drujohnston - Tumblr blog

[drujohnston]

Mike ordered a normal sized pretzel put through the "Honey I Blew Up The Kid" machine. @dr_nooch

[drujohnston]

I am so proud to be apart of this show.

Season Finale! 

Ira Glass helped us out and became our studio guardian for the day while we took our audience out on a road trip. This was such a fun season, and here’s hoping that we get to do it again real soon. 

[drujohnston]

I’m so happy that this series is now seeing the light of day. Everyone in it is so goddamn talented and I am so honored to work with all of these Brinkman knuckleheads.

UCB Comedy is now on Vimeo! 

Check out Episode 1 of Life Support, a dark new series from Brinkman.

[drujohnston]

PARTY BUS SINGING BILLY JOEL! #mudonbeck

[drujohnston]

The hundreds of books I've decided to donate and the one I decided I couldn't do without.

[drujohnston]

This summer has been a lot of fun. Thank you #TCGS

[drujohnston]

An artist prepares. #tcgsfinale

[drujohnston]

JD is trying out his new Virtual Reality Band™.

[drujohnston]

Walked into work today to find that @gregkdorris viral Greg/Corey cup had taken its own life. #RIP

[drujohnston]

I don’t care what NASA finds on Kepler-452b but I’m not calling it intelligent life until I’m sure it’s seen The Wire.

I don’t care what NASA finds on Kepler-452b but I’m not calling it intelligent life until I’m sure it’s seen The Wire. Character development, story structure, a succinct cultural message about poverty in America, The Wire is the most intelligent show that’s ever been on television, and if they haven’t seen it, how smart can they be? I’m not threatened or intimidated by anyone, especially an alien species, if they don’t know who McNulty is. And I really doubt any of them do. They live in space, and probably don’t have an HBOGo password. And if they’ve paid for HBO Now, they’re suckers and I respect them even less.

Stephen Hawking keeps worrying that if we find intelligent alien life we’ll all be colonized and conquered, and I’m just not buying it. Straight up, I don’t think the aliens are as smart as me. I guarantee you I got a better SAT score than any of them. 1310. Now is that score perfect? No. But is it better than literally any alien? Uh, yeah. Way better.

The likelihood that any of these aliens has even taken the SAT is low. They probably don’t even understand the difference between the ACT and the SAT. So forgive me if I’m not quaking in my boots at the thought of a bunch of community college aliens colonizing me. And before any of you say, “We can’t judge the alien’s intelligence on a standardized test,” let me assure you that I get it. I’ve read Malcolm Gladwell. But I don’t think any of them would thrive in a liberal arts, small classroom school either. I doubt they speak English. They might not even have mouths.

In all likelihood the aliens are complete waste. And boring. I guarantee you I know better restaurants to go to in Brooklyn, so I’m bound to be more popular. I know the details of whiskey and bourbon better than them, so I’m not worried about losing any dates. And I’m not going to share these secrets here, but let’s just say I have a few tricks to get extra frequent flier miles. It involves credit cards. Let’s see an alien figure that out.

NASA can find as much life as they want in the universe. With their Kepler program they’ve found two habitable planets thus far. Great. But will they colonize us? Not here on Earth. Unless I can sit down and have an open talk with one of these aliens about why Stringer Bell is the most nuanced character in television history, you will never be able to convince me we’ve found intelligent life. And I swear to god if these aliens say they like Breaking Bad better NASA better just say pass and move on.

[drujohnston]

Link to the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wTanfxgP3wE

I can’t believe Wil Wheaton reblogged this.

Some say I’m doing God’s work. But I maintain I’m just a man.

[drujohnston]

Some say I’m doing God’s work. But I maintain I’m just a man. Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wTanfxgP3wE

[drujohnston]

And then @connorratliff started warming up the audience. #TCGS

[drujohnston]

It's been a great day. Shooting Neanderthal Ted Talks for @ucbcomedy

[drujohnston]

Neanderthal Mic Check with @donfanelli for @ucbcomedy

[drujohnston]

🎶 Noooo onnneee fights like @karelsincharge 🎶

[drujohnston]

"We bring your puns to life." -Chris Gethard. Look at our video game corner! #TCGS