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emmcarstairs · 4 hours
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I've got you under my skin
I've got you deep in the heart of me
So deep in my heart that you're really a part of me
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emmcarstairs · 11 hours
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emmcarstairs · 13 hours
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Pick a number, get a drabble
Hurt/Comfort Dialogue Prompts
"I know you're hurt."
"You're burning up."
"Just breathe."
"I don't feel good."
"Eyes on me! C'mon keep those eyes on me."
"That's a lot of blood."
"Come on, breathe, breathe, don't you dare--"
"How long were you planning on hiding this?"
"Easy, easy. You're okay, I've got you."
"I can't find a pulse!"
"Don't you dare die on me."
"Everything's okay, go back to sleep."
"can't--breathe--"
"I won't hurt you."
"Talk to me."
"Stay still."
“You don’t look so good.”
“I think I’m gonna – ”
“Tell me where you are, I’ll come get you.”
“Please stop.”
“How much sleep did you get last night?”
“It’s over now.”
“I’m okay. You don't need to worry about me.”
"You're not supposed to be up and about."
“Go to sleep. I’ll still be here when you wake up.”
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emmcarstairs · 14 hours
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Ella Purnell as Lucy MacLean Fallout (2024 - ) 1.05: The Past
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emmcarstairs · 15 hours
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VAULTGHOUL PARALLELS - 1x01 / 1x04
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emmcarstairs · 16 hours
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All I'm saying is there was a wicked gentleness in the way Cooper cut off Lucy's finger. After he used the same knife to tear a man open and eat him. After she bit his finger off. She knew he could've bitten her finger off, and eaten it, too. But, no. He was the civilized one.
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emmcarstairs · 1 day
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emmcarstairs · 1 day
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Walton Goggins as The Ghoul/Cooper Howard in Fallout (2024—) 1.02 "The Target"
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emmcarstairs · 1 day
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" Let's go Sweetheart "
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emmcarstairs · 2 days
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Let's think about Lucy from the Ghoul's POV. This girl is spewing Vault bullshit, acting all righteous. Then he sells her for parts but she comes back in one piece AND with a new finger. And all of this happens after she decapitated a man, as far as he's concerned. No wonder he offers her to brave the Wasteland together.
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emmcarstairs · 2 days
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Ella Purnell as Lucy MacLean Fallout (2024 - ) 1.06: The Trap
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emmcarstairs · 2 days
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Isn't bite also touch?
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emmcarstairs · 3 days
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There's something about the doom of all marriages we've seen so far in Fallout. Something about seeing someone's true face when it's too late. Something about different values and beliefs. And then we have two characters who see each other at their worst from the beginning. Who bite and cut, and try to prove the other wrong. And despite it all, or because of it all, they build a bond, a something, that feels more real than anything else. For once, it's coming together, not falling apart.
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emmcarstairs · 3 days
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The Heroine's Journey: Lucy MacLean
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“The feminine journey is a journey in which the hero gathers the courage to face death and endure the transformation toward being reborn as a complete being in charge of her own life.” — 45 Master Characters
In her book 45 Master Characters, Victoria Schmidt outlines the steps and phases in the Feminine Journey as seen in many traditional stories such as myths and fairy tales. Unlike The Hero’s Journey, which focuses on the external, The Heroine’s Journey is about inner exploration.
In the following analysis, I will examine Lucy MacLean’s journey so far in Fallout (2024). I believe it will be interesting to identify at what stage she is by the end of S1 which will give us an idea of what likely awaits her in S2.
Note: This analysis is written for fun. It is my own reading of the character and her journey. You’re welcome to have your own. Spoilers ahead!
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Schmidt’s Heroine’s Journey has nine stages:
ACT 1 Containment:
1. The Illusion of the Perfect World
2. The Betrayal or Realisation
3. The Awakening or Preparing for the Journey
4. The Descent – Passing the Gates of Judgement
ACT 2 Transformation:
5. The Eye of the Storm
6. Death – All Is Lost
7. Support
ACT 3 Emergence:
8. Rebirth – The Moment of Truth
9. Full Circle – The Return to the Perfect World
The Illusion of Perfect World
ACT 1
2. The Betrayal or Realization
In the first episode, we meet Lucy content in Vault 33. We are shown a whole montage of her perfect life in her perfect shelter. It’s designed to protect her. Outside is dangerous but in her bubble, she is safe and sound. But is this good enough?
Despite her obvious naivety, we get a sense she is after something else. In her first scene, she applies for marriage, which is telling of her being on the threshold of adolescence and adulthood. Now, if marriage is really what she is after, or if it is something she relies on to fit in the community she lives in, is up for debate.
