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evil-overlord-scriptology · 5 years ago

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But I Don’t Want to be a Sensei! Pt. 6 (ARCHIVED)

Chapters 18 & 19

Chapter 18: Prank Wars, Revenge of the Siblings!

vvv 3rd POV~ Sasuke vvv

A girly shriek resounded all throughout the Compound, followed by Obito yelling for Yanagi. On Itachi's other side, Shisui barked a laugh, “How much you want to bet Yagi-chan shoved a beetle down Obito-senpai's shirt again?” Sasuke gave his brother's best friend an annoyed look. It had been one of the few times that Itachi was willing to spend time with him, and Shisui came and ruined it!

Itachi-nii had told him once that Shisui used to be close to Yanagi and Obito. It bothered Sasuke even more not knowing why his cousins and Shisui drifted apart. He suspected it had something to do with Yanagi-sensei. Both Shisui and Obito-itoko weren't the kind of people to drop a friend, but Yanagi definitely was.

Itachi shrugged at his best friend's question, “It's that or chili pepper again.” Naruto had told Sasuke about that one. Somehow Naruto had ended up at Yanagi's house for dinner yesterday and she had dumped an entire container of chili powder in Obito's food as the first prank of the war. The next day Obito approached Sasuke and Naruto with a proposition for helping him in a prank, which they agreed to, stupidly.

Had Itachi-nii not intervened, Sasuke hadn't a doubt that Yanagi might actually have broken his arm the way she flung him around. Though she earned a harsh reprimand from the Hokage and Sasuke's father, Yanagi was back the next day throwing a bee hive at Obito's face.

It went on from there for the next several days. Pranks ranged from exploding flour bombs, which irritated Aunt Uruchi to no end since they had stolen her best flour, to elaborate pranks involving squirrels, super glue, and a healthy amount of some type of itching salve flinched from Obito's female teammate. There was even a rumor flying around that Yanagi had bodily thrown an Academy student at her brother.

Prank Wars between Yanagi and Obito were a serious business as well as an entertaining one. Someone, Sasuke suspected one of Obito's friends, had started a betting pool on who would win this war. Had Kaa-chan not explicitly told her sons to not bet a single yen, or else, Sasuke would have placed his money on Yanagi-sensei.

He already knew how ruthless his sensei could be.

vvv Normal POV vvv

Obito: 28 Yanagi: 27

“Would you be quiet?!” I hissed to the two quarreling genin behind me as Obito came into view. Naruto and Sasuke blanched and finally shut their traps, they had already learned earlier this week that I was very irritable and quite violent if my pranks messed up because they couldn't shut their damn mouths.

Obito-nii passed Checkpoint One and didn't notice a thing. Giggling under my breath, my fingers slowly tightened on the ninja wire I held. the feel of it's sharp metal biting into the pads of my fingers was wonderful and made me almost giddy with the near accomplishment of my newest prank.

...Checkpoint Two…

...Three…

The thin beige covering on the pothole I had Naruto prepare last night gave under Nii-san's foot. I saw my brother pause and look down confused when seemingly solid ground collapsed. “Now!” I roared and yanked on the ninja wire, releasing the chakra-reinforced bamboo cage that Kakashi-nii had prepared for me.

Obito yelped when the cage landed, it's sharpened poles digging into the ground so it would be hard to get out. I knew it wouldn't hold him long, my brother was called the Uchiha Phantom for a reason, but it would hold long enough for the prank.

The one eyed Uchiha snapped around to glare at me when I stood up in triumph. “You think this can hold me?” He growled. Oh Kami, it was like Nii-san had jumped out of some cheesy festival play that Mikoto-oba was addicted to. I still remember being subjected to those horrors all throughout my childhood. Obito, Itachi and I all avoided festivals with a passion because of those dreaded plays Mikoto-oba dragged us to every year when we were young.

Sasuke, the lucky bastard, never had to face the horror of cheesy plots and drama.

I decided to play along with it, “May you rot in eternity, Nii-san, for your crimes against the public!” I said with flair and a poker face that made the ANBU masks full of expression.

Obito's flat 'you are so dead to me' look was beyond priceless.

Kakashi-nii landed beside me before I could disturb my poor brother even further, “We have a schedule, Yanagi, stick to it.” The masked jounin reminded me.

I waved a hand, “Alright alright.” I grumbled then raised my voice, “First wave! Forward!”

Out of no where, known victims of Obito's past pranks appeared, holding balloons filled with paint, glue, water, and oil. Kakashi and I grinned at the now terrified Obito; well I think Kakashi-nii grinned, it was hard to tell with that mask of his. This was what Nii-san got for tripping me, and Kakashi who had been walking beside me, into the Naka river yesterday. It had been an accident, but Obito made the foolish choice to claim it was a prank to break the tie we had been in for the past four days. In retaliation, Kakashi changed loyalties and together we planned the Ultimate (Flowering Lotus) Prank to End All (Youthful) Pranks as Gai had put it.

Kakashi-nii was ever so helpful to grab me and shunshin the both of us to a rooftop out of firing range. “Fire!” I screamed and as one, colorful balloons soared towards the poor little bamboo cage and the well deserving victim trapped inside. I watched gleefully as my brother slowly turning into a multicolored, gooey blob.

“Second wave! Approach!” I called out once the first wave was out of ammunition. This time it was Obito's friends, and their students, who showed up, sporting large bags made of burlap. These were filled with sand, glitter, flour, and chicken feathers. Genma joined Kakashi and I on the roof, a clipboard in hand, as Kakashi waved the second wave to start their attack. Obito's growling threats of recompense was music to my ears; sadly I had to ignore it in favor of Genma.

Several years ago, when the first Prank War started, Genma asked for neutrality from all our pranks in return that he be the Record Keeper; that way there was no dispute on who won the war. Over the years Genma's job slowly evolved into not only keeping up with the record, but also judging the pranks and awarding points based on creativity, ruthlessness, and complexity. He also kept up with the loyalties of Kakashi– which changed often enough that even Kakashi couldn't keep up with it– the irritability of superiors, namely Fugaku and the Hokage, and controlled the betting pool that always cropped up when Prank Wars started.

The senbon wielder looked at the scene below us, then at the two of us. “Kakashi is on your side now?” Genma asked. I let Kakashi answer that one and watched him with my sharingan activated. During the fifth Prank War, Kakashi had played the dirty double agent to sabotage my pranks. Since then I never really trusted him again, at least when it came to pranks. Luckily for Kakashi, I could tell he wasn't lying, otherwise he would join Nii-san in the cage and become target practice for genin.

Genma studied the scene below him with the intensity of a building inspector, “Hm… I'll give you three points, the ruthlessness of the prank is somewhat lacking. As is the creativity, I've seen you do better than that Yanagi-chan. But I have to give you credit for the complexity.” Genma eyed me, “What did you do to get everyone to go along with this?”

I smirked, “Secret.” I quipped. I would never give out my pranking methods any more than I would give away blackmail unless I got something out of it.

There was a small beep and Genma and I turned around to see Kakashi looking at a timer. He turned his single eye on me, “Time's up.”

“For what?”

Instead of answering, the sneaky little bastard gave me his famous eye smile and jumped into the fray to release Obito. There was a stillness on the battlefield and my brother slowly climbed out of the cage, wiping off large globs of stickiness and flinging it at anyone close by. Then Obito slowly turned to glare at me. His single eye was glowing red with the sharingan.

Shit.

“Damn you, Kakashiiiii!” I shrieked as I hightailed it out of there. Nii-san was close on my heels and hands outstretched and fingers hooked, ready to catch me or strangle me I didn't care to find out.

vvv

Obito: 49 Yanagi: 52

I yawned as the Hokage went on and on about representing the shinobi population to the citizens of Konoha and how it was our duty to uphold and respect the citizenry of the village we protected… or something like that. I was just happy that the prank went as well as it did. There had been a fifty percent chance that the prank could have ended worse than it did. Honestly, what I had predicted as the best outcome turned out to be far worse than what actually happened.

Wasn't my fault that the oldest restaurant in the village, which was said to have been built by the Shodaime himself with the first Mokuton houses when Konoha was founded, went up in flames.

I got good points from Genma for the impromptu firework show though.

“…silly feud will stop now! I've indulged you long enough, but now that you are endangering the lives of this village it will stop, do you understand me?” The Hokage ranted as he paced back and forth in front of my brother and I.

“Yes sir!” Obito responded immediately, his single eye forward and hardened with formality. Hiruzen-sama was the person whom Obito respected the most, after the Yondaime. Like Naruto, Obito seemed to think of the old man as a grandfather figure. However unlike Naruto, Nii-san knew that Hiruzen would first and foremost be our Hokage before he was a grandfather type and treated the old man with a little more respect than my blonde student.

“…Yes sir.” I answered a beat after Obito, slightly rebellious and with very little respect. Mostly because I now owed money to Anko in a personal bet of who would end the War: Fugaku or the Hokage. The one time I was expecting the Uchiha clan leader to end something, and the old codger didn't even lift a damn finger.

I hate my uncle.

vvv

“Okay, two D-rank missions today.” I said as way of greeting once all three of my brats showed up. After the Hokage had chewed Obito and I out yesterday for the pranks, he practically threw the two missions at me, saying that they were special requests for Team 7.

Not only did Naruto groan, but so did Sasuke. “D-rank? We completed an A-rank mission, shouldn't we get better missions now?” I was mildly surprised that it was Sasuke who complained. But then, he was a cocky little shit and probably thought that since we survived an A-rank mission, we didn't need puny D-ranks anymore.

I pegged Sasuke with one of the scrolls, “Stop complaining! Team 7 was extremely lucky to survive that mission and neither the Hokage or I are willing to put untested genin back into that situation so soon.” I didn't tell them that, because of the Wave mission, every C-rank mission was closed to all genin teams until they were verified on their true mission rank. Fifteen missions had already been changed to a higher standard and the clients fined huge sums because of their dishonesty.

Sasuke glared at me as he rubbed the side of his head where the scroll had hit him, but he said nothing. Naruto, however, wasn't so keen on keeping his mouth shut, “Yeah, but if they give us a proper C-rank then we shouldn't have a problem, right?!”

Boy was his logic flawed.

My last scroll hit home, right down Naruto's face. There was a second of stillness as his body teetered for balance, before the blonde idiot toppled over. Not a moment later, Dumbass sat up with a very amusing red mark dividing his face in half, “Hey!”

I gave him a distasteful look, “Team 7 is cursed with bad luck. Whatever C-rank we get is bound to go wrong. Hell, you can't even complete half of the D-ranks without messing something up.”

“Doesn't mean you can throw things at your students!”

“It's practice.”

“For who?!”

“For you to dodge. That could have been an enemy kunai and you would be dead, congratulations. Now give me the scroll back. You too, Duckass.” I countered dryly. Both came flying end of end towards me at a rabid pace, Sasuke's a smidgen faster than Naruto's scroll. I grabbed Sasuke's out of the air before it could strike me in the chest and let Naruto's fly over my shoulder to hit a random tree behind me. “Work on your aim too, Dumbass.” I commented as I walked to retrieve the scroll he had thrown.

Hinata seemed to be tired of our antics when I returned to stand in front of them, “Y-you said we have t-two missions, S-sensei?” She prompted.

Mentally I ticked off a check mark. Getting Hinata to initiate a conversation: Done!

“Yes, and we're in luck!” My sarcasm was almost tangible, “The Hokage gave us two special request missions.” Special request missions rarely involved D-ranks, and they were normally babysitting missions for teams that had a special handle for kids. I knew for damn sure that whatever the missions were, they couldn't be a babysitting mission. No sane parent would trust the Kyuubi brat to babysit their spawn, let alone two anti-social Uchiha. While it might be bragging rights to say that the Hyuuga heiress had babysat your unholy imp it wasn't worth it to have the two walking disasters and their violent sensei under the same roof.

Sasuke scrunched his nose up in displeasure, “If it's the Capture Tora mission again...” At that all three of my genin shuddered while I laughed. There was nothing quite amusing as seeing an Uchiha scared of a cat. In fact, as far as I knew only Itachi had never been afraid of Tora. Even I had been when I was still a genin.

“No, but there will be cats on a mission. Nekobaa wants us to-”

Naruto cut me off, “No. Way! I'm not going to clean that weird lady's house again!”

“…Wants us to-”

“Not doing it! Go tell the Hokage that I refuse to go there again!”

“Dumbass, if you interrupt me again, I'll personally lock you in a room with Nekomata-sama and say you are a dog lover!” I snapped impatiently. Only Sasuke really got the levity of my threat, but Hinata at least got an inkling of what it entailed when she saw Sasuke staring at me in horror.

Naruto just shrugged, “Eh, so what? It's not like this Nekomata guy can do anything to me.”

“Lord Nekomata happens to be the Boss summon of the Uchiha clan. And do you know what summon the Uchiha clan uses?” I didn't wait for any of them to try and answer, “Cats.”

Now Naruto was understanding what exactly I was getting at. He gulped and laughed nervously, trying to play my threat off as a joke. I simply stared at him through narrowed eyes until he finally shut up.

“Now, as I was saying. Nekobaa wants us to come pick up the newest order and transport it to the Clan Compound. We'll be going to Sora-ku to Nekobaa's shop tomorrow and will be gone all day. That means that you have the rest of today to complete your other mission.” I tossed the other scroll at Hinata, who scrambled to catch it.

“Wait, what about you?” Sasuke asked me.

I waved a dismissive hand, “I've got other things to do. By the way, if you screw this mission up, I'm signing all of you up for a very special training regimen.” I smiled in such a way that Team 7 knew whatever 'special training' I had in mind would be torture for them.

After tossing training ideas around with Asuma and Kurenai, I learned that the best motivator to get the job done right was to threaten my brats with Gai.

It's how Asuma got his lazyass genius to do things.

Mock saluting my trio of brats I disappeared with a puff of smoke as I shunshined the hell out of there. Rin had announced that she would pay for any jounin kunoichi who showed up at one of the local hot springs. The fun part was she didn't tell us which one, only that if we didn't arrive by noon then she wouldn't pay for us.

Sometimes Nii-san influenced Rin too much, but I was fine with that.

vvv 3rd POV vvv

Team 7 all sighed when Yanagi-sensei disappeared. Sometimes it felt like she was only babysitting them and not actually trying to teach them to be true ninjas. In fact the only time she even bothered to teach the genin something, it was during the Wave mission. For the weeks afterwards, Yanagi was too busy with her pranks to even bother paying attention to her students and her negligence was starting to show.

“D-rank M-mission,” Hinata read off the scroll Yanagi-sensei had given her, “B-babysitting.” At that Naruto groaned. Hinata gave her crush a side glance, blushing, before continuing, “B-babysitting H-h-ho-hokage-sama's g-grand-s-son, K-Konohamaru.”

Naruto stopped his dramatics and perked up, “Konohamaru? Really? Yes!” He cheered. This was a mission he could stand! Nothing like getting to hang out with his kohai and getting paid for it!

Sasuke bit back a sigh. He could already tell that this was going to be a disaster.

vvv

“Hey! Hey boss! I'm appointing you the leader of the Konohamaru Corps! And your first mission is to find the red four-leaf clover!” Konohamaru shouted the second he saw Naruto.

Naruto blinked at him for a moment, then exchanged a confused glance with Sasuke, who only shrugged and stuffed his hands in his pockets. Sasuke did not pretend to understand younger kids. Most Uchiha children were treated more like adults than kids, and as a result they often had a more mature mentality than the rest of their age mates.

“What's this Konohamaru Corp?” Naruto finally asked, feeling like it was the safest question he could ask his little kohai. Even Naruto understood that there were somethings you were better off not knowing, especially when it came to Konohamaru.

The kid puffed out his chest and planted his fists on his hips, “It's a newly established renovation corps of Konohagakure!”

Naruto seemed to like that answer, he grinned hugely, “Oh? And how many members do we have so far?”

The scarf-wearing little boy touched his index finger to his chin as he pretended to think, then pointed up at Naruto, “Well there's you, the leader, and me, the lieutenant general...”

Naruto posed, “And and?”

“And that's it for now!” Konohamaru ended joyously. Naruto deflated like a balloon.

“What?! You should have told me it was just a game, dattebayo!” The blonde shouted.

Konohamaru continued as if he hadn't heard his senpai. Instead he was staring at the rest of Team 7 standing awkwardly in the doorway, “I guess they could join too.”

Naruto squinted at the two genin standing behind him, “Ne ne, I don't mind Hinata-chan, but Sasuke-teme can't be in the Konohamaru Corps!”

Sasuke scoffed, “Like I want to… loser.”

Konohamaru interrupted before a fight could break out, “Now, as I said we have a very important and dangerous mission! We must find the red four-leaf clover!”

“K-Konohamaru-kun… we c-can't do d-dan-dangerous missions. W-we have to baby-babysit you.” Hinata interjected but Konohamaru waved her off.

“Don't worry! There isn't anything that can defeat Naruto-nii-san! We'll be fine!” If Sasuke was a laughing person, he would have lost it just then. Naruto? Unbeatable? Maybe against a fly, but then again maybe not.

Before Naruto could puff up at the lies, Sasuke did a very 'Yanagi-like' thing and bopped him upside the head. “We're supposed to babysit you, Konohamaru, not go off on a wild goose chase for some dumb plant.”

The young Uchiha regretted it instantly when Konohamaru turned large watery puppy eyes on him, “Please, you don't understand!” Konohamaru bowed his head and looked at his hands, “There's this girl in the Academy. Her name is Yoshino Kaede and she's very cute...”

“So what's the problem?” Sasuke asked rudely. He couldn't stand little idiots with their ridiculous crushes, be they boy or girl.

Konohamaru sniffled, “She's leaving tomorrow...” He said dejectedly. “That's why I wanna get the red four-leaf clover. Because Kaede's friends said that if she got it, her wish to stay can come true and she can stay in the village.”

“Alright then!” Hinata and Konohamaru jumped at the sudden outburst from Naruto, “Well go get that red clover and you can give it to the girl you love!”

At that Konohamaru went completely red. He never said he loved Kaede-chan, just that he thought she was cute! With her teal colored hair and eyes and kind smile… a lot of the boys in the Academy thought she was the cutest girl in their class! And the nicest. And the smartest. And the one who brought the best sweets because her mother was a fantastic cook!

“Hold on! We're here to babysit him, not to go off on a stupid quest. Do you even know where this clover is?” Sasuke protested, trying to be the voice of reason. Unfortunately, Naruto was already sold to Konohamaru's plea and Hinata wouldn't take sides because she wasn't one to raise unnecessary conflict.

“In Akagahara…”

Sasuke deadpanned at the ten year old. “Akagahara? Really? You're going to risk your life for some stupid clover for a girl you'll never see again?”

Naruto gave his teammate the stink eye, “You know you're really starting to sound like Frizzy-sensei...” He commented before giving his best grin to the downtrodden Konohamaru, “Don't worry about the bastard, we'll get your clover, dattebayo! Teme can stay here if he's such a wuss.”

A shiver ran up Sasuke's spine. He was not a wuss! He just didn't want Yanagi-itoko after his head for not stopping the Honorable Grandson from being killed!

“Besides,” Naruto continued, “Konohamaru will go after the clover whether we do something or not, so isn't better if we go along and make sure he doesn't get hurt? To babysit Konohamaru, we have to be with him right?” Since when did Naruto become so manipulative?

Sasuke swore the dead last was hanging around Yanagi too much if he was starting to act like her. The young Uchiha opened his mouth, ready to protest the stupidity of their plan, when Hinata suddenly spoke, “N-Naruto-kun is right, S-S-Sasuke-san.”

Now Sasuke knew he had lost the battle. He threw up his hands and glowered at the wall, “Fine. But I'm blaming Naruto when Yanagi comes after us.” Naruto and Konohamaru waved away his threat, not even caring. They had gotten the sourpuss to agree to go! And that was all that mattered.

vvv

“Man… patrol here is always so boring. It's not like someone is ever going to get in...” Denryoku remarked as he thumped his sore shoulder with a fist. That new captain of theirs was a true slave driver. Not even Yanagi-taichō had been so brutal when it came to training, though she hadn't put Squad 18 through training since Ibo first joined it.

Ibo said nothing as he continued scanning the road for anyone coming close to the entrance into Akagahara. Denryoku felt sorry for his silent friend. Ibo probably was having the worst time adjusting to the new captain. Hyuuga Tokuma didn't treat Denryoku and Ibo like unique individuals the way Yanagi had, he treated them like soldiers that had no personality and he expected them to do whatever he asked. Yanagi had been Ibo's first captain, Squad 18 was the white haired Uchiha's first assignment and he had it extremely easy with the hot-tempered but understanding spitfire. Now poor Ibo was having to deal with an uptight Hyuuga who didn't take into consideration that Ibo avoided talking at all costs.

In Denryoku's opinion, Tokuma was more uptight than Fugaku-sama. Which was saying a lot.

Denryoku bumped his shoulder against his best friend's, “Hey, remember that time when Yanagi clobbered Shisui-san with the Spring/Summer Criminal Records Book of 37 A.K.E.?” The dark haired flirt chuckled at the memory. Oh it had been frightening at the time, because if was one of the rare instances that Shisui had actually lost his temper, but now all the Uchiha officers thought back on the incident with amusement.

Ibo huffed a little and signed with a single hand, 'Stop trying to cheer me up.'

The other Uchiha pretended to be offended, “Me? Cheer you up?! Why would I do such a thing?”

This time, Ibo finally gave his quiet laugh. Denryoku could never understand how Ibo did everything so quietly. He was almost like a ghost sometimes, especially with that ashen hair of his. If Obito-san didn't already have the nickname as 'Phantom Uchiha', Denryoku was sure that Ibo would have been tagged with it. As it was, many of the officers called Ibo the 'Wraith' behind the young man's back. Even Yanagi often called Ibo 'Silent Spook' to his face, but then Yanagi had an awful habit of assigning demeaning nicknames to everyone.

Everyone blamed Obito for his sister's rude habit.

They also blamed him for her blackmail collection.

And her general surliness.

Really, it was always Obito's fault when it came to something Yanagi did.

“Anything to report?” Tokuma asked as he suddenly popped up out of no where. Denryoku silently cursed his captain's 'pop goes the weasel' trick.

“Nope. All clear, as it always is.” Denryoku responded, his voice a little cutting. He had been in service for eight years, and had had three captains not including the Hyuuga, but this stuck up prick treated him as if he were the newbie. Even Ibo, who was only on his fourth year and only had Yanagi as his captain, was still more of a veteran than the Hyuuga.

Tokuma's captaincy had practically been handed to him on a silver platter. The Hyuuga was on record for having the quickest promotion in history of the Konoha MP, and that wasn't a good thing. He had been an officer for a year before Fugaku handed him a promotion in response to the accusations of Uchiha promoting only their own. Which was a load of bullshit. Code of Conduct clearly states that an officer must have at least five years before being considered for a captain promotion. Konoha MP hadn't even allowed non-Uchiha to join for four years before people started complaining about the 'lack' of non-Uchiha captains.

And Fugaku handed the first non-Uchiha promotion to a wet-behind-the-ears Hyuuga because 'it brought the two powerhouse clans closer together'. What a load of bull.

The captain narrowed his pearly white eyes at Denryoku. For three weeks he had tried to win over the two Uchiha, but they were dead set on comparing him to their last captain, who had quite the reputation at headquarters. Ibo hadn't been as bad as his teammate, less expressive definitely, but Tokuma could still feel cold enmity from the silent Uchiha. Now he didn't care and just treated the two stubborn men like he would anyone else who treated him with hostility.

“Did you check the south end?” Tokuma prompted further.

The dark haired Uchiha rolled his eyes, “Yes. And Ibo kept watch on the road. We know how to patrol, you kn-” Whatever Denryoku was about to say was cut off when a dull explosion caused the fence of Akagahara to rattle. All three police officers whirled around to stare at the plume of smoke raising from inside the fence perimeter. All traps within the restricted area were motion-sensitive and there was no wildlife stupid enough to scratch out a living in a booby-trap invested forest. That only meant that someone had somehow gotten in and were now causing a ruckus.

Great.

Chapter 19: A Little Tough Love

“Fifty more laps.” I grouched when Hinata finally finished the third set of the day. Naruto took off like someone had just told him that there was a free all you can eat ramen buffet in Kumo, with his Uzumaki lineage and the Kyuubi reserves the boy wasn't even sweating. Sasuke gave me the darkest glare he could muster as he stumbled into a run behind the blonde, still going at a relatively good pace, but Hinata was barely walking.

Rolling my eyes I grabbed the hood of the Hyuuga's jacket and pulled her back. “You meditate.” I told her and tried to make Hinata sit down, but she only shook off my hold.

“N-no… I can… do-do i-i-i-it.” She said between whooping breaths. I narrowed my eyes at her. I wasn't used to this new Hinata, this was the second time she defied me. But I wasn't going to stop her, anything was better than the stuttering mess I had started with.

“Fine, but I'm not saving your ass when you faint.”

Hinata took off without another word, she was only going as a shuffling jog, but she was still trying and that had to count for something I guess. I turned to my next task and glared hotly at the Honorable Grandson, who cowered in my shadow. “P-please don't kill me...” He stuttered.

I rolled my eyes, like I would kill the Honorable Grandson of the Hokage.

Too much of a hassle to hide from the authorities.

“You, pest, are going to write a formal apology to the Konoha Police Patrol that found you and my team then write a report to the Hokage detailing what happened. And don't think about doing anything stupid, I'll read over everything before you hand the report to your grandfather personally.” To prove my point, I handed him two sheets of paper and a pen, “You only get one chance for each, otherwise you join my Team in their exercises for the rest of the week.”

Konohamaru seemed confused by that, “B-but...” He started.

“But what?”

“Bu-but Naruto-nii-san said that you couldn't do anything if we were caught. My grandfather will hear of this! Then you'll be sorry!” Apparently this brat wanted to die.

I leaned down until my face was inches from his own, “If you're stupid enough to believe that dumbass then you're more gullible than a sack of worms. And about as ugly and useless too. I don't give a damn if you're the Honorable Grandson, be glad I'm only making you write the apologies because I'm very tempted to kick your ass like I will my team's once they're good and warmed up. You want to be a ninja? Because I'll give you your first lesson for free if you want.”

Konohamaru was quick to shake his head no and sit down to begin his apology and report. I gave him a pretty poor attempt at a smile, it was more of baring my teeth, “Make sure you don't get a thing wrong. Or you'll get your free shinobi lesson anyway.” I threatened. The brat paled under his tan.

Good, about time he learned some respect.

I was probably going to get it for traumatizing the pest, but it was worth it.

Shithead.

I didn't even care that they broke the rules and entered the forbidden area, if they wanted to get killed on their own time then fine. It was the fact that they did it while on a mission babysitting the Honorable Grandson. Akagahara was one of the number one places enemy shinobi tried to infiltrate, hence why it was forbidden. Any person caught in the gated area was immediately executed without question. Team 7 and Konohamaru were extremely lucky that Denryoku had recognized Konohamaru or else they would all be dead and Patrol 18 would have been brought up on charges of killing the Hyuuga heiress, the second son of the Uchiha clan head, the Kyuubi jinchūriki and the grandson of the Third Hokage.

It was a political nightmare just to sort out fill out the paperwork on the incident. I was pissed because I had been dragged into it since I was the sensei and now was under scrutiny for 'abandoning my team' on a mission. Even though D-rank missions didn't require the presence of the sensei, since they were considered 'baby missions' no matter what the chūnin at the mission desk said. But that small little detail was conveniently forgotten when it came to the issue at hand.

I was going to strangle that prick Hyuuga for bringing me up on charges.

Even worse, the whole Uchiha clan had been brought into the mess as well as the Hyuuga and both were now up in arms over accusations against each other. For what, I really didn't care. All I knew was that months of work bringing the Uchiha clan back under the Konoha banner was ruined and we were almost back where we started when the genin graduated.

