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Seeking Pushers & Becoming Aware of Pullers ================================= Sometimes success is right around the corner and you don't see it, because the pain you're experiencing right now is too great to focus on what's to come. Right now...your faith is being tested and your will is about to shatter. That old familiar voice of enticing you to rest is whispering in your ear, "It's ok, walk a little. Rest a little more. Maybe you need to stop. I think this isn't for you. You're just not good at this." And down it spirals and grows into this monster that becomes far bigger than you can handle. Then you choose whether to listen to this voice that pulls you into comfort or create the voice that pushes you into struggle. It's in the struggle that strength is born. "Come on, just a little bit further. I know you're tired, just think how great your rest will feel after you've accomplished your goal! If you keep this up, you WILL be amazing, I promise you! Look at you, you're choosing something better for yourself. You deserve to earn your rest, no freebie slacker comforts here! You are blessed with the gifts of being able to do what you can with what you've got, take it and run!" Be grateful, keep growing and give back to those who need it most.

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Broken Beauty | Golden Effort | Strength from Struggle ======================================= Let's "break" down the significance of this fact. The key word here is "repair" and what they are repairing it with is "gold".

By not replacing the space in between with the original material is significant, since they are filling the empty space with something much more valuable and beautiful.

We all have struggles and from time to time, we suffer pain on many levels. Some are stress fractures, some are scratches and some are deep wounds.

But if those spaces are left ignored and not repaired... eventually it will fall apart and be tossed to the way side.

Decide.

What do you want your life to be filled with? A trail of broken pieces? or of beautiful effort?

I'm very old fashioned living in a new age world. I come from a time where if something of sentimental valuable that you had was broken... then you do your best to fix it or repurpose it. I guess that where my stubbornness comes from.

If you are my friend... or close family member... I can guarantee you this.

There will come a time where I might let you down, I might disappoint you, and I make mistakes. Not because I'm human... but because I am flawed and imperfect.

But know this... I will always try to do right by you and to repair it with "gold".

If I didn't know any better... I will learn how to be better. If I already knew better and didn't make a good decision... I will accept responsibility.

The beauty and structure disappears once the effort stops.

Effort IS gold.

Take the time to see the value of the people around you today. Some bearing gold "just for you" and some carry it around to "get something from you".

Everyone's form effort is different and recognizing which is which becomes the appreciation that we all have once we discover the "beautiful sentiment" behind it.

I'm rooting for you.

Keep trying... fill in those cracks with gold... and tell me all about it.

LOVE | STRENGTH | HONOR | TRIBE

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Everyone asks how I stay so positive and they tend to assume I never have any problems to deal with. Truth is...we all deal with things. Good and bad. What you focus your energies into will determine what you end up dealing with, over and over again. You will handle all that you allow to enter into your kingdom. You are the responsible one for what you go through. Ultimately, you decide what goes as things are happening around you. There were days where I'd be so bogged down with other people's stresses and troubles, I allowed it to hinder and affect my life, my family and my well being. Nowadays, I try to give empathy versus sympathy. I have always had a helping heart. And that helping heart has landed me in some tough situations from allowing some to take advantage of my patience and abusing my forgiveness in the past. So to better utilize that same spirit while protecting its pure intent, I offer more of an understanding ear paired with advice to move to a solution. When people ask for advice on tough situations, I always warn them first with this... "Do you want me to tell you what you NEED to hear? Or what you WANT to hear?" They always ponder on this for a second and then they do one of two things. They either say, "Tell me what I need to hear" and then they cringe, knowing that attached to the advice will come some work and tough decision making...or they say, "I just want you to back me up while I vent. I don't need to hear you say anything." If you say the latter...I will point to my door and you can see yourself out. Know that when you come to someone like me...my goal is to help improve everything around me, even if it's just a teeny bit. If you deny me that opportunity...you are literally taking your shit, placing it on my doorstep and walking away. I am not a bucket to hold your burdens. I will not store that negative energy in my life. I did not do anything to deserve to have to carry that around and I refuse to spend all my resources on problems that you can and should fix yourself. Instead, I'd rather act as a filter for you. As a mentor and guide, I'll pinpoint the things you can get rid of and help you deal with that. I'll point you in the right direction to save you some time. I'll arm you with knowledge to help you fight your battles. And I'll always be proud of you for the work you did to take care of yourself, because I gave you the opportunity to exercise how to be powerful in your kingdom. I will never deny people of that chance to show how capable they are to being successful. So, what's with the rant? Simply put...this is the same guidance I seek from my own mentors, guides and leaders. Powerful individuals who focus on growth, solutions and community. I would not be who I am without them today, and I never miss the chance to acknowledge what they have done for me. I did not get to where I am all by myself, and I will always be grateful to everyone who had a part in my growth. Loyalty, Legacy and Tribe. Love, Strength and Honor. #impactallday #lovestrengthhonor #therearenovictimsonlyvolunteers #empathyvssympathy #onetribe #sayockali #worldthaiboxingassociation #cdobjj #loyaltylegacytribe

