!! <3

A little Tsukii love so yayyyy anywhoo as always I hope you enjoy and please request stuff using the ask anything feature  

Masterlist

[dreadeddiaries]

suna rintarou headcanons

why, you ask…cuz i miss him. and i’m not doing so well after dat one shot. honestly idek wat dis is, jus stuff which i wholeheartedly believe ig ? :>

love language : physical touch. his hands are always hanging around your waist or thighs. subtle touches and small kisses from him are everybody’s essentials.

favorite places to kiss : literally everywhere but mostly on the neck, nose, lips, thighs, shoulder and did i say neck ?

nicknames he’d call you : angel, princess, baby, babe and he’s definitely the type to call you cringe names just to piss you off.

his type : he’d go for anyone. that’s it. all he needs is someone who’ll match his vibe, someone who’ll understand him. the quirky, cocky, sarcastic, daredevil personality is his top tier. although he finds the quiet ones cute. at the end of the day, anyone. (cuz dayum bro, u y/n’s r jus GAHHHH!!)

you’re gonna tell me the guy’s a smoker ? yeah no. he’s the cool guy who declines it whenever he’s offered.

the type of person to think that making cereal is a talent. and honestly, i agree with him.

his camera roll is full of pictures and videos. of you. the storage definitely exceeded its limit, and he has to upgrade it but he just believes that no storage can contain all the stuff because he’ll just keep on taking them. with no regrets.

his playlist : the type of playlist that gets you hooked from song one. he’d have banger songs. mostly underrated ones. slowed version ? yes, slowed version. it’s his thing. and your playlist is on repeat and oh, y’all’s spotify blend ? constantly played it’s illegal.

he’s a tsundere. not that he isn’t all olaf around the team and your friends. as soon as it’s just the two of you, he’s putty in your hands. absolutely, devastatingly adorable. so very soft, and he sleep mumbles, not sleep talk. every time you thread your fingers through his hair, your voice nothing more than a whisper, his thoughts pour out like rain. it ranges from ‘i’m so lucky to have you baby’ ; ‘fuck, you’re beautiful you know that ?’ ; ‘you have really soft hands’ ; ‘i could stare at you all day- no, forever and never get bored’ to ‘for some odd ass reason, i ship our history teacher and chemistry teacher. do you ?’ ; ‘baby, dick has so many synonyms, i’m jealous’ ; ‘atsumu and osamu fighting is like two gorillas competing for a rotten ass banana’. he’s a talker only around you, and you could listen to him all day, everyday.

if you’re the type to throw on mismatched socks, don’t worry, he does too, we don’t judge here. ‘socks is socks right ?’ he quotes.

sneaky kisses are his favorite. skipping practice to go make out with you ? sign him up.

kisses with him aren’t rushed. it’s the one where each kiss has a very deep value to it. like he wants you to know what he’s thinking.

is such a fucking tease, it’s frustrating. but is also the one who’s very needy for your attention. see how the tables turn ?

bullying atsumu about him being single is something you’ve both found amusement in.

midnight drives ? midnight drives. he’ll text you around the wee hours of the morning and ask you to join him for a drive, which you obviously don’t decline. playlist blasting in the back, your head hanging out the rolled down window, screaming the lyrics to your favorite song. cheap store candy wrappers are everywhere, a bottle of water, for which the cap’s already missing and you’re both arguing on who has lost it, the small engine sounds in the background. one more memory added to the album in his storage.

walking home from school, he likes to take the long route so he could be with you just a bit longer. hands intertwined, kicking small rocks and pebbles which is in his path, ears on alert, always listening to you, the quietness of the evening is all something he wouldn’t trade for the world.

conclusion : an amazing boyfriend, amazing human being, who i’m very pissed isn’t existing in this world.

[dreadeddiaries]

— spending time with their daughter

characters: kuroo, suna, atsumu

genre: fluff

wc: 650+

<I’ve been super busy so I haven’t posted on this blog in so long ahhhh but I found this in my drafts so I thought I would share it! I’m also hoping to start writing again, but probably very sporadically.>

It’s an ordinary saturday, and KUROO’s standing in the middle of the living room wearing a sleek black suit and holding a humorously small bouquet of flowers.