And everyone was blaming me for not keep a better eye on the trio of brats. And Team 7 had been put on probation for three weeks. No missions at all; which meant Nekobaa was not pleased because only Uchiha were allowed to handle Uchiha merchandise and the idiots that had been sent in Team 7's place lost half of the shipment. That didn't really go over well with Fugaku-sama.

I didn't mind the 'no missions' as much as everything else since I was turning that into my advantage as a way to take my ire out on them the whole team through harsh training. I was also stuck with Konohamaru, though I didn't know why. Probably so he could share in the punishment.

Well, that's what I was taking from it.

Once all three genin stopped in front of me, I immediately pointed to the ground, “Twenty push-ups, forty crunches, and thirty leg lunges. Go!” This time all genin groaned and literally dropped to the ground. I kicked dirt at them, “DO IT!” I roared and ignored their hisses of pain when the dirt got in their eyes.

I did not give a shit what they felt. If they were stupid enough to think 'forbidden' didn't apply to them, then they can suffer a little grit in the face.

Arrogant assholes.

“Konohamaru, join them!” I shouted, turning to the startled boy. He stared at me for a good minute before I pointed at the paper, “That character is written wrong. Twenty push-ups, forty crunches and thirty leg lunges, now.”

“What?! But-”

“NOW! Do not ever question your superior officer. Now put your head down and start!” I snapped harshly, snatching the papers from his hands. I began walking away, crumbling the paper into a ball, when I heard a quiet sob from the boy. I whirled around, “Oh, are you going to cry? Did I upset you? If you're too much of a crybaby then maybe you should just forget about being a ninja, let alone Hokage.” I mocked with a harsh sneer. Large tears were flowing down Konohamaru's eyes now. He was truly crying like the brat he was.

I grabbed him by his ridiculous scarf and shoved him to the ground, “Stop whining, you pathetic little rat.”

“Hey! Leave him alone.”

My head snapped around to glare at Naruto. Sasuke and Hinata had paused in their push-ups and were watching me, but only Naruto was standing and glaring at me. “Did I say stop? Start over–thirty push-ups, fifty crunches, and forty leg lunges.”

Naruto's bright eyes glittered, “What do you want? Are you so cruel that you need to make little kids cry so you feel better? Why, you're nothing but a bully!”

“A bully, huh?” I mused, pulling my fury behind the Uchiha clan's standard emotionless 'I-don't-give-a-shit' mask. “Everyone stand up.” Konohamaru jumped up quickly, rubbing an arm across his messy face, and latched onto Naruto like a leech. Sasuke and Hinata stood up more slowly, but they were giving me glares that were almost on par with Naruto's.

I stared down at them for a long time, taking in each of the child's face. Team 7 were scowling back at me, they were used to me enough that they felt they could get away with it. Konohamaru was sobbing quietly into Naruto's side while Naruto had an arm around him like he was protecting him from me. These four were only kids; kids who broke the rules and almost got killed for it. They needed to know that some rules weren't even allowed to bend without dire consequences.

But…

Somewhere deep down I knew that my harsh treatment was wrong, completely and utterly wrong. I was at a loss of what to do. The only way I could make them truly understand that what they did was not okay was to push them until they broke.

No that wasn't right.

I was taking my anger out on them, I wasn't even trying to teach them. For all they knew they were only suffering through my harsh torture because I felt like it. Because I had finally gone off the deep end.

“Do you know why I'm making you do all this?” I asked, more calmly now that I had time to ponder over my actions.

Naruto, however, hadn't calmed down one bit, “Because you hate us and you get a sick joy outta watching us suffer, `ttebayo!”

I glanced at Sasuke and Hinata to see if they agreed, the sad thing was that they did. Even quiet Hinata was turning rebellious, though after the hell I put her through I wasn't very surprised.

“And if I did, what would you do about it?” I prompted, folding my hands behind my back and waited for them to answer. For the longest time all of them were stumped. Even Konohamaru stopped his crying to peek at Team 7. I think they expected me to defend myself and say I didn't hate them at all, but it was all for their own good.

Or some gooey shit like that.

I didn't let them answer, “Some shinobi are batshit insane, and they might possibly be one of the most loyal ninjas you'd find in the village. There are nuke-nin that are mild mannered; but they betrayed your village's trust, so you still are expected capture them or kill them if you can't. I thought you already realized that no one can be defined as just being good and bad.” Naruto and Sasuke winced, most likely thinking of Haku.

Hinata was still warming up to her new found backbone, “That doesn't give you the right to push around like you do.” She stated in a calm clear voice one would expect from a Hyuuga.

Tilting my head I studied the heiress. Two months had passed under my tutelage and already she was more outspoken than probably ever. She wasn't even stuttering at the moment.

“No it doesn't, but again, what can you do? Go whine to your father or the Hokage? You're stuck with me, Hyuuga, like it or not.”

“It isn't right!” That was Naruto.

“You're right.” I think I just broke all four of their puny brains when I agreed so readily with the dumbass. I scoffed a little, “But then, when is anything we do right? I thought we discussed this, Naruto, back in Wave. It's all a matter of perspective.”

“Since when is beating little kids a matter of perspective?!” Sasuke snapped. Inwardly I laughed at the way Team 7 was ganging up on their sensei.

“Did I touch any of you with the intent to hurt?”

“Don't play your stupid mind games, Yanagi, you know what I meant.”

My eyes narrowed at the blatant sign of disrespect. Defending a child, I could understand. Standing up for oneself, sure go for it. That was always amusing. Disrespect in any form, even during an argument?

You've got five seconds to get the hell out of dodge before I tear you a new one.

“I'm not playing games. It's an honest question. Did I hurt any of you, physically?” I asked, struggling to keep my voice calm now. One more word out of my cousin's mouth and he would suddenly have proof that I was beating little kids like he claimed.

“You hurt-”

I cut Sasuke off before he could continue, “I didn't touch Konohamaru, I grabbed his scarf. Try again.” Any ninja worth their salt knew how to hurt someone without ever touching them.

Before any of them could say another word I tossed four blank scrolls on the ground at their feet, “Training is done. I want all of you to write a full length formal apology to the Patrol that caught you in Akagahara. No copying from anyone else. Go.” I started to walk away, having my own work to fill out.

“Why?”

I didn't care who said it, but it stopped me in my tracks. Why? WHY?! Did they really not understand exactly what could of happened? Slowly I turned back around, my expression not angry as they clearly expected but concern, “Do any of you know why Akagahara is a forbidden area?” I asked slowly.

Four 'no's.

I facepalmed. I couldn't help it, in all my life I never met a group more dense than these idiots. Not even Obito could compete with one of them! “Okay sit down, you're getting another lesson.”

They all remained standing, which was fine by me. “Akagahara is on the border of Konoha, it abuts Training Grounds 44 and 45, which are the furthest training grounds from Konoha. It's also the easier area to navigate through. Guess what that means?”

Sasuke looked like he knew the answer, if his frequent paling was anything to go by. But of course that could be the fatigue catching up with him too. It was a 50/50 chance of being either.

“That means that Akagahara, during the war, was the most common way for intruders to enter into Konoha's surrounding forest. Once enemies got past Akagahara it was a cakewalk to Konohagakure.” Now the rest of the team were turning white. Konohamaru still didn't get it, dammit.

I focused my gaze on the littlest brat, “Akagahara is still the used by enemies to get into our village.” I explained slowly so his childish mind could grasp the concept.

“So? Naruto-nii-san and his friend could take them.” Boy, talk about blind hero worship. My eyebrow twitched, this kid really wasn't getting it. I don't think any of the brats really got the grave circumstance they were in, truly.

I sighed, “Look, because Konoha knows that Akagahara is the easiest way to get in, we put a fence up and made it forbidden, as well as stationed a permanent patrol for the police force. That patrol has orders to kill anything that moves in Akagahara.” I said flatly. There was no sense in sugar-coating it for an idiot as dense as the Hokage's grandson.

Now Konohamaru was joining his 'friends' in utter horror. And that wasn't even the best part.

“The reason why I'm making you write the apology to Patrol 18 is because if Uchiha Denryoku didn't recognize the Honorable Grandson, all of you would be dead. You four are some of the most politically sensitive brats in Konoha; can you imagine what Patrol 18 would be facing if they had killed you? The Hyuuga and Uchiha clans would be calling for blood, it might even boil into a clan war between the two. The Hokage wouldn't be any help as he would be biased over losing Konohamaru and Naruto. Many of the jounin, and even the Council of Elders, would be up in arms over Naruto's death as well.” For all the wrong reasons, but I wasn't about to tell an emotionally neglected child that, “Hell, in a worst case scenario the whole village would probably melt down into total chaos, which would then prompt another Hidden Village to attack and might start another Shinobi War.”

Silence reigned down on the brats as I let the new information sink in, they were finally understanding what exactly could have happened.

Hinata bent down and picked up one of the blank scrolls. She stared at it for a good minute before tucking it in her weapons pouch and turned to look at me, “I'll give my apology to you in the morning, Yanagi-sensei.” She said calmly before leaving. If it wasn't for that ridiculous boyish haircut, I'd say that another Hyuuga was impersonating her; but Hinata was the only Hyuuga with that styled hair so it was impossible.

No one was desperate enough to act like Hinata to actually cut their hair like that.

Sasuke was the next one to pick up the scroll. He glared at the innocent roll of paper then at me and walked away without saying a word.

Naruto picked up both his and Konohamaru's, “Is that true? What you said about the jounin and stuff?” He almost sounded scared, as if I would say no just to laugh at him.

Dammit I was hoping he wouldn't ask that, “Yes.” Let him come to his own false conclusion that they actually cared for him as a person and not the ultimate weapon of the village. I wasn't going to be the one to break his heart. I was an unpleasant woman, hell even I'd readily admit to being a bitch; but I wasn't inhuman.

I left without another word.

vvv

“Thought I'd find you here.” Someone said behind me. I grunted and poured myself another helping of Awamori. If I remembered correctly the person talking was normally more cheerful and I wasn't supposed to talk to him.

Well screw it, I talk to who I want.

Shisui sat down beside me and pulled the bottle of Awamori towards him to read the label, “Thirty-eight percent alcohol? Wow you must be depressed this time.” I couldn't tell if he was being sarcastic or not.

“Shu'up.” I slurred angrily and tried to yank the bottle out of his grasp, but only succeeded in nearly toppling off the bar stool. If Shisui hadn't reached out with his free hand and grabbed my elbow I'd be on the floor.

“I think you've had enough tonight. Time to go home.” He said and gently pried the alcohol dish from my fingers before setting it down. As Shisui stood, I just continued to stare at the remaining liquid in the glass. It looked so graceful, swirling slowly in the shallow dish as the light directly above reflected off of it.

“`M a 'orrible sen'ei, ain't I?” I whispered.

Shisui didn't immediately answer as he slowly eased me up on his back. I took his silence to be a 'yes'. I was the worst sensei on earth, that scum that Nii-san always talked about. I could blame my team and Konohamaru all I wanted, but in reality I was the only person to blame. If I was a better teacher I would have warned the kids why that place was avoided, and I sure as hell wouldn't traumatize them when I was told about it.

Shisui tsked and readjusted his grip on my legs as he walked out of the seedy bar he had found me in. Apparently I had been thinking out loud, “You're not the best sensei out there, but I wouldn't write you off as scum yet, Yanagi-chan. And how were you to know those kids were foolish enough to go to Akagahara?” Damn man. Why was he always so cheerful and optimistic?!

Stupid Shisui and his stupid reasoning. I pressed my cheek into the back of his shirt and pouted. Why was it stupid Shisui that found me? Why couldn't it be some other officer that I didn't know who wouldn't try to give me a stupid pep talk as he brought me home?

“You smell.” I mumbled after a pregnant pause.

This time Shisui laughed softly. I couldn't help but smile a little at his chuckle. That's just how it was; whenever Shisui laughed people couldn't help but smile or laugh with him. It was almost like his laughter was a spell for happiness. “You're one to talk, Yagi.” He returned.

I pouted again, “…Di'nt say it was bad.” Shisui always smelled like freshly turned earth and crushed grass with only the faintest undertone of metal. The scent brought up memories of long past summers spent sprawling on the ground after hours of sparring together. If I closed my eyes I could almost imagine us being silly teenagers again, and Shisui was carrying me home because I was tired from a day of endless spars and not because I was intoxicated.

But that was before the drama of the Uchiha coup, and when I opened my eyes that perfect rosy scene faded back into harsh reality. My already depressed mood sunk even lower and I almost felt like crying.

Shisui seemed to pick up on my mood, “Is Yagi-chan complimenting me?! The world must be ending!” He said in a dramatic flair. It was a desperate attempt to take my mind off of other things. Sadly it didn't work.

“Shaddap, Eyelashes.” I said in all seriousness, though I did appreciate that he was trying to cheer me up.

“I haven't heard that nickname in forever. You must really be drunk.” The only other curly haired Uchiha commented.

I didn't respond immediately. I was thinking the circumstances over and I wasn't liking the conclusion I was coming to, “How much trouble am I in?” I finally asked, resigning myself to my fate. I knew from the second I first forced Team 7 into that harsh training that there would be repercussions. Really bad ones at that.

Shisui turned serious, only further proving that I was in deep shit. If Shisui was serious then I was definitely in trouble, otherwise he would try to reassure me that everything was alright and I was just being ridiculous.

“Not all that good. Fugaku-sama and Hyuuga-sama are definitely not pleased, and neither is the Hokage.” Shisui relayed calmly. I simply laid my forehead against his shoulder. I saw that one coming by a mile. But oh did it get worse, “What with you having not been with your team when they were caught in Akagahara and now this… Hyuuga-sama is calling for your permanent resignation from the shinobi forces.”

That managed to get through my foggy brain. I jerked my head back in surprise and immediately regretted it when the pounding headache cropped up in retaliation. “Wha-?! He can't do that!” I snapped, my words clear and forceful. Only the Hokage or my clan leader could force my resignation.

Shisui hefted me up further on his back and gave me a look over his shoulder for nearly waking up the neighborhood, “That's what Fugaku-sama said and the Hokage agreed; which is why you have an appointment with Yamanaka Asao tomorrow morning at ten.”

I groaned and dropped my head back onto Shisui's shoulder. Yamanaka Asao, or as I called him Ass-ao, was the Uchiha clan's personal therapist. Every clan had their own Yamanaka therapist who was informed of almost every clan secret to avoid having said secrets accidentally leaking out during a session.

Our Yamanaka had a standing appointment with any Uchiha that activated their sharingan; so he could make sure that the stupid Curse of Hatred didn't crop up. Only Itachi and Shisui were exempt because of they were exceptions to every single Uchiha cliché known, the lucky bastards. Hell, even Kakashi had to visit Asao because of his borrowed sharingan.

Asao, on top of his normal duties as a therapist, was also the clan's standard medic because Uchiha's were utterly hopeless when it came to medical ninjutsu; I was considered the best in the clan at medical ninjutsu and to any other medic I was considered utterly hopeless. Most clansmen found their own medic though.

Because Yamanaka Ass-ao also happened to be one vindictive little shit.

“If Asao-san diagnosis you as mentally unstable than Fugaku-sama will demote you to being a secretary in the police force and the Hokage will assign another jounin to your team.” Shisui added, almost sounding regretful. I didn't blame him, I could handle losing my team, maybe, but secretary?!

I'd rather walk into Kumo and offer to be their Sharingan breeding cow.

“Jus kill me now.” I grumbled into Shisui's shirt. Like I said, Asao was a vindictive asshole and he found fault in every Uchiha. When asked if the Nidaime or Ass-ao was more spiteful towards the Uchiha clan, Asao would win hand down every time. I wouldn't put it past that worm to say I was mentally ill just so there would be 'one less Uchiha on active duty'.

Shisui gave an exasperated sigh, “Asao wouldn't do that.”

I must have been talking out loud again. Stupid drunkenness. “Like you know. You don' `isit Asao, you don' know what he like.”

My escort home, if you could call him that, stayed silent for a good while before asking in a resigned voice, “Want me to come with you tomorrow?” Why'd he have to sound so reluctant? I wasn't that bad, was I? Maybe to my team but I just normally ignored Shisui, wasn't like he ever minded or nothing.

“Naw, I won' like ya to'arrow.”

“Oh, but you like me now?”

“…Shu'up and ge' me home.” I said, blatantly avoiding the question. Shisui was my friend tonight. Tomorrow, he would be that goofy idiot that I ignored. Shisui laughed and laughed at my response though, and that made me feel just a bit better.

vvv

Nii-san was pounding on the bathroom door, “Yanagi! Get your ass in gear, your appointment is in ten minutes!” Hypocrite. It was perfectly fine for him to be late five hours, but kami forbid that I be late by a second.

“Like that ass Asao would fail me if I was a minute late.” I snapped back as I tried to pull my rebellious hair up in it's standard high ponytail. Unfortunately I had made the mistake of going to bed with it still wet from my shower last night–forced by Nii-san because he 'wasn't going to have the house reek of alcohol'–and that meant my hair was ten times as unruly than normal. Baring my teeth at my reflection in frustration I dropped my arms and let the dark brown coils fall loosely down my back. It wasn't like I was going to be doing anything today that required my hair being up. The meeting with the Yamanaka would take up most of the day and then there was nothing until the evening; Mikoto-oba had invited Obito and I to have dinner and she had strongly suggested that we be there.

When Mikoto suggested anything, you had better do it or you'd discover the reason why she had been called the Terror of Genyo Pass in the Third War.

Giving up on my hair I stormed out of the bathroom, past my brother, and grabbed my sunglasses. “See you tonight, and you better not be late this time. I'm not making any excuse, you can just try to explain it to our aunt yourself.” I threatened as I headed for the door. Obito followed behind me, absently reassuring me as he flopped down on the living room couch with his daily dose of porn in hand.

Disgusting.

Even with the sunglasses on, my eyes still watered at the brightness of the outside world. I wasn't as hungover as I thought I'd be, but it was still enough to feel the symptoms. Luckily, as a kunoichi, being hungover wasn't as bad as to what a civilian might feel. With the amount of alcohol I had consumed last night, a civilian might be in the hospital with alcohol poisoning. Instead, due to chakra boosting a ninja's metabolism to a much higher rate than average, I was only mildly hungover. It was both a blessing and a curse. Shinobi had no problem sliding back into the swing of things the next day, even if they had passed out the night before; however it took them much longer to get inebriated.

As soon as my eyesight cleared I turned straight around and stalked back into the house, “Nii-san! What is that… thing doing out there?!” I yelled at my brother.

Shisui poked his head in the doorway, “Thing? I'm hurt, Yagi-chan.” I glowered at him. If the door didn't swing outward I would have tried to slam it closed on his head.

My brother chortled quite evilly, “My kohai offered to escort you. He said you expressed to being worried about Asao last night when he brought you home. Just have her at the Main House by six, Shisui-kun.”

“Can do, senpai!” Shisui chirped, giving my treacherous older brother a two fingered salute.

“Wha-?!” I squawked, but didn't get to finish as Shisui grabbed me by the waist and physically dragged me out of my own home. The last thing I heard was Obito yelling at me to let go of the door frame before I broke it.

I nearly fell over, disoriented and confused at the sudden change in footing. A hand reached out to steady me but I swatted it away with a vengeance and took a step back to find my balance. I gave the very smug looking Shisui my best stink eye for that stunt he had just pulled. Stupid shunshin master, I hadn't even felt him build up chakra! That was just being too good at your favorite jutsu if you asked me.

Shisui's smug smile turned into a pout, “I thought we were over all this, Yagi-chan.” He said and turned those damn puppy eyes of his on me. I glared back; being a master of that look myself I was immune to it. And when the hell did he get that notion anyway? I was flat out drunk last night, and drunk people do stupid things they normally wouldn't do.

Like talking to someone whom you've sworn never to speak to again for the rest of eternity.

Instead of answering, I turned on my heel and stormed away. I only got maybe three feet before Shisui caught up to me with his longer stride, “Oi oi oi, ya know the word 'escort' normally means that they're walking with you, right?” I simply gave him the universal one finger sign of 'go away'.

Like always, Shisui didn't react, he only shrugged it off with a grin. There had only been three instances when I had truly pissed Shisui off. Once was when I confronted him about the reason for which I now ignore him, another was when I bashed a criminal records book over his head, and the third was only last year when I had tossed one of Nekobaa's cats at his face.

Shisui is allergic to cats.

Thankfully Shisui seemed to understand that we were back to Square One in which I ignored him no matter what he said or did. For several minutes we walked causally in blissful silence. Well, I stalked down the streets, with a look on my face that made bystanders scramble to get out of my way; and he just strolled in the wake I left.

“I like your hair down like that.”

Damn it.

vvv 3rd Person~ Sasuke vvv

“Hey where's Frizzy-sensei?” Naruto asked, sitting up from where he had been lounging on the ground.

Sasuke gave his dumbest teammate a look, “She hasn't arrived yet.” Mentally the Uchiha hoped she never arrived. Hopefully the meeting that Tou-san had gone to late last night was so that Yanagi was removed from being their sensei.

“But, it's been four hours since she told us to meet here, and Sensei is never late.” Naruto knew that for a fact. He had once staked out their training grounds for the night, determined to beat Yanagi at the internal, unspoken 'get there before Sensei does' game Team 7 seemed to have. Somehow she must have realized what he was doing, because she had stayed there that night just so Naruto couldn't show her up.

Stupid Yanagi-sensei and her overzealous competitiveness.

“So what?”

“So… don't you think it's weird that the Time Machine Jounin is late?” Sasuke honestly didn't know how Naruto came up with the variety of nicknames he had for their sensei. And Sasuke definitely didn't want to know about the nicknames the dobe had for him.

“She probably got demoted and taken off the team. Tou-san had a late night meeting with the Hokage after I told him what happened yesterday.”

“T-t-that's right… M-m-my O-Otou-sama did the s-s-same.” Hinata added. Both males glanced at their stuttering teammate, each with their own levels of concern. Ever since the Wave mission they had noticed that Hinata's stutter had decreased, almost to the point that she didn't stutter at all unless talking to Naruto– though only Sasuke noticed that part. After yesterday's torture lesson, Hinata likely had regressed back into her old habits.

Naruto turned back to the matter at hand, “Yeah, and where is Konohamaru anyway? He's supposed to be with us.” The blonde's blue eyes widened in fear and he leaned in, “You don't think… she killed him, do you?”

Sasuke sighed in exasperation and hung his head. If Naruto kept his stupid rumor mongering, every child in Konoha would think his cousin was some kind of monster that hid under the bed and ate little kids for dessert. Konohamaru's classmates already thought that Yanagi was some kind of vampire; Sasuke had heard his younger relatives talking about how to 'excise' her.

Before Sasuke could find the patience to answer his lummox of a teammate, someone else did. “While I wouldn't put it past her, Yanagi-chan has more finesse than that. You'd never be able to pin it on her, at the very least.”

All of Team 7 looked high up in Yanagi's favorite tree, past her normal branch, where a grey haired masked man lounged, his nose in a small orange book that both Sasuke and Hinata recognized and dreaded immensely. Sasuke recognized him as one of Obito's teammates.

“Eh?! Who are you?!” Naruto shouted and rudely pointed up at the older man.

The stranger turned to look at the three genin and his only visible eye tilted in an odd way so that it gave the impression that he was smiling, “I'm your sensei for the day, while Yanagi is out… sick.”

“Well you're late! Frizzy-sensei said never to be late!”

“Maa… a black cat crossed my path so I had to take the long way around.”

vvv Normal POV vvv

Asao hummed as he pretended to scribbled some shitty notes down. I had a suspicion that he was just doodling. He didn't stop 'writing' even when I had stopped talking for several minutes. I already knew that the little worm wasn't listening to me. For almost ten minutes I had called him every insult under the moon and he didn't so much as twitch.

Being a relatively regular patient of his, I knew that Asao was not that thick-skinned.

“And how would you say that makes you feel?” He questioned in that stupid condescending 'I'm the doctor here and you're the nutty patient' voice he always used. Even when he wasn't on duty. I had the misfortune of running into the asshole when I was taking a message to Yamanaka Inoichi, that was just his default tone.

It was so nauseating I wanted to throw up.

“Like I wanna strangle something.” I said dryly and looked out the ridiculously small window, which also happened to be barred. Nothing like having to talk about your repressed feelings in a room that felt like it was a refurbished prison cell.

And honestly, they could have just left the cell like it was, since the 'redesign' sucked.

Ass-ao's sandy head whipped up from his notepad and he pinned me with a look, “Are you feeling violent now, Uchiha-san?”

Oh please, that he heard?! Now I was sure he was just waiting for me to say some shit like that so he could write me off as mentally unstable.

Like I said: vindictive asshole.

“No. I'm feeling oddly calm, like I've just had a spiritual purge of all the negative energy within my system. Please, O Great Guru of the Mystic Beings, continue your instructions so that I may become one with the universe like you.” Finally I got a twitch from the pompous bastard.

“Sarcasm doesn't become you.”

“Oi! I'm the queen of sarcasm, don't insult me!”

“I thought you were the Blackmail Queen.”

“Well a queen can have two titles, dipshit.”

“Do you see yourself as a queen? Do you have feelings of superiority over others?”

I threw my head back with a great groan. Trust a Yamanaka to turn a simple sentence into some insight on a damn nonexistent mental disorder. I'd hate to be a Yamanaka, it would get very old very quickly if I felt the need to psychoanalysis every word said to me.

“I'm a damn Uchiha, of course I have a superiority complex; because it sure as hell isn't an inferiority complex.” I snapped back. It seemed that every Uchiha suffered through one of the two mental states to some degree. They either felt like they were a gift from Kami or that they were worthless trash that no one cared about. Unless you were balanced people like Itachi and Shisui.

“Do you feel superior to me?”

“Do you really want me to answer that question?”

There was a moment of silence then: “…No. Let's move on.”

Thought so, jackass.

vvv 3rd Person vvv

“Man, this new sensei sucks! He just gave us some stupid missions and followed us around all day reading! He didn't even try to teach us anything!” Naruto complained as Team 7 left the Missions Desk Office at the end of their day.

“You'd rather run around a training field all day with our psychotic old sensei trying to emotionally break us every second?” Sasuke asked sarcastically. He didn't like the new sensei either, Kakashi he had learned, but he was still loads better than Yanagi-sensei.

Naruto squinted at the mention of yesterday, “Well, no. But Frizzy-sensei normally isn't so… uh… evil. She's kinda funny when she's not yelling at us.”

Behind the two boys Hinata nodded, though neither saw it.

“When isn't she yelling at us?”

“When she's yelling at someone else,” Naruto returned quickly. He paused for a moment then added in a mischievous tone, “her nicknames are really funny actually… Duckass.”

Sasuke shot his stupid teammate a dark look, “Her nicknames are not amusing at all, they're insulting.” He stated firmly.

“Oh come on! Don't tell me you weren't a little amused by 'Peach-boy'! Calling someone as strong as Zabuza that is just hilarious.”

“I'm surprised you even know that word.”

“Oi!”

“G-g-guys, let's not f-f-f-fight.” Hinata interjected before either boy could warm up to the argument that was starting. When the team was first formed, Yanagi-sensei had given the job of maintaining order to Hinata; and she was just finally starting to be confident enough to try and mediate between Naruto and Sasuke's fights.

Both boys glanced back at their shy teammate and then at each other. Though neither would admit it, they were both in agreement that they had to watch out for Hinata since she was so shy and fragile. She didn't know it, but she could probably order them to do almost anything and they would do it without complaining because it was Hinata. They felt the need to protect her from everything; from chaotic cats to their insane sensei.

“Training?” Naruto prompted, changing the subject. Yanagi-sensei had beat into them pretty early on that they had better train sometimes in their downtime, or training with her would be utter hell.

And they had already gotten a taste of Utter Hell; there was no reason to try and seek it out.

