eciipse06

[eciipse06]

How do I stop people from being suspicious of me

My mum keeps asking if I'm ok while eating dinner and I feel like she knows something's wrong.

I try to eat slowly and relatively small amounts but I have to come up with an excuse every time (not hungry, food is still hot, etc) and idk if there's anything I can do to make her less suspicious

Any suggestions?

[eciipse06]

I wish someone would notice that I'm not okay

I don't blame them but I just want someone to genuinely ask if I'm alright

I'd probably still lie but at least I would know that they actually care 🥲

[eciipse06]

I hate summer because it's too hot to workout

I can go on walks but I can't do any workouts, I feel so dizzy like omg

Uk summer is no joke because why is it so humid. And it's hotter inside than it is outside but I burn really easily so I can't be out for too long 😭

[eciipse06]

I've been eating so much recently (no idea how many c@lories), I hate it so much and I hate myself SO MUCH

I don't know what to do, eating is genuinely the only thing I can think about but it makes me feel so horrible and I just want to get back into the depths of @na

Is there anything I can do to motivate myself and distract myself from eating?

I think it has something to do with feeling so depressed this past week. Like I have no energy to do anything, even workout and I think I've always been an emotional eater so I just feel like absolute shit rn 😓

[eciipse06]

Why's this genuinely the most motivating thing I've seen today. Also very fitting, I usually get food ads but I definitely prefer this 😂

[eciipse06]

Ugh I need to stop f@sting for more than 24h because it ALWAYS results in a binge so is completely pointless and I'm actually worse off than if I was to just eat like 600-800 cals each day 😮‍💨

It feels so good tho I don't want to give it up :(

[eciipse06]

I'm so hungry and idk why. I hate it

It's never bothered me before but rn I just want to eat, constantly

I literally eat omad everyday and have done for months and never had an issue with it until now and I have no idea why 😭

[eciipse06]

I'm going to Italy for a week next month and I need low cal food recommendations that I can eat when I'm there

I'll restrict as much as possible and we'll be doing a lot of walking but I'll be with my friends so I can't be too suspicious :/

I'm so scared tho cuz I'm pretty sure it's mostly like bread and pasta which absolutely terrifies me ���😢

[eciipse06]

This has happened to me and istg it's the best feeling ever 🥰

Thinspo Imagine

✨ Imagine This…

It’s late afternoon. The house is quiet, the kind of quiet that invites your mind to wander. You feel that familiar itch — not in your stomach, but in your thoughts. You’re not hungry. You just… want something. You walk toward the kitchen without even thinking.

But then—

You stop.

You stand there, hand on the pantry door, and instead of opening it, you pause.

You take a breath. Deep, slow.

And something shifts in you.

You see yourself—clearer than ever. Not just today’s version of you, but the one you’re becoming. Strong. Disciplined. Clear-headed. Confident in your choices. Not ruled by impulses or boredom or old habits, but by a deep inner peace that says, “I’ve got this.”

You walk away from the pantry.

Not because it’s wrong to eat—but because you know your worth.

You know that every time you resist giving in to that temporary urge, you’re building something permanent: self-trust.

You’re keeping a promise to yourself.

And that matters.

You sit down in your space—maybe it’s by a window, maybe it’s your bed. Light filters in. You grab your journal, or your phone, or you just close your eyes and breathe. You let the feeling of accomplishment fill you up, warm and grounding.

You remind yourself:

“I am not empty. I am not lacking. I am not bored with life—I am just not yet fully engaged with what brings me joy.”

So you do one small thing.

You text someone you love. Maybe your fiancé. You say something simple like, “Just thinking about you.” It makes you smile. That connection, that spark—it reminds you that you’re not alone in any of this. You are building a life, brick by brick, decision by decision. And this moment? This choice to walk away from the thing that doesn’t serve you? That is a brick. A solid one.

You get up and stretch. The stiffness in your shoulders eases. You put on a playlist that makes you feel something—strong, soft, alive. You hum a little. Maybe even dance a bit. You’re not thinking about snacks anymore. You’re in your body. You’re in your life.

And for a second, you feel proud.

Like, really proud.

Because no one saw you do this.

No one cheered.

No one handed you a medal.

But you know what this moment cost.

And you know what it’s building.

This is the kind of self-respect that no one can give you, and no one can take away.

This is you, learning that comfort doesn’t have to come from food.

That rest doesn’t require indulgence.

That you can sit with a feeling and let it pass—like a wave—and still be standing.

Later, when you look back on this day, you’ll remember this part.

Not the snack you didn’t eat.

Not the urge you felt.

But the power in choosing differently. The quiet victory. The steady becoming.

And the next time you feel that itch—the pull to distract, to numb, to wander back to the kitchen—you’ll remember that you already won once. And you can do it again.

You’re not just avoiding boredom anymore.

You’re building a life that’s so rich, so full of meaning, that boredom doesn’t even stand a chance.

So take a deep breath now.

Feel it in your chest.

You’re doing this.

You’re already on the path.

And you’re not turning back.

Not this time.

Not ever.

[eciipse06]

how are you feeling today? <3

I'm okay :)

Got results back from mocks I did a few weeks ago which I'm not happy about (failing biology ✌️) but I haven't eaten yet today and I've done a lot of walking to make up for eating lots yesterday so that's nice at least 🥲

Hope you're doing well ❤️

[eciipse06]

Literally! Makes no sense 😔

When I eat 100 calories over my deficit so I eat 1,000 calories more cus what’s the difference

[eciipse06]

I overate and now I'm freaking out

I'm almost certain I ate at or over my maintenance today and Idk what to do 😭

I wish I could pur9e but I have emetophobia and also promised myself I would never make myself throw up because ik how bad it is but I still have the urge to do it

I genuinely feel so sick and disgusted rn, I hate myself so much, why can't I just control myself

I'll do whatever I can to burn it off tomorrow (I'll put it here for accountability)

-walk home from school (40min walk)

-skip breakfast and lunch + no snacking

-try to skip dinner/eat as little as possible

-workout after dinner (try to equal the cals eaten)

-go for a walk at break time

Other suggestions are very welcome

(before I get weird comments- no I do not need a coach 🙄)

If you read all of this ty ily guys 🫶

[eciipse06]

I got a cute dress today but it's one of those tight fitting dresses so I'm using it as motivation

I can only wear the dress if I don't eat

[eciipse06]

Currently watching the new season of Ginny and Georgia and omg I love Abby so much

I'm glad she's in this season more ❤️

Also it's kinda triggering which I really need rn :]

[eciipse06]

If I don't lose weight this month it's literally homophobic

[eciipse06]

[eciipse06]

Ugh I'm doing so bad rn

I'm getting hungry by like lunchtime (I very rarely eat more than 1 meal and a snack a day) and idk what to do

I don't want to eat, I'm not losing and I desperately need to I'm actually going to go insane

I've never hated myself more than I do right now but I can't bring myself to do anything about it

I want this so desperately but the more I want it the harder it is 😔

At this point I wish I could just disappear. Like I don't want to d!e but I kinda want to just not exist anymore yk?

Depressing post today but oh well, this is why I try not to post at night. Hope you guys are doing better than me 🥲