You stifle a laugh when you walk in to see him standing on the other side of the room, and he playfully scoffs at your pajamas in response.

You looked quite out of place, especially since the only other person in the room was a small girl sporting a puffy baby-pink dress and shiny black flats clutching to the fabric of your pants.

“Daddy!!” the small girl exclaims as she lets go of you and stumbles across the room.

Kuroo lowers himself down on one knee before holding out the small bouquet, stopping his daughter in her tracks.

“For my princess,” he says graciously, chuckling when the small child takes the flowers delicately into her arms, eyes twinkling with wonder.

She swivels around to face you and almost trips over her dress, but she steadies herself before holding the flowers out in front of her, “mommy, look what daddy got me!”

“Very pretty,” you smile, leaning against the wall, and she nods excitedly.

“Princess, are you ready to go on our date?” Kuroo asks, and the small girl runs back to him, crashing into his open arms.

You walk up to them, placing a kiss on your daughter’s cheek before looking up at your husband.

“I don’t think you try this hard for our dates,” you joke.

He quirks an eyebrow at you and gestures to the small girl in his arms, “well, this one’s a lot harder to impress.”

Keep reading

[dreadeddiaries]

𝐀𝐒 𝐈𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐒

— multi. character x gn!reader | hurt/comfort

[ kuroo, suna, sakusa ]

warnings: neglect (in kuroo’s), mentions of alcohol consumption & self-isolation (in suna’s), insecurities (in sakusa’s), break ups/make ups, exes to lovers

note from heart: ‘as it was’ by harry styles has been on repeat for me for the past couple days & i wanted to make smthn based off of it <3 ((also i got a bit carried away in suna’s part LMFAO))

KUROO —

‘in this world, it’s just us. you know it’s not the same as it was’

❀ you & kuroo had broken up because he had just gotten too focused with his job

❀ he began to neglect your relationship, prioritizing his work, coming home late, leaving before you woke up, just overall not seeming to care for you like he used to

❀ after arguing for what seemed like eternity, you had called it quits

❀ “i know your job is important to you, tetsurou, but isn’t our relationship important too?” you had asked

❀ but you were left with no response, not even spared a glance

❀ “alright then.. if we’re not important, then i’ll save you the trouble and leave. i’ll pick up my stuff tomorrow morning. when you’re at work.”

after a month of being broken up, kuroo had reached out to you, asking for forgiveness and promising to mend your relationship. you were hesitant at first, worried that you might end up in a cycle of being neglected once more.

“our relationship is important to me, and i should’ve said something that night. i should’ve done something to make you stay, and i’m sorry. i’m so, so sorry, y/n. i love you more than anything,” he spoke, taking smaller steps towards you inside your new apartment.

he hated seeing you here inside the place you now called home. he hated coming back to what was once your shared apartment to not find you in the kitchen preparing dinner for him. he hated not waking up to you in his arms. he hated not being with you, and he hated himself for allowing you to walk out.

he loved his job and he wanted to do everything in his power to excel in it, but he let his ambitions get the best of him, making you feel lonely and hurt. but now, he wanted nothing more than for you to come home; for the both of you to be together again.

you stood there, quiet and unsure. kuroo could practically hear your mind racing with thoughts and questions. he could sense your hesitance, and it made him anxious.

“tetsurou,” you began, your tone cautious and quiet. “i won’t come home right away,” you continue, looking away from him. your words made his heart drop to his stomach, but part of him felt relieved that you wanted to be with him just as much as he did. “if we’re going to make this work, you have to start by putting in more effort,” you spoke, bringing your gaze back to him to be met with a look of determination.

he nodded his head, carefully lifting your hands in his. you followed in suit, interlacing your fingers together. he pulled you closer to him, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. “i love you, y/n. and i promise to do better. i promise to be so much better for you and for us so that you can come home,” he says, never letting you go in the process.

your rest your head against his chest, listening to his racing heart gradually reach a steady pace. “it won’t be the same for a while, you know,” you say quietly, and you feel him nod again. “i know, but i’ll be sure to bring us back to how we were before; to how it was. i promise.”