Sasuke shook his head, “Kaa-chan wants me home before dinner. Something about someone having dinner with the family.” He explained. In reality he'd rather train with Naruto. They had actually been a decent team on the Wave bridge and he wanted to see if they could hone their skill.

Hinata hesitated, not liking being put on the spot. She would love to train with Naruto, but she was concerned that she might faint if it were just Naruto and herself. “I-I can… but only for a h-hour, N-Naruto-kun.” She finally decided. She didn't think she would be any help, but Naruto seemed to think otherwise.

He brightened, “Great! You can help me with that silent technique Frizzy-sensei taught you! Come on!” And with that Naruto grabbed the bright red Hinata and practically dragged her away. Sasuke watched amused and feeling only slight pity for Hinata. His female teammate was in no condition prepared to deal with the hyperactivity that Naruto consistently exuded; but if she was determined to keep that crush of hers, she might as well learn how to deal with it.

vvv Normal POV vvv

“Well look at the bright side, Yagi-chan…” Shisui tried to cheer me up as we walked back to the Uchiha Compound, “Asao-san didn't say you were mentally unstable.”

I crossed my arms with a scowl. Ass-ao might have cleared me of being batshit insane, but he did diagnose me as emotionally repressed, with a superior complex in general, anger management issues, and a plethora of tragic memories that possibly lead to all of said conditions. I was suspended for three weeks to see professionals to take care of my issues; and if I failed to show to the people that Asao recommended I'd be suspended indefinitely until I did see them.

Although the anger management issue came from when I threw a chair at the bastard's face for bringing up Obito's temporary KIA status during the Third War.

Really, he was asking for that one though.

“Ah well. Here we are, Yagi-chan, I delivered you safely to the Main House!” What do you want, a medal? “I had fun today, Yagi-chan. We should do this more often… though it's better when your drunk.” Shisui added teasingly. I tried to punch him, I really did, but he seemed to know exactly what I was going to do for he utilized the shunshin jutsu to get away and my fist went through the air where his gut had been.

Piss ant.

I glared at the spot where Shisui had been standing, as if it had somehow betrayed me by not holding the man there for a second longer, before stalking inside. I never bothered knocking since the only one who really cared was Fugaku and I didn't give a shit what he thought anyway.

“Mikoto-oba, I'm here!” I called as I sat down to take off my sandals.

Instead of my aunt answering there was the pounding of someone running towards the entrance than Sasuke shouted, “What are you doing here?”

I turned to give my student and youngest cousin a flat look. But before I could give a snappy comeback his mother came to greet me, “Oh good! Obito-kun is already here, now we can eat. Come, Yanagi, I made Nikujaga just for you.”

Okay I had my suspicions before, but now I was certain that this whole thing was a set up. My aunt never made Nikujaga because Sasuke hated sweet foods. The only time she did make it was when the family was at odds and she had been forced to play the mediator; most often between her husband and Obito or I.

No wonder Shisui didn't try to mooch a meal off of Mikoto like he normally did. He knew what was going on, the traitor.

vvv

Silence reigned supreme over the whole meal. The only people who weren't giving me dirty looks throughout dinner was Mikoto-oba and Obito, though Nii-san looked like he was constantly on the verge of laughing. At least Mikoto-oba had the decency not to bring drama to the table.

Unlike a few people I knew of.

I was the last one to finish, mostly because I was stalling for time, and as soon as I laid down my chopsticks Fugaku-sama was standing, “Yanagi, come with me.” He ordered.

I exhaled a long sigh and looked at my brother sitting across from me. Obito had his silly grin on and was cheerfully waving good-bye when I looked at him. Then he stood and gathered his and Sasuke's dishes, “Mikoto-oba, let me help you.” Oh so he'd help Mikoto do the dishes, but left me to do all the chores at home. Jackass.

“Yanagi.” Fugaku snapped when I was taking too long.

“Alright alright! Don't have a cow, I'm coming.” I said defensively as I stood up and stalked after my uncle to the common meeting room.

The common meeting room opened to the outside and was closer to the living quarters of the Main House, thus making it easier to spy on. It was where most public discussions took place, or official reprimands. The private meeting room, located under the Naka shrine, was only used for serious issues; like excommunications from the clan, planning coup d'états, and–in the past when Konoha was first founded–executions.

I wasn't really surprised to find four of the eight clan Elders all sitting in a semi-circle. Fugaku waited until I was inside the room before shutting the door with an audible snap and taking his place at the apex of the arc. I barely refrained from rolling my eyes as I bowed to the Elders and knelt down on the uncomfortable tatami mats. No soft pillow for me, the jerks.

“Your condition?” The furthermost Elder sitting to the right questioned. If I remember correctly, her name was Sayako and she was not only the oldest Uchiha, but one of the oldest individuals in the village. She also happened to have a soft spot for my brother, as did most of the elderly.

I leaned over in a bow, placing my hands flat against the ground and lowered my head until my forehead brushed the tatami mat, “Honorable Elders, Clan leader… I reported to Yamanaka Asao as ordered. He has deemed me to be mentally sound, however…” At that everyone tensed. “I am to report for professional help for the next three weeks on account of anger issues and repressed emotions.”

I think I heard one of the more crotchety old coots mutter something about not being all that surprised, but I couldn't tell.

Fugaku gestured for me to continue. I sat up and placed my palms flat against my thighs, “I have been cleared to resume normal duty as soon as my three weeks of suspension are up.”

My uncle dipped his head and turned to the Elders, “Then the issue is solved.” He said in that flat tone he used when addressing the Elders. Fugaku and I didn't get along at all. We disagreed on almost everything; but one of the sparingly few times we did agree on something was that the Elders were just a bunch of bored busybodies who had nothing better to do than to bother the clan leader about trivial things.

Hibiki, a particularly nasty Elder, sputtered, “Just like that?! This gaki has nearly mentally traumatized one of our most promising genin of this generation and she gets away with a slap on the wrist?!” Funny how he made it clear that he didn't care for Sasuke as a person, just a tool to better the Uchiha clan.

“It was by the order of the Hokage that Uchiha Yanagi be able to continue as a sensei if she were to pass the mental examination.” Fugaku said. There was a rustling of unease that clearly stated exactly what the Elders thought of their Hokage. I breathed deeply through my nose and made sure not to stiffen up. Unrest among the Elders meant that it would soon leak out into the rest of the clan, which could possibly lead to another coup.

Sayako grumbled as she climbed to her feet, leaning heavily on her walking cane. The Elder beside her and Fugaku both jolted as if to assist her, but the spry old woman was already on her feet. “The issue is closed, as Fugaku-sama said. Complaining about it won't change a thing. I'm going to bed!” And with that the old woman hobbled past me and out the door.

We could all still hear her go from an ornery badger to a cooing grandmotherly figure. Most likely that meant that Obito was out there eavesdropping; in fact I would bet that everyone except Itachi, who would have found a much better hiding spot, was just standing outside the sliding doors.

Leave it to my brother to turn the woman said to have intimidated all Hokage from the Shodaime to the Yondaime to turn into a mushy old granny.

#Script's Archives #sensei fanfic #naruto fanfiction #fanfiction

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evil-overlord-scriptology · 5 years ago

Text

But I Don’t Want to be a Sensei! Pt 5 (ARCHIVED)

Chapters 16 & 17

Chapter 16: A Different Kind of Peach

“No.”

Naruto pouted, “Awwww, c'mon, sensei! Please? I'll be extra careful!” The blonde little brat batted his eyelashes up at me with an innocent smile. I was not amused, mostly because of the fact that a twelve year old boy could flutter his eyelashes and I couldn't.

“No.”

Naruto opened in mouth again, but Haku interrupted him, “Naruto-kun, please don't irritate Yanagi-san. She is still healing.” Zabuza and I snorted at the exact same time. There wasn't much Haku could do to silence Naruto other than hitting him upside the head with a skillet like I was going on doing if the little shit didn't shut his trap.

Surprisingly enough, Naruto listened to the older teen and edged over to where Sasuke was still resting. It had been three days since the fight on the bridge, or so Peaches said. I had been surprised that I had slept that long, but not so surprised about Sasuke. He had been to the point of complete chakra depletion, just barely alive. Not only was it past the point of no return, but this drain was Sasuke's first brush with chakra exhaustion so it would take a while for his coils to fill back up.

The second Naruto was out of hearing range I glared up at Zabuza who was sitting against a wall next to my futon, “Bastard.” I snapped.

He only smirked and crossed his arms, trying to maintain an innocent look like he didn't know what the hell I was talking about. I don't know why he even bothered, he was the only one here who even saw me use the Fan of Wonders so he was the only one who could have told Naruto.

I bet he did it just to mess with me.

Damn it, don't tell me this man was another Shisui!

Haku sighed quietly behind me and cool hands gently grasped my shoulders, “Yanagi-san, please don't talk much. Otherwise the poultice won't stick to your jaw.” He chided as he forced me to slowly lay back down on the futon provided for me.

The ice user had turned out to be a healer too. But unlike Konohagakure, which had a monopoly on medical ninjutsu thanks to Lady Tsunade, Haku didn't know how to heal with chakra. He simply got by with herbs and backwater remedies, which was what most Kiri nins learned in lieu of medical ninjutsu. It was better than Iwa's 'tough it out, it doesn't hurt' ideology at least.

I was lucky really that Haku turned out to be what some might call a medic; otherwise I would have to suffer with a fractured jawbone and gaping chest wound all the way back to Konoha since I lacked the talent to heal myself– it was kind of pathetic that I was the best healer in the Uchiha clan, really; and it showed just how bad Uchiha members were at medical ninjutsu.

The bratling had just better be glad that he never really meant to kill Sasuke, only put him in a temporary state of death. Otherwise I would be the worst patient I could possibly be.

Peach-boy snickered at my quiet compliance to being manhandled by his student, and I threw Haku's pestle at the grey skinned nuke-nin in retaliation. It infuriated me that he caught it. Haku sighed in a way that made me think he was the adult and we were the children. Honestly I didn't blame him; other than Tsunami, Haku was probably the only mature person in Tazuna's house. Tazuna had been kind enough to offer his home to both my team and the Kiri nuke-nins while we recuperated; he also disregarded the fact that Zabuza and Haku had tried their damnedest to kill him not too long ago. Maybe I had misjudged the man.

He must be more stupid than I thought.

“Hey Frizzy-sensei! Sasuke-teme is waking up!” Naruto shouted from the other side of the room. I debated briefly between throwing the mortar that went with the pestle at the loud kid or joining him at my cousin's bedside.

Haku decided for me when he leveled a stern look at me, “Don't get up, you might reopen your wound.”

“Which?” I asked, deliberately being obtuse. I had only been wounded at the chest, and Haku's reaction was too hilarious to pass up on.

Like I predicted, Haku blushed and stuttered. It had turned into a rather entertaining game for me to make Haku blush, almost as fun as irritating Sasuke. The ice user was at that awkward age where talking about the other sex's anatomy was very uncomfortable, and I milked it for all it was worth. The boy's visible eye started drifting to my chest before he abruptly jerked his gaze away and stared vehemently at the poor wall. There was a pause before the teen scrambled to his feet and hurried over to check on Sasuke.

Or to get away from me, it was hard to tell.

Which Haku out of my hair, I turned my head to eye the Demon of the Mist, who was trying his hardest not to laugh, “Now what?” I asked. I was really hating not being able to speak much, but at least I could speak again.

Peach-boy shrugged and didn't answer me.

Not amused, I reached out and flicked the man's big toe, since it was the closest thing to me. Zabuza gave me a funny look to which I returned with a lopsided grin. Now that we weren't enemies I planned to annoy the man to the best of my abilities. With no Kakashi-nii or Nii-san around, I was feeling a little deprived of annoying people. Team 7 didn't count, they were just traumatized whenever I pulled funny shit.

After failed for several minutes of trying to get a reaction out of the nuke-nin, I reached to my left where Haku had placed my weapons pouch–why did that brat even touch a foreign ninja's weapons pouch was beyond me–and yanked out a my Fan of Wonders. It surprised me that someone, probably Haku, had thought to retrieve the weapon from the bridge; but I wasn't going to complain. The thing was expensive as hell and I would probably never earn enough money to replace the one I had; Kakashi and Obito had to split the cost of it when they had it commissioned for me when I made jounin rank. Besides, I was attached to the fan I had for obvious reasons. Planting my right elbow into the floor, I managed to push myself into a sitting position with the fan in my lap. I really wanted to just lay on my futon and bother Zabuza, but I had a stupid report to fill out.

Kill me.

Zabuza had a strange look on his face as he watched me take my field pen and ink block out of their hiding places. He had already seen the senbon launcher and the kunai blade during our fight, so it was no wonder he looked a little amazed at the fan's many hidden compartments. Peaches even choked a little when I twisted the heel sole of my discarded right sandal and pulled out a blank miniature scroll, the perfect size for a messenger hawk to carry.

“Is there anything you don't hide?” The nuke-nin drawled as I made the ink.

I gave him a dry look, “My temper.” I deadpanned then ignored Peach-boy as I hurried to write my post battle report. It had already been three days since the battle, if I waited any longer the Hokage was bound to strangle me for mimicking my brothers' habitual laziness.

'Yellow Update

Mission status: Complete

Team: Genin Team 7

Report: Team encountered A-class nuke-nin, Momochi Zabuza at Destination, with Identified Ally: Yuki Haku. Battle ensued, Team Leader heavily injured: Fractured Jawbone and Wound to Chest. Genin A heavily injured: Temporary Death State and Chakra Depletion. Genin A activated Kekke Genkai, will require Clan Guidance upon Return. Genin B has temporarily Accessed S-Ranked Secret; unknown to all members of Team. Battle concluded with No Deaths in either Party. Deaths of Mercenaries and Gang Leader: Gatou. Temporary Truce with A-class nuke-nin, Momochi Zabuza and Ally. Full Report Due upon Team's Return. Will attempt to solve remaining problem with Diplomacy.'

I waved the unbound scroll in the air like a little ribbon to dry the ink faster, before rolling it up and painting two bands around the outside, marking it as Moderate Priority. The report was only a post battle report and didn't require the immediate attention of the Hokage; but still, Sasuke's activation of the Sharingan, Naruto's use of the red chakra, and Zabuza's change of heart were all important events that the Hokage should know about before Team 7 made it back home. Especially since he would have to inform the Uchiha clan about Sasuke.

I was about to tie up the problem with Gatou too when Haku found his courage again and descended on me like a vengeful Ice Princess.

Peach-boy was no help at all.

vvv

Another three weeks went by as we all waited for the bridge to be completed and for Sasuke to regain his strength to move out. The Hokage had sent back a response via my messenger hawk that Zabuza and Haku would accompany us to Konoha, not as prisoners but to work out a deal with the Hokage. I had used my sharingan and a pilfered slip of paper with Gatou's writing on it to forge a will stating that the deceased man's entire fortune went to Zabuza; to give the Kiri nuke-nin an excuse and a place to stay out of trouble. It was for Konoha's benefit; we would lose a customer, but gain an ally and a foothold against Kirigakure if the village ever needed it. After all, a shinobi never wasted an opportunity to plan ahead.

Unless you were a numskull like Naruto.

“No, no, no! I can't find it, it's gone!” Naruto cried as he rifled through his mission's pack with desperation to find something. Haku and Hinata were the only ones to watch the brat panic in genuine concern while Sasuke just glared at Haku whenever he thought no one was looking. Zabuza and I straight up did not care.

“N-Naruto-kun... what are you looking for?” Hinata asked. She had been acting strangely ever since the fight and I fully intended to wring it out of her the second we got home. Or possibly throw her at Obito and let Mr. Feelings deal with the Hyuuga heiress since I already failed at the emotional buddy-buddy thing.

At least she wasn't stuttering much anymore.

Naruto groaned and jammed his stubby little finger into his hair in frustration, “Teuchi gave me a coupon for one free order of ramen and I know I had it on me!” I groaned quietly and pinched my nose. I should have known that this was about damn ramen. I was seriously contemplating on sending Naruto to therapy over his addiction to ramen; but I was sure Kushina would roll over in her grave if I did.

Actually, knowing her, she'd just haunt my ass from the afterlife.

I shuddered at the possibility and dropped the thought. The last thing I needed was Naruto's mother coming after me as a ghost. She had been scary enough alive and I didn't want to suffer through another concussion courtesy of a dead Uzumaki woman.

Zabuza shot me a curious look, which I pointedly ignored. I didn't wish to add insanity to the list of things Zabuza thought about me.

My sensei instincts kicked in by then and I looked up to see Naruto starting to run off, “Hey! Get your ass back here!” I snapped. There wasn't time for this; the Hokage expected us back in a week and I sure as hell wasn't going to let something as stupid as a misplaced coupon delay our return any further.

“I'll be right back, I swear!” Naruto called over his shoulder. He was gone in a flash, probably thinking that I was going to chase him. I swear that kid was learning to quickly on how to evade my ire, I had a feeling that I was becoming predictable. And a ninja often created very bizarre situations just so they lost their predictability.

Obito-nii was going to suffer from a butt load of pranks when I got home.

Haku started after my brat, “I'll get him.” He said calmly before zipping off.

I pursed my lips and grabbed Sasuke by his Uchiha collar as he began to walk in the opposite direction of Naruto and Haku, “You're going after them.”

My cousin gave me a very teenager look, “Are you serious?” If I didn't know better, I would say he was whining. In the back of my mind, I groaned. Great, now Sasuke was getting to the teenage rebellion stage and Naruto would likely follow soon. There was going to be a lot of head bashing in their future if they didn't pass through the stage quickly.

“Yes.” I deadpanned and shoved him back towards the Land of Waves. The boy heaved a sigh and started walking slowly back the way we came. My hand twitched and I came this close to finishing what Haku started. The damn brat was being difficult on purpose!

Once the damn little cocky Uchiha prince of the brats was gone, Peach-boy turned to me, “You still don't trust us.” It wasn't a question.

I scoffed, “I trust Haku, at least when it comes to Naruto. It's you I don't trust.”

“When why-”

“Why did I send Sasuke after the other two boys?” I finished from him. I shrugged, “Have you seen the was Sasuke glares at Haku? I don't want to deal with that drama for the rest of the week. They can all work out their problems away from me. I'm their sensei, not a damn therapist. Now come along, Hinata, if I remember correctly there's a tea shop around here somewhere.” I didn't leave the Hyuuga any choice as I grabbed her wrist and forcibly dragged her along. I could hear Zabuza sighing then fell in step beside me without a word.

vvv 3rd POV~ Haku vvv

“Naruto-san, please. Yanagi-san and Zabuza-sama are waiting for us. Yanagi-san is already upset, let us not anger her more.” Haku asked as he caught up to Naruto. Naruto didn't slow down in his tree jumping though.

Naruto-san landed on a branch and was about to push off again when a barrage of kunai knives perforated the poor innocent tree limp. Naruto yelled in surprise then followed the trajectory to where Sasuke stood upside down on a branch twenty feet higher than Naruto's.

“Hey, what's the big idea?! Watch were you're throwing those things, teme!” Naruto shouted as he waved his fist around at his teammate. Haku resolutely decided that this was a team conflict and stayed silent. He had already witnessed the odd dynamics of the dysfunctional Team 7 and didn't wish to be sucked further in to their insanity.

Sasuke-san didn't sound very amused, “That's payback for not being a team player. You've wasted enough of our time already, let's head back. Yanagi-itoko is pissed.”

Naruto slumped a little and Haku was mildly surprised that he was already giving in. During one of the many dinners that Yanagi-san practically twisted arms, particularly Zabuza-sama's, to make sure everyone was present, Naruto-san had declared his own nindo way: that he would never give up no matter what. The way the preteen had said it made Haku think Naruto would never stop, not even for the most trivial matters.

“Okay, I get it.” Sasuke scoffed in victory, but it proved to be premature, “I will... right after I take care of my business!” Naruto-san exclaimed and leaped under Sasuke-san. Naruto patted his rear end in a very immature manner, “Like I'd ever take orders from you, bone-head!” He called to Sasuke, who looked a little bewildered.

Haku sighed when Sasuke-san shot after his teammate. He had planned to return to Zabuza-sama now that Yanagi-san had sent Sasuke-san after Naruto, but it looked to be he was going to have to go after them and act as the mediator between the two stubborn genin.

It didn't take long for the three of them to reach the little town where Gatou had been killed. Haku followed after the two younger boys from a short distance, just beyond hearing range. He had stopped for a moment earlier to put on his cracked pseudo hunter-nin mask to hid his burn scars and hadn't bothered to regain the distance it had cost him; he wasn't trying to stop Naruto like Sasuke-san was. Haku saw no need to since they were already in the town, it would just be better for all of them if Naruto-san finished his business and went back willingly. Why Sasuke didn't see that was beyond the Kiri nuke-nin.

There was a poof of smoke that indicated the use of a jutsu and Haku nearly fell off the roof when he saw that Naruto had transformed into a busty naked girl with only scant puffs of chakra smoke to cover her...

Haku blushed.

Yanagi-san had already exploited Haku's aversion to the awkward topic of women anatomy ever since she regained her ability to speak. Zabuza-sama had been no help at all since he found the whole thing amusing. Haku had a sneaking suspicion that Zabuza had intentionally told Yanagi about Haku's dislike of the topic to get back at him for ignoring his master those first three days when Yanagi-san had been unconscious. Haku would have probably continued avoiding Zabuza-sama if Yanagi hadn't, almost literally, bashed their heads together and flat out told them what the other was feelings about Haku's near death.

For such a surly woman, she did think of others... sometimes.

While Haku had been trying to collect his dazed thoughts, Sasuke-san thankfully broke the transformation jutsu and had tied Naruto-san up with ninja wire. Haku quickly leaped the rest of the way until he was crouching on the roof directly above the Konoha genin.

“Just give it up would you?” Sasuke-san asked in that emotionless, slightly condescending, voice he often used when around Naruto. Haku watched the Uchiha boy curiously. They were already in town, to drag Naruto-san back now would be just a waste of time. It was better to let the blonde boy get his coupon and head back, that way they killed two birds with one stone. Right?

Another voice spoke, “Hey! What are you two doing here?” The three boys looked at the speaker. Tazuna-san stood in front of Naruto, looking as if he were about to go on another journey, if the pack on his back was anything to go by. Now that the Great Naruto Bridge was finished, Tazuna would likely be raking in more commissions to build bridges, so it was no surprise to Haku. In fact, if Zabuza-sama decided to stay in the Land of Waves they would probably be escorting Tazuna-san around a lot. Kind of ironic, at least to Haku.

Naruto brightened at the sight of his team's former employer, “Tazuna-oji! Talk about perfect timing!” He tried to move, but Sasuke jerked on his 'leash', “Ya see I left something at your place.”

Tazuna-san leaned down so he was closer to Naruto's level, “Wait, let me guess. A little slip of paper?” Naruto nodded happily. “Inari-chan wanted to make sure you had so he ran off a little while ago to take it to you.” Haku mentally winced at that. If Inari-san caught up to the rest of their group, he would have to face Yanagi-san. During their time at Tazuna's house, Haku got the instinct impression that Inari was scared of Yanagi. Knowing the jounin, it probably wasn't unfounded.

Really, Yanagi-san was just like Zabuza-sama.

Haku leaped from the roof, surprising Tazuna-san, “Come on. Let us head back, Naruto-san. Maybe we'll come across Inari-san.” He suggested quietly. Naruto seemed to cheer up at the thought but Sasuke-san narrowed his dark eyes at Haku. Haku immediately backed away, he knew that Sasuke-san was touchy about the subject of his defeat and Haku had no intention on broaching the topic until Sasuke-san was more calm, if ever. Haku didn't like conflict of any kind, not even verbally.

After a few tense seconds of silence, Sasuke-san reached down and cut the ninja wire from Naruto. He turned away and stuffed his hands in his pockets, “Let's go.” He ordered flatly before walking back to the way they came. Naruto-san shot to his feet, dusting off his orange jumpsuit and ran off after his teammate, pausing just briefly to wave good-bye to Tazuna. Haku watched the two genin go with fatigue before tiredly wondering after them. In the scant three weeks he had known Team 7 he had already seen more drama than the entirety of his time with Zabuza-sama.

Haku seriously doubted he was going to survive the rest of the week with them.

“Inari! Hey Inari!” Naruto-san was calling as the three of them walked calmly back up the road that they were taking back to Konoha. Naruto was looking left and right, trying to peer into foliage for the little boy. Sasuke-san and Haku walked flanked him, Haku was trying to help Naruto look while Sasuke-san just walked with his hands folded behind his head, he apparently did not wish to help. Haku did not blame him though. Sasuke-san didn't seem like the person to help unless it benefited him. He acted like a true shinobi, unlike Haku who was too soft.

Naruto-san stopped and planted his fists on his hips, “Huh, I was sure Inari would be down this way...” He mumbled to himself. Haku startled when Naruto suddenly twisted around and pointed an accusing finger to the casual Sasuke-san leaning against a nearby tree. “Hey Sasuke! Get over here and help me look too, would ya?!”

Sasuke turned his nose in the air, “Listen, Inari when looking for you. This doesn't involve me.” He said with mild contempt. Haku tilted his head to look at the younger dark haired boy. He had often heard that teenagers were rebellious, but he never had been able to witness it himself since he was always around Zabuza-sama who avoided other kids like the plague. He wondered mildly if this was what those people meant.

Naruto gritted his teeth, “Ah c'mon! Whatever happened to teamwork, huh?!”

“That's the only reason I'm here with you now, show some gratitude, loser.”

Haku could hear Naruto's teeth gritting from a few feet away and he winced at the sound. “I'll. Show. You. Gratitude.” Naruto seethed as he stomped off into the woods, punctuating each word with a footstep.

Haku wanted to comment but felt that it wasn't his place. Besides, Sasuke-san did not seem to like him and Naruto-san didn't look to be in the mood to hear advice from anyone.

“Hey, where are you going?” Sasuke questioned as he watched his hot headed teammate stomp away.

“Shut up! I need to go take a leak!” Haku grimaced at Naruto's uncouth manner. It was at times like this that Naruto reminded Haku of the Demon Brothers Zabuza-sama employed. Haku rarely used the word 'dislike', but he did not like those chūnin nuke-nins that followed Zabuza-sama around like unwanted filth.

Naruto-san bent down to grab something and wondered aloud, “What's my ramen coupon doing out here?” That seemed to prick Sasuke's interest as the other boy came to look over Naruto's shoulder. Haku joined them a little later, but didn't get to close. He didn't feel like he belonged here, he almost felt like a babysitter really.

Sasuke jerked, seeing something that Haku could not, “Wait a second, look there.” He pointed to the forest floor in front of the duo. Haku looked over the boys' shoulder and saw many footprints in the area. Some big and some... childlike. It wasn't hard to figure out that Inari, and possibly a few friends, had been kidnapped.

Haku stepped up so he was Naruto's other side, “A fight. Likely a few thugs got a way and decided to take a cowards form of revenge.” He spoke for the first time since they had gone in search of Inari-san.

There was only a moment's warning before the clouds that had been looming in the sky all day broke and poured their load down on all three of the boys.

vvv Normal POV vvv

“Just in time.” I commented as we ducked under the tea shop awning just as the deluge began. I was glad, I didn't have to worry about my hair frizzing up any more than normal. It was bad enough that Naruto called me 'Frizzy-sensei' I didn't want to give anyone else a reason to call me that. The hostess smiled at the three of us and waved us to sit down on the long bench in front before she bowed to us and asked for our orders.

I rambled off mine and Hinata's, knowing that the little Hyuuga heiress probably wouldn't have it in her to speak up, and leaned back so Peaches could do the same; I was mildly astonished that he ordered water. When the old lady ducked back into the tiny shop, I turned to give Zabuza a look, “Are Kiri nin so obsessed with water they drink it everywhere?” I asked incredulously.

Peach-boy gave me a glare that could evaporate the rain water off my clothes, “No.”