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"Passing The Torch"

There are those that watch things happen, and then there are those that make things happen. Joe was one who loved to learn and especially had a passion to pass knowledge and insight to others through teaching.

We had just moved into our 2nd new location off of Central Drive, an industrial park, and were in the process of pulling some furniture from the truck. Joe happened to swing by to meet us, as he was referred by my brother, Lou to come check out our academy. My first experience in meeting Joe was his offering to help me carry a bench into the school He barely knew us and wasn’t even a student yet. But he stayed the whole day helping us get settled and getting to know us better.

Later, he officially joined the IMPACT Tribe and started training in FMA (Filipino Martial Arts) so he could pass that onto his own family.

He openly gave so much of himself to help total strangers that day, and left as friends.

Everyone that has ever known him, has had the experience of being in the presence of a man who loved to share and partake in knowledge. He loved to learn and was always good about enjoying the “journey” as opposed to just the “goal”. Even more than that, he loved the company he had with him on his journeys.

He was a family man.

It wasn’t something that he had to prove to anyone. He was simply that. A family man. When he trained with us, he was happy to be with his martial arts family. When he’d surf, he loved his surfing family. During big events and celebrations, he always supported his friends and family. In everything else, he had his own family, the beautiful girls by his side, his gentle wife Caroline and his daughter Cara Joelle, so full of love and energy. He is truly blessed with love from everyone he’s ever met.

Every time we saw him, there were always two prominent things that stood out, no matter what we were training that day, who he happened to partner with or what the event was…

His smile and his kind words.

Our hearts are heavy that you are no longer here with us brother Joselito, but it will remain full of joy with your memory. Love, Strength and Honor.

——————————————————————————

Wake/Visitation Friday December 26 from 6pm to 8pm Woodlawn Funeral Home 6329 E. Virginia Beach Blvd, Norfolk, VA 23502 757-461-4054 http://www.woodlawngroup.com

Funeral Mass Saturday December 27, 2014 at 2pm St. Matthew’s Catholic Church 3314 Sandra Lane, Virginia Beach, VA 23464 757-420-6310 http://saintmatts.net

Blog About Joe by Kuya Justin http://www.ninjasdontsweat.com/blog/kuya Joe’s Thank You Video http://youtu.be/zfedtCtXvrE Joe’s Memorial Guestbook http://m.legacy.com/guestbooks/pilotonline/guestbook.aspx?pid=173563506&n=joselito-r-ubial Please share any photos you have of Joe here: https://www.flickr.com/photos/joeubial For those who are able to assist the family at this difficult time, please visit this link to donate: http://www.gofundme.com/joeubial

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Happy Teacher's Day to all our TBA Krus, Ajarns and also to Grandmaster Chai for all they do in teaching and sharing Muay Thai with us. A big thank you to my first instructor for his patience and support throughout my training, Ervin. Thank you all for helping us be the best we can be. Wai.

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Tigresa 

I had the honor of witnessing my baby girl take her next step up in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, alongside our IMPACT Tribe and Carlos David Oliveira BJJ friends and family.  It was such a blessing to see her and her fellow students fight through such a tough test and to emerge with new eyes in seeing where their training has taken them.

We were also lucky to have special guest, Renee Forte with us on this day. He is a BJJ Black Belt under Professor David and fought in the Ultimate Fighter: Brazil.

This event happened to be on my high school's 20th reunion, and I was a bit sad about not being able to make it, but I wouldn't miss seeing this great achievement for the world. There will be other reunions, but you only get your blue belt once.