SUNA —

‘answer the phone. suna, you’re no good alone. why are you sitting at home on the floor?’

❀ suna had a habit of coming home late, constantly out with his team, and it usually ended up with him coming home reeking of alcohol

❀ it had gotten to a point where you just couldn’t take it anymore

❀ “rin, this is unhealthy. you’re an athlete, you have to take better care of yourself!” you lectured him one day, but it seemed that- in his drunken state- he didn’t care for your lecture

❀ “if it bothers you so much, then leave,” he slurred, rolling his eyes as he laid back on the couch

❀ and that was the final straw for you, making you grab your things. the last thing you saw before walking out was your boyfriend fast asleep on the couch

“dude, where have you been? you can’t keep missing practice like this… give me a call back when you get this, okay?” atsumu’s voicemail ended, making suna drop his head into his hands, his phone falling onto the carpeted floor. it had been about three weeks since you had left.

suna had woken up the next morning after you walked out, his head pounding and his body didn’t seem to forgive him for sleeping on the couch. he had walked to your shared room to go and wake you up, but he was met with an empty bed. he noticed your charger, bag, and majority of your things were missing. that’s when he knew he had lost you.

and when he realized you weren’t coming back, he didn’t bother to go to practice. he didn’t bother to contact anyone, not even you. instead he isolated himself, drowning in the loneliness of the silent apartment that you two had once shared.

he sat on the couch for most of his days, not daring to enter the bedroom because he knew he would just feel more alone and guilty. he scolded himself mentally every single day for not being more responsible, for not listening to you, and for taking your love and affection for granted. all you wanted for him was to be healthy and to take better care of himself because, you were right, he is an athlete- an olympic one at that.

his thoughts were interrupted when he heard the door unlock, his head shooting up from his hands to see your figure cautiously walking through the doorway. your eyes met, your expression shocked to see him where you had left him.

“y/n,” he said, almost in disbelief. “what.. what’re you doing here?” he asks. you look down. “um, i was just here to finally pick up the last of my things,” you say quietly. suna’s heart aches even more, his hopes of you coming home to him flying out the window.

he stands from the couch, his hand reaching to scratch the back of his neck. “so you’re actually leaving, huh?” he asks sheepishly, fighting the urge to break down in front of you. “i don’t want to,” you whisper, but just loud enough for him to hear.

his eyes light up slightly, the sadness in his gaze fading away at your words. “i didn’t want to leave in the first place,” you continue, your voice cracking as you held back your own tears. “honestly, i was hoping you wouldn’t be here cause.. cause i thought it might’ve been easier.” but he was there, and he hadn’t left since.

“atsumu’s been bugging me a lot, you know… always asking where you were and if you were okay,” you say, filling the silence. you finally look up at him, your eyes sad and worried because although you wished he wasn’t here, you had hoped he was taking better care of himself. but he wasn’t. missing practice, isolating himself from the world; it broke your heart.

your body begins to move faster than you can think, and you find yourself pulling suna in for a hug, crying softly into his chest, muttering things about him not taking care of himself and you were worrying for him.

suna quickly wraps his arms around you, burying his face in the crook of your neck as he begins to cry. “i can’t do this without you, y/n.. i’m sorry,” he sobs, his body shaking as he holds you just a bit tighter in his embrace. “i should’ve listened to you, i should’ve taken better care of myself.. i shouldn’t have let you walk out,” he cries. “i’m sorry for leaving you, rin,” you say, tears still flowing down your cheeks as you hold him.

“i can’t do this by myself, y/n.”

“and i won’t let you, rin.”