I was not letting him get away with that for an answer. I didn't like talking to people much, but I hated awkward silenced even worse. “We're at a tea shop it's generally accepted that people drink tea here.” I pointed out slowly.

For a moment, I thought Zabuza might actually try and hit me. If he did, then Zabuza vs. Yanagi Round Three would commence. “I don't like tea.” He snapped. Seriously, this guy was never social unless Haku was around and even then it was still a 50/50 chance.

Now Hinata was giving Zabuza a look. People from Konoha practically lived on tea, especially those living in more traditional clans like Hinata and I. In Konoha, someone saying they didn't like tea was like Naruto suddenly declaring that he detested ramen and became a nuke-nin because the Hokage refused to outlaw it.

Peachy didn't miss our shared horrified looks. He glare turned defensive and he looked away with a harrumph, mumbling something about stewed leaf water and pesky women. I smirked.

Yanagi: 17 Zabuza: 12

Another costumer ducked under the tea shop awning and flapped their soaked leather coat out, spraying the three of us in a fine cold spray, but he didn't remove his hood. Suspicious. Zabuza released a hissed breath and glared at the newcomer out of the corner of his eye. I pretended to ignore them as the lady came out sporting trays with our orders and came to take the order of the new costumer. Hinata gingerly took her cup of hot tea while I popped a stick of sweet dango in my mouth. Even from only two seats away, I could barely hear the newcomer as they spoke with the hostess and that only raised my suspicions.

Without thinking about it, I nudged Zabuza and handed him his wimpy glass of water to excuse the action. In return he nodded in acknowledgment as he pulled down a few of his bandages to reveal his mouth and took a casual sip of water. The whole exchange was smooth and nothing was suspicious about it. Strange that only a month ago we were enemies and now we were working together as if we had been for years. But I guess being under the same roof for nearly three weeks did that to a group of enemies-turned-allies.

“So when do you think those brats will get back?” I asked, to keep in character. It would seem suspicious to the tea lady, and possibly the newcomer if he had been watching us before, if we all just fell silent.

Zabuza grunted and said nothing.

I rolled my eyes, and not for show either. This man was just as annoying as Obito-nii, only in the opposite way. “Might as well be talking to myself.” I grumbled and popped another dumpling in my mouth, taking all my anger out on it by chewing the poor thing. My anger only elevated when I saw Zabuza's smirk before he brought his water to his lips.

Soon the dango was all gone, eaten by myself really. Zabuza didn't like sweets apparently and Hinata said she wasn't hungry, though I suspected she only said that to please me. I would have forced her to eat one so she wouldn't be hungry, but decided against it to teach her another hidden lesson. Hinata needed to stop being a people pleaser, in the world of shinobi people would take advantage of her faster than she could blink. The Hyuuga needed to grow a little backbone and courage, otherwise everyone would walk over her more times than a welcome mat. I was sure her father already took advantage of her soft nature and it wouldn't be long before she broke if nothing was done.

The newcomer had yet to take his hood off. Zabuza and I had already written him off as an enemy, but now Hinata was starting to get the drift. Though she was a green genin and not all the confident, I knew that Hinata was the most observant on out of my trio of brats. Having grown up in the Hyuuga clan and having a functioning Byakugan, Hinata had an eye for detail. A Hyuuga could look at a scene for three seconds, without their Kekke Genkai activated, and rattle back immediately everything in perfect detail. There was a reason why they were the ones assigned the missions that entailed guarding someone or finding lost items. So it was no surprise to me when Hinata began stiffening. Hurriedly I nudged her in the side so not to alert the mystery man.

“Oi, wanna split a plate of dango? I'm still hungry, but I don't think I can eat all of it this time.” I said easily as I shot a warning look at my student. Hinata luckily caught on to it and nodded before looking down at her lap. Leaning back a little, I waved to the tea shop owner from the large window put behind the bench for that purpose. She nodded at me to show she acknowledged me and continued make the stranger's order.

vvv 3rd POV~Haku vvv

“Eh?! Inari did what?!” Naruto-san practically shrieked when Inari's friends told him what happened. Sasuke now looked concerned instead of indifferent about the whole thing. Though, Haku believed that Sasuke-san had been concerned ever since they found the signs of a fight, he was just showing that emotion now instead of suppressing it like he normally did.

Haku stepped in before Naruto-san could question the obviously traumatized kids further, “Naruto-san, we must go. I know these men, if they find Inari-san...” He trailed off, not wishing to go into detail. Not only were there young kids present, but Sasuke and Naruto were still younger than him and obviously fresh genin. He doubted they had witnessed the true horrors of reality yet. To them everything was still good versus bad; with the bad losing horribly and the good getting away with no permanent injuries.

Sasuke-san, however, seemed to have a notion of just how bad the situation was for he grabbed Naruto by the arm. “Go back and warn the town.” He ordered the kids before tugging his teammate along into a run. Haku zipped ahead of them. He had been trained as a hunter-nin before Zabuza-sama and he defected from Kirigakure, he was an expert tracker and following after thugs stupid enough to have marked a clear path with cuts in trees was probably the easiest thing he ever did.

It was quick work finding Inari-san in the river, struggling to make it to shore, and with Naruto-san's numerous shadow clones, it was even easier work to pull him out. Haku felt almost useless standing there next to a line of Narutos and watching as the main Naruto struggled to grab Inari-san's hand. As soon as he had him, Naruto leaped out of the water and set Inari down.

Immediately Haku scanned Inari-san for any obvious injures, but found none. The Kiri nuke-nin was confused, if Inari wasn't injured then why had he been in the river? He had thought that the thugs of Gatou had thrown him over a cliff to watch him drown, but by all appearances Inari looked as if he had jumped willingly.

Inari-san was staring at Naruto in a daze. He looked at Sasuke, then at Haku and finally back at Naruto, “Why are you here? How come?” He asked.

Naruto-san gave Inari his trademark, earsplitting grin, “How come? Cuz of you! You did an awesome job, your friends were able to escape and warn us what happened!”

“The guys are okay?” Inari asked, but before any of the boys could answer, the sound of many footsteps came from their right. All of them turned to see the remainder of Gatou's thugs, a very small remainder, trotting up with the two filthy right hand men of Gatou leading them. Haku narrowed his eyes behind his mask. He did not like those two for trying to kill Zabuza-sama when he was healing from his first fight with Yanagi-san. The only person he hated more than those two had been Gatou himself. And with Gatou out of the way...

If Haku liked killing, he might say he was eager to kill those two.

The crowd came to a stop and one of them, the taller tattooed leader with a cutting fetish accused, accused “You're the brats from the Hidden Leaf!”

The second leader, the one with the strange jacket and purple stripes under his eyes, yanked out his sword as if it were just a piece of metal and not an extension of his arm, “You've gotta lot of nerve coming back here.” Naruto and Sasuke-san both glared and tensed, ready for battle, but so far no one made a move. The two leaders hadn't seen how the battle of the bridge had turned out with Naruto-san creating thousands of shadow clones and the village showing up to take back their home; but the rest of the thugs had and they knew that Naruto wasn't just any ordinary kid.

“It's just two kids you guys, go get them!” The second leader shouted when none of his minions immediately ran forward. As if they had been the magic words, the crowd of thugs charged forwards with pathetic battle cries. Sasuke immediately grabbed Inari and jumped back. Haku was glad that Sasuke wouldn't let something like pride put someone else in danger. Until now, the ice user had been worried if that would be a major problem for someone as competitive as Sasuke-san.

Naruto scoffed, “So, you think you can out number me, do ya?” He asked rhetorically and made his strange hand sign. Multiple Narutos popped back into existence and Haku took a moment to admire the younger kid's stamina. Zabuza-sama had once told him that the shadow clone technique was very high in chakra requirement; that Naruto was able to use the Kagebushin Jutsu twice in so little time and still create more than thirty was something extraordinary.

Haku waited until Sasuke-san had Inari safely out of the way before joining the fight. Luckily by that time some of the Naruto clones had already been popped and so a nice smoke, much like the Hidden Mist Jutsu, permeated the area. Perfect. Pulling out senbon in each hand, Haku began dancing among the thugs, striking out like a snake and putting anyone he hit in a temporary death state. Even if these men had been willingly with Gatou and not just in it for the money like Zabuza-sama and Haku had been, Haku would not kill them unless they forced his hand.

Now that Zabuza-sama had given up on his dream and started a more peaceful one, Haku hoped he would never have to kill again.

vvv Normal POV vvv

I growled and gnashed my teeth, damn this rain! It was making everything cold and I hated the cold! “It's been hours since they went back, how long does it take for them to find one damn coupon?!” I hissed.

Peaches shrugged, “Haku will find it even if your pests can't.” Really? He was still doing the whole fangirling thing?

Ignoring his student posturing for now, I tugged at my ponytail and glared at the stranger still sitting at the end of the tea shop bench. I didn't care if it would alert him or not, I was pissed because he was here and I couldn't pop a shadow clone off to go see what the hell those trio of brats were doing.

Peach-boy landed an elbow in my ribs, making me grunt. He leaned over and hissed in my ear, “Don't do anything stupid.” Damn it, how did this guy get to be so good at reading my mind in the few weeks we hadn't been trying to kill each other? My own brother, who raised me, wasn't as good a mind reader as Peachy was.

“Elbow me again, Peach-boy, and I'll break your arm off and shove it up your ass.” I threatened. I heard Hinata whimper slightly behind me and shift away. I really didn't blame her. Hinata was a genin with two high classed jounin who weren't in a very good mood at all; one of which was an infamous nuke-nin who had only recently turned 'good' and the other was from an infamous clan known for their anger induced fights and rather horrifying genjutsu.

My comment finally seemed to get the stranger's attention, who had, until recently, seemed quite content to act as if we didn't exist. “Interesting...” He said lowly. Zabuza and I both whipped around to glare at him in sync. This was it, most likely the hooded stranger would attack and I could take my pent up anger out on him and bash his brains in. I almost shivered in excitement.

The hood turned a little, giving me the impression that the man might be looking at us out of the corner of his eye, “I thought you were a family, guess your not.”

Hinata eeped behind me while Peaches and I exchanged dry looks. How this idiot stranger came to such a conclusion, or how he proved himself wrong, I did not wish to know. At all. Ever. Seriously, all three of us were wearing our haiti-ate, of two different villages no less, and Zabuza was lugging around Kubikiribōchō on his back. All we lacked was a sign that said WE ARE SHINOBI AND WILL KICK YOUR ASS. How this idiot thought we might possibly be a family was beyond me. Of course, he could be trying to get a raise out of us. But even then it wouldn't work. Shinobi had control over their emotions, most of the time, and trying to make a ninja blush was about the hardest thing to do and the most clichéd.

“And I think you're an idiot, turns out I'm right.” I retorted. I was already irritated with my little brats and this never ending rain. Being associated to Peach-bastard in a positive manner was just the icing on the shit cake of my day. We could be out of the damn Wave Country already if Naruto hadn't gone after his damn ramen coupon!

I swear I was going to kill the brat with training when we got back to Konoha. He'd never ask for another mission like this ever again.

Unfortunately the hooded man seemed to find amusement in my statement and just laughed. My right eye started twitching then and I was contemplating bodily harm when the source of my ire finally decided to show their nasty little faces. I turned my glare on all three boys when they came up to the tea shop, completely soaked. Naruto and Sasuke paled while Haku stiffened. He might have paled too, but he was strangely wearing his mask. After we had first left the town, Haku had taken the mask off and hadn't put it back on since.

No matter, he was dead in a few minutes anyway.

I inspected the other two brats and found small scrapes and specks of blood on their clothing. I hung my head with a long suffering groan. Of course, they would get into some dramatic fight with random enemies. Team 7 was unlucky enough to land a falsely labeled A-rank mission on their first 'C-rank' mission, so why not add more drama to it already?!

Damn karma demons. Why was I the one stuck with the unluckiest team on earth?

Sasuke seemed to sense my exasperation for he opened his mouth, no doubt to report, but I just held up a hand, “I do not want to know. You little bastards are filling out your own paperwork this time.” I was not going to be doing paperwork over an extra mission that I didn't even participate in! Filling out paperwork on additional missions that didn't follow the primary objective were a pain in the ass to fill out, more so than normal.

Naruto and Sasuke shrunk back behind Haku, who seemed to be eying the hooded stranger still sitting quietly off to the side. Zabuza laid money down for our food, which was surprising because I was sure he'd make me pay for what Hinata and I ordered. Peach-boy had struck me to be a big penny-pincher; but I wasn't going to complain if he proved me wrong. More money for me.

Haku removed his mask to speak, but before a single syllable could leave his mouth, the stranger attacked. Immediately all of us reacted and reached for our nearest weapons, but didn't get the chance to attack. Mostly because we were all staring at the stranger hugging Haku. Not strangling. Not holding him hostage. Not even acting aggressive.

Hugging.

Zabuza and I exchanged confused looks. We had probably seen a lot of strange things in our careers, but a total stranger hugging a shinobi scarred by angry red burn marks had to be at least in the top five of most bizarre.

And yes, this incident beat the time I had to accompany a nobleman's daughter to a local bathhouse, as the 'friend of the day', only to have her almost abducted by her ex-sumo-wrestler ex-boyfriend. Somehow there was also a chicken involved.

“Oh you poor baby! Poor child! Who did this to you?” The man asked in an odd squeaky voice. His voice was still deep but it rose several octaves at the end of every sentence, almost as if he were talking in questions. Poor Haku looked bewildered and shot us pleading looks from his prison. I seriously doubted Obito, who was internationally known for his infiltration and evasion skills, could get out of that hug.

“Eh?! Just who are you?” Naruto shouted, pointing a finger at the stranger.

The man seemed to realize he had an audience, even the damn tea lady had come out of her shop to stare at him. He laughed sheepishly and put Haku back down on the ground, but didn't release the poor kid, “Oh... my name is Kurosawa Momoko.” The person pushed back their hood to reveal a pair of upturned eyes, much like Naruto's, and a mess of short chocolate brown hair. A scar, a nick really, slanted over Momoko's cheekbone and curved downwards towards his jaw like a sideways hook; that alone was enough to identify him as who he said he was.

I blinked, Zabuza facepalmed and Haku blanched under his burn marks. Team 7 looked between the three of us confused, not understanding anything going on but I couldn't blame their ignorance for that. They were fresh from the Academy and barely knew what a nuke-nin was. Kurosawa Momoko was an infamous mercenary who was responsible for the fall of some country no one remembered anymore more than a decade ago. He... She got her name 'Nariagari Naginata' for the legend of starting several civil wars by using only her naginata and pepper spray.

All for the fun of it.

“Last the rumors had it you were in Grass Country causing trouble.” I said dryly.

Momoko laughed and waved a hand, “I've retired from that business, dearie,” I twitched at the endearment, “there's no fun in it anymore. I got my fill of fighting, now I just wonder the world. I'm glad I did too! Cuz I wouldn't have met this cutie otherwise!” The older woman squeezed an extra ten years out of Haku.

Peach-boy wasn't looking amused, “Release him.” He snarled. I pursed my lips and wondered if I should stop Zabuza before he did anything rash. It wasn't like he couldn't handle himself against Momoko; for all her skill, she wasn't a ninja and was thus as a great disadvantage, but killing someone just because she was touching his student was a little... well, stupid. Not that I could really blame Peaches for being overprotective, I'll admit that I was slightly overprotective of Sasuke since he had almost died.

Momoko gave Zabuza a shit-eating grin that dared him to try something and my respect for her went up a little. Not many people could grin cheekily at a pissed off shinobi with a big ass sword and sharp, predatory teeth bared. “Sorry, hon, no can do.” From the look on Zabuza's face, I'd say he wasn't used to people telling him no.

Though I found the encounter amusing now that I knew that Momoko wouldn't be a threat to us, I was still frustrated. I wanted to go home not stand around in front of some random tea shop in Wave Country and watching an infamous mercenary butt heads with an equally infamous nuke-nin.

I snagged Naruto's collar and began dragging him away, “Duckass and Hinata, we're going. Those three can work their own problems out.” I ordered. I was so done with solving other people's problems, if I wasn't getting paid for it I wasn't going to lift a damn finger to help. My two slightly smarter students immediately fell in step behind me while Naruto struggled to break my grip on his jumpsuit, squawking with indignity.

An hour later when Zabuza and Haku finally caught up to us, neither looking remotely pleased with me, I noticed that Momoko was still firmly attached to Haku. That's when I started laughing and didn't stop until set up camp. Even then I would occasionally start snickering again whenever I glanced over at Ice Princess and his involuntarily new mercenary friend.

vvv

Our little motley group made it back to Konoha two days behind schedule, and thus earning me a rather stern lecture from the Hokage about picking up my brother's worst habits. Team 7 made our mission's report, as well as Sasuke and Naruto's side mission, then stepped aside and let Peach-boy and Ice Princess lay out a rough plan on what they intended to do now that they weren't 'bad guys' anymore. Apparently they were planning on using Gatou's money to start something like the Academy, to teach the younger generations how to protect themselves properly. The Land of Waves was no where near powerful or wealthy enough to be a shinobi nation, but they wouldn't be at the mercy of people like Gatou anymore.

Though half of his face was covered up again with bandages, I swore I could see Zabuza's eyes light up in surprise and respect for the Hokage when the old man suggested he meet with one of the Nara to discuss further development on the plans. Apparently that thing just wasn't done.

Welcome to Konoha, Peach-boy. And get used to our bizarre flavor of insanity.

As soon as both the verbal and written reports were done, which took two extra hours since I had to teach my brats the proper way to write a report, the six of us were released back into the dying sunlight and into Momoko's waiting arms–at least for Haku.

I, on the other hand, was apprehended by someone else entirely.

“Imoto!”

“Damn it, let go of me Nii-san, before I crack your skull open with a blunt spoon!”

Obito dropped me, knowing I would at least try to attempt my threat if I thought he didn't believe me. I landed in a pile at his feet and glared up at Nii-san from my spot on the ground. Obito grinned back, “I heard ya had fun. Oh, and Rin-chan as a few choice words for you when she sees you next.” I paled at that. Rin was probably the only medic I really trusted, but she took after Kushina and her hero, Senju Tsunade, too much. If she had somehow found out about the injuries I sustained during the mission...

I gulped. The only thing I feared the most was Rin when she was pissed off about my medical state.

Even Kakashi was scared of her then, and he feared nothing. Or so he said.

“Come on, Haku, we should get your burns looked at.” I started and reached out to grab Haku's arm. I was totally using the kid as a meat shield from Obito's kunoichi teammate.

Unfortunately Zabuza seemed to catch onto my plan and moved Haku, and by association Momoko, out of my reach. The glint in his eyes told me he meant to do it on purpose, and he fully intended to see me suffer. I was sorely tempted to sic my brother on him in retaliation.

“Oi! Who the hell are you?!” Obito barked when his attention was drawn to the two Kiri nuke-nins and one clingy retired mercenary.

Screw it, I was setting Nii-san on Zabuza anyway, just for the hell of it.

Flashing Zabuza a sneer, I turned to Obito, “Nii-san, this is Momochi Zabuza... and friends.” My brother's goofy aura that he seemed to always emanate faded and his dark gaze turned steely. I always loved watching people around my brother when he went from an idiot to the hardened war veteran he rarely showed. It was a sadistic joy, but I reveled in their looks of horror and fright. I snickered when my team and even Haku inched a little away from the older Uchiha. Zabuza and Momoko didn't look all that bothered though.

Now for the icing on the cake.

“And he's the one who injured me.” I added cheerfully, like the helpful little sister I was. Quickly, to be just as helpful, I turned to Zabuza and introduced my brother, just in case he didn't already know him, “Peaches, this is my Nii-san, Uchiha Obito. Internationally known as the Uchiha Phantom or the Ghost of Konoha.”

Wow, I never thought anyone could go white so fast.

Momoko was giving me a reassessing look, apparently she approved of my throwing Zabuza to the wolves. I only smirked at the older woman and winked. I fully intended to take responsibility for this. If there was one thing I wanted to see in my life it was Obito butting heads with Zabuza, even if I had to throw them at each other myself!

Unfortunately Kakashi had to ruin it all.

“Obito, Rin said that you're to drag Yanagi to her no matter what. Stop glaring at grouchy minnows and do what you're told before she turns her ire on you.” Kakashi commented drily as he popped into existence with the help of a white puff of cloud beside Obito, his standard perverted orange book in hand, “I'll take care of the pest.” He added belatedly and with much venom.

“Grouchy what?!”

Nii-san forgot his anger with Zabuza, or at least he ignored it, and snagged me by the arm. “Let's go imoto, before Rin-chan really gets pissed off.” I struggled in his grip, but there was no escaping an escape artist like him. It looked like I was resigned to the fate of being dragged away to meet my doom.

Just before Obito could walk away, Kakashi said nonchalantly, “By the way, she wanted to see Team 7 and Momochi's brat too.”

Yes! There was justice in the world!

Chapter 17: Welcome… Home?

Rin had generously decided to forgo trying to force me into a hospital and just told Obito to bring me, and by result everyone I had returned with, to Obito's and my house. Like my brother, I had a major phobia about hospitals more so than the normal shinobi, so Rin knew that the only way she could get me there was if Obito knocked me unconscious first. And I would not be happy if I woke up there. Our small entourage marched straight through the Uchiha entrance gates with suspicious looks from the guards. The three of us Uchiha weren't paid any mind, nor was Kakashi who was practically an Uchiha in all but name and looks; but Hinata, Naruto and Zabuza received the brunt of every Uchiha member's narrow gaze. Whenever I returned their glares tenfold each person quickly found something far more interesting than the Hyuuga heiress, the Kyuubi brat, and a famous nuke-nin walking around.

I was the only one who got to glare at them and get away with it!

I nearly cried in despair when I saw the crowd waiting around the house. Not only had Rin converged on the house, but Sasuke's entire family and Shisui as well. Itachi and Mikoto-oba I didn't mind, Fugaku could go to hell, and Shisui would most likely gang up on me with Zabuza if they were introduced.

Just end my misery now.

Rin descended on me before I could punch Nii-san for not warning me about my imminent doom, “Yanagi-chan! I've told you a million times, a million times, that your body can't withstand so much chakra exhaustion! You're going to kill yourself if you keep doing this!” For such a small woman, she had a large voice. No doubt earned from being the kunoichi teammate of two hardheaded stubborn mules commonly known as Kakashi and Obito. “And don't you dare tell me it's part of a shinobi's job like you did last time, this is the eighth mission where you suffered from it! I know you have above average chakra reserves, so how the hell do you manage eight missions in three months?! The expected amount for your chakra levels is only three missions in a year, a year do you hear me?! Not only that, but Obito-kun tells me you passed out from chakra exhaustion twice during your last mission! Well, what have you to say for yourself?!”

“Sorry mom.”

In a joint effort, I received three smacks upside the head from all members of Team Minato for my snide remark. I sighed under my breath and idly rubbed my abused head as Kakashi and Obito joined in Rin's lecturing. Sometimes I felt like I had three mothers instead of two brothers and their teammate, it was ridiculous when Team Minato teamed up on me. Most likely this would end with me having a head trauma, a result of the trio smacking me every time I said something snarky, and the three of them arguing with each other. It happened every time and it gave me the perfect chance to slip away though.

Luckily Fugaku wasn't in the mood to hear three idiots ganging up on a poor defenseless girl and snapped, “Enough.” Team Minato fell silent immediately, but all shot me looks that promised a continuation of the conversation when Fugaku wasn't there to ruin their fun.

Couldn't wait.

“Report, Yanagi.” Fugaku ordered me. I glared at my clan leader, not in the mood for niceties. Why the hell did I have to report?! Fugaku-sama already had my post-battle report and the Hokage would be sending him a copy of Team 7's debriefing since it concerned the Uchiha clan.

He wanted a report? Fine, I'd give him a report.

“Uchiha Sasuke went above the line of duty and protected his teammate, earning himself the hallowed kekke genkai of our glorious clan. Then he passed out from chakra exhaustion.” Oh, you could taste the sarcasm rolling off me in waves.

Zabuza shot me a subtle knowing look, of which Obito caught and reflected it back with a 'Big Brother Glare' probably thinking it meant something else. Okay so I was lying when I said that Sasuke passed out, but I was not telling the leader of the Uchiha clan, Sasuke's own damn father, that the person who had made an attempt on his youngest son's life was standing right beside the duckass boy. Especially not when the three strongest Uchiha in the clan were standing right there, one of which being Sasuke's overprotective brother. Haku wouldn't make it a step before he was put through the most horrifying genjutsu he could imagine, sliced into tiny pieces, and incinerated to the point that his ashes were microscopic.

And he thought I was terrifying.

Grabbing my brother by his flak jacket, I reached for the inside pocket and snagged myself a piece of candy before he could do anything. Obito squawked and tried to take the sweet back, but I evaded his hand and popped it into my mouth with a grin.

“Yanagi! That was mine, damn it! You have you're own.” Nii-san snapped at me.

I shrugged and said around the hard candy, “I'm pretty sure that brat Inari stole my candy stash I had on me. I need sugar before I go on a rampage.” I grimaced when I realized that the confectionery I had stolen was strawberry flavored, but I didn't dare spit it out no matter how much I disliked it. Obito would destroy me if I wasted candy, especially when it was his favorite flavor.

My brother scoffed at me, “You let your candy get stolen? By a kid?” Funny, coming from the guy who couldn't even stop me from stealing his candy in plain sight.

“Well you can't blame me, I can't really protect my stash when I'm unconscious.” Wrong thing to say, because that opened Lecture Yanagi About Chakra Exhaustion version 2; and this time Mikoto jumped in on the mothering too. I threw up my hands in defense and immediately started apologizing. I could get away with being surly when Team Minato lectured me, but I could never pull that shit with my aunt. Not without earning an earful from both her and Fugaku about respecting one's elders. I was really tempted to make the sign to ward off evil, but decided against it for the sake of keeping my head where it was.

vvv 3rd POV~ Sasuke vvv

Everyone else watched with varying levels of amusement as Yanagi-itoko began apologizing profusely once Kaa-chan joined Obito and his team in yelling at her. Sasuke felt very satisfied to see his sensei and cousin taken down from that high pedestal she put herself on, even if it was only for a moment.

Yanagi-sensei had been more bearable after Sasuke's brush with death, but only a little. She had gone from treating him like scum under her sandal to being slightly overprotective. Sasuke couldn't really blame her for that, she must have been feeling very guilty if it showed even the slightest. So he endured it as best he could, even if it annoyed him to no end. Kaa-chan and Itachi-nii already smothered him, and having Sasuke's normally grouchy sensei doing the same was irritating. He expected Yanagi to treat him like he was any other genin, it was a refreshing experience from his mother and brother's babying or his father's negligence. Still, Yanagi was very arrogant, and Sasuke didn't like that. So he thought she was getting what she deserved.

Shisui snorted from Itachi's side, “How long do you think it'll take before she's forgiven this time?” This time? Did this happen a lot? Sasuke hardly saw his two elusive cousins before Yanagi became his sensei. Honestly, he hadn't been able to recall their names at times. When Sasuke first asked his family why he never saw more of his cousins, they carefully changed the subject and he never thought of it again. He knew next to nothing about his cousins, Sasuke didn't even know if they were related to him on his mother or father's side! And he hated not knowing things.

“Hn. Two episodes of chakra exhaustion is enough to worry anyone. Even if they forgive Yanagi-san, I doubt Obito-san and his friends will ever let her live it down.” Itachi-nii said quietly while casting an expressionless look at Zabuza standing a little further away. Sasuke could see the gears turning in his brother's head. The navy-haired Uchiha had no doubt that his Nii-san was coming to very accurate conclusions about Zabuza and his hand in everything. He wasn't called the genius of his generation for nothing.

Shisui followed Itachi's gaze and grinned cheerfully at the grumpy nuke-nin, “Yo! Kiri nin, huh? Odd seeing one of you in Konoha. Did you have mission complications with Yagi-chan?” When Zabuza gave him a glare, Shisui's grin took on a devious twist, “Oh I see~! Let me warn you though, Obito-senpai is very overprotective about his little sister. He might actually try to kill you if you make a move on Yagi-chan.”