Our BJJ Ladies surprised Animae with a late birthday rash guard by Meerkatsu! It was out of stock at the time, and as soon as we got it in, Ateh Carrie jumped on ordering it, just in time for this seminar and testing!  We presented it to her right before the seminar to give her that added magical boost to take on her BJJ Blue Belt testing! She absolutely loved it and says thank you to everyone who pitched in for her dream rash guard.

What an amazing day! We spent the entire day immersed in BJJ with the best people around and celebrated everyone's hard work over the years to get to where they are now.  Ervin and I are so proud of her for sticking to it.  She truly is a "tiger" at heart.

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Fearful Action < Brave Heart

I was thinking about all that had happened right before, during and after my knee surgery.

My courage, confidence and patience were tested in ways that had broken my spirit, several times. Even with the support and encouragement from others, I had fallen into a pretty deep depression.

So I marinated on the impact that this had on me. What was it exactly that was hard to deal with?

Did surgery suck? Not really. It was fast. Same day, very to the point and they did their job.

Did recovery suck? Kind of. But every single day is recovery. So improving by 1% every day was happening all by itself.

So what was my “real” obstacle?

It was fear.

False Evidence Appearing Real or Forget Everything And Run

I seemed that my confidence had depleted over time during recovery when I was fearful of falling while on crutches for 2-3 months. Afraid to hug the little kids after class for fear of them running at me for a hug and bumping into my leg. Scared to train, move, run, jump, or do anything at all, for fear of finding myself back in the doctors office being told I need surgery again.

I was scared.

All the freaking time…

Everywhere I went…

I was always so focused on what hurt me.

No wonder I couldn’t move forward!

Yes, I can walk now. It’s been about 4 months since surgery. I can move around almost like it never happened. I still have a few pains here and there, but for the most part, I’m pretty functional again.

I’ve noticed that since I was cleared to train (lightly) again, I have been enthusiastic to jump onto the mat again, but my experience is not like it was before. A new nemesis made training more challenging than before. That nemesis was my own fear of getting hurt again.

That fear stripped away the joy I once felt when training. It took everything that my patience, confidence and courage once gave to me. And the sad thing is, I let it happen.

Fear is necessary for survival. To protect ourselves from danger. To evoke action. Fight or flight. But living in a state of fear keeps us in a perpetual limbo of “decision debating” instead of “decision making”. Becoming aware of this has helped me finally understand what needs to be done.

So how do I find the happiness again?

Simply put… I choose to let go of being afraid.

Drop the crutches and run.

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The Warrior Path

I remember wanting to train in the martial arts at a young age, but never had to opportunity to.

I remember getting into fights as a kid. Having to protect my brother from bullies and protect myself from people who thought I didn’t belong. Racism was heavily present when I was in elementary school.

I remember being told that I could never be a martial artist because I was a girl. Because strong women during those times meant, not being able to find a husband. Or so I was told.

I remember fighting for my life and the lives of my brothers while we were growing up. Our neighborhood wasn’t an easy place for raising a family, nor was it the safest.

I remember. I never forgot.

And then… I had the opportunity.

So I snatched it with both hands and ran with it.

Muay Thai was my first love. And during that journey, obstacles and challenged arose during my path to black belt. Working multiple jobs, having my 2nd and 3rd children, going to college, starting my first business, being a wife and still trying to train.

What took most about 5 years to attain black belt, took me twice the amount of time. 10 years. A decade.

But I did not quit. I always seemed to find my way back to it, because it was the one thing that was a constant source of strength. A perpetual fountain of knowledge and growth for me to become stronger in mind, body and spirit.

Along the way I found healing through doing a few more styles that I was not comfortable with. Weapons training in FMA and close quarter sparring in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Who knew that I would end up loving those as much as I do now?

I honestly believe that I transformed into a black belt, about a year AFTER becoming one.

"Walking the walk" definitely was a testament to what I had become. And routinely staying on that path was proof to others that I embodied that honor.

Then one day, I couldn’t walk.

Everything came to a halt. I began to forget.

All I could think about was all the things I wasn’t able to do anymore.

The shift would’ve went downhill, if it weren’t for the reminders in what my purpose was. Three questions that I share with my students during a tough round of training.

Why am I doing this?

Who am I doing this for?

What is my goal?

Three simple questions to ask yourself when things get difficult. To remind yourself whether or not the fight is worth it.