SAKUSA —

‘i don’t wanna talk about the way that it was’

❀ sakusa was blunt, but it never really bothered you. you always saw it as something that made him a genuine person; always telling you how it is rather than sugarcoating everything

❀ but as much as you appreciated his honesty, there were moments where his truths hit a little too close to home

❀ “kiyoomi, you can’t just say things like that,” you mumbled, holding back your tears after listening to your boyfriend’s rather harsh words

❀ “what? i’m just saying how it is,” he responds nonchalantly, not seeming to take your feelings into consideration

❀ and it hurt. it hurt more than before because he had brought up your insecurities as if it was something that came natural to him

❀ “i can take a lot of things, but what you just said is where i draw the line, kiyoomi,” you spat, beginning to feel both frustrated and hurt. “you shouldn’t say things like that especially when you know it’ll hurt someone, especially if that someone is someone you love.”

❀ and with that, you walked away. you walked away from the one sided argument, from him, and from your relationship

“i shouldn’t have said any of those things to you, y/n. i’m sorry for ever bringing that up.. i should’ve been more considerate,” sakusa said.

you two were sitting on a bench at the park. after a couple weeks of being apart, he finally plucked up the courage to reach out to you and ask to meet with him so you both could talk. you agreed, but since you both had sat down down on this bench, you were quiet.

he sighed, looking over at you expectantly, hoping that you’d finally speak up. he knew you had a lot going through your mind. with the way that your eyes never left the ground, he knew you had something to say but hesitated to do it. “i know,” he continued, taking a breath, “i know i can be blunt.. and i know that the things i say can be hurtful-“

“but you say it anyways,” you finally say, looking up and meeting his gaze. you had a sullen and disappointed look in your eyes, and it made the guilt in his chest well up even more. “i never meant to hurt you,” he mutters, and now it was his turn to look away, not wanting to see the damage that he caused.

“you did it anyways,” you say again, your words stabbing at his heart, reminding him of his crimes. “but,” you continue, “i know that everything you say is honest and genuine.. even if it does hurt sometimes, i know that you say it out of love.” he looks at you again, only to be met with a soft and forgiving smile.

sakusa’s heart swells with relief. you grab his hand in yours, taking a quick breath. “just promise me that you’ll be more careful with your choice of words, omi,” you say, voice quiet and wary. he nods, giving your hand a gentle squeeze. “i will. i promise,” he says, and you know he’ll keep his promise. you know that your relationship won’t be as it was, but that it’ll better.

[dreadeddiaries]

KILIG: 1 : a feeling of exhilaration or elation caused by an exciting or romantic experience.

or, in other words, HQ BOYS AND THEIR TROPES

yaku morisuke has never gotten familiar with the adrenaline of getting butterflies. he begins to panic, you’ve been friends with him since you were kids, so why does he get so nervous when you walk past him all of a sudden? he wonders, what if he tells you and it ruins what you’ve both been building? the risk is heavy, he knows that, but how is he suppose to look at you and refuse the urge to kiss you? it’s an accident when he confesses, i’m in love with you, by the way, one that takes you completely off guard (and him, too, if the color on his cheeks is any indication).

a relationship with iwaizumi hajime is a gradual process. it takes time to understand the many puzzle pieces that come together to make him whole. it’s a puzzle that takes you a very minimal amount of time to figure out, though, almost as if you’ve done it many times before, as if you know the pieces by heart. and when your hand is delicately placed in his, iwaizumi comes to realize that you were the unaccounted piece he was unconsciously searching for.

you first meet kuroo tetsurou at the corner store cafe. it’s an odd meeting, really, anyone would tell you that falling for the guy who spilled his exaggeratedly sweetened coffee all over your blouse minutes before your meeting was way too cliché to be believable. and although his sickeningly sweet smile was swoon worthy, you’d have to tell them that it was his compassion in those moments that sealed the deal. he had just gotten on his break so he offered you his (way too large) button up, a new coffee, as well as his number. just in case, he said.

it started off as teasing with suna rintarou; he takes your pencils, you call him names, his smirk is followed by you getting your materials back. he’s not sure if he can pinpoint the exact date he started catching feelings. maybe it was brushing of your hands, or the passionate eye-contact after a brief argument, but he doesn’t really care enough to go back in time and find out. and when you’re asked to team up for a project, he’s the first to put his arm over your chair and mark you as taken— which way, he doesn’t care, it’ll be both soon enough.