The revulsion in Zabuza's eyes amused Sasuke greatly. Sasuke had wondered if Zabuza was interested in Yanagi-sensei romantically. In fact both Team 7 and Haku had often discussed the possibility of their teachers being together, even Momoko seemed to agree that Yanagi and Zabuza liked each other. Not that they'd ever admit it.

“What was that?!” Obito's voice carried over from where he was cornering his sister.

Shisui actually cackled, loudly. “Once again, Obito-senpai's sonic hearing strikes! Better run, Kiri nin-san, Obito-senpai has a habit of attacking first and asking questions later... if you can still talk that is.”

Zabuza shot Shisui a nasty look and Naruto was staring at the goofy Uchiha in confusion, “Eh? Who are you?” The blonde idiot asked, rudely pointing a finger at the older Uchiha.

Itachi's best friend didn't take offense though, Sasuke would be genuinely surprised when Shisui did take offense over something. He was the most easy-going person he knew of, and Sasuke still couldn't believe that Shisui was the strongest in the clan! “Why, I'm the great Uchiha Shisui! Nice to meet ya, Naruto-kun!”

Naruto looked surprised that Shisui knew his name, but the young Uchiha boy wasn't paying attention to his teammate. He was more interested in how Zabuza stiffened up and stared at Shisui with an almost fearful look. Even the mercenary Momoko looked more alert now, her eyes sharpening over poor Haku's head as she continued to cling to him. It made Sasuke wonder just what Shisui did to earn his reputation as being the strongest Uchiha. Now that he had the sharingan, he could know the secret. That's what Yanagi-sensei had told him during their first team meeting.

“Damn it, Obito! I swear I'll kill you!” Yanagi suddenly snapped and everyone not part of that particular conversation turned to see Yanagi glaring harshly at her brother, who's expression was an odd one of smugness and annoyance.

“Oh really? And just how are you going to do that?” Obito asked sardonically. Beside him, Obito's teammates, whom Sasuke still didn't know the names of, rolled their eyes.

There was a long moment of silence as the two hot headed Uchiha glared at each other before Yanagi threw her head back and announced loudly, “I declare another Prank War on you, Uchiha Obito!” Every Uchiha in hearing range, even Itachi, choked. It had been almost four years since the last prank war, but Sasuke remembered it very clearly. It had been one of the few times he remembered that his cousins existed, mostly because their pranks had been leaking out and fooling other clan members. It had gotten bad enough that Tou-sama finally ordered both of them to stop under the threat of being kicked out of the Uchiha Compound for good.

Behind him, Sasuke heard Zabuza muttering under his breath, “That's our cue to leave” followed by Shisui's loud cheerfulness of, “Allow me to escort you out! The Uchiha guards can be a bit nasty if you leave alone.” Somehow Sasuke didn't think that Shisui was escorting the Kiri nuke-nins, and Momoko, out of the Compound by the kindness of his heart.

Sasuke debated if his parents would let him leave with Zabuza. He knew he was going to be in the crossfire between Yanagi and Obito when all hell broke loose and he wanted to get out while he still could.

vvv Normal POV vvv

While Nii-san was still stunned at my deceleration, I turned to his teammates, “Are you two staying for dinner?” I asked, a complete 180 from how I had been acting only a moment ago.

Rin and Kakashi, however, were used to my mood swings. Kakashi shrugged his assent while Rin shook her head, “Sorry, I have to go check that Kiri boy before they leave. I'm worried that that eye of his might be infected, has it been bloodshot ever since the fight?” I would always be amazed that even when Rin was in the middle of lecture me she would notice an injury on someone twenty feet away. Must be a medic intuition or something.

I nodded, not at all offended that she didn't trust my skill at medical ninjutsu. I didn't trust my skill at medical ninjutsu, I only learned it because Rin was determined that I had the basics down just in case. “Yes. I hit Haku with a fireball and that caused his capillaries in his eye to burst. You might want to check his chest too!” I told Rin as she took off. She waved her hand to show that she heard, already calling out Shisui's name.

Mikoto rolled her eyes at all of us and shook her head, “Well if we're done then I guess I should start dinner for my own family.” She turned that hard eyed 'mother' look on me and I had to suppress the shudder going up my spine, “Remember what I told you, Yanagi-chan.” She practically growled and I was once again reminded that my aunt used to be a very powerful jounin before she retired to raise her boys.

“Yes, ma'am.” I squeaked. The Uchiha matriarch smiled fondly at me and dipped her head in a good-bye before going to join her husband and sons. All four of the Main Branch family left quietly after that, and only Itachi-san bothered to say good-bye to his cousins. My eye twitched as I glared at Sasuke's retreating back.

Rude little brat.

Immediately after Fugaku was gone, Obito trapped me in a choke hold, “What the hell, ya little brat? Ya trying to get us killed by our uncle?! Don't you remember what happened last time?” My brother snapped at me.

I glared up at him, “It's your fault, you shouldn't have said what you did, bastard.” I snapped.

“Yeah, well I noticed you didn't deny it!”

“NO! I did not like Peach-boy in that way, you sick pervert! Keep you mind out of the gutter! Just because I act friendly with someone of the opposite sex does not mean I like them!” I snapped and dug my fingers in Obito's left side where an old injury slashed across his ribcage. My brother hissed in pain and released me.

I whirled on my two remaining genin, “Naruto! Hinata! Get cleaned up and stop gawking like idiots!” I barked. Both of them jolted and blinked at me dumbly. I rolled my eyes in exasperation and explained further, “Clean up for dinner, nitwits. Unless you have somewhere else to be, you're staying here for dinner.”

Naruto immediately started whining, “Eh?! But I was gonna go to Ichiraku Ramen for dinner! I went through all that trouble for the coupon and-”

Grabbing his earlobe, I yanked on it to shut the brat up, “Having ramen after a mission is not healthy. I'm not going to have the Hokage jumping down my throat later on in life because you die on a mission due to lack of nutrition. You're staying for dinner and that's final.” I snarled without any real anger in it. When I let go of Naruto's ear, he clasped his hands to the abused cartilage and danced around, howling in pain.

Hinata was pushing her forefingers together again and I reflexively swatted her hands down, “F-forgive me, Yanagi-sensei, but I… my Tou-sama… I mean…”

I rolled my eyes and waved her away, “I forget. Go on if your clan needs you.” Hinata gulped and made a quick bobbing bow before fleeing like the devil was on her heels. I watched her go and hoped that the entrance gate guards wouldn't give the Hyuuga girl any trouble. They were a real stickler about visitors, even to the point that visitors had to leave the Compound with an Uchiha escort so they weren't heckled.

Grabbing Naruto by the collar of his jumpsuit before he could sneak away, I marched into the house, past the squabble that had started between Kakashi and Obito-nii. Honestly, those two were just a grown up version of Sasuke and Naruto.

...Or was Sasuke and Naruto a younger version of my brothers?

I deposited Naruto on the common room couch, where I could keep and eye on him as I made dinner, with a warning not to break anything. The brat didn't move, other than to cross his arms and sulk. I said nothing as I went into the kitchen, the brat would eat whatever I cooked without complaining or I'd kick his ass tomorrow in training.

After the mess of the Wave mission, I came to the conclusion that it was best if I started taking Team 7's training seriously. I hadn't expected to run into the problem of an upgraded mission rank so soon, and if this bad luck continued I had no doubt it would happen again. It was better to over-train the brats and let them be bored out of their skulls with D-rank than to have them die on a mission they were ill prepared for.

“Damn it… where is that-!” I cut off with a yelp when a hand appeared over my shoulder, holding the chili powder I was looking for. I twisted around to find Kakashi-nii giving me his trademark eye smile. Cautiously I took the powder from my adoptive brother while giving him a wary look. Kakashi was a neutral party when it came to spats between Nii-san and I; while Rin normally took the side of whoever she thought was right, Kakashi took the side of whoever the hell he wanted to win. And that depended on who pissed him off the most. His loyalty often changed several times before the warring between Obito and I ended.

Needless to say I didn't really trust the Copy ninja much when it came to pranks.

Kakashi-nii went to the other side of the kitchen to stir the Miso soup. I watched him like a hawk, knowing this wasn't just about pranking my brother anymore. Kakashi tried to avoided my kitchen whenever possible because he claimed I was a slave driver to anyone who dared enter; but it was his last sanctuary from Obito and Gai since they never stepped foot in the room. The kitchen was my domain and I didn't like trespassers.

I knew exactly why Kakashi was in here, and it had nothing to do with Obito being an idiot.

I peeked out of the doorway to where Naruto was sitting. Obito had joined my blonde student on the couch and was listening to Minato's son as he talked animatedly, waving his hands in the air and imitating explosions–probably talking about the Wave mission. Unlike Kakashi, Obito seemed to be enjoying Naruto's company if his wide grin was anything to go by.

Looking back at Kakashi, I debated on saying anything. Minato-san's death was a touchy subject for any member of Team Minato, but it was a personal issue to Kakashi-nii. Kakashi had known Minato-san longer than Obito and Rin; and even though all three of them saw the blonde Yondaime as a father figure, it was Kakashi that Minato practically raised.

“So did you ever decide what to do with Netsui?” I asked casually as I returned to chopping vegetables. Even the most oblivious person could see the way Kakashi's shoulders relaxed at my question. I was sorely tempted to throw something at the silver haired jounin. I was rude and nosy with a penchant to collect blackmail whenever I could, true, but I wasn't dense like my brother was. I knew when some topics were touchy and best avoided at all costs; having quite a few subjects I liked to avoid myself.

Especially when the other person had a very nasty mean streak that rivaled mine and my brother's combined.

Kakashi hummed from his side of the small kitchen, “Yes. I gave him a trial run, which he passed. He starts training full time next week. Also,” Kakashi's voice turned a little colder, “why didn't you tell me that his twin sister was a fangirl? She wouldn't stop yapping about Sasuke-kun when I took her to Rin.” He hissed at me.

I laughed, “Oh did I forget to mention that part?” I asked in false surprise then laughed even louder when Kakashi glared at me.

“What did Rin-chan do to you to piss you off?”

“Nothing. Really, it's more like what Nerai did to me. We know how Rin is when she's annoyed.”

Kakashi-nii grimaced, probably remembering a few such instances. While both men on Team Minato had more leeway than most people when it came to Rin, she could only take so much of their incessant bickering before she started smashing heads together. Hard.

I waved Kakashi away before he could say anything else, “If you're going to be in here, then set the table. And make sure you wipe it down before you do anything! I know how you and my brother are!” Obito and Kakashi were notorious for setting the table without cleaning it first. I always cringed at the thought of eating at a dirty table, but everyone always told me it was just my clean freak showing. I always responded by telling them to go to hell. It was my kitchen and my table. If they wanted to eat my food then they better listen to what I told them to do, damn it!

“Ugh! No, I'm not eating it!” Naruto whined half an hour later after I finally managed to wrangle my student and Obito into the kitchen to sit down and eat. Already I was regretting letting those two idiots be friends instead of hating each other. All they did was just bounce their idiocy off each other until it was unbearable. I had to actually threaten Kakashi with blackmail so he wouldn't leave me alone with Idiot One and Two.

Needless to say he wasn't very happy with me.

I laid my hands flat on the table and towered over the blonde brat, “Listen here, Dumbass, you're going to eat what I cooked or you can starve.”

“Ha! You can't stop me from eating when I leave! I can easily go home and eat ramen!”

“Don't think I won't burn your ramen stash; and I am perfectly willing to blackmail Teuchi-san into banning you from his ramen stand. You can ask Kakashi and Obito how far I'm willing to go to get my way. Eat your vegetables, idiot, or starve.”

“You're not my mom!”

My eye twitched. This brat was really trying my patience, “No, but I am your sensei and legal guardian. If I say jump, you say-”

Naruto cut me off, “Wait, really?”

I blinked momentarily in confusion, thinking he was answering me. When I saw that odd look of eagerness and hope in the brat's bright blue eyes I understood what he was asking. This was Naruto I was talking to, someone who had only been treated with disdain and neglect throughout of his childhood. Underneath that loudmouth idiocy facade he had, Naruto was really just a lost little kid who wanted a family.

Rolling my eyes, I sat back down with a scoff, “Duh. Did you even read the Shinobi Handbook? Law is that orphaned genin are automatically wards of their jounin sensei until they turn sixteen or become chūnin. Even if they have relatives, it's overlooked to prevent confusion and unnecessary conflict. The only exception is if the genin is part of a clan, and then they just become wards to the clan leader.” Like Nii-san and I had been when our parents died. But both Rin and Kakashi had been legally considered Minato and Kushina's wards. Technically, Kakashi, Rin and I all had joint custody over Naruto; as well as his godfather Jiraiya wherever the hell that pervert was at the moment.

If a fight about guardianship ever broke out over Naruto, I had a feeling that all of Konoha would eventually be dragged into it.

There was a silence over the table as Naruto stared at me in astonishment and slight awe, which made me very uncomfortable. I wasn't a very affectionate person, and while I enjoyed glances of wonder because the person thought I was amazing, I did not like being stared at. I glared at him, “Shut up and eat your stir fry.”

Naruto pouted.

“Get used to it, gaki. This is the way my imoto shows affection,” Obito snorted. I glared at my brother but said nothing as he took a large bite of his oyakodon Donburi, his favorite food. Immediately Nii-san spat it back out and lunged for his water glass, draining the whole thing in one fell swoop.

Obito was a wimp when it came to spicy foods.

“YANAGI!!!” My brother roared and I took that as my cue to flee the scene until further notice. It might be best if I begged someone for a place to sleep for the night.

The Prank War had started.

vvv

“Alright, bratlings, time to get serious.” I said the moment the last member of my students, Hinata surprisingly, appeared the next day. I felt an odd mixture of pride and annoyance when all three of them went white as a sheet.

...Maybe I was being too harsh on them...

Naw.

I held up one bell, “If you get this bell by lunch I won't use you as training dummies for the rest of the day and I won't request the Retrieve Tora mission for a month.” I was going to pull a classic Team 7 Sensei maneuver, minus the hidden teamwork message since I didn't have time for that bullshit. After all, what was this generation's Team 7 if I didn't force them to do the bell test at least once in their lives? I had never personally experienced it, but I knew enough from when Nii-san complained about it.

Needless to say I had their undivided attention now. My grin turned a smidgen more evil as I added, “and you better came at me with the intent to kill, because I'm not going to hold back.” Cue the 'oh shit' looks on my cute little genin's faces. “Ready… Go!”

They lasted ten minutes.

I casually eyed the slightly ruffled training ground with mild distaste. When Nii-san and I spared, on the rare occasion that we weren't at each other's throats long enough to have a friendly spare, there would be at least a tree or two uprooted and several burn marks. When Kakashi-nii joined us, Fugaku was forced to reconstruct the demolished training grounds. And he was never happy about it.

But we were never as destructive as Itachi-san and Shisui. Fugaku actually banned the two from sparing in the Uchiha Compound.

There wasn't even a broken tree limp from Team 7's rather pathetic attempt at fighting. It was a wonder how they had survived the Wave mission. I pinned each genin with a glare. “Up. Again.” I barked and fell back into stance. Naruto wasn't the only one to groan as they climbed to their feet.

By noon I still hadn't broken a sweat and the brats still didn't get close to the bell. And that was only because Sasuke and Naruto somehow got it into their heads that this exercise was no longer about teamwork but a pissing contest between two idiots. Even Hinata was starting to get frustrated with the two of them when I called time.

I was irritated enough by then that I bashed the boys' heads together hard to get them to shut up, “If I have to beat this stubbornness out of you I will,” I snarled, “even if I have to tie you together!” Both boys winced in horror at the thought. Maybe it would scare them into working together finally.

Turning to Hinata, I opened my mouth to tell her how she failed the exercise and noticed her wide lavender eyes filling with horror. I grinned, sometimes it was just fun to traumatize kids. Not because they needed to face reality or because it was an accident, but it was just so damn fun-

It was hard to describe what happened next. One moment I was smirking evilly down at the shy little kunoichi and the next I was wet, as in soaked to the bone. And not only that, I was cold. If I wasn't mistaken there was an ice cube sliding down the back of my shirt, along my spine.

I fucking hated the cold.

Turning around slowly I pinned my grinning brother with a deadly look. On either side of Obito, Naruto and Sasuke looked both horrified and amused at the same time. So they were in on it then. “...Obito...” I hissed through my chattering teeth. Steam rolled off my as the water evaporated quickly under my spiking fire aligned chakra.

Nii-san cackled something about revenge best served cold and chucked the bucket he had used at my head before poofing away. Only a shadow clone then.

But I was certain Sasuke and Naruto weren't clones. They might not be the instigator, but they would do in a pinch until I got my hands on that bastard.

VVV^^^OMAKE^^^VVV

Deadly Reputation

vvv 3rd Person vvv

“We don't need your help.” Zabuza snapped as the woman who had been yelling at Yanagi checked Haku's eye. The poor boy stood there awkwardly, trying not to blink as the stranger stared intently at his bloodshot eye.

Rin ignored the grouchy man's comment as she produced a scroll from her weapons pouch. She handed it to the boy with a smile, “Apply this salve to your burns twice a day. The ingredients are listed on the scroll so you can make your own once you run out. And don't worry about your eye, it'll heal on it's own!” Haku blinked at the kind woman, he wasn't used to people giving him something with no strings attached.

An arm snaked around Haku's shoulders and the ice user stiffened when he saw the owner of the arm was none other than the famous Shunshin no Shisui. Zabuza-sama had told Haku many stories of the Uchiha who made Ao, one of the best hunter-nins in Kirigakure, turn tail and run with little effort. Shisui was herald as being the Master of Genjutsu, praised even by his own clansmen. Haku didn't feel very safe with one of the strongest shinobi in Konoha standing right next to him.

“Don't worry, Rin-san! My buddy Haku-kun will be fine, you can go back to yelling at Yagi-chan if you want.” Shisui said with a cheerful wink. Rin rolled her eyes at the goofy Uchiha as she left the foreign shinobi with Shisui. He reminded her so much of Obito before the war changed him. While her teammate hadn't changed too much there were times, Rin noticed, when he would grow quiet and stare off into the distance, probably remembering whatever had happened to him during the time he was thought to be dead.

Zabuza growled at Shisui for his familiarity, but didn't dare say a word. As infamous as he was to Kiri nins, there was little to nothing known about Shunshin no Shisui; other than his ruthless genjutsu and his frightful speed. Kiri shinobi were naturally fast, probably the fastest of the five nations after Kumo, and masters of stealth; but Uchiha Shisui had no problem catching any Mist shinobi that crossed his path. Zabuza didn't know how the Uchiha would react if he snapped at him. After dealing with Yanagi, who would react with harsh violence and an explosion of insults that made Zabuza want to blush, he was leery.

Shisui chose to ignore the former member of the famed Seven Swordsmen and kept his arm wrapped firmly around the awkward teenager's shoulders. Haku reminded Shisui so much of when Itachi was his age, so awkward and formal that it almost hurt. The Uchiha eyed the nuke-nin inconspicuously. Shisui knew from the moment he spotted the bandaged nin that he was none other than Momochi Zabuza, wielder of the Kubikiribōchō and known for having attempted a coup in Kirigakure. But Shisui didn't let on he knew; in his experience nuke-nin, especially those from Kiri, were a little touchy when it came to their missing status.

Shisui had enough scars to prove their oversensitivity on the matter.

“So Haku-chan, got a girl waiting for ya? Or did the lovely Yagi-chan scare her away?” Shisui inquired. Haku blinked in confusion, he didn't know anyone named 'Yagi'; the only name that came close was Yanagi and she- Oh.

“No, Uchiha-sama.”

Shisui made a peculiar noise in the back of his throat, something that sounded like a gag and a croak. “What's with all the formality? Oi! Do I look like Fugaku-sama to you? It's Shisui, just Shisui. I'm too young to be a '-sama', even a '-san'. Why, I'm younger than Zabuza-san!”

Zabuza pinned the Uchiha with a look. He didn't know how Shisui knew who they were, he even knew Haku's name and Zabuza had made sure not to let Haku's name slip out in the bingo books, but Zabuza wasn't all that surprised. Uchiha Shisui was a prodigy, not one of the average Uchiha prodigies like Yanagi was, but a genius that was on par with Uchiha Itachi, the famed Genius of his generation.

By then, the little group had reached the Uchiha Compound entrance. Shisui waved happily to the Uchiha guards, who dipped their heads in acknowledgment. Shisui pulled a face and leaned in close to Haku, whispering, “I even bribe them with sugar and they still do that.” Haku's mouth twitched a little in amusement. In the month he and Zabuza-sama knew Yanagi they learned one very important fact: no matter how powerful, violent, grouchy, or arrogant any Uchiha was, they all had one thing in common and that was a sweet tooth.

With the exception of the oddball Sasuke.

Zabuza twitched in irritation when Shisui made no move to let go of Haku, or to leave them. Even Momoko was starting to get annoyed as the Uchiha continued to bother them. They both tried to keep it to themselves, due to their protective instincts over Haku. It was no accident that Shisui had chosen Haku to bother. Shisui had seen the adults' parental instinct over the fifteen year old the moment he saw Yanagi leading her little parade to her house, no matter how miniscule it was. Every little twitch they made was in preparation to protect Haku from any potential threats. That was why Shisui flung his arm over the boy's shoulders. If the nuke-nin or mercenary made a move against Konoha, Haku would be dead before the first civilian casualty.

Uchiha Shisui was a cheerful soul, but even he was not above murdering someone to protect his home, even if that someone was a teenaged boy with no heart to fight.

“Hey hey hey! You know, Momoko-san, you should take Haku-kun with you! Haku's gonna need some help fending off the ladies when he gets back. I don't think even Zabuza-san can help!” Shisui chirped cheerfully as he finally let go of Haku when they reached Konoha's main entrance. He pretended not to notice how the nuke-nin or mercenary's shoulders drooped every so slightly now that Haku was out of danger.

Momoko pretended to consider the Uchiha's offer, even though she had planned on it anyway. “You're right, I think I will!” She, at least, could pretend that the goofy Uchiha in front of her wasn't someone that could murder her in a blink of an eye.

Zabuza sputtered, “What?! No! Haku is staying with me!”

“Then you can both stay with me.”

Haku blanched white, causing his burn marks to stand out even more than they already did, “Ano… why?”

Momoko flashed him a smile that could rival Naruto's, “Because you're the cutest little thing! I've always wanted a kid like you, Ku-chan!”

Shisui choked on his laughter at the nickname, but composed himself so he could speak, “Great! The three of you can be one big happy family!” He ended with a cheesy thousand-watt smile.

Zabuza glared at the man, he had given up any notion that Shisui wasn't anything other than a goofy man who had a frightening reputation. Zabuza would even go so far as to question if Ao was hallucinating when he said it was Uchiha Shisui that made him run and not some other Uchiha that no one knew about. Even the Ghost of Konoha, Uchiha Obito, while as goofy as Shisui, was also known for being vindictive and slightly arrogant. Shisui was just… ridiculous. “Tch. Idiot.” Zabuza muttered under his breath.

He spoke too soon.

Shisui grinned even wider until his cheeks hurt, having heard the nuke-nin, “Unless your invited by the Hokage, please don't come back. Not everyone is as forgiving as Yagi-chan,” Shisui's smile slowly died and he stared at the three of them for the first time with a serious expression, “especially when their precious people are injured by you.” Shisui finished and pinned his sharp gaze on Zabuza. Obito-senpai had told Shisui what exactly the nuke-nin had done to Yanagi, and he would never forgive him for that.

Quickly as his glare appeared, Shisui replaced it with another smile before cheerfully wishing the three of them a safe journey and shunshined back into Konoha, leaving the three of them staring at the small puff of dust disturbed by his quick use of Shunshin no Jutsu.

Shisui returned to the Compound quickly, a smile on his face and happily greeting his clansmen with ease. He was Shunshin no Shisui and he protected Konoha from the shadows, even behind the shadow of a smile and veiled threats. He would never let anyone befall harm if he could allow it, especially those he considered closest to him.

#Script's Archives #sensei fanfic #naruto fanfiction #fanfiction

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evil-overlord-scriptology · 5 years ago

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But I Don’t Want to be a Sensei! Pt 4 (ARCHIVED)

Chapters 14 & 15

Chapter 14: Round 2 with Peach-boy

I nudged Naruto's side with the toe of my sandal. He didn't even twitch. Squatting down I poked the brat's cheek with a rigid finger, “Hey, dumbass...” I said loudly, knowing that a knucklehead like Naruto would react if I called him names. He still didn't move. “Obito Mini-me. Brat. Idiot. Dumb blonde. Dead last. Coward.” When the brat didn't react at all I stood back up with a sigh and turned to the others standing in the doorway.

“Well either he's dead or out like a light post.” I told them, scratching the back of my head. Hinata gasped a little, her hands going to her mouth as she no doubt thought that her precious 'Naruto-kun' was dead.

Tsunami looked as equally worried as the little Hyuuga heiress, “You don't think he overdid it in training, do you? He was looking pretty exhausted last night.

“Hn. He was passed out in the forest yesterday morning.” Sasuke commented thoughtfully.

I groaned and hung my head, I really didn't need this at the moment, “Fine, Sasuke will be on guard duty today and Hinata will train.” I said defeated. I hated it when people screwed up my schedule! “Hinata you know the rules. If anyone suspicious shows up, head for the bridge and warn everyone.”

“H-Hai.”

Sasuke frowned, “But that was the rotation yesterday.” I glared at him. Like I didn't know that already, idiot.

“Hinata still needs to train in her stealth and since Naruto is stealing your rest day, you can take his spot on guard duty. Don't complain, Duckass, true shinobi don't protest orders.” Like I predicted, Sasuke snapped his jaw shut and didn't make another sound.

Really, it was insulting how predictable that kid was.

“Look, if it makes you feel better, I'll go with you that way you can relax at the bridge.” Everyone but Inari gave me strange looks. I returned their gaze with an unamused look, “Stop staring like calves at a new gate. I'm bored.” I snapped, perhaps just a little too defensively. By Sasuke's sudden smug look I was guessing he knew why I really was going.

I was worried about the brat.

With good reason though. There was no such thing as a jounin who didn't have a sixth sense for danger; and I felt more jittery than when Obito accidentally released those rabid squirrels in the house.

I mentally shuddered at the memory.

I moved past the miniature crowd and lead them outside. Turning to Tsunami I began issuing orders, “When Naruto wakes up, just tell him to practice his taijutsu; you also have permission to send him on any errands you have. Hinata, I want you to try and sneak up on as many woodland creatures as you can. If you catch five animals in a row then join Sasuke and I on the bridge. Duckass, Grandpa Dunk, let's go.” I turned on my heel and immediately started for the bridge without waiting for the two idiot males catch up to me.

“Geez, for a woman you walk pretty fast.” Tazuna panted when he and my cousin finally caught up. It was really pathetic that we were almost to the bridge by that point.

I gave the old drunk an unimpressed look, “Not all women are geishas or civilians who don't have anywhere important to be. The success of a mission could rely on fast feet, I could possibly save a life that would otherwise be lost if I arrive quicker than my enemies anticipate.”

Tazuna pulled a face, “Hey kid, are all shinobi like this one or is it just her?” He asked Sasuke.

Sasuke just shrugged and didn't comment. He practically had to jog to keep up with us adults; I couldn't tell if he wasn't answering because he didn't want to or because he was too focused on not falling behind. I was guessing it was a little bit of both.

“Tazuna, how long do you have before the bridge is finished?” I asked the old man. Now wasn't the time for fun and games. That sense of dread I had been feeling all morning was getting worse the closer we got to the bridge.

