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Thanks google ai that’s….,. Really helpful

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Choose

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This would fix me I think

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everyone is dave

4 gms one player. Like doing an interview for a job.

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dms get no respect

Red Flags In A DM

Their copy of the Dungeon Master's Guide is blatantly a copy of Guide To American Birdspotting with a crude drawing of an orc over the red-bellied finch

Instead of "Yes, anding" your suggestions, they "No, get out of my housing" them.

They insist they have a "secret missive from wizards of the coast" with the "real rules of D&D" that you can't see but oddly always aligns with their plot.

The above, even when you're not playing D&D

Their minis are clearly just random animals they've put on the game map. One's a deer.

You give your action, and they just stare, unblinking, faintly smiling. They don't respond to anything you say.

You abruptly realize you've never seen this person before

When you turn to ask other members of the game group what's going on, the room is empty.

On social media you find no trace of your game group. None of your friends remember ever meeting anyone of that description.

However, investigation finds their names and descriptions match the victims of an unsolved murder from 30 years ago.

You find photos of the victims, and it's them. Oh god, it's definitely them.

The murder took place during a D&D session

The GM was never found, but there's a photo.

You recognize them. Of course you recognize them.

As you realize this, you turn to run, but your GM is behind you. You didn't hear them enter. You're not sure how they did.

They still don't speak, but their smile is broader

You try to run, but you find you're frozen. The GM takes something out their bag.

It's their terrible homebrew with a bunch of awful rules that's completely focused around their self-insert mary sue DMNPC and they refuse to play anything else for the rest of the campaign.

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let him cook

there’s no rule saying an opossum can’t play sports bud

the transition im crying

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pretty sure there is this it’s called Sanctuary

lvl 1 abjuration spell

bonus action

30ft range

target creature within range

components V S M (small silver mirror)

duration 1 minute

classes: cleric

only reason monks/rogues don’t get this easy is because it would be broken in 5e

If there is antimagic zones there should also be the martial equivalent of it. Zone of drop your weapons or something

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he knows what he did. fishermans prison for you lil brudder

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great idea. taking notes. gonna destroy the ERP monsters

Succubus who lures you to evil through holding hands.

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ooh i hope it’s meeeeeeeeee 👁️🫦👁️

What if a little goblin or yokai or other mischief making spirit but this one's whole thing was sneaking onto your Tumblr and publishing the absolute worst drafts you ever saved and forgot about

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note to others : i am DEFINITELY not a live youngling herring. i have NOT been PICKLED for your enjoyment (*wonk*) and am in no way wanting to be thrown in that ol’ briar patch you call a stomach

bawh gawd off the top of the steel cage a canner with the canning kit out of nowhere 16ft down through the announcers table

oh shiiiiiiiiiiiiii

what else does this fish suggest

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try that dutch nonsense swap out the tomato sauce for whole egg mayo (alla best foods/hellmans) when eating chips while your at it

but please don’t realise how good pickled herring is sorry that gotta stay dutch. i’ll share the salted liquorice and the ammonium candy but not my precious herring

what else does this fish suggest

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even harder when you only know DBZ from pop culture osmosis i just thought every question was a trick question.

—— ran out of tag space didn’t know that could happen. maybe will just reblog into perpetuity but now fuck i’ve done fucked it up

seriously when are they gonna fuck up the IP of the bartimaeus trilogy i trust no one. please let del Toro make it and it actually be good. please. i beg you. also let him finally make in the mountains of madness as a treat. he’s been so good! such a good little director lately.

i will figure out how to contain basically uhhh “blog” posting to my own channels soon sorry y’all

Hey everyone! I made a "fun" "game" to torture my friends with! Which is weird because surely everyone knows what Goku looks like? Should be pretty simple?

Reviews:

"got i think one question in and went Ah fuck. SHIT"

"what do you mean one of them is actually called gohanks i thought that was a joke"

"THIS IS NOT OKAY"

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ever since i felt the blursed power of Ding Dong the Witch is Dead

i guess my mind started cataloguing songs to play when other "celebrities" die my playlist is over 35 tracks long and nobody has died yet YET

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Cruddy? Thems beautifuiele 🫠💋🫠

Some cruddy little problem sleuth doodlessss

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my beautiful baby boys. They have so much vic, imagination and the other one.

I love them equally

But especially that PI.

He’s got that ogle 👁️🫦👁️

my three sons. piss poo and excrement