it’s a dumb idea, a really stupid one that only an idiot would agree to. so, when you shake hands with miya atsumu, agreeing to fake date him to make your ex jealous, you know you’ve gone utterly insane. it isn’t until the lines become blurred— the scripted kisses become second nature, the occasional shared glances come with genuine warmth, that atsumu realizes he’s in too deep. it’s a silly thing for him to ponder about, so when he asks you, ‘is this for real?’ you lose all restraint on pretending, nodding rapidly in response.

[dreadeddiaries]

yuni, feed me with enamies to lovers with suna 🏃

ENAMIES TO LOVERS WITH SUNA RINTAROU!

note from yuni: i see you have taste nonnie 👏 i did hcs bc i currently have writters block so i hope thats fine! i hope this is enough to feed you 😭<3

warnings: suna being a moron (insulting you lovingly though)

you two met at one of his games. he accidentally bumps into you and looks up and he's like "wow" to himself cuz you're so gorgeous (ofc, who wouldn't, like slay) and he says something rude

anyways you say something even worse back and he's just in shock, why is he getting hot, like what

you guys went your separate ways, but he couldn't stop thinking about you

one day you go and hang out with the twins, he didn't pay attention when they told him you were joining them, since he didn't even know your name

you meet up with them and he's just like oh

spending time with the twins = spending time with him

he's so annoying, he laughs his butt off when you get pissed off, but even though you get mad you can't deny his smile is kind of...cute

scares you at random times and runs away as you chase him through the gym 💀

SUCH A TEASE BRO, HE FINDS THE TINNIEST THINGS TO TEASE YOU ABOUT 😭

he took it a lil too far one time and apologized properly, but he never really takes it too far, he knows his limits

through all that teasing he notices how he isn't doing it because he hates you, but something else.

he glances at you and when you catch him he just says "why are you staring at me?😏" and then there's an argument over who was steering first, he's holding back laughs 💀

when you talk back to him his head is just like: "I hate you..but that was hot" JSJSJDJCJF

don't even get me started on how protective he is tho

secretly death glares everyone who tries to confess to you

he teases you but when someone else does the same thing he will throw hands because only he's allowed to do that

the twins caught on and then poke fun at you both when you guys get a little too close and then you're both red realizing what you were doing

in the end, it's obvious he likes you, and as time passes he gets softer with you

overall lots of teasing, chaos, and blushing with him shahshdhfh

©zikyuh 2020

[dreadeddiaries]

Todoroki Who doesn’t realizes he likes you until it’s too late

You’re already dating his bestie, Bakugo, who he respects so much, so he doesn’t say anything.

But you’re only dating Bakugo because Deku doesn’t bother to look your way because everyone is convinced he has a thing for Uraraka.

However, Deku’s good friend Todoroki has confided in him that he likes you and, no matter what feelings Deku may have for you, he couldn’t do that to Todoroki.

Thus the love square is born and chaos ensues as all three boys pine over you- never able to fully realize their true feelings, until…no…you couldn’t date all of them…could you…

[dreadeddiaries]

take care (katsuki bakugo imagines)

this is my first time posting my writing here and this just an idea i've been playing around it for a while. if you guys would like a part 2 please let me know :)

***********

“- don't know man i haven't heard from her in almost 2 weeks I'm kinda getting worried.” Eijiro Kirishima’s voice wafted over the shower stalls as Katsuki Bakugo turned off the shower.

“Sorry man you gotta repeat whatever you were talking about, stupid shower drowns out everything.” Bakugo said, wrapping a towel around his waist as he stepped out. Thanks to the new renovations at the Hero Agency, he no longer had to head home smelling of blood, sweat, smoke or whatever foul item he spent his shift working on. 

“I’m talking about y/n, Bakugo. I haven't heard from her for weeks now and I'm kinda getting worried. It’s not like her to ghost me for that long.” Kirishima said, stressing heavily on the “me” in the sentence. 