Grandpa Drunk shrugged, “Depends. If I have a full roster of workers, it should only be a few weeks. But with Gatou controlling everything and scaring the people, I keep losing my workers. Just yesterday I had one of my foremen quiet! I don't even have half of a roster now, it could take months with the amount of workers I got.”

Grimacing, I halted at the entrance to the bridge, “That's what I feared.” I muttered.

Tazuna gaped at his unconscious employees littering the bridge. I could tell by their chakra levels that the men were still alive, but only just. “What tha-?!” Tazuna exclaimed, his face twitching in horror. I glanced at him then at Sasuke. Sasuke looked back at me, his eyes gleaming with an odd shine of excitement. He was ready.

A sudden mist blew in from the ocean. I snarled in frustration and stepped in front of Tazuna, “Stay behind me.” I said sharply. Tazuna didn't say anything, but he didn't move.

That stupid creepy chuckle drifted out from the fog, “Sorry to keep you waiting, Uchiha. I see you still got that brat with you, but what happened with the other two? Did they run off?” I heard a slight clicking behind me, but didn't glance towards my cousin. I knew he wasn't doing something stupid. Of all my genin I trusted Sasuke the most in a fight, even if he had bouts of cowardice when I least expected it.

Peaches chuckled again, “Oh look, he's shaking again. Pathetic.” The nuke-nin laughed mockingly.

There was a small intake of air from Sasuke and I felt Zabuza's chakra spike as water clones surrounded the three of us. I tensed and palmed a kunai, ready to throw it at the clone's head that was in front of me if he so much as blinked in a way I didn't like.

Sasuke scoffed, “I'm trembling with... excitement.”

The Zabuza water clones seemed surprised at the admission and I only rolled my eyes. Why couldn't the need for dramatics skip Sasuke? It skipped Itachi and me, why not one more generation?! I had enough drama from Naruto, I didn't need Sasuke filling in for that little brat too.

Speaking of brats...

I glanced at my cousin out of the corner of my eye, “Play nice.” I said teasingly. That was all the permission Sasuke needed. He twirled the kunai in his hand around a finger so that the blade was pointing at the clone in front of him. With a delightful smirk that reminded me a little too much of Obito's sadistic grin, my baby cousin pounced at the water clones.

While Peach-boy's clones were busy trying to defeat an Uchiha brat, I ran through the signs for a summoning and slammed my hand to the bridge's surface, “Kuchiyose no Jutsu!” I heard Zabuza growl angrily as a swarm of normal sized hawks flew up from the seal, spiraling into a twister of feathers and harsh cries that surrounded me like a moving wall. I held up my right arm and one of the hawks detached itself from it's flock. “Fly to Hyuuga Hinata and inform her to come as back up.” The hawk dipped its head at my command and took off to the sky, flying out of sight before turning in the direction of Hinata. No need to tell our enemies where an ally was after all. The rest of the hawks dispersed among the cables of the bridge, their sharp yellow eyes watching.

While I was busy with my summonings, Sasuke finished up his little spar with the water clones. He looked about as cocky as a true Uchiha when he returned to his spot beside me. I mentally whimpered and hoped that I didn't get an arrogant little brat who thought he was God's gift to man. If so, I was going to beat that out of him and suffer Itachi's wrath with a smile on my face.

“Ooooo, the brat's improving.” Peach-boy said from my right. All three of us turned to see the man with horrible fashion sense giving us a leer. At least I thought it was a leer, it was kind of hard to tell when the lower half of his face was bandaged up. His ally stood beside him, still wearing that false hunter-nin mask. “Looks like you've got competition... Haku.” Zabuza continued.

“So it seems.” The boy, Haku, murmured quietly.

Trolling time.

“Oi oi. Peachy's ally, or whatever the hell your name is, are you a boy or a girl? Because honestly, you're a very androgynous individual.” I asked, intentionally playing the ignorant idiot. Tazuna and Sasuke were giving me looks that could only be described as 'way to ruin the suspense, dummy'.

Haku and Zabuza exchanged looks and I took my chance to continue, “You know what? It doesn't matter anyway, I think I'll just call you Zabuza's Bitch.” I said with a smirk. Both nuke-nins snapped their heads around to glare at me–well I assume Haku glared, it was hard to tell with the mask–while I cackled in delight of pissing my enemy off.

“Take care of the brat. I'll take the bitch.” Zabuza growled.

Haku turned his gaze on Sasuke, “Right.” The kid murmured again. Then he moved. Startled I opened my mouth to shout a warning to Sasuke, but Zabuza was on me before I could utter a single syllable.

I back flipped away from Tazuna, distancing myself from the client and the man trying to kill him. At the moment Zabuza seemed pretty focused on me, so I didn't have to worry. I smirked as I kicked Kubikiribōchō away from me. “Don't tell me I struck a nerve.” I cooed as I deflected another swing with my kunai. Zabuza snarled like an angry animal and charged at me again. I snorted and ducked under his swing. If I had know pissing Peaches off would make him attack like a predictable wild animal, I would have done it a long time ago.

Kicking off the ground, I gave myself enough time to spare a glance at Sasuke. My eyes widened as I saw Haku performing hand signs with only one hand. That wasn't something you saw everyday. I wonder if the sharingan could somehow pick it up.

Before I could activate my sharingan to see if I could, Zabuza attacked again, “You're opponent is me! Let's leave the kids to their game.”

I shot Zabuza a nasty glare, “Oh, go drown in your own water ninjutsu! I didn't come all this way with a bunch of brats and a drunk old man to hear you blowing steam, ya old windbag.” I snapped, getting irritated. I knew Zabuza wasn't taking this fight seriously. He was just trying to keep me from Sasuke and Haku's fight.

Peachy paused, “A bunch of brats, eh?” He quoted, sounding oddly interested. “So you don't think that those genin are worth anything either.”

“Oh I think they're worth a lot of things, I just like calling them brats. They're my brats and I'm the only one allowed to call them that and get away with it.” I snapped back and flung my kunai at Peachy-boy's head to emphasize my point. He easily ducked under the kunai and charged at me, his sword back and ready for a strong strike to my legs. I leaped into the air over his blade and put my hands down on Zabuza's back, flipping over him to land between him and the kids.

I smirked, “Ya know, some people would think you were compensating for something with that big blade of yours.” I commented sweetly.

“You're letting that big mouth get away again, Uchiha.” Peachy growled.

I shrugged, “Well at least I'm not trying to prank you as well as fight you like my brother does. That's just annoying.” I said coolly. From the look in Zabuza's eyes, he thought my inappropriate remarks were a hell of a lot more annoying.

“Argh!” Both of us whipped around to see Sasuke kicking Haku away.

Sasuke stood in his spot, smirking, “Seems you're not as fast as you think you are.” He said, idly spinning his kunai around his index finger. Cocky little git, I was definitely beating that arrogance out of his system.

Zabuza glared at his ally, “Haku. Stop messing around and letting a brat beat you, get on with it!” He ordered.

The masked boy stood back up easily, “Yes.” He responded in an almost robotic voice.

Frowning I turned my back on Zabuza to watch what the masked brat was doing. Icy blue strands of chakra haloed Haku and he bowed his head, “I'm sorry it's come to this.” The boy said softly and made a strange sign. The temperature dropped drastically and I uttered a curse under my breath as I automatically regulated my chakra to keep myself warm. Of course our newest enemy would have some kind of tie to cold weather. It wouldn't be hell if he didn't.

Stupid karma demons and their stupid agenda against me.

The water around Sasuke and Haku suddenly leaped up into the air to form flat frozen surfaces. Haku stepped into the mirrors, senbon needles in his hands. Meanwhile I gaped in surprise, it was not cold enough to form ice like that. Even the most powerful shinobi with water nature had a hard time creating ice even in temperatures where it was easy to form. That only meant one thing.

Kekke Genkai.

Peaches chuckled behind me, “Seems you figured it out.”

Growling I ran for the ice mirrors, but Peach-boy flash stepped in front of me. “If you're going to fight, you will fight me.” He snapped.

I glared at him. “Bastard.” I spat out.

The peachy nuke-nin chuckled creepily, “Oh? Out of your witty comments? I'm crushed.” I could practically taste the sarcasm in the air.

“You have three seconds to step aside before I really crush you.”

“How cute. You think you can defeat me. You weren't able to before, what makes you think you can now that we're surrounded by even more water than before?” My eyes widened a fraction and I flung my kunai at the water clone that I thought was Zabuza and leaping away before the real Zabuza could cut me down. He didn't look all that happy when he turned to face me. He scoffed when he saw my sharingan, “That again? Are all the Uchiha so weak that they rely on that silly Kekke Genkai of theirs? How pathetic.”

Sasuke yelped and I looked over Peaches shoulder to see Haku raining senbon down on my cousin like a vengeful thunderstorm. Anger washed over me, hot and heady, when I landed my gaze back on Zabuza. “Two seconds to move.”

Peaches sneered.

“One.”

He didn't move.

I held my right arm above my head and brought my left to my mouth. Curling my index and thumb around my tongue I whistled loudly, using a small wind ninjutsu to amplify the sound. My hawk summons, having been sitting on the sidelines forgotten, all took flight. They flew in circles like a roiling thundercloud of brown and black, using my upraised arm as the pivot point.

“Last chance to move.” I said. Zabuza stubbornly stayed where he was. My mouth twisted in an ugly grimace and I lowered my right arm to point at the Mist nuke-nin. The hawks gave one last turn before following my finger and shooting straight towards Peach-boy.

He smirked.

My eyes widened.

“Hha!” I felt water douse my back and I spun around to see Hinata standing in a puddle of water, formerly a water clone, panting slightly. She gave me a shaky grin, “I-I'm sorry Y-Yanagi-sensei. I c-came as fast as I c-c-c-could.” She stuttered slightly, a blush forming on her cheeks. I didn't blame her, Hinata had suddenly become the center of attention after pulling a stunt like that. Even Haku stopped torturing my poor cousin to stare at her.

I grinned, “Hey, I'm not complaining. You just saved me from being skewered like a roast pig.” I joked before turning serious, “Guard Tazuna, don't leave his side for any reason.” I ordered. Hinata gave a firm nod and leaped sideways until she was in front of Tazuna, in a Gentle Fist stance. When I turned to face Zabuza again, he did not look amused.

“Oh... did she ruin your little scheme?” I asked innocently, pressing an index finger to the corner of my mouth like a slut trying to act cute.

That did it, I could practically hear Peachy's patience snap. He snarled and charged at me, “Shut up!”

I laughed as I jumped away from him, “Looks like you underestimated my brats, Peach-boy. Sasuke and Hinata are clan kids and having been training with their families since they could hold a kunai right.” I ducked under Peachy's swing and shot my left leg out for a round house kick. Zabuza launched into the air to avoid my leg and I pulled back before he could land on it. “Sasuke is the best in his class and no one can defeat Hinata in taijutsu. She's a Hyuuga after all, it's in her blood.” I taunted as I back flipped away from the Kubikiribōchō.

Skidding to a halt a few feet away from Peaches I smirked, “And what have you got? A coward with a nice Kekke Genkai. Well, I've got two brats with Kekke Genkai and neither of them are cowards!”

Zabuza's face twisted unpleasantly, “Haku, stop goofing around and kill that pest!” He barked out, his gaze darting over his shoulder to where the ice mirrors stood. Haku didn't respond, but only started throwing more senbons at Sasuke at a more rapid pace than before; I tried not to flinch when I heard Sasuke cry out. Peachy looked back at me, his gaze deadlier than before, “That big mouth of yours is going to get your brats killed, Uchiha.”

I only smiled, “I'm confident they can handle one little brat, even one as powerful as yours. Besides, you forgot something.” Peach-boy stiffened as it dawned on him that Naruto had yet to appear. My smile twisted into a sneer, “You know, I think my last student deserves to be called the 'Stupidly Brave Shinobi of Konoha' more than I do. After all, not many genin are brave enough to fight someone like you, Peach-boy, let alone get the better of you.”

As if planned there was a puff of smoke to the right of Haku's mirrors. Naruto's voice drifted from the white billowing vapors, “I resent that, Frizzy-sensei! Call me the 'Fearless Shinobi of Konoha'! That's right, Uzumaki Naruto is here!” My eye only twitched a little at the nickname. I'd let it slide this one time.

Peach-boy blinked slowly at Naruto then looked at me, “You think some brat like him can do anything?”

I shrugged, “Why not? It was a dead-last like Naruto who helped turn the last shinobi war back in Konoha's favor.” I responded coolly. I should know, Obito was the idiot I was talking about. “I feel Naruto can do the same with this little spat we have. Dead-last shinobi have a tendency to surprise people.” Naruto took a second to gawk at me, not use to my free praise. All I could say was he had better back up my claims or I was going to murder the little sucker.

Naruto got a really big grin on his face, “You know how the hero always shows up at the last minute and kicks butt? Well that's what I'm going to do, right now! So don't you worry sensei, you can just sit back and watch me beat these guys!”

I facepalmed.

The blonde idiot ignored me, “Alright, you're history!” He formed a sign, “Shadow Clone Jutsu!” But before Naruto could form a single clone, Zabuza twisted around and threw a handful of shuriken at him. Like with the Demon Brothers, Naruto's first reaction was the freeze in fear.

“Move Naruto!” I yelled, my heart in my throat as I watched the throwing stars head for my frozen student. I wouldn't be able to get there in time to stop them, not even my hawks surrounding the bridge would be able to grab the shuriken in time.

Out of no where, senbon needles collided with the shuriken and knocked them off course. I jerked in surprise and twisted to stare at Haku half leaning out of his mirrors, still in the position of someone who had just thrown something. Zabuza narrowed his eyes at his ally.

Now that he was out of danger, I felt it safe to yell at Naruto, “You imbecile! This is a real battle not a stupid spar; a shinobi's lifestyle is deception, not a damn talent show! Always keep your enemy guessing, be unpredictable so they can't figure out how to defeat you. So get your head outta your ass and think before someone makes a dartboard out of you!”

Naruto turned about as red as Hinata did when Naruto got within ten feet of her. He started yelling apologies, but I ignored him to glance at Haku. Everyone else seemed to think that Haku had thrown senbon at Naruto at the same time Zabuza did and their attacks ended up colliding; but I knew better. One look at my cousin-turned-porcupine told me that Haku did not miss his targets. Which could only mean... he meant to throw those shuriken off track.

The question was why.

Peach-boy seemed to be thinking the same thing I was, “Haku, what are you doing?” Peachy demanded. His tone was dangerous and angry, he was pissed at Haku for disturbing his attack. In Zabuza's state of mind at the moment, I wouldn't be entirely surprised if he attacked his own ally out of anger.

One could only hope.

Haku straightened out of his position and dipped his head towards Peaches, “Zabuza-sama, let me fight this boy in my own way... please.” The brat rasped. Mildly I wondered if all Kiri nins had that smoker rasp, or if it was just these two idiots.

Naruto glared at the masked boy, “Bring. It. On.” He challenged before I could tell him to not be stupid. I suppressed the urge to hang my head in defeat at the stupidity of the blonde brat and wondered if he knew how powerful Haku was. Sasuke was hardly a match for the nuke-nin, what chance did Naruto have against him?!

Zabuza chuckled, “As usual you're too soft, Haku. Fine, if that is what you wish.” Soft? What part of that masked brat was...

I glanced at Sasuke. He was injured but not too bad, nothing that would cause any lasting damage. So either Haku was very sadistic and liked to play with his enemies; or he was soft as Zabuza said and wasn't trying to hurt Sasuke, just stall him. Still, knowing Naruto, he'd piss Haku off enough that the nuke-nin would tear him to shreds. I started to take a step forward to intervene before things got worse, but Peaches blocked my path.

“Don't even think about it.” Oddly enough, Peachy sounded amused. “You know what will happen if you take on Haku. I'll go after the bridge builder and that little girl.” I stiffened and looked to the left where Tazuna and Hinata stood. There was no way that I would be able to end Haku and protect those two at the same time. Against a long sword like the Kubikiribōchō, Hinata's taijutsu was useless; and without me guiding my hawk summons they couldn't do shit but sit there and look pretty. I supposed I could summon a larger hawk to deal with Zabuza while I took out Haku, but that would cut down on my chakra and possibly put me in a dangerous position.

Damn.

Zabuza seemed to know I was in a bind, he smirked underneath those bandages, “Relax, Uchiha. Lets see how our students do... one on one.” I gave him an Uchiha Glare, but he wasn't even paying attention to me. I didn't dare attack, he might not be looking at me, but I know the Peach Bastard was still prepared to fight me. Only an idiot would think otherwise.

Apparently Sasuke was an idiot.

While Haku was talking to Naruto, a kunai came flying out of the ice prison that held Sasuke. Haku easily dodged the knife and looked at my cousin, “Don't think I forgot about you, not for an instant.” The masked nuke-nin tilted his head a little, “Some warriors accept defeat gracefully, they know when they are beaten...” Oh great, know I was going to have two idiots who couldn't think straight, “Others do not. So be it, let us finish our battle then.”

I couldn't help but groan quietly as Haku reentered his mirrors. Zabuza actually snorted and gave me an amused look as if we weren't enemies fighting to the death but two people just watching our students spar. I shot him a brief glare and looked away. I refused to think Peaches was anyone else but my enemy.

It was torture having to watch my cousin practically being torn to shreds by multiple attacks coming from all the mirrors. With my sharingan I could pick up the real Haku and how he jumped from mirror to mirror to keep the element of surprise. The little pest was fast, even with my sharingan I could just barely pick up his movements as he flashed between the mirrors. But I still didn't know how the mirrors worked.

“Sasuke, Naruto think! You have to attack the mirrors from the inside and outside at the same time to figure out how they work!” I yelled. Naruto's face brightened with an idea and there was a poof and...

He was gone.

It was only when Sasuke started yelling did I realize where he went. My eye twitched and I glanced at Zabuza. The nuke-nin looked like he was on the verge of laughing, I was almost tempted to tell him that I was disowning Naruto as my student after a stunt like that.

“Katon: Phoenix Sage Jutsu!” Sasuke yelled out and there was a brief glow of orange that surrounded the multiple mirrors at various angles, but none of them melted.

I could hear the amusement in Haku's voice when he said, “You'll need more firepower than that to melt this ice.” I stiffened slightly. More firepower? I could easily do that, but...

Peaches smirked at me, easily reading my mind, “If you melt the mirrors you'll incinerate your students. Doesn't that defeat the purpose?” He asked. I shot him a nasty look and mildly wondered why he hadn't attacked yet. Peach-boy didn't have a problem earlier, was he just stalling then to get to this point and showcase his student? He had been hired to take out my client, not show off his student's prowess.

Once again my suspicions of his involvement with the Mist Rebels surfaced. I eyed the man, trying to figure out his game. I doubted that he was ever fighting me seriously. All he had done was send water clones and swing that big ass sword around. Zabuza had been part of the Seven Swordsmen of Kirigakure, he had gotten the position by being a master of kenjutsu. So far Zabuza had been attacking as if the Kubikiribōchō was just a piece of metal to be swung around and not a great sword.

Of course it was always possible that he was downplaying his abilities to keep the element of surprise; I had been doing the same by only dodging Zabuza's sword and tossing kunai around when I got the opening. But it just didn't fit Peachy's personality to use deception when he had the opportunity to strike. I glanced at the ice prison as Haku bounded from mirror to mirror, raining senbon down on Sasuke and Naruto. Haku was the same. I knew that that jutsu was meant to trap and destroy an opponent. The positioning of the mirrors and the pure speed of Haku proved that point easily enough. So why weren't my students dead yet? From what I had gathered on Haku, I knew he wasn't the sick twisted kind of shinobi that enjoyed toying with their victims. Not even Zabuza was that way. Zabuza's way of killing was quick, painless, and silent; leaving any survivors baffled and frightened of the Demon of the Mist.

Naruto's yelling stopped my musing, “I won't quit! Not ever, I'm going to survive and become Hokage because that is my dream!” I didn't know if I should be proud that he still wasn't giving up even after that downpour of needles or still embarrassed that he had gotten himself into that mess.

What Haku responded with surprised me, “I didn't want to be a shinobi, it's painful. I don't want to kill you, but if you come closer I will have no choice.” What? “I will kill the kindness in my own heart and fully embrace the shinobi way. This bridge will the battlefield where our dreams collide. I will fight for my dream, just as you fight for yours. Please do not blame me, I fight for someone who is precious to me. I live for him and I will face death for him so that his dream will become reality. That is my dream, and for the sake of that dream, if I must I will act as a shinobi and take your lives!”

I bowed my head and glanced at the silent Zabuza. It was obvious that Haku was referring to Peach-boy, but why? What did Zabuza do that made the kid so loyal to him? And furthermore, just what was Zabuza's dream? The more I listened to Haku, the more reluctant I was to kill the kid, but if he got in the way of my mission then I would cut him and Zabuza down.

Peaches shot me a haughty glance, “Tell me Uchiha, does that wimpy village of yours still avoid the most important rule of being a shinobi?” He asked as if he were genuinely curious.

I only started at him in silence. It was a loaded question, so I saw no need in wasting my breath with an answer that was already obvious.

Peach-boy cackled like a madman, “I wonder what your precious little Hokage will say when you come back with two bodies instead of three live genin... if you survive that is.” I heard Tazuna inhale sharply as it dawned on him just how outnumbered the genin truly were. I glanced out of the corner of my eye to see how Hinata was holding up to the news of her possible death.

Not too well.

Zabuza followed my gaze, “She's going to faint.” He observed in a tone that could only be amusement. He looked back at me, “How is it that you ended up with three incompetent brats? You're supposed to be an A-class kunoichi, and yet here you are... babysitting.”

“Hn.” I grunted. That insult was so pathetic I knew I would lose brain cells just by answering it. One would think that the Bloody Mist would pencil in a trash talk class right after their academy students learned how to gut a helpless victim. At least so they wouldn't kill their opponents from the lame insults flying around.

Unless... that was their stupid plan all along.

The damn man didn't shut up though, “Falling back on the Uchiha customary response? How unlike you.” Great now he was adding sarcasm to the list. My eye twitched and I came close to planting my fist in his stupid, bandaged face if only to shut him up; but I somehow refrained... for now. “It must goad you that your precious Hokage would dump a bunch of brats on you. It's such a waste of your skills, chasing after three brats like you're their nanny while shinobi weaker than you take over your missions.” Peachy continued on, not even bothering to see if he was really insulting me or not.

Finally I got fed up, “Your insults are pathetic. Even my pacifist cousin can talk trash better than you.” I deadpanned. Peachy didn't even have the decency to look offended. He only smirked at me from underneath his bandages.

I reached into my weapons pouch and brought out a fan. Snapping it open I began lightly fanning myself like a geisha would. I even fluttered my eyelashes at Peaches, “Let's get this over with, ne? I want to leave by dusk.” I simpered like a primping airhead and reactivated my sharingan, having had deactivated it once I realized I would never figure out Haku's jutsu with my eyes.

Zabuza jerked his gaze away from my sharingan and he reached back into his own kunai pouch. As he charged at me, I made a sweeping motion with my arm so that my fan cut through the air like a blade. When he came into my range, I thumbed the little lever on the handle and fourteen senbon needles shot out of the fan's ribs. Unfortunately due to the large curve of the fan's edge, only five senbons were heading directly at Peaches. He easily knocked them away with his two bladed kunai and jumped back.

I snapped the fan shut and pointed it at him, “Lesson number one of kunoichi tactics: Everything can be a weapon.” I depressed another button on the bamboo frame of the fan and a three inch blade shot out of the little slot that was embedded into the fan, just to prove my point. Zabuza did not looked very pleased with my Fan of Wonders–as Obito called it.

In fact, I could swear he was pouting.

“This won't be like last time, Peach-boy.” I promised him, my smirk melting away to be replaced with the expressionless mask every shinobi seemed to have.

The bandaged nuke-nin seemed to have stolen my smirk, “You're correct, because this time even if you do defeat me, you have no chance against Haku. When I found him he was just a street rat, but I trained him in the most advanced techniques. I taught him everything I know, and with that Kekke Genkai of his, soon he was able to take on dangerous enemies. Even outnumbered and in total darkness, he could strike with perfect accuracy. He cared nothing for his own life, or the lives of others. Haku became a unique fighting machine, a shinobi. In the end even he surpassed me, with that Kekke Genkai of his nothing can defeat it! I've created a tool that can destroy anyone who stands in my way, unlike those useless brats that follow you around like little lost puppies!”

I grimaced in disgust at the man before me. Then I glanced over his shoulder at the prison of ice mirrors where the shouts of pain from Naruto and Sasuke were still originating. When I head heard Haku's speech I was ready to put an end to the battle peacefully, just to save the kid the pain of losing his precious person. Now I was ready to roast the fool who dared take advantage of loyalty like that.

Zabuza laughed as he looked back at the ice mirrors with a crazed look in his eyes, “You think those punks can defeat Haku? He's the ultimate battle tool of destruction!”

“Would ya shut up already? Geez you sound worse than my uncle when he's talking about Itachi!” I snapped, getting irritated with this 'Haku is so great! You can never defeat him!' bullshit. Was Zabuza Haku's fangirl or senpai?!

Zabuza didn't understand the reference, so he wasn't offended. Though I had now doubt he would be throwing a temper tantrum if he knew how Fugaku was when he was bragging about my cousin. “Fine, but there is one more thing you should know.” I raised an eyebrow and decided to humor him, not that he needed any encouragement, “Did you really think our last battle was just win or lose? Haku had been watching the whole time, watching every move your made with that sharingan of yours. Haku can see a move once and immediately devise a counterattack; it's one of his... gifts. I've been waiting to see the look on your pretty face when you realize that your sharingan has become worthless!”

I kept my face blank just to annoy him.

Zabuza held up two fingers, “Suiton: Hidden Mist Jutsu!”

Deja vu, anyone?

The thin mist that had already layered the air thickened to the point of no visibility. I cursed, my sharingan eyes darting to pick up the slighted movement in the mist; but all I could see was Hinata and Tazuna fidgeting around, looking left and right for a thin spot in the thick mist. I pinned Hinata with a look. She was twitching nervously and shaking in fear, “Hinata, stay with Tazuna. Don't leave his side for any reason.” I ordered her in a sharp tone. The Hyuuga girl seemed to get over her fear at the order and nodded firmly before shifting from an offensive to a defensive taijutsu stance. I had noticed over the weeks that she seemed to lose her cowardice when given a direct order. Hopefully she would stand by it even if I went down.

Shuriken came out of no where and I easily batted them away with my closed fan. I took a cautious step in the direction the throwing stars had come from but stopped and twisted around when I felt Zabuza's chakra behind me. I blinked when I saw that his eyes were closed. Was he trying to prevent looking into my sharingan or was it another reason entirely? I frowned when he started to speak.

“Next time you see me, will be the last time you see anything.” Okay, for Peach-boy, that wasn't a half bad attempt to be intimidating; but still... even goofy Shisui still beat him by a mile. Of course, goofy Shisui happened to be pretty terrifying when someone did the impossible and actually pissed him off, but that was irrelevant. “Without your sharingan, you're nothing.” Zabuza rasped and then disappeared again before I could attack. I twitched in annoyance. If this was just going to be a hit-and-run tactic I was going to murder someone.

Preferably Peaches; but I would take Tazuna for putting me in this mess in the first place too.

Fine. If he wanted to play this game, then I would just pull and Uchiha Tactic straight from the Book of Bullshit and own his sorry ass before he could sneeze. I ran through the appropriate hand signs and slammed my palms together with a loud clap, “Fūton: Gale Palm!” In a large ejection of wind oriented chakra, I managed to disperse most of the mist thinning it out enough that I could see Zabuza's faint outline several paces to my right. I turned to face the outline and began a new set of hand signs, “Katon: Great Fireball Jutsu!” I shouted and sent a steady stream of fire at Zabuza.

I grinned when Zabuza had to leap out of the mist and into my sight, just like I wanted, “I'm sorry, I didn't catch that last part. You left to quickly. Something about me being without my sharingan...?” I said teasingly. Boy, did Peaches look pissed off.