We all forget when the going gets tough. All we focus on is only on relieving pain. Moving away from pain. It’s primal. It’s a “prey mindset” that I don’t want to have. Fear makes us forget to barrel forward and remove the “cause” of the pain.

So here’s your reminder, so YOU can remember your purpose. So we can all take control of what challenges may arise. We need to remember those three questions to set us back on the right path.

Because true warriors don’t spend a lot of time “talking the talk”, instead they prefer to “walk the walk”.

And I’m so grateful to be walking.

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Reminiscing on my very first Instructorship test under Ajarn Chai Sirisute. What an amazing (and nerve wrecking) experience! I was so nervous that I literally shook and I swear I forgot how to stand still. But in the end, I performed well and fought through one of the toughest pad rounds in my life.

I'm so grateful for my husband, our TBA family and to GM Chai for believing in me back then and for continuing to have faith in me now.

Grandmaster Chai’s seminar in Maryland this weekend was inspiring and filled with insight on what it should mean to be a TBA instructor. What got me even more, was him insisting that my husband, Ervin Quintin, present my instructor certificate to me at this seminar. Yes, family is very important to me, and to be a part of the TBA family is a privilege and an honor.

As I waited patiently to test, I couldn’t help but to think of the things along the way that set me on this journey.  It was surprising that I came this far, considering the following:

I did not start training young like most people nowadays

I was not naturally good at this, which required lots of time, patience and practice

I always seemed to put others before myself, which in turn, put me in a position where I was left behind while the people I helped went ahead of me.

It’s hard to admit, but all those things were against me, only because I let it hover over me like a dark cloud.  It was only until Ervin told me how much he wanted me to have the confidence in myself to achieve this goal, that I started to give myself a chance to try.  Along with GM Chai encouraging me to “Keep going” and “Never give up”, it helped remind me to stay focused along the way.

Grandmaster Chai really is the “father” of the TBA and treats all of us as his own.  Everytime I see him, he is so warm, welcoming and willing to give advice and encouragement to his students and their families.  In the time that I’ve known him, he’s helped turn my relationship with my parents into something I couldn’t ever imagine happening.  But I’ll save that story for another time.  In short, I’m a much happier person now than I was before I met him.  The level of gratitude and respect I have for this man is beyond words.

So when it came down to it, I got my gear on, tried to relax and think of why I was there.  And only one thing came to mind.

Family.

And that’s why I do this, all of this.  For my family, for yours and for all the families who make these opportunities possible for our future generations.

Congratulations to all those who tested along with me, it takes a lot of heart, desire and commitment to make it through everything you experience in life, but remember you are never alone.  May you all find what you are looking for in your journey through martial arts.  Be safe and take care.

A very big thank you to my pad holders, Kru Joe & Kru Toni-girl, for really giving me something to fight for.  I’ve had to privilege of meeting Kru Joe before the test and could see right away that this guy is skilled.  When he held pads for me, he was as tough as I would’ve expected him to be with any guy.  He caught me with a wicked foot jab to the floating rib during the test, oh man, did it hurt!  But afterwards he was very gracious and said, “The next time we meet, we will greet each other as family.”  Kru Toni-girl was quick and precise with sneaking in every strike during the 2nd portion of my test.  It’s funny how everything around you sounds like a mild hum in the midst of chaos.  I could hear my husband yelling out what I needed to do and hearing the people counting my kicks and knees.  All I could focus on was this fierce woman in front of me keeping what I needed just out of reach.  She really had me working for it.  I’ve had the chance to meet her for the first time at Thai Camp last year and a few times afterwards at seminars.  The girl I met back then and the girl holding for me for testing were two different people.  I was really grateful for her encouragement, advice and tough love.  Much respect to my pad holders.

And last but not least, Thank you to Grandmaster Chai and all that he has done and continues to do for all us.  On my path, I will do my best to lead our students down the path you have laid for all of us to follow.  Discipline, honor, and commitment.  No family should be without these things and I’m glad that you are there to remind us all of how important that truly is. Wai.

