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taking a class on sex this semester which has resulted in many fun things like "sex activity" and "sex final" being added to my planner. being very mature and serious about this .

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I haven't abandoned this story. I just put it on the back burner for now. The story is just on a small vacation. It is currently out of office. It can't come to the phone right now. It just fell under my bed to sleep with the monsters. It never left my head. It is everywhere - except on paper.

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Leave it to a guy being a grump about the ren faire to almost make me log in to my defunct reddit account.

For someone concerned about "historical accuracy" you would think they would know that rennaisance faires were started by the Rennaisance Pleasure Faire of Southern California in 1962 by blacklisted Hollywood fags and commies. If you didn't want to dance around with fairies in the woods you should have joined your local civil war reenactors

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never forget the universal rule of the order of things: People Will Not Read It

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and it’s like. don’t get me wrong. i understand why it’s controversial to say that your boundaries WILL get crossed. like i get it. but listen. are you mythologizing sex? are you putting it on a pedestal where it is completely separate from other human actions? are there other social situations where you believe there is ZERO margin for error? if you genuinely believe that no mistakes or accidents ever happen during sex between consenting adults, i can only imagine you’ve never had sex, you don’t make your partners feel safe coming to you when they feel uncomfortable, or you have a fundamental misunderstanding of how boundaries work. it’s not that it’s GOOD or that we should NORMALIZE crossing boundaries, it’s that we recognize that human interaction is complicated and sometimes there’s stuff to work through rather than just burning it all down.

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lying in front of the street cleaner

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astronomy club sent up a weather balloon w a gopro in it last friday. put in three packs of fruit snacks so they could have a giggle over eating fruit snacks that had been to space.

balloon went up into inner space, about 90,000 feet. came down right near the dinosaur park. a few physics teachers drive out to get it, crack it open on the way home to start watching the footage.

fruit snacks are missing.

multiple sources confirm that fruit snacks were put in balloon and sealed in with duct tape. physics teachers check entire balloon. no fruit snacks.

physics teachers watch footage. all 7 hours of it. right in the middle of footage, there are about 8 minutes of visual and audio static when balloon is in orbit. no other interference with balloon recorded.

conclusions: ???????

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One of the greatest additions to a post ever

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PSA: never discuss private affairs in your DMs, especially contraception and abortion. Social media moguls will absolutely sell you out to the government. There are already cases of people being charged based on evidence in their DMs.

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Say what you want to about the X-Men movies, but Rogue telling Logan he should wear a seat belt and him scoffing at her only to immediately be thrown through the front windshield was the most Wolverine™️ thing that could have possibly happened.

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Me: *looking at a porcelain hand in the home decor aisle of a store* if I lost my hands in some kind of tragic accident, I’d decorate my entire home with hand-shaped things. Then I’d invite guests over for like, dinner parties and such and sit there expectantly just basking in their discomfort.

My boyfriend: Do you hear what you say when you talk? Do you know what you just said to me?

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bad guy: *lowering me into a pit of piranhas*

me: just so you know that pool is not big enough for them at all and they also don't have any foliage to hide within in order to feel safe and by the way you obviously haven't been feeding them enough if they're ready to rend the flesh from my bone, the water looks scummy, and your pulley system looks extremely unsafe and none of your goons are wearing PPE despite the jagged spikes and open leaky pipes and-

bad guy: *frantically lowering the crank faster* please just die

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i was looking up synonyms for tired and seeing these two next to each other gave me whiplash

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i actually get a bit annoyed with people who get a bit annoyed when people say “sorry” in response to their bad news. “why are you apologizing you didn’t do anything :/” like okay well a) you don’t know that and actually yes i am the secret architect of all your woes and have been this whole time, way to refuse to acknowledge a woman (gender neutral)’s accomplishments. and b) we’re both fluent english speakers so you know perfectly well that “sorry” isn’t always an apology and is very commonly used as an expression of general regret or sympathy. not in this case, because i have been your secret nemesis for years, meticulously plotting your every misery, but, like, in general

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Was scrolling through AO3 and found this gem

Enemy to parent is a trope we have to popularise lmao