Somehow that set off a monologue of how Peach-boy had figured out the secret behind the sharingan. I almost started nodding off when he started explaining the piercing eye and the hypnotic eye and how I had used them in battle. Seriously, what was with this guy and explaining things to invisible audiences? Was he so enamored with his own smoker voice that he liked making long winded speeches over obvious things?!

That would explain a lot of things, actually.

After he finished lecturing me about things I had grown up knowing, he started talking about his 'ultimate plan to win the day'. Finally I gave up pretending to listen and groaned loudly, “Oh. My. Kami. SHUT UP! At least try to make it harder on me by not explaining your stupid little plan. Dear Lord, do I need to give you the 'a shinobi's lifestyle is deception' lecture I gave Naruto too?!”

There was a beat of silence when even Haku stopped fighting Naruto and Sasuke, before Zabuza's annoying raspy voice spoke again, “Fine. I just won't give you a sporting chance.” If that was what he called a 'sporting chance' I would gladly go without, if only to keep my ears from bleeding.

In the back of my mind I wondered who could out talk the other: the Hokage or Peaches.

The fighting between the three boys resumed with vigor, but something was different about it. I could hear Sasuke using the fireball jutsu as well, which was strange. Didn't he already try to melt the ice and figure out that it didn't work? What could those two idiots possibly be up to? I risked a glance in their direction, hoping that it might shed some light on their plan.

“Pay attention to your own fight!” Zabuza roared and I snapped my head around with a gasp just in time to feel his foot connect with my jawline. There was a dull crunch and I tasted the sharp coppery twang of blood flooding my mouth; seconds later a wave of pain bloomed from my jaw, momentarily causing my mind to blank. I landed in a heap on the ground, my jaw throbbing painfully. I reached up to cradle it and winced when my hand grazed against the bruising area. The bone was cracked at the very least.

High killer intent brought my head up and my eyes widened when I saw Zabuza descending from the air, the Kubikiribōchō raised over his head and positioned to bisect me at the waist. Scrambling, I twisted to the side and got my feet under me just as the long blade dug into the ground almost three inches deep. I winced and tried not to imagine what would have happened to be had I been any slower.

I was really starting to regret pissing Peaches off.

The Kiri nuke-nin yanked his big ass sword out of the ground and turned towards me, a deranged look in his eyes. “Seems I finally succeeded in shutting up the Uchiha with the runaway mouth. Now to make it permanent.” I couldn't help but roll my eyes at the lame trash talk. This guy was truly pathetic when it came to being intimidating. I was starting to think that awkward Iruka could be more terrifying than this guy. The chunnin might be terrifying to kids, but he was just a socially awkward wimp when it came to adults.

Peachy disappeared.

I stiffened and looked around, trying to discern any chakra signal with either my sharingan or my sensory abilities. I swallowed a mouthful of blood, trying not to gag at the overbearing taste of copper, and ran through my options. While the wind jutsu had momentarily cleared the mist, it was back in full force, once again hindering my line of vision. Sight was out, I could deal with that. Peaches was a master of the silent killing technique; he could enter a crowd full of people, kill one person, and be gone before that person even hit the ground–all the while not making a smidgen of noise. That mean I could not hear Zabuza's attacks either and if I did it was probably a distraction. Still I could manage without hearing too.

That left my sensing abilities and scent. I wasn't a tracker and I was no where near as good at olfactory perception as Kakashi or the Inuzuka clan, but I still had a sharp nose. However, the problem with that was my sense of smell was being overridden by the smell of my blood still filling my mouth. My chances of predicting Peaches next attack were starting to slim down. My chakra sensing abilities weren't the best, it was mostly just raw talent, but I still should be able to pick out Zabuza's large chakra source in the thick mist he had created. It would be like trying to pick out the early morning sun in a thick fog, but it was still doable. Unless Peach-boy suppressed his chakra, I should be able to sense him.

I closed my eyes and concentrated on spanning my awareness about the bridge. I could feel the chakra of the three boys flitting around inside the ice prison, which appeared to be a thin dome of Haku's chakra, and I could pick out Hinata's still relatively high chakra reserves right in front of Tazuna's stunted civilian level chakra. Wait.

Hinata.

Damn it! I had a Hyuuga with me the whole time and I was too caught up in my ego to even think about asking her for help. There wasn't anything that could hide from the Byakugan! And now, I couldn't talk because of my cracked jawbone. Growling deep in my throat I was about to shunshin to Hinata and signal what I needed in my rusty genin hand signs, when the object I was looking for appeared.

Right where I didn't want it.

Chapter 15: Not Everything is Black and White

Hinata screamed.

I gasped as a sheering pain ripped across my chest; blood from my mouth dripped down my chin and joined the splatter of blood already on the ground. I was extremely lucky to have been able to shunshin right where I needed to be in order to take the blow meant for Hinata and Tazuna.

I reached up to cradle my wound, trying to stop the blood flow, and glared at Zabuza with slow spinning red eyes. Unfortunately he didn't meet my gaze, “Too bad, Uchiha, you let concern for those brats cloud your mind and adding further to the fog that already hinders your sharingan. You're eyes are sharp, but not sharp enough to read my moves.”

Kami above, why did I have to be injured and listen to Peach Bastard's shitty insults?

Peach-boy cackled in a cliché villainous pitch, furthering my annoyance with the man. Did Kirigakure hand pamphlets out on how to be a lame antagonist?! “Come on, Uchiha, I want this to be fun!” Can anyone say psychopath? “I want to enjoy myself while I extract my revenge! As for those pest... don't worry. They're at Haku's mercy, no they're breathing their last breaths right now.” Peaches twisted Kubikiribōchō so that the sharp edge of the blade was facing up and he reached behind him into his weapons pouch. I didn't move. “Relax. You'll have plenty of time to weep out an apology when you see them in the next life.”

Where the hell did he get the assumption I was tense in anyway?

He started cackling again. My eyes narrowed slightly as he seemed to dissolve back into the mist surrounding us. Peachy's crazed laughter drifted so that it sounded like it was coming from all around us. There was a moment of silence after Zabuza's awful guffawing faded away filled only with my labored breath. Damn this stupid wound, I was going to be in pain every time I got dressed for a month! Not to mention my bruising jaw; I'm not going to be able to eat solid foods for a long time. Plus when Obito sees it, there would be hell to pay.

Exactly who would pay... that was the question.

Because I was going to make damn sure that Peaches didn't leave this bridge alive.

Hinata whimpered behind me and I glanced over my shoulder to see her staring intensively at the ice prison. “N-Naruto-kun... Sasuke-san...” She whispered and took an instinctive step towards the place where her team was fighting for their lives. Hinata stopped and her breath started to shorten with panic, in another moment she would start hyperventilating and I couldn't do shit about it. The one time I wanted to comfort my student and my damn jaw was locked up from the pain.

Luckily Tazuna stepped in, “Don't worry, Hinata-chan. I have faith that the boys will pull through. That blonde kid... I thought he was just some goofy little brat with the maturity of a two year old. And the one with the attitude, I didn't think he cared about anyone! But I see now that I was wrong. All of you aren't what I expected and, by golly, I know Naruto and Sasuke will beat that masked pest to a pulp!”

My sharingan eyes darted to Tazuna to convey my silent thanks. The old man smirked at me and reached out to place a hand on Hinata's shoulder. The Hyuuga heiress was looking more confident than she had been, she stood straighter and held the kunai in a tight, firm grip.

I returned my gaze forward again and I was surprised to see Zabuza's outline among the fog. Maybe he hadn't disappeared as completely as I had thought. Peach-boy laughed sardonically, “You think those punks can defeat Haku? No one has ever stopped his secret jutsu.” Zabuza reached up for Kubikiribōchō and I clinched my fists, wishing that I hadn't lost my grip on my fan when Peaches landed that damn round house kick on my face. I was down to the senbons I had carved out of twigs earlier that week. Against the Kubikiribōchō, they wouldn't do squat. Mentally I ran through my other options.

When I realized my opponent was Zabuza, I had raided my pack until I managed to dig up my old, worn, and very out-of-date copy of Konoha's Bingo Book. While the brats were out training, I had been cooped up in the room I shared with Hinata, pouring over Zabuza's page. What I had read made me frustrated and ecstatic at the same time. Peach-boy's stats were solid straight across–practically invincible–except for one little detail. Zabuza was below average in genjutsu. As an Uchiha, I was fairly good at genjutsu, but I wasn't the best. Furthermore, Zabuza would be avoiding looking into my eyes which hindered my chance of catching only him in a genjutsu. My best chance was casting an area of effect genjutsu, but that would also endanger my team and Tazuna.

My other option was that I could also use my hawk summonings that still perched around the bridge, waiting for me to order them around. The downside to that option was that I had to focus my attention on directing the hawks, those small summons couldn't fight by themselves very well as they would attack anyone who wasn't me. I would have to concentrate on making sure none of the hawks went after Team 7. That meant that Zabuza, or even Haku, could bypass me and go for the bridge builder. I supposed I could create a shadow clone to handle the hawks, but I was already low on chakra and that would only eat away at my stores even more. I knew that if this fight was prolonged any longer I would suffer from chakra exhaustion again or worse.

I needed to end this now.

My hands rose and I started going through the hand signs for my signature technique, water ninjutsu be damned, when a spike of chakra made me freeze in utter fear. Hot, cold, anger, red... red... red. That chakra...

vvv FLASHBACK vvv

“Stay with your cousin, Itachi. I'll be right back.” Mikoto-oba called as she dashed off. I stared wide eyed and frightened as my aunt left. Alarms had awoken me in the middle of the night calling for an extreme state of emergency. Obito-nii was in my room only seconds after the alarm started wailing and dragged me to the Main Branch house, telling me to stay with Mikoto. When I tried to tell him that I was a genin now and I could help with whatever the crisis was, Obito had gotten uncharacteristically serious and ordered me to stay in the house.

Now the bells were calling for all shinobi ranked above chūnin, retired or otherwise, and Mikoto had left me in charge of my cousins while she ran to respond to the summons.

Itachi and I sat on the porch, watching ghostly red ribbons float through the sky, and keeping an ear trained on any changes in the constant alarm. Sasuke thankfully was being relatively quite, I wasn't having to try and listen over a brat's soft crying. Itachi seemed surprisingly responsible with his little brother, so I left Itachi was baby duty. I didn't like kids that much; the only kid I liked was Itachi and that was because he was more like an adult anyway.

My heart dropped when I heard the alarm pick up in tempo and changed to a higher pitch. That was the call for all civilians and lower ranked shinobi to evacuate to the Monument. Whatever was happening in the village it must be bad if it was a village-wide evacuation. I stood, “Come on Itachi, we've gotta-” I cut myself off when I saw my cousin already heading for the compound gates. I didn't even have it in me to be angry at him for leaving me behind.

I had only gotten five feet when there was a thunderous crash that shook the ground. Itachi and I stumbled, trying to regain our footing and still move fast enough to get to the shelter. Then I felt it. A tangible anger, so hot and violent that I felt sick to my stomach. Sasuke, who had been quietly whimpering until now, shrieked in fear, his small face turning a dark red. I was scared, I wanted to run away and hide, to give into to whatever was attacking. It was the predator and I was the cornered prey, I stood no chance against that anger; that raw, potent Killer Intent.

Something firm but small tugged at my wrist. I jolted out of my frozen state and stared down at my little cousin. Itachi looked as calm and impassive as he always did, as if he couldn't even feel the Killer Intent infused in the very air–no, it was the air. I was breathing in that powerful anger with every breath until it became my whole being. I wanted to hide. I wanted-

“Yanagi-itoko, we have to get to the shelter,” Itachi spoke, cutting off my thoughts. To anyone else he might sound bored and indifferent, but I could hear the small lilt of concern in his voice. That seemed to wake me up. I was frozen like a deer downwind of the wolf and here my six year old cousin wasn't even bothered about the attack. He was trying to comfort me! What was worse, I actually needed to be comforted. It angered me, I was weak. A child barely in the academy was more rational than I, the Rookie of the Year, was!

I promised myself I would never freeze again.

vvv FLASHBACK OVER vvv

I concentrated on my sensory ability, trying to determine what would make Naruto lose control. I doggedly ignored the hotredredredthatnightfearmustrun chakra that was the Kyuubi's and instead on the chakra points all over the bridge. Zabuza was a little ahead of me, his chakra thick and languid like honey; there was the smooth, silky feel of Hinata's chakra behind me beside the stunted civilian amount that was Tazuna's. Haku's, hard and sharp like ice yet surprisingly warm, was darting all over the place as he tried to dodge Naruto's crazed strikes. Sasuke's chakra was muted, almost to the point of...

I snapped my head around and stared as the ice mirrors shattered and Haku came flying out, laid out flat by Naruto. In between the broken shards of the still hanging mirrors I could see a dark lump in the center, not moving.

...of death.

It wasn't the first time I had seen death, and certainly not the last. I wasn't even bothered all that much by it. Except... I was. There was a difference between seeing a teammate die in the course of a battle, when you didn't have time to think or even notice that they had just died; and seeing the body of a child, your own cousin, crumpled on the ground like a thrown away doll.

Suddenly all the horrible things I had said to him, all the unkind actions and unfriendly glares, all came rushing in like a tidal wave. Like a tsunami. Obito was right, I was a horrible sensei. I had gotten one of my students killed on their first C-rank mission. It didn't matter that it had been updated to an A-rank. I had in essence killed my own student; I had signed his death warrant the moment I didn't withdraw from the mission when it was clear that it was out of Team 7's capabilities. I felt sick, both physically and emotionally. I felt like I was drowning with no life line to pull myself out. I... needed an outlet, I needed to rid myself of all the pent up guilt and anger at myself.

“Awww... are you going to cry?”

I found my outlet.

Slowly I turned to stare at Zabuza, That Bastard, all my emotions draining away and leaving nothing behind. I didn't take joy in seeing him jolt in surprise at my flat gaze, or the way he when white under his tan skin when my Killer Intent washed over him. All I cared about was beating the shit out of that bastard for putting my cousin in the position that killed him. I raised my hands slowly and, almost in a trance, I ran through the hand signs, never breaking gaze with that bastard. I stared straight into his soul and found it... lacking.

Zabuza's death wouldn't bring back Sasuke, but it would sure make me feel a hell of a lot better.

I could only hope.

Demonic Illusion: Shackling Stakes Jutsu. I thought, since my injured jaw prevented me from saying the jutsu. Zabuza's eyes bugged out when he felt the imaginary genjutsu stakes driving into his body, pinning him where he stood. I dropped the last hand sign and started another jutsu. I kept my eyes on Zabuza the whole time, letting him see my cold indifference to him. I wanted that bastard to know that I wasn't killing him because he was my enemy or because I hated him.

I was killing Zabuza just because I fucking felt like it.

Katon: Great Fireball Jutsu. I didn't channel too much of my chakra into the fire. I didn't want to incinerate Zabuza on the spot. That wasn't good enough, I wanted to slowly roast him alive. I wanted him to die a slow agonizing death, covered in third degree, maybe even fourth degree if I was feeling merciful, burns for even thinking of harming my baby cousin. I took a deep breath and brought my fingers up to my mouth. I watched dispassionately as Zabuza tried to evade the oncoming fire, I didn't feel the pleasure of watching my prey squirm before I killed them. All I could think was 'how dare you.'

I noticed Haku too late.

vvv 3rd POV~ Hinata vvv

Hinata was frightened. She stood there shaking on spot as she watched the plume of red chakra spiraling out of the mirrors. With her Byakugan activated, she had seen all that had happened. She saw the spike of chakra in Sasuke's eyes and saw the glint of red–the sign of the sharingan. Hinata saw him fall, saw his chakra sputter like a candle before dying out. She saw Naruto lose control, she didn't need her kekke genkai for that. That violent red chakra was clear from even the distance between the boys and Hinata.

Hinata saw Yanagi-sensei freeze up when she spotted Sasuke's body. Afterwards, Hinata saw Sensei take on a whole new personality. Hinata shivered, with her Byakugan activated there was no missing that cold look in Yanagi's eyes. There was a saying in Konoha: 'The four things any Konoha nin fears are an angry Aburame, a focused Inuzuka, a motivated Nara, and a bereft Uchiha.' Until now, Hinata had never realized why.

The Hyuuga heiress clung to her kunai as if it were a religious symbol, she wasn't ready for this. When she had graduated as a genin, she knew there would be death and fighting, but... not like this. She hadn't expected to see her first death so soon, and definitely not her own teammate! Hinata would happily go back to doing D-ranked missions if she survived.

She hoped she survived.

But that hope was dwindling into an unattainable dream. If Sasuke, the strongest genin of their class, couldn't survive, then what hope did she have?! Yanagi-sensei had promised she would protect them with her life when they first fought Zabuza, but she had failed. Yanagi had broken her promise. There was no guarantee that Sensei would protect Hinata if Zabuza came after her, Yanagi didn't even protect her own cousin.

A sentimental fool, that's what Yanagi-sensei called Hinata. Was this what she meant? Sasuke had ran to protect Naruto from being hurt, Hinata saw that, and in turn the Uchiha boy had gotten killed. “If you live past your Chunnin Exam I'll be amazed” That's what Yanagi-sensei had said, had she been right? Were emotions really a hindrance to a shinobi? From the way Yanagi-sensei was going after Zabuza, it seemed like she was right. Emotions were an obstacle to a shinobi, they got in the way of the fight and clouded the mind. Hinata remembered that there was a rule about emotions, Rule 25: A shinobi must never show their feelings. It was one of the only rules she actually knew by heart because it was the rule most shinobi strove to achieve.

But... did Hinata have what it took to get rid of her emotions?

Movement behind Yanagi-sensei alerted Hinata and she opened her mouth to call out a warning, not even thinking about it, but she was too late.

vvv Normal POV vvv

I stumbled back a step, caught off guard by the sudden body in front of me, cutting of the steam of fire to only a small fireball barely bigger than a cat. Time seemed to slow as I watched the small jet of fire fly from my mouth and connect with Haku's chest perfectly. Surprisingly, he didn't go flying back from the force of the fire. It should have sent him back twenty feet minimum, but he didn't budge a single inch. I stared straight into the kid's brown eyes for the first time, his mask was gone– probably Naruto's doing– as my ninjutsu hit him.

He looked... peaceful.

It was Sasuke all over again.

I had killed many people in my career as a kunoichi, I've even enjoyed it at times. Many of those kills had been children, kids who had gotten in my way; but I never liked admitting to those kills. I always felt ill when I watched the light go out in their young eyes. But... it was necessary for Konohagakure to keep going, so I swallowed my disgust and soldiered on. I didn't look back and reflect upon my kills, I didn't find pride in the high number. I knew that if I did I would never be able to live with myself again. Haku though... he did it willingly. He jumped in front of my fireball to protect the bastard he found precious to him.

Haku, a Kiri nuke-nin, had the Will of Fire.

And I almost killed him.

Almost.

There was still a chance to save the boy.

The question was: would I take it?

He was my enemy, he killed my cousin.

But he was only a boy... barely older than Team 7. If I let him die, it would be just another Sasuke. A death of a child saving someone precious to him.

No, I would not let that happen.

My decision made, I wrapped my arms around Haku and leaped back away from a shell shocked Zabuza. Once the demonic illusion fell, the bastard would no doubt come after me, regardless that Haku was now in my possession. I knew the Peach bastard didn't care for Haku, his sordid little speech of Haku being the ultimate tool was enough evidence for that. I needed enough time to try and heal the kid, at least enough that I could leave him to destroy Zabuza if he attacked.

I laid Haku down gently and ran a diagnostic jutsu to check how injured the boy truly was. Deep second degree burns across the chest, as well as minor second degree on the right arm and shoulder; but fortunately no internal bleeding or ruptured organs. Not as bad as I thought then. I sighed and allowed my eyes to close a brief moment; I was glad that I had intended to slowly roast Zabuza alive, it had probably saved the kid's life. Haku would need help beyond my capabilities, but I should be able to heal him enough so he would last until I got a medical nin.

Reaching into my pack I withdrew a kunai, intending to use it to cut open Haku's haori and shirt. Zabuza, however, jumped to the wrong conclusion. “Get away from him!” The Demon of the Mist shouted. It surprised me how desperate he sounded.

Was... his speech about Haku just a ruse?

No, I shook my head, I couldn't think like that. It was bad enough that I was healing the boy. I couldn't start going soft on Zabuza. He needed to die, otherwise Tazuna would always be in danger. Haku... once I healed him I would take him prisoner and turn him over to T&I when Team 7 returned to Konoha. This kid was a gold mine of information about the Mist Rebels, and being partners with the infamous Demon of the Mist and one of the rare Kiri nins to have a Kekke Genkai meant he probably had a high bounty.

I stubbornly ignored the disgust I felt.

I fingered the pinstriped collar of Haku's bodysuit to determine the patterned stitch. Luckily it was a downward weave, which would make slicing through the fabric much easier for me. I raised the kunai to Haku's neck...

...and hissed when a shuriken embedded itself in the back of my hand.

Zabuza was charging towards me when I looked up to see who had thrown the shuriken. I was shocked that he was even able to move; Demonic Illusion: Shackling Stakes was a powerful paralyzing genjutsu. Only the most powerful were able to move under it, and even then it wasn't without struggle. So how the hell was Zabuza moving as if he was never under the genjutsu?! Genjutsu was supposed to be the nuke-nin's weakness! No time to think about it, Zabuza was already swinging his sword, trying to behead me. I barely managed to duck under the Kubikiribōchō and rolled away from Haku. Zabuza snarled at me and placed himself between the boy and I. His blade raised in a defensive position.

Interesting.

So Peaches didn't attack Tazuna, even though he had the perfect opening... again. Zabuza had had the element of surprise. I hadn't known that Shackling Stakes had ended, which meant he should have assassinated Tazuna, and possibly Hinata, before I knew what had happened. But he didn't. Zabuza came to the rescue of his fallen comrade, had even warned me by shouting. And when he had managed to separate us, instead of going for Tazuna or me like one would expect him too, Peaches continued to guard Haku from me. He totally ignored the bridge builder who stood behind him. It was a perfect opportunity to attack, there would be no way I could reach Tazuna in time, both Zabuza and I knew that. And yet, there wasn't a twitch from Peach-boy to indicate he meant to attack.

Only defend.

“Yanagi-sensei!” Someone landed beside me. I jolted and looked down at Naruto in surprise. I hadn't even thought of him since he smashed that ice prison to pieces. I was too focused on making Zabuza pay for Sasuke's death, and then saving Haku's life, to even think about the other two genin.

Naruto was staring at me, “Sensei, what happened to you?!” That's right, the blonde didn't see me get my ass handed to me by Zabuza. He was too busy with the Ice Princess.

I grunted and pointedly looked at Zabuza, trying to convey my meaning since my jaw was still out of commission. Unfortunately, the Kyuubi brat was too dense to get my meaning. He squinted at me, “Hey, I asked you a question!” I was really really tempted to kick him off the bridge. I was trying to think and-

“HEY, WHAT DID YOU DO TO HAKU?!”

That did it, as soon as this fight was over, I was murdering Naruto.

Zabuza growled at Naruto's demand, but didn't take his narrow eyes off me. The man was finally serious about the fight. This wasn't some little show anymore where we threw a few half assed attempts of trying to kill each other. We were fighting for our students now, and that meant there was no holding back. In the shinobi world, students were considered the last straw. If someone went after a student, they had better prepare to fight for their lives against the master.

Zabuza was guarding his one and only dying student.

I still had two students to protect. No matter how much I wanted to strangle one at the moment.

Tazuna be damned, this was no longer about a bridge builder and some petty shipping company. It was personal now. It became personal the minute Sasuke died, and I sure as hell wasn't letting my cousin and student go without being avenged. Even if I didn't kill Sasuke's true killer, I would damn sure take out the master. If it was the last thing I did, then so be it.

“What the hell are you doing?!”

There was a beat of silence before Zabuza and I turned to look at the new speaker. There were very few brave, or stupid depending on how you looked at it, souls who would willingly speak when two jounin level ninjas were releasing large amounts of Killer Intent. It was a well known fact that shinobi weren't mentally stable, and in the height of battle one could easily turn on some idiot who opened his big mouth. I deadpanned when I spied the little midget standing in front of a large crowd of thugs, all leering as if they were something special. Honestly, quantity did not equal quality. Every shinobi knew that, but it seemed that civilians forgot that little fact constantly.

I could already tell where this was going.

The midget piped up again, “You're supposed to be attacking the bridge builder, not playing ninja with a whore.” My flat expression turned to one that screamed, 'do you have a death wish?!' Zabuza wasn't even injured and here the idiot was mouthing off to an A-class nuke-nin. What an arrogant little dwarf. I didn't think it was possible, but I had finally found someone more arrogant than the entire Uchiha clan and Zabuza combined.

Zabuza did not look amused, “Gatou,” Boy talk about loathing, I could feel just how much Zabuza hated the man by the levels of contempt in his voice, “what is all this? Why are you here and who are these thugs you brought with you?”

This Gatou tapped his cane against the ground. “Well, you see there's been a change of plans.” Called it! But still, this guy was an Idiot, with a capital 'i'. Betraying a nuke-nin who was already pissed off... how did the little dwarf become one of the richest men in the world? “According to the new plan, you die of this bridge... Za-bu-za.” Oi! That was my plan, the little bastard.

Peaches didn't look all that surprised, “What.” It wasn't even a question. More like a 'Really? You're actually trying that shit?' statement. If I wasn't still burning with adrenaline and anger I would find this whole thing hilarious.

Gatou leered, as if he thought he was something special. “That's right. You're too expensive, so I decided to take you off the payroll.” See Zabuza? That's what you get when you're greedy. Your rat bastard employer pulls the most cliché move in history on you. “Of course, even these thugs with me cost something, so if you could slaughter a few of them before they take you down, I'd appreciate it.”

Seriously, how was this guy still alive? Betraying a nuke-nin was one thing, but asking said nuke-nin to kill a few of his hired thugs who were standing right behind him before they 'killed' Zabuza was just asking for it. All it took was one of the thugs to stab the midget bastard in the back and then they could go loot his no-doubt richly furnished home for payment. They'd probably get a lot more money that way.

But of course, male egos would prevent them all from thinking clearly and they would just battle to the death.

Delightful.

Gatou went even further and started adding mockery to the list, “Think you can manage that, Demon of the Mist?” The midget chuckled condescendingly. “Look at you, you look about a demonic as a wet kitten.” Apparently Gatou had never faced a wet kitten before. Especially when they're called 'Tora'.

I turned to look at Zabuza. Of the both of us, I was the one who was more injured. In fact, Zabuza didn't even have a scratch on him. The only thing to his disadvantage was that he was mentally fatigued from the genjutsu I had cast on him. But like all good ninja, Peaches didn't show signs that the genjutsu had bothered him. I could tell Zabuza wasn't going to last much longer under the insults and blood would soon spill, but he didn't move. He thought I still meant harm to Haku.

Even if I did, I would be willing to call a truce if only long enough to shut Gatou's damn mouth.

I struggled to a stand, feeling slightly dizzy which meant that the blood loss was finally getting to me. This fight would be over for me soon, but I still had enough chakra in me to at least heal Haku so his life was no longer in danger, maybe even a little more. I swayed a little as I walked towards Zabuza. The man tensed and tightened his grip on the hilt of Kubikiribōchō. I stopped just out of reach of the big ass sword and forced myself to speak, “Heal...Haku.” I manged to push past my aching jaw, though it was so garbled that even I barely understood it. I really hoped Peach-boy got my meaning, because it was obvious that I couldn't explain in depth. Damn man, why couldn't he break my ribs or something?!

The Kiri nuke-nin stood there for a moment, I could see in his eyes that he wanted to trust me but didn't dare. Not that I blamed him, until recently we were ready to kill each other. But like every experienced shinobi, we both knew that situations could change in an instant and enemies could become close allies in the blink of an eye. The problem was if those allies would return to enemies once the fighting was done. If I did, which I wouldn't dare, then I would be in the perfect position to off Haku without any intervention from Zabuza.