Bakugo was not surprised. Eijiro and Y/n became as thick as thieves in their second year after Y/N gave him a limited edition Crimson Riot poster that she found in a thrift shop. Given the fact that the poster was now easily worth at least 8 months of groceries, Kirishima dubbed her his new found best friend and they have been inseparable ever since. Now that Bakugo thought of it, he had not seen the (h/c) haired girl for quite a while as she usually drops into the agency to bring them lunch on days when Bakugo and Kirishima worked long shifts and were unable to get home or if she just wants to complain about her co-worker Monoma who her agency had the brilliant idea of pairing her with her. He also realised that she had not been looking at his instagram stories for a few days now. Not that he was obsessively checking whether she did of course, he was just naturally observant. 

“Maybe she’s just busy with work. She is one of the top heroes in her agency.” he offered, yanking his tee shirt over his head.

“Yea but even so, she usually shoots me a message at like 3am along the lines of “hey kiri i’m being forced to work above my paygrade again, i’ll be back to annoy you in 2-3 business days.” I haven't even gotten that.” Kirishima said as they began to make the 20 minutes trek back to their apartment. It had been Kirishima’s idea for the duo to get an apartment downtown as it was close enough to the agency in case there was an emergency and the rent was pretty good too so it allowed Bakugo to save easily so he can open his own agency in a few years. Apparently, climbing the charts at such a quick speed does not pay the way it used to.

“Why not ask that boyfriend of hers?” Bakugo said, trying not to sound too bitter as he spat out the word. Y/N and Alexei met during their third year at UA and have been together for three years and, honestly much to Bakugo’s joy and disdain all at once, she seemed very happy with him. In keeping with his true nature, Bakugo kept his distance from Alexei and was bare minimum polite towards him but he could not deny the fact that Alexei was a cool guy.  

“That’s the weird part bro. I messaged him after the first week that I did not hear from her just to check in to see if she’s doing okay and he says yes she’s doing great and if she’s not talking to me I should leave her alone. BUT GET THIS, I messaged Monoma two nights ago to ask him about her and he says she has not been to work in 2 weeks. He hasn't heard from her either, same with Mina. We’ve all been so busy lately I can't even run down to her apartment to see her unless my assistant adds it to my calendar 2 weeks in advance” Following this statement, Kirishima proceeded to stress his worries for y/n to Bakugo during their entire walk back to the apartment. 

He was worked up on the fact that his current hero schedule physically did not align in a manner that would let him go visit her. In between career talks at a bunch of high schools orchestrated by the agency, patrol and a few away missions, Kirishima was tired. This was the first evening in over a week that he and Bakugo were able to properly talk. But the truth was, Bakugo had picked up Y/N’s absence a few days back. After posting a series of well curated memes with the main purpose of having her respond, she didn't so he just assumed that she did not want to talk to him. He was not comfortable asking Kirishima if she was okay. His worries increased now since she was not talking to Kirishima and she always spoke to Kirishima.

In a way, he found himself being envious of her and Kirishima, they were so close. So many memories, so many inside jokes between them and Bakugo wanted that. He wanted that with her. He would give it all just to even be that close of a friend to her but he knew to himself that he wanted more for her and to be more to her. But he could not because she had Alexei and Alexei made her happy. He had gotten to the point where just seeing her happy with him made him happy. He knew to himself that he would be happier with her.

The next morning it was his day off but Kirishima had another career talk in another district so he would be gone for a few days again. As Bakugo moved around the kitchen, he opened the fridge and saw the Magnum ice cream carton that you insisted on keeping in their apartment for when you, Kirishima and him had your movie nights. As he fiddled with the carton, he made up his mind. He was going to see you to figure out what the hell was going on. Not for him though obviously, he was entirely going for Kirishima. Kirishima wanted to know if she was okay, Kirishima would feel great if he knew she was okay, Kirishima would stop worrying whenever the phone rang once he knew she was okay.

