estinoire - Tumblr blog

[estinoire]

I was 177 lbs then I weigh 148 now I struggled and failed more times than I can count but I kept going and I'm doing it

[estinoire]

Milk Shot by @sethnocentric Instagram.com/sethnocentric Model: Nyakim

[estinoire]

[estinoire]

I haven’t posted here in years, but I think I’m going to start again because I want this year to be year of growth and having a place to sort through my thoughts, vent, and reflect will be good for me. With that said, please reach out if you’re still active on here! I need some people to follow.

[estinoire]

[estinoire]

[estinoire]

[estinoire]

[estinoire]

https://www.instagram.com/p/BMrrCuzA4j7/

[estinoire]

Julia @humphreyandgrace.

[estinoire]

⭐️🌙💫 Moonchild Dress in Black Flower from Motel Rocks http://bit.ly/28KGDnR 📸 @ddylanthomass

[estinoire]

[estinoire]

On Thursday, the guy who has been a HUGE part of my life for the last year and a half asked me to remove all my belongings from his house and told me that he couldn't have me in his life anymore (unless I decided I wanted to be in a relationship with him). It's only been 3 full days but it feels strange. It's hard to adjust from seeing or at least talking to someone every single day to not communicating with them at all. I can't count how many times I've thought to text, snap, or call him only to realize that I can't But I keep reminding myself that this is the best thing for him (and I) right now and I really hope this will allow him to heal.

[estinoire]

[estinoire]

[estinoire]

• I have 5 more work days until I am (basically) DONE with this job and it's so close that I cannot even process my excitement anymore. The only unsettling thing is that I haven't been given the "go ahead" to tell the kids that I'm leaving yet. On Tuesday I was told "maybe at the end of this week". Is 2-3 days notice really enough time? Ugh... but I can't completely check out yet because I still have so much planning to do before the new person takes over! • I've been on two official dates with the new guy (who's 20 years older than I am and has a 13 year old daughter). Date #1 was appetizers and drinks. Date #2 was dinner, bowling, and a movie. I still don't know about all this, so I'm just taking it one day at a time, but I'm thanking the lord that he hasn't tried to kiss me yet. It's been a year and a half since I last went on any dates that involved a kiss and it already feels like a foreign concept to me. How do I deal?? • My parents came up to visit this last weekend and, after asking my mom if a particular dress would be good for my brother's grad, my mom said "Yes, it's very good but are you sure you still fit into it? You look like you've gained weight. You need to go to the gym every day before your brother's grad." Since then, I've been feeling like a big blob with thoughts of juice fasting floating around in my head tbh. My mom probably meant well, but you can't say stuff like that (to me). • The I'm-so-fat feeling followed me around while I went dress shopping yesterday and nothing was looking good at all but Zara pulled through for me and now I have 2 hella cute dresses to add to my closet • The murder mystery/birthday party is on Saturday and I'm excited. It's a fairytale theme/storyline and my character is the black queen. My tiara arrives in the mail tomorrow 😊

[estinoire]