By pure luck, Haku whimpered quietly at Zabuza's feet. A small reminder of how close to death the kid was. I couldn't wait around for Peaches to decide, Haku might be dead by the time Zabuza made up his damn mind.

Unfortunately our conversation drew attention from that grub Gatou, “Ha! So that little brat is dying, eh? Serves him right for trying to break my arm! Do us all a favor, dear, and kill the runt for me, would you? I'll pay you handsomely for your troubles!” The little man asked me. I shivered in disgust and shot the midget a dark look over my shoulder. I hadn't noticed that his left arm was in a cast until now. My respect for Haku rose several notches. Too bad Ice Princess didn't slay the cretin when he had the chance.

Zabuza narrowed his eyes at Gatou and I mentally laughed at the midget's stupidity. Insulting a man was one thing, but insulting his student when the kid was on the doorstep of death was something else entirely. Peach-boy looked at me with murder in his eyes, but I knew it wasn't directed at me. “You're in luck, Uchiha, our fight is over now” Zabuza rasped. My mouth twitched into a brief smile, but I let if fall when even that hurt. Peach-boy raised his voice so the rest of the people on the bridge could hear him, “since I am no longer in Gatou's employ, Tazuna is safe.”

Gatou twitched, obviously infuriated that his little display of audacity was backfiring on him. Did he honestly expect that Zabuza would still go after Tazuna after he cut Peach-boy's pay? That was just arrogant in the extreme. And I was an expert on arrogance.

I was an Uchiha after all. The trait for arrogance was in our blood just as much as the Sharingan was.

Quietly I knelt beside Haku again and nicked a small cut in his collar before ripping the shirt open. I grimaced when I saw my handiwork. The skin across his thin chest was warped and yellowish. White bubbles dotted the skin like small snow capped mountains; some were as round as coins and others barely bigger than the head of a pin. The burn continued up Haku's neck, fading to a pale rosy pink as it curved up his jaw line and half way to his right eye, looking no more superficial than a sunburn. Haku's upper right arm was a glossy vivid red with sparse clear blisters running along the inside of his arm. Further down the arm, just below the elbow, the burn faded into the same rosy red color that marred the poor boy's cheek. It was honestly a surprise that Haku was still alive at all. The shock alone from the jutsu should have sent him into cardiac arrest.

I felt Zabuza's heavy gaze on my back and looked up to meet the nuke-nin's glare, “You harm one hair on his head and I will end you.” Zabuza said and for the first time since I clashed with him, I felt intimidated by the Demon of the Mist.

Wordlessly I nodded and activated the Mystic Palm Technique. I wasn't nearly as good as Rin was, but she taught me the basics of medical ninjutsu. That would be enough to keep Haku alive. He would be horribly scarred for the rest of his days, but it was better that he be hideous than dead. Besides, those who truly loved the boy wouldn't care what he looked like.

vvv 3rd POV vvv

Naruto didn't understand at all what was happening. One minute Yanagi-sensei and that peach guy were glaring at each other with the intent to kill, then the weird short guy with the weird hair showed up and started insulting Zabuza and all of a sudden Zabuza and Frizzy-sensei were friends! It was all so confusing and Naruto couldn't keep up. He wanted to scream and make them explain, but Yanagi-sensei would probably knock him upside the head again. And she hit hard!

Yanagi-sensei was kneeling down beside Haku. She was... healing him. Naruto frowned at his sensei. He remembered what she said to him when she refused to give anything to that sick boy, “I don't see the point in wasting resources to a lost cause when there are more likely cases around that can live.” Naruto didn't know how Haku had gotten hurt, but it looked bad. Almost like Haku-san wouldn't live, even Naruto would admit to that no matter how much he didn't want to. So why was Yanagi-sensei healing a lost cause?! Sasuke! If Yanagi was willing to heal Haku, then shouldn't she try to heal Sasuke too? Naruto looked over to where the body of Sasuke laid, why wouldn't Yanagi heal Sasuke? He was her cousin, and Haku was the enemy; so shouldn't she focus on Sasuke and not Haku? Naruto wanted Haku to live, sure, but he wanted Sasuke to live more!

“Yanagi-sensei, what about S-Sasuke?” Naruto asked. He wanted to yell, but he could barely even bring his voice above a low mumble. He didn't like the way Yanagi's shoulders stiffened, Naruto's sensei was normally more reserved than that. Naruto could hardly ever figure out what Frizzy-sensei was thinking unless she was mad, so for her to act out of character didn't bode well for Sasuke.

Zabuza hefted his large sword up onto his shoulder and looked at Naruto. The nuke-nin's voice was surprisingly soft when he spoke, “Kid... your teammate is dead.”

“Then why...?” Naruto started to ask as he turned wide eyes on his sensei's back. Why was she healing Sasuke's killer?! His blue eyes turned up to Zabuza, wordlessly demanding answers.

Zabuza only looked away, unable to meet the kid's gaze. Death normally didn't bother him, he enjoyed killing and enjoyed seeing the survivors' fear when he took credit for his kills. But... there was something in that blonde kid's eyes that made him almost feel ashamed of it all.

The short midget laughed harshly, “Look at you! So soft! Awwww, are you going to cry?”

Naruto couldn't take it any more. He spun around and leveled a harsh glare at the scruffy little rat, “Shut up!” The Kyuubi container roared. He couldn't stand it! Not anymore! If Yanagi-sensei was going to be a coward then fine, Naruto would take care of those thugs by himself! Screw the shinobi code or whatever bullshit Yanagi spouted at him, Naruto would just follow his own code then!

Naruto charged forward before Zabuza or Yanagi could stop him.

vvv Normal POV vvv

I tried to grab Naruto as he shot off, but I wasn't in a good position. He had been standing behind me and I wasn't at my best so my reaction time was off. I twisted awkwardly and landed on my stomach, my arm stretched out before me. I didn't even come close to grabbing the blonde. Grimacing I pushed myself off the ground and was preparing to run after my hot headed student, when a blur of grey shot past me. I fell back in surprise.

“You heal Haku, I'll get the brat!” Zabuza ordered over his shoulder. I blinked after him; it was common that enemies would temporarily call a truce to deal with a mutual foe, but it was always an uneasy truce. The way Zabuza was acting... it was like we had been allies for a long time. And that, I did not understand.

“S-sensei!” I turned to see Hinata and Tazuna coming forward, Hinata's lavender eyes landed on Haku and she swallowed audibly. Even Tazuna looked horrified at the warped mess that was Haku, and I was sure he had seen many nasty injuries during his career in construction.

No time to think about that. I couldn't deal with those two, not while I was dealing with Haku. In quick succession I ordered Hinata to retreat and continue guarding Tazuna–even if Zabuza said he would no longer go after the bridge builder that didn't mean he would stop any thug going after my client–through basic genin hand signals. There was a chance she didn't know even one of them; the Academy never really went into depth with hand signals, which was stupid in my opinion. It was inevitable that one day all shinobi faced a situation where silence was the difference between life and death. It was at those times that hand signals were an essential tool to a ninja. I would be damned if another one of my students died because I didn't teach them something basic and easy In the back of my mind I added teaching Naruto and Hinata all the levels of hand signals to the growing list of things I should have done.

Luckily, Hinata seemed to understand me. She nodded a bit shakily and backed up, pawing at Tazuna's sleeve. The old man stood frozen, his eyes on the boy that was slowly dying. I ignored them both as I activated the Mystic Palm Technique again and spread my palms out just inches above Haku's chest. Green chakra seeped into the affected area and I mentally twisted it so that the chakra spread through the skin, going no deeper than the burns. I was in my own little bubble, completely ignoring all that went around me as I laboriously worked to save my cousin's murderer.

vvv 3rd POV~ Naruto vvv

A heavy hand landed on Naruto's shoulder before he could get within two meters of the first thug. Furious the blonde kid spun around, expecting to see his cowardly sensei, but was surprised to see the no-brow nuke-nin Zabuza. A small twinge of fear shot through him and he wondered if Zabuza was going to take him out. Naruto could barely hold his own against Haku, he knew there was no chance he could even make Zabuza sweat. Sure there had been that time before, when Yanagi-sensei was captured, but that was with Sasuke. Sasuke was gone now, and Naruto honestly couldn't think of any way he might stand against Zabuza on his own. All his plans included Sasuke.

Whap!

“Ouch! HEY!” Naruto yelped and glared up at Zabuza, the person responsible for smacking Naruto upside the head.

“Stupid. What do you think one little pest like you can do against them?” Zabuza grouched as he grabbed the blonde by his hideously orange jumpsuit and dragged him back a few steps. “You're nothing but target practice to those bastards.”

Naruto didn't want to hear it, “Shut up! This is all your fault! If you... If he hadn't... Then...” He didn't know what to say, all he knew was this whole mess, from Sasuke to that creepy short guy, was somehow Zabuza's fault.

Zabuza's answer wasn't helping matters, “Haku is nothing but a tool to me, just like your friend was nothing but a tool to your sensei. You shouldn't linger over his death, it makes you soft. A true shinobi-”

The blonde growled, “You shut the hell up! I don't give a damn was a true shinobi does. Haku thought the world of you, you were one of his precious people and Sasuke...” Naruto trailed off for a moment, unable to push away the image of Sasuke dying in his arms.

“Aniki... he's going to be mad at me. He made me promise to... try and surpass him. But...”

Naruto shook his head fiercely to clear the image of a senbon-riddled Sasuke, his friend, “Sasuke died because of me! And Haku is dying because of you!” Naruto finished with a shout, pointing a rigid finger at the silent Zabuza, “You and Haku were together for years, doesn't that mean anything?!”

Zabuza's eyes didn't change from their cold flat gaze, “You don't understand the way of shinobi, you're still just a child who knows nothing. I merely used Haku as Gatou used me. He is nothing but a broken tool now, one that will never be the same. A broken tool is a useless one.”

The anger roiling inside Naruto's gut boiled down to utter disgust. He couldn't understand how someone as loyal as Haku could get mixed up with a rat bastard like Zabuza, “If you really mean that, then you're a bigger rat than I thought. You're worse than Gatou!”

Zabuza simply watched the kid.

“Yanagi-sensei said that she wouldn't waste resources on a lost cause, but she's over there right now trying to heal Haku for you; and you say you don't care about him! Haku wanted me to kill him when I defeated him, he didn't want to dishonor you, damn it! He thought the world of you, so much that he was willing to die for you! While he was sacrificing everything for you, you never felt anything for him? What does that mean for me, huh?” Naruto's voice started dying down as the grief he had felt for both Haku and Sasuke began overwhelming his anger, “If I become strong, does that mean I become as cold hearted as you are? Haku almost thew his life away... and for what?! For you and your dream? He never had a dream of his own, but you don't care, you just tossed him aside like he was nothing...” Thick tears began streaming down Naruto's cheeks. “It's just... so wrong...”

The Kiri nuke-nin looked away, unable to face the genin. “You talk too much...” He muttered under his breath. Naruto looked up, surprised at the tired tone in Zabuza's voice. The blonde kid was nearly shocked to see tears gathering in the nuke-nin's eyes. “Haku was always too soft for this life, and curse you I refuse to let him throw away his life on one as worthless as I.”

Naruto stared at the man in silence, unable to even think of what to say. He had never meant to actually change Zabuza's mind or anything. He just wanted Zabuza to see how wrong the shinobi way was.

The man seemed to be smirking under the bandages covering his mask, “What, cat got your tongue, gaki? Or are you so surprised to discover that I'm human? Even shinobi are human, no matter how much we try to escape that fact. That's what your sensei was trying to teach you... but we always fail. Or at least... I have.” Zabuza reached back and wrapped his fingers around Kubikiribōchō's hilt, “Stay back, kid. This fight is between me and Gatou.”

There was a brief pause, a small moment of silence, before Zabuza suddenly charged forward with the speed only a shinobi could achieve after years of training. Naruto watched the nuke-nin in awe and horror as he met with the numerous thugs of that Gatou guy and, like a wave breaking on a rocky shore, blood pieces of thugs went flying into the air. Arms, legs, torsos, heads, it didn't matter what it was; but some appendage would go into the air every time a thug thought he had a chance against Zabuza. Naruto suddenly knew how out of league he was, a simple genin, against someone like Zabuza; and he was immensely glad that Zabuza wasn't against Team 7 anymore.

“Rah! Damn it, I'm not going to sit this battle out like a coward!” Naruto suddenly shouted and made a hand sign, “Kage bushin no Jutsu!” Three other Naruto's popped into existence, drawing the attention of a few thugs that Zabuza left alive to go after Gatou. Their eyes lit up at the sight of an easier target.

One thug snickered as he took a step towards the genin, “Awww, look. A little brat thinks he has a chance against us. What'chya say, boys? Shall we teach him a lesson?” There was a collect of evil chuckles as each thug brought out their weapons and turned to face the boy.

Naruto was not amused, “Don't underestimate me!” He snapped and two shadow clones charged forward. While the thugs were busy taking care of them, Naruto concentrated on the jutsu Yanagi-sensei had taught him. He had mastered it, but he didn't even have a fan to concentrate the chakra. Naruto doubted that the jutsu would work without a fan or something to concentrate his chakra, at least that was what Yanagi-sensei had told him. However this was a live or die situation and he didn't have a choice. “Fūton: Wind Blade!” Naruto shouted and prayed to kami that this worked.

It didn't.

The thugs laughed at him when nothing happened, “Look at him, you're a long way from home, little kid. What a pathetic-” The thugs' self proclaimed speaker was suddenly cut off when a hawk shot past Naruto's shoulder and slammed full speed into the man's face, its wings smacking the man upside his head. The thug's laughter turned into screams of pain as the hawk raked its curved talons down his face, carving deep bloody grooves in his cheeks, and pecked at his eyes with its sharp hooked beak. He reached up, trying to pull the bird off, but it only fell back for a moment before swooping back in and digging it's talons into the man's neck. The thug fell backwards and laid prone, dead, underneath the now calm hawk as it cleaned it's blood spattered feathers. The whole thing had only lasted a short moment.

Naruto spun around, his blue eyes going wide as he saw Yanagi-sensei walking towards him. A swarm of hawks flew around her, a cacophony of shrieks and caws. The hawk that had clawed at the thug took flight and landed on Yanagi-sensei's shoulder, looking utterly smug with his perch of honor. The rest of the hawks spread out among the bridge work, each of their sharp yellow eyes seeming to pick a victim to claw the face off of.

Even though the blonde really didn't like his sensei all that much, he was glad to see her. “Frizzy-sensei! How's Haku, did you heal him?” Naruto asked when his sensei stopped beside him.

“I don't know,” The tall woman said blandly as she shrugged, “Taicho is healing him.”

Naruto blinked at her, confused before looking over his shoulder at where Haku was. He was surprised to see another Yanagi still crouched over the older boy's body, green chakra pouring out of her hands and into Haku's chest. Naruto twisted to face the Yanagi beside him, “You're a shadow clone!” He exclaimed.

Let be known that, shadow clone or not, Yanagi-sensei's hits still hurt. “Idiot. Of course I am.” She cracked her knuckles and made a strange hand sign that Naruto didn't recognize, “You take care of these buzzards, I'll take the rest of the stragglers that Peach-boy leaves.” The hawks seemed to respond to Yanagi-sensei's hand sign and like a storm cloud of feathers and sharp talons, all shot forward after any thug standing still.

Naruto decided to ignore the horrible screams that were now rising from the masses.

vvv Normal POV vvv

Haku groaned quietly under my hands and I sighed in relief. That he was responding meant that Haku was out of danger. I could quit healing him if I had to and not worry about him dying regardless of my efforts. I was already dangerously low on chakra again after I had created that shadow clone to offer some protection and assistance to Naruto. I didn't really trust Zabuza to watch out for the blonde kid and there was no way in hell that I would let another student die on this mission, especially since the two more dangerous opponents were out of the fight. Naruto could handle civilian thugs easily one on one, but no one could survive being overwhelmed. Even by wussies like Gatou's so called bodyguards.

“Otou...san...” Haku wheezed. I frowned at the boy as he lolled his head away from me, his eyelids fluttering uselessly. Who the hell was Haku talking- I looked behind my shoulder where the training dummies were getting their asses handed to them by Zabuza. Did Haku think of Zabuza like a father? That would explain his suicidal behavior when it came to protecting the kenjutsu master.

The boy's eyes suddenly snapped open and he tried to sit up. I cut the healing chakra to pin him to the ground and gave him a wordless stern look in hopes to convey my meaning. Haku's chocolate brown eyes glared back at me. I noticed that his right eye was blood shot from capillaries that had burst when I hit him with the fire ball, and felt a twinge of guilt at the reminder that I had almost killed the kid. Had I not wanted Zabuza to suffer painfully, I would have killed Haku. Strange to think that my thirst for revenge had saved someones life.

...I was signing up for therapy when I got home after this.

Haku looked away first. He looked strangely unhappy. I blinked down at my impromptu patient, confused as his change in mood. I had been expecting anger or... something other than sadness. “Let me die...” Haku rasped quietly.

I raised an eyebrow and leveled a flat look at Haku. I wasn't going to let the kid die, not after going through everything to keep him alive. I was almost at the point of chakra exhaustion again, damn it! And this little brat had the gall to ask me to kill him. I got it that Zabuza basically raised the gaki only think of himself as a tool, but every human should have some self-preservation. And if this was Haku trying to get away without having to face the fact that he killed my cousin then I say he could go screw himself.

Instead of answering, since I really couldn't anyway, I reached into my weapons pouch and brought out a roll of bandages Rin forced me to keep on my person at all times. Without meeting Haku's gaze, I gently lilted his head forward and began wrapping the slim bandages around his skull so that they covered his right eye. I didn't have the medical talent to heal capillary blood vessels, his eye would have to heal naturally, or at least until he got better help.

The ice user reached up and grabbed my wrist with a surprisingly strong grip. I paused in my work and met Haku's single uncovered eye. “Kill me.” He hissed. By his grimace I guess that the boy's vocal cords had been damaged as well. With my free hand I activated the diagnostic jutsu and laid my palm against Haku's throat. Despite his pleading for me to kill him, Haku tensed when he felt my touch. I couldn't help but smile inwardly at that. Any good shinobi didn't like having their neck exposed, it was a sign of helplessness and defeat.

Withdrawing my hand after scanning the damage, I went back to work wrapping Haku's eye up. It wasn't serious, something more like a sore throat than an internal burn. Haku's grip on my left wrist tightened almost to the point of breaking it. I glared at him, if he didn't let me go I was going to make him seriously regret it. There was only so much touching a jounin could take before their temper snapped.

The boy quelled under my full glare and he released my wrist in a hurry. I might not be able to talk at the moment, but I could easily get my point across with glares.

“I'm useless now...” Haku whispered after a moment of silence. I rolled my eyes and contemplated the consequences of knocking the Ice Princess out. Since Zabuza was a little busy at the moment he might never know, but there was always the risk of Haku tattling on me.

Best not risk it.

“Shutit.” I ground out, not even bothering to enunciate my words clearly. I hated the kid for killing my cousin, but it wasn't Haku that I wanted to kill in revenge. It was Zabuza for taking such an innocent child like Haku and twisting his rare loyalty into something ugly. But if it was that manner of thinking then I couldn't blame Zabuza either, I realized. It was Kirigakure for creating so many monsters like Zabuza, for teaching children that death wasn't just a part of life, it was something to enjoy.

I loathed the Bloody Mist.

Haku started begging, “Jounin-san... please.”

I shook my head. I would not give in to his demands. I refused to kill the child, if only because I didn't want to see my work and efforts to keep him alive go to waste.

“Frizzy-sensei! Haku!” Naruto's joyous yelp sounded from further down the bridge. I shifted to look at my blonde student bounding towards us. Behind him Zabuza followed at a more sedated pace, Kubikiribōchō on his shoulder gleaming red with blood and gore. My summonings were scattered among the dead, feasting upon their reward for helping me. I couldn't suppress the grimace at that. I had always been slightly revolted at the contract I held with my summons: that anytime I called them into battle they got the remains of any flesh left.

My shadow clone was crouching even further back, close to the edge of the bridge where a small lump that no hawk touched laid; I was guessing it was the remains of Gatou. I had given her orders to get something with Gatou's writing for purposes I intended to use later.

A soft scrap of someone's sandal against the rough ground brought my attention back to what was in front of me. Zabuza stared down at me passively, his face bandages splattered with the scarlet blood of his enemies. He glanced at Haku laying beside me, who looked away, then back at me, “I suppose you held up your end.”

I wasn't going to try and ask what he would do if I hadn't.

Instead I looked at Naruto where he knelt beside me and jabbering endlessly to the silent Haku. The kid had seemed to forget that the ice user had killed his teammate, but I wasn't going to point it out to him. I wasn't that cruel.

Placing a hand on the ground, I slowly got to my feet carefully concealing any sign of struggle from Zabuza. We might be allies now, but until I could secure the alliance it would remain unsteady and must be treated as if it were a wild animal. I did not trust Zabuza in the slightest and I could only expect the same regard he had towards me.

Besides, I didn't want that bastard's help.

My shadow clone was coming back towards us. Our eyes met, her red against my black, and she nodded before turning to Naruto, “Hey, bratling, go find Hinata and make sure Tazuna is secure.” Naruto twisted around to stare at the shadow clone then at me standing beside her. I narrowed my eyes at him in a silent threat. Clone Yanagi was still his sensei, just as a copy of me. The brat had better get used to taking orders from my clones just as much as as he took orders from me.

Naruto quickly scrambled to do my bidding, leaving Zabuza and Haku alone. I turned my back on the nuke-nin pair and brushed passed the shadow clone, dismissing her as I went. I had another matter to attend to, and it wasn't a pleasant one. I did not wish for either of my remaining students to be around as I stored Sasuke's body in a storage scroll like he was a common bounty.

The area where Sasuke had died was further back on the bridge, away from where the fighting had taken place. My little cousin laid where Naruto had left him, senbon needles still sticking out of him like some sick attempt at a porcupine. He looked like he was still in pain, his pale face scrunched up and etched with fine red lines from stray needles grazing his skin. I stared down at Sasuke, feeling empty.

Uchiha do not show sadness; they use their grief as a tool to fight. We were the strongest clan in Konoha, we must lead by example. That was what every Uchiha child was taught long before they even entered the Academy. Emotion was a liability and a hindrance. Tears are a sign of weakness. Something Kakashi-nii pounded into my head at an early age; further cementing Uchiha teachings. I never really bothered with it all though. My short temper was an emotion and one I readily applied to almost every situation I came across. I used it to my benefit though, instilling some small level of fear among those I could. On that small foundation I built my entire reputation. I was ruthless, vulgar, quick tempered, and more arrogant that most Uchihas on a good day; and I was proud of that.

I wanted to feel sad that Sasuke was gone forever, but I couldn't. Regret, yes. Regret that I hadn't taught him more to keep him alive. Disappointment in myself for living up to Nii-san's prediction and being a horrible sensei. Anger that I wasn't tearing Zabuza and Haku apart right now for killing the boy. But no grief. I had seen too many children die already, what was one more?

Even if he was my cousin.

Slowly, I knelt by his body and pulled out a premade storage scroll used exactly for this purpose. I had no talent for fuinjutsu, so I relied on other people to make them for me. I mildly wondered if Nekobaa would be sad to know that one of her body storage scrolls was being used on her favorite little Uchiha and if she would be disappointed that Sasuke would never complete that Paw Encyclopedia she always talked about when I visited her.

I unrolled the scroll and laid it down beside Sasuke's corpse. There was no time to ponder useless things. With a gentleness I knew Mikoto-oba would expect, I lifted her dead little boy and laid him on top of the seal's focus point. I sat back and studied him before absently pulling a senbon needle from his shoulder. I knew that his family would not appreciate seeing the weapons that killed him, I should pluck them before sealing Sasuke's body. I reached for the senbons in his neck, feeling that those were the most demeaning. After all, good shinobi didn't like having their neck exposed.

There.

I froze, not sure what the hell I was feeling. Not a heartbeat, Sasuke's heart had long stopped, that was sure of it. But... warmth. Chakra. Life. Like a small ember still clinging to the warmth of flame, determined not to burn out and become a lowly lump of coal. Steady, waiting for that extra push to turn back into a brilliant fire. There was still a chance to save my baby cousin. I was low on chakra, what I gave possibly couldn't help, but if might keep that ember flickering for just a while longer until someone could stroke it alive again.

Screw it.

I laid my palm flat against Sasuke's chest and pushed what remaining chakra I could spare into his coils. It wasn't much, but I felt his heart flutter beneath my fingers like a caged little bird. Good, then he no longer needed help, Sasuke could make it back to us on his own.

Which was excellent, since I was passing out again.

#Script's Archives #sensei fanfic #naruto fanfiction #fanfiction

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evil-overlord-scriptology · 5 years ago

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But I Don’t Want to be a Sensei! Pt 3 (ARCHIVED)

Chapters 11, 12, & 13

Chapter 11: Training, Yanagi-Style!

Demon of the Mist. Master of the silent killing technique.

So why didn't he kill silently?

Why did he make his presence known and draw me into a long battle instead of killing Tazuna before any of us could suspect something.

Tazuna went off on the little brat, but Naruto ignored him by exclaiming that people were hiding around in the bushes all around us. I was about to hit him for being stupid when I felt a surge of chakra behind me.

Naruto seemed to follow my instincts and aimed another kunai knife at the spot I felt the chakra surge. Tazuna smacked Naruto upside the head and the brat and drunk had yet another yelling match while I went to investigate. Just below the kunai that Naruto had thrown a white rabbit was having a heart attack.

A white snow rabbit.

Curse my cursed damn luck. The karma demons must really loath me.

I stepped away from Naruto's sobbing apologies to casually inspect the clearing, searching for chakra signatures. I wasn't a very good sensory nin, most of it was just pure natural skill since I had spent most of my training on my sharingan and attacks, so I wouldn't be able to sense anyone who was suppressing their chakra at a jounin level.

Considering that I couldn't sense anyone meant that my suspicions were right and our next attacker was a jounin skilled opponent.

I hadn't been able to sense Zabuza until he wanted me to.

So why did he want me to?

And that kid with him, he was also able to suppress his chakra enough that I didn't sense him until he felt like it too.

Why?

Why didn't the false hunter-nin attack me? We both knew that he could easily take me out as weak as I was. Towards the end of the fight, I had been putting on a front. That hunter-nin knew that, I could feel it in his gaze. But he only retrieved Zabuza. Did he want us to be surprised when Zabuza came back to attack us? No. That false hunter-nin would know that I'd be able to figure it out. People like Zabuza and his allies wouldn't underestimate anyone.

Zabuza was hired by Gatou, I know that. Which meant he was in it for money... or was he? Gatou would want Tazuna dead quickly, so Zabuza should have killed him quickly. Instead he went after me. That meant that Zabuza didn't care for money as much as it would seem. So why? What did Zabuza really want?

Something to do with Gatou. He had money–Zabuza could be hired by anyone else for that. He could offer protection–Zabuza didn't need it, he was capable of protecting himself and he had an ally. Gatou practically ruled over the Land of Waves–I doubted Zabuza was interested in that. Gatou had a shipping company...

“Obito-nii! You said you were going to teach me something cool! This is geography!” A younger me whined.

My older brother laughed, “Just you wait, imoto, you'll see this is cool!” I gave my brother a skeptical look. Obito often lied to me for the heck of it. Nii-san, seeing my expression, reached over to ruffle my curly hair, “That's a promise!” He said cheerfully. I automatically smiled. Whenever Obito-nii said those words, that meant whatever he was saying was true!

Turns out he was right. It was very interesting learning about rebels often hiding in secluded areas like small islands. Obito was going to teach me about smuggling too, but then Kakashi-baka-nii