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Today I had my first experience in being able to free roll in BJJ, after 4 months of recovery from ACL replacement surgery. I won't lie, it was scary. Not that my partner was scary, oh no. He was actually very careful with putting in the fine balance of being mindful of my knee and also putting legitimate pressure on me during the roll. The scary part was feeling how much strength I had lost through the muscle atrophy during recovery. My grips burn out in about 10 seconds. I cannot kneel as deep as I used to and getting used to the 360 environment again was a teensy bit challenging, but I pressed on. My mind knows what to do, but my body is slow in following...and sometimes the response isn't there. Frustration set in a few times, but I had to remind myself that I needed to be patient and extremely grateful for the simple fact that I am still able to walk. I can walk. My brain still works. I can still teach and pass on knowledge. These three things have helped focus my negative mindset on the things I still have, rather than what I had lost. And I continue to gain ground with each tiny baby step I take towards my goal, to compete again. By the way...I was able to kneel in base with no support this morning! Level 2 (out of 10) pain, but totally bearable. It's shaping up to be a great week so far. Challenges are a great reminder of being able to improve every day.

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Same hairdo, different generations. The faux hawk I was rocking last year and the one that my baby niece is rocking now, is the same. Except she doesn't use gel. I think I'll pass the torch on this one. >;3

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Crazy Kids, Puzzled Parents and Mat Chats, Oh My!

"Fix my kid!"

We get that cry for help ALL THE TIME.

People walk into our martial arts academy with their kids, take a look around and say stuff like, "He needs an outlet, he’s out of control, do something!" or "She needs to learn to respect me and I heard martial arts is good for discipline."  I can’t imagine what it’s like for them when they’re wandering around aimlessly looking for help in other places.

What some people expect is a "quick fix" or "magic pill" to make all the problems and challenges with their kid go away.  This most certainly is not how we approach families who are seeking our help.  Instead, we believe that we need to work more like a "support system" for parents.  And we do this through having mat chats during all kids classes…every single day.

Something about that line, "Fix my kid" really hurts, and is difficult for me  to hear. What I’m really hearing is, "I need a quick fix for my kid!”

In some cases, parents desperately seek help and some just flat out avoid responsibility. I don’t know what the situation is from meeting the families for the first time, but I do try to understand and empathize with them on what they’ve already gone through. Some have tried absolutely everything while others clearly haven’t given themselves a chance to “fix” their own kid.

Any long term problem you may have is because it was influenced and/or allowed for a long period of time. To remedy this, the “fix” may take a lot longer than one expects. Sadly, most people don’t have the patience to put in this extra effort to correct the behavior and just avoid dealing with it all together.

As a mother of three, I wouldn’t dare judge another parent on why their kid is the way they are, but I will always offer a solution.  It’s really up to them on whether on not they take the advice and see if it works for them. I’m not an expert in parenting, but I think I’ve done a pretty good job so far. (^,^)  A big reason in how I was able to do this, was mainly because of my martial arts training.  Patience, problem solving, persistence and humor. I swear, having a sense of humor can really save your sanity.

The martial arts are about so much more than just techniques like kicking and punching. There are life lessons, skills and traits that can be developed along the way, with the right kind of guidance.

guid·ance

noun \ˈgī-dən(t)s\ : help or advice that tells you what to do : the act or process of guiding someone or something

There is “guiding" and then there is "forcing”.

Kids don’t take well to being forced.  In fact, no one does.

But when I had someone guide and mentor me, it was a whole new way of learning and taking action.  It was because I was driven on my own will to achieve, versus someone else making me do it.

After class, we’d sit and talk about the Powerful Word of the Month and tie it into class and what the kids can do outside of class.  For example, this month’s word is “PERSISTENCE”.  We define it, explain it, connect with it and apply it. Through the chats, the kids grasp a better understanding of what is expected out of them as students and as family members. They all get the chance to share their thoughts and ideas to the class and show what they learned that day.

I was pleasantly surprised to find out that more and more parents sit in through our classes from beginning to end, simply because they love hearing the mat chats for themselves! In addition to their children getting this valuable lesson, they also pick up a few things that help them as well as with guiding their kids with the same lessons we’ve been teaching during the mat chat.

As I float around the room and chat with the moms, dads and grandparents in the lobby, I always ask how their kids are doing at home. Simply because it matters to us. The training doesn’t stop once they leave the school, it continues long after they change out of uniform. We expect these kids to carry on the same discipline and respect that they learn on our mats and bring it with them wherever they go.

We can’t do this alone and we can’t just fix your kid. 