He wondered when he started using Kirishima’s name interchangeably with his.

Y/N’s apartment was a solid 10 minute drive away from the apartment he shared with Kirishima. He had been over there only a few times after driving you home when Alexei’s shifts ran too late but he knew the route like the back of his hand. It was just easier to memorise than to keep asking her for directions every time. The bag in his hand containing breakfast got heavier and his palms were getting sweatier with each step. He knocked gently on the door and stood still but yet very awkwardly outside the apartment door. The 305 number sign stamped onto her door has never seemed so interesting. He raised his hand to knock again when he heard the quiet click of a lock and the door gently slid inwards.

“Bakugo?” Y/n’s voice sounded a lot quieter than usual. She did not meet his eyes but she shuffled to the side and he nodded.

“Hey, uh, I, we, well Kirishima hasn't heard from you for a bit so I figured I’d come see how you were doing.” Bakugo said as he walked into the apartment. “We heard that you haven't been to work either so he’s kinda worried I guess. I brought you breakfast, I accidentally made extra so I figured I'd bring it.” He had lied straight through his teeth, Bakugo cooked too meticulously to accidentally cook extra of her favourite breakfast dish that you had mentioned to him offhandedly while out to dinner with the class. But he had to lie, he was not Alexei. He could not show up to her apartment with the intentionally made breakfast. 

As he processed his words, he took a long look around her apartment and was shocked. It was so not her. She made a point to constantly keep her windows in as she constantly said “sunlight burns out my sadness” whenever she was yanking open windows in his apartment. She made a point to keep her apartment neat and not dusty since she had severe dust allergies. But the current apartment was the exact opposite. All the curtains were shut, the windows were sealed twice, clothes were piled in the chair, her agency assigned duffel was dropped by the door  and it was dusty. 

It scared him

What happened to her? Did Alexei know? If he did, why didn't he tell Kirishima? How long had it been since she locked herself away?

His thoughts were broken by a series of quick and consecutive sneezes. He turned towards her and arched his eyebrow.

“Are you doing okay y/n?”

She laughed, “I don't think so.”

“Does Alexei know? He told Kirishima-”

“What do you mean he spoke to Kirishima?” her words cut him off and for the first time since he was there, she looked at him directly in his eyes. 

His heart broke. This was not his, no Alexei’s, NO HIS, this was not his y/n. Her eyes looked dull, she had dark bags, her cheeks looked hollowed and she just looked tired. He sighed and rubbed at his eyes harshly. 

“We’ll talk about that in a second, please just eat the food first.” His “for me” was silent at the end of the sentence. Bakugo held her shoulders and made her sit on the bar stool in the kitchen. He pushed the bag of food towards her and began yanking open curtains and windows when he heard the bag rustle. On a whim, he decided to open her fridge to get her something to drink and it was empty. A few almost empty cartons of fruit juice, a slab of cheese and an egg. He turned towards her and cocked his eyebrow in her direction. Her cheeks flushed and she bent her head, “I haven't been able to go grocery shopping for a while.”

“I’m taking you today and I don't care what you have to say.”

He was now standing in front of her, the counter the only thing separating them. Bakugo dropped his chin onto his palms and looked at her.

“Okay, now tell me what's going on and we’re going to decide how we’re going to fix it.” his usage of the automatic “we” shocked himself but he was not lying. He was going to get to the bottom of everything and he was going to help you as much as he could.

[dreadeddiaries]

It was a long day, and coming back home to your big fluff ball was all you needed. On placing your shoes in the shoe rack you called out to him

"Bo? Are you home?"

And there it was a loud thud and tapping noises which made you smile thinking he must have been excersing in the shared bedroom.

"Y/N I MISSED YOU SO MUCH" engulfing you in a hug that almost took your breath away...literally, was sweet but somehow today, that seemed to not have any effect on your sour mood. Being with you for three years made bokuto perceptive to your subtle mood changes, the slight forced smile you gave was such the indication. Smiling he let go and ushered you to the bathroom saying to freshen up.

As you felt the warm water sliding down your back you felt the door click.

