ekaitzekourtzi

[ekaitzekourtzi]

Credit to the original post

25 days of agere moodboard

Day 3: Your Favourite Kid’s Book: I love DK's Eyewitness series since I was actually little. Now I want to own the updated version again.

[ekaitzekourtzi]

[ekaitzekourtzi]

[ekaitzekourtzi]

Stars I made for the farmers market 🥹⭐️

[ekaitzekourtzi]

Normalize stimming! How do you stim? I pinch my hands like a crab when im excited~

[ekaitzekourtzi]

don't give up

[ekaitzekourtzi]

I drew the gang,

[ekaitzekourtzi]

i know we're all sick of self-care being a marketing tactic now, but i don't think a lot of us have any other concept of self-care beyond what companies have tried to sell us, so i thought i'd share my favorite self-care hand out

brought to you by how mad i just got at a Target ad

[ekaitzekourtzi]

Me too girl tf

[ekaitzekourtzi]

Glen Martin Taylor, “but i am safe in here.”

[ekaitzekourtzi]

[ekaitzekourtzi]

I wish it was easier to talk about mobile phone addiction without sounding like a boomer

[ekaitzekourtzi]

Listing my meltdown patterns for myself to refer back to since it always somehow takes me by surprise:

Your triggers are socializing, decision-making, and tight clothing. Don't do too much of any in one day.

The first thing to go is the mask. You will slip into a more authentic version of yourself ... whether you want to or not.

You will start feeling fatigue, and smiling will be more difficult, but the high of novelty dopamine during whatever you're doing will drown out this initial signal.

Without further warning, you will go into shutdown mode. You will get quiet and straightfaced. You're much too polite to tell someone. (btw people can tell that you hate being there, you're not slick)

You will feel trapped ... like the Animal. Like you must get out. Possibly pacing around the enclosure.

When not moving or unable to move, your mind will be scurrying from wall to wall trying not to accept the fact that it is in fact Trapped

When Trapped starts to sink in you have an hour tops. Your fidgeting will increase and stimuli will begin causing you pain. This is when you stop being Polite and start being Assertive because the next thing to go is your speech.

Words become difficult, but not impossible. They take more effort but you don't really know what's going to come out. If you don't end this now, you will have to choose between saying something you do NOT want to say or being silent.

If you continue to push past the blaring alarms going off in your head, People begin Asking Questions, especially "are you okay." Stop lying to them.

Processing words that are spoken to you becomes nigh impossible. This will frustrate you and push you deeper into the meltdown. Request space and quiet with the words you have left.

You cry without speech OR spew venom uncontrollably during meltdowns if you tip past the boiling point. You shrivel like a prune or explode like a volcano. It depends on the trigger.

You mostly say things that hurt people during the volcanoes. You hurt your own feelings. Unfortunately, all of it is true. None of it is productive ... but it must be purged.

Time spent draining battery and time spent recovering is 1:1 and sleeping somehow does not count. You must engage your brain in calming activities by choice.

[ekaitzekourtzi]

A Checklist Of Possible Reasons I Am Upset, To Review When I Can't Seem To Figure It Out:

did not eat

new hyperfixation and no time for it

have not done a creative in 24 hrs

Bad Sounds

clothes are touching my body

cold

people

one (1) comment is stuck in my brain like a popcorn kernel

last time I drank water was ??????

nervous nervous nervous nervous

got a Slightly Worse grade than expected

last hug was ??????

slept a full 45 minutes

lonely ............

guts are shredding (again)

have not seen sunlight in 24 hrs

stuck inside

too much screen time

Yay Overwhelm

room is disaster area

have not talked to Person in a while

bored

imposter phenomenon (again)

no current routine

how long have I been working???

Too Much Socialization

and then. and THEN. I may consider:

something is actually wrong

[ekaitzekourtzi]

So uh. some interesting discoveries have been made lately

My chiropractor asked me when I got diagnosed with EDS. Friends, I do not have an EDS diagnosis. might explain why I can't even go to sleep without feeling like I got hit by a truck ... but if I did that would mean that technically I have a chronic illness??? that I have chronic pain and I just went through 20+ years of my life not knowing it?? rad

Still not great at talking when I have a meltdown. I am this *pinch* close to buying or making some communication cards. IDK what to put on them though. seems silly to do so, but talking is just so hard and I'd rather not if I don't have to. Is there a digital version somewhere that I could keep on my phone?

Neither CBD nor CBG oil works on me for some reason. even as much as 2 ml. I'm convinced I could literally drink the bottle and it wouldn't do anything. This is coming from the girl who takes Aleve D and gets woozy.

Music is SO much more fun when you're not doing it for homework lol

[ekaitzekourtzi]

Autism and ADHD Gift Guide

Neurodivergent_lou