Bottom line is, anyone who tells you they can, is only offering you a short term solution to your long term problem.

We don’t work that way.  In fact, being a family owned and operated academy, we only know how to operate as a “family” when it comes to facing challenges.  When problems arise, we will address it and find a solution to correcting it as a team.  We’re all in this thing together. And there is no “quitting on people”.

"A burden shared is a burden halved.”

Unknown

We believe in working with the parents towards a goal for their kids.  In reality, we only have your kids for class a few days a week.  You’ve got them for the rest of your lives!  Wouldn’t you want to strengthen your ability to help them to the best of your ability, while they are still with you? Most would say, “Absolutely!” but they would still wander around lost and confused as to what to do.

"It may take a village to raise a child,

but it takes a great tribe to train warriors

to defend its children.”

IMPACT Martial Arts Academy

As a family of martial artists, we’ve created a tribal atmosphere within our school and it shows support amongst all students, teachers and guests. We can only achieve great results because we’re all on the same page.  How do we do this? It’s through syncing up with each other and communicating to each other in the direction we’re all trying to move in.

We leverage each other

to encourage action.

We advise each other

to encourage accountability.

We support each other

to encourage bravery.

Our tribe’s goal is to make every single person the best they can possibly be. The only way to achieve this is through doing this together, with the family, as part of the team.

It’s always more fun and rewarding that way too.

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3 Month Update after ACL Replacement Surgery

Got the chance to see the doctor who performed surgery on my knee back in April and he gave me some pretty good news.

Because I’ve continued to stay active while being safe and careful with my movements, he said I could return to training with light activity in a months time. Initially, they were telling me October, a whole 6 months from surgery.

So you can imagine my delight at hearing how close I am to getting back into training. (^_~) They did advise me not to push it before then.

I reassured them…that’s not gonna be an issue. I’ve been careful because I do not want to have anymore setbacks in my training.

Pros - I can walk without crutches or a cane. - No need for the leg stabilizer or a knee brace. - My limp is almost gone. - I don’t have to wait till October to train again!

Cons - I still cannot kneel on my left knee. - I’m still on meds to reduce the swelling in my knee. - I still have a month till I train again.

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Solo drills only. <3

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Breaking chains

After nearly 2 months from surgery, physical therapy and many assisted methods of moving around…I parted ways with my “robo-leg brace” this morning. When my doctor checked out the progress on the healing of my knee, he said it was still quite swollen and asked how I felt “moving around” on it. I mentioned that the pain wasn’t intense, like before, but it was more annoying due to the tightness of the swelling. Then he gave me 2 options. First, take some meds to reduce the swelling over a long period of time or second, get it drained. After going through a nasty bout of adverse reactions from the pain meds I had to be on after surgery, I’m a bit hesitant to take anything at all.  I saw this as the same situation I had gone through when I had experienced my first run in with “cauliflower ear”. So here’s what that "lovely little opportunity" looked like.

I know what you’re thinking.

"Eww, gross." Yeah, it was.

Luckily for me, there was this cooling spray he used to help numb the area.  It kind of felt like he was spraying my knee with dry ice.  It was quite cold at first, like an ice cube, but then it started to feel like really, really cold ice.  You know, like the one that will stick to your skin if you touch it? Then he used this huge syringe to drain it.  By huge, I mean like the width of the tube, you could fit like 5 sharpie markers into it.

Honestly speaking, the cooling spray hurt more than the King Kong syringe he used. I mean, yeesh! Just look at how big the needle hole was!

As I tried walking around the room without the brace on, I noticed I was still walking straight legged. I guess since I was wearing that leg brace for about 2 months and was told about a month ago to lose the crutches, I’m having a bit of phantom brace syndrome going on or something.  He said I could walk around normally, but to just take it slow for the first couple of days. After getting my knee drained, my mobility has improved, but I still feel a bit wobbly. I did not know how to feel and my reaction to his answer was pretty calm.

I was happy to know that I didn’t need the brace, but also afraid to walk without it because it has protected my knee this whole time…and on a few occasions, saved my knee from accidental bumps and trips I’ve had. When I think about it, I suppose my knee brace was kind of like a parent.

After my surgery, I was too weak to walk.  I wanted to run. But it restricted me to what I was able to do, and nothing more.  Over time, the restrictions became less and less. And today…

I get to continue on my journey without it.