"Bo?"

"Hmm yea lovebug. Is it ok if I join you?"

Reluctant but you knew you couldn't say no to him

"Hmm yea"

As he entered, body slowly getting drenched with made his abs and built figure look chisled and shiny. As he came behind you he rubbed circles on your back knowing it soothed you.

You leaned back into his touch letting him access to your nape which he gladly adorned with kisses of love and comfort.

"You know, I love the way you fit into me"

"Hmm?"

"I love the little smile you have when you cook, the nose scrunch you do when you want to beat a level in the game you play, I love the way you do your best in everything even if it's hard. I love your drool in the morning that you blame on the dog. Love the Lil dance you do when you eat your favorite foods, love the blush that you carry when I praise you for something you worked hard on"

You were lucky you were in the shower because it carried your tears with you.

"I love everything about my Lil starshine and I wouldn't change anything about you" he said as he hugged you, sobbing into his arms you knew, despite his absent mindedness he made yku the happiest you've ever been and that's all that mattered.

That you love him and he loves you.

[dreadeddiaries]

Astronomy for amateurs by Camille Flammarion.

[dreadeddiaries]

A cheer of laughter echoing through the walls and noises of hurried footsteps were only heard within the walls of four, you skipped past the table swinging from left to right in a playful manner teasing him "~ hehe you cant catch me~" "Oh really!" He said as he reached out to grab your wrist only to swipe his fingers across your smooth skin.

Squeals and laughter once echoing as you ran up the stairs into the bedroom, you didnt know when the play started but with the way you were huffing it sure must have been long.

As you heard footsteps approaching you tried to catch his face only to be pushed onto the bed having him kiss your entire face

"Caught you" said suna with his voice faltering as he tired out.

As he laid on top of you and your fingers itching his fluffy hair he looked up, smiled

"You know....I dont really believe in being born again, but if I were to be born, I want you. I want you to be with me in all my lives I can live, I dont think I would want to live without you. " he said kissing you and placing himself so that you could feel his breath on your neck.

Grateful. You were grateful for him

"Me too. Together for all eternity"

[dreadeddiaries]

There were moments where he truly loved you, dont get him wrong...he still does but with what's laid out in front of him, your pretty little face drenched with sweat looking fucked up, confronted with pleasure as you begged him to go deeper, to fuck you like he means it, he could feel nothing but dominance running through his veins as he fucked the life out of you.

He did love you but when it came to ruining you, he took every chance he got to love you like it's his last.

[dreadeddiaries]

Because sometimes he needed you, he would never verbally admit it but oh dear god when you walked out of the shower, hair slightly wet from the edges as drops of water rolled down your chin, the way you clothes hung onto you in the most innocently seductive way enhancing your every movement.

The way you carefully made your way around the crowd to find a seat beside him because he knew you were most comfortable around him, the way you smile always lingered around longer when with him, the moles(or freckles) on your face that seemed to make your face tens times more attractive.

It was in the way that you existed felt like heaven to him, the way you seemed so perfect to him, understanding him as he understood you or atleast tried to.

He would always find you cheering him on as you were the loudest in the crowd, or maybe he just focused on you the most. He would always find an excuse to stay next to you, saying "osamu told me you liked this cake, so I brought it on the way. Wanna eat it together?"

He didnt like cakes as much but they definitely felt a bit easier to take in when with you.

It was always so calm when he got together with you, when you would share your opinions on something that made your eyes light up, he always ended up remembering everything about that topic even if he wants interested in them before.

He was always there for you as you were for him and sometimes...just sometimes he questioned how he ended up landing such an amazing person like you but you always caught whim of those negative thoughts and in your own sweet way you always reassured him

It was either in the form of poetry or cooking..you would say stupid stuff like

"So the way the sun and moon are needed for each other..we need each other too right?"

Or

"So you see when cooking with rice and egg, soy sauce and sesame oil is important"

It was stupid..but somehow it always eased his mind.

You eased him.

You made him feel comfort.

And for that he was always thankful.