The thing is, the heroine knows deep down that her little world is not perfect. And she subconsciously seeks freedom so she can exercise her growth. Perhaps the prospect of marriage is the closest to freedom she has known in the vault. Or perhaps it is the thrill of meeting someone from outside her containment. In any case, she wants change; her shelter has turned into a cage.
Here comes the moment when Lucy’s perfect world is shattered. On her wedding night, right after the consummation of marriage (the symbolic passing to adulthood), she is betrayed by her husband. This is the so-called “inciting incident”. He turns out to be a raider from the surface. Now, not only is she betrayed by him personally, but she is betrayed by her idea of the outside world. He is her first conscious contact with the world outside the vault. And it is a far cry from what she has believed in.
Not only that but the danger has breached the walls of her shelter; she can’t ignore it. It turns out that her perfect world and the system she has lived in are broken. Her attempt at freedom ends with her husband’s hands around her neck. The history and ethics lessons have done little to prepare her for this. So a part of her begins to wonder what actually lies out there.
To top it off, her father, who is an Overseer and the biggest authority by her glass bubble’s standards, is drugged and taken hostage before her own eyes. She encounters the villain for the first time in the face of Moldaver. With her convictions shattered and her dad gone, she must make a choice.
3. The Awakening, or Preparing for the Journey
Lucy’s world is in ruins, metaphorically and literally. The others’ refusal to send a search party only reinforces the idea that her world has let her down. This is her awakening. She decides to take the active road and do something about it herself, hoping to rebuild what was lost.
From the story’s perspective, she has to find her dad. But as screenwriter Robertson-Dworet puts it: “As much as she leaves to find her father in the pilot, she also wants to fuckin' know what's out that door.” Moldaver also remarks in the final episode that Lucy’s curiosity greatly motivates her to leave the vault.
Given the raiders’ attack and with no established authority to prohibit her from doing so, she ventures to do just that. With the help of Norm and Chet, she gathers tools and prepares for the journey. What she isn’t aware of but will soon find out is that no material tools will help her with what’s waiting outside. She has yet to learn to trust herself and her qualities which will ultimately help her. It’s time for the trial by fire.
4. The Descent – Passing the Gates of Judgement
ACT 2
The descent may not be a literal one. In Lucy’s case, it’s ascent. She looks behind her as the door is closed and locked. There is no way back, only ahead. Often, the descent is about passing the gates of the Underworld. One of the first shots outside the vault shows us bones and a skull on the ground. The Wasteland is very much portrayed as the Underworld with its own set of rules.
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From here on, the real journey begins. The heroine faces the consequences of her life-changing decision in the form of tests that will determine her worth. She might be advised to return to her perfect world, as Dr. Siggi Wilzig does after she lights the bonfire. After she refuses, he tells her that she will have to adapt and become a "different animal altogether," summarising the point of this stage of transformation in her journey. 
She will then try to use the tools she has at her disposal—literal and metaphorical—but they won’t work. With each encounter, she will lose weapons or belongings until she is left with nothing of the things she thought would help her. Think of the filtered water Lucy loses or how her dart doesn’t work against the Ghoul. She begins to look progressively worse as her jumpsuit gets dirtier and bloodier. She even loses her trigger finger. 
The heroine may also face societal prejudice. Lucy is stunned by people’s opinions about Vault dwellers and Vault ideals in general. She is being proven again and again that her sensibilities, HR manuals, and ethics don’t work in the Wastes. 
The heroine has to rely on her courage and instincts. She must let go of all control and surrender herself to the descent. After being stripped of everything, she must face her demons. Lucy strives to always do the right thing, but she needs to embrace the fact the fact that the right thing doesn’t always come in a neat little package. The world is more than right and wrong.
I believe the scene that best illustrates the first time Lucy actively trusts her instincts and by doing so, survives on her own, is Super Duper Mart. She uses threats, uses a makeshift weapon, holds a hostage (it’s a robot but still, it’s a big step for her), and most significantly, for the first time, murders another to ensure her own survival. Even though Martha had no humanity left, her murder is important in Lucy’s journey because her death becomes synonymous with doing the right thing, not for a cause or the greater good, but for Lucy herself. 
5. The Eye of the Storm
She emerges victorious with her bloodied face and tank top, and this is the most disheveled state in which we have seen her. By helping out the Ghoul, she is the victor not only in terms of survival but also in terms of morality. She shows him that she is morally superior to him. She’s successfully beaten her demons this time without losing sight of her golden rule. 
Still, it has taken a lot out of her to survive. The heroine feels weary, reminiscing about easier times. She seeks to find the familiar comfort she once had and may consequently settle for something she doesn’t really want. 
After this mini-climax, the heroine evaluates and comes to terms with what just happened. She concludes that she handled things well. Having survived the danger, she gains a false sense of security. In Lucy’s journey, this stage coincides with her meeting Max and their experience in Vault 4. 
Finally, Lucy finds a person she can trust. The world feels a tad bit better with someone by her side. At the same time, she dreams of going back to her own perfect little world. It’s so lucky that they end up in another vault!
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While Max discovers the joys of living a simple life, it’s interesting to observe Lucy’s behavior. Although she feels safe for a moment, she starts noticing the people and things around her. She’s become more perceptive than before. Try as she might, she can’t go back to her old ways due to her experience on the surface. She wants to feel safe, she wants to sleep with Max; she wants life to be simple again. But she can’t help but look twice over her shoulder. She feels uneasy and grows suspicious of everything around her. It’s the newly found survivor in her screaming at her to get out. 
Eventually, Lucy learns that she has made the wrong assumptions about Vault 4 because of her ignorance and her raw instincts. They leave the vault unscathed, with Lucy fantasizing about a future with her and Max living together back in her perfect world. Soon they find the head but are forced to separate. Lucy gets the head, the kiss, and the promise that Max will find her in Vault 33. It looks like the journey is nearing its end. But it’s only the beginning. 
6. Death – All Is Lost
The heroine believes that her journey will soon be over, but it is time for her to face her biggest fear yet. Lucy delivers the head and finds her dad, thinking they can safely go back to how things were. Then, all of a sudden, her world is spun on its axis once more. 
Schmidt notes that few female protagonists make it past the stage of their “death”. Some of them die in the literal sense, some go back to their old lives defeated, and others fall into a spiral of depression. I believe this is Lucy’s final stage in S1. What will become of her in S2? Let’s speculate!
She learns about her mother’s fate and about what her father did to Shady Sands. And perhaps most jarring to her is that her father really believes that he’s done the right thing by dropping a bomb over a thriving city. Lucy’s role model turns out to be a fraud. The ideals she has lived and fought for, too. And it’s Moldaver, the villain, who seems to be on the right side of the story, despite her murdering her fellow people. It looks like the world isn’t simply divided into right and wrong after all.
This is the ultimate betrayal that leaves the heroine’s thoughts in inner turmoil. She feels humiliated and confused. All this time, she’s lived in a perfectly constructed lie. The events build up to her mercy killing her own mother, which is exactly what the Ghoul did to Roger in front of her. Purnell says: "She's learned from him. She has turned into him." She faces the death of her old self.
7. Support
ACT 3 Emergence:
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The heroine’s journey is about building bridges between the individual and the group. Her inner awakening leads to her being more open to the help of others and helping them in turn. She isn’t afraid of betrayal anymore because, at the end of the day, she has herself.
In Lucy’s final scenes in S1, we actually see the beginning of this stage with the Ghoul offering her to travel with him and find out more about the past. She leaves Max behind and goes with the Ghoul. According to Schmidt, it’s during this stage that the protagonist will accept herself as she is and go on to share her knowledge with others. She will define her own world without an external authority. Her journey of self-discovery will guide the others around her to make amends with their own problems. 
We have already seen the Ghoul’s influence on Lucy. In S2, I believe we’ll see how Lucy affects the Ghoul for the better by balancing his sharp edges. But before that, she will need his help to get herself up on her feet so that she can be reborn and come full circle in a new perfect world.
Thanks for reading and I'd love to hear your thoughts!
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emmcarstairs · 3 days
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By killing her mum in a mercy kill, she's doing exactly what the Ghoul did to Roger. She's learnt from him. She has turned into him. When she said, "I'll never be you," maybe that's not true. And in that moment, when she shoots her mum, it means so many things. It means 'I'm coming with you.' It means. 'I f*cking hate you, but I have turned into you, you were right.' It means she's letting go of her golden centre. I want the audience at the end of the show to wonder if their hero is still a good person. I don't know who she's gonna be in season two, but this is what happens when you break the unbreakable. I don't know who she's about to become. [...] I'd be down to play it either way. - Ella Purnell (x)
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emmcarstairs · 3 days
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Sweetheart & The Ghoul in FALLOUT, S.1 Ep.02 "The Target"
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emmcarstairs · 3 days
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no consuming this media isnt enough i need to go on a walk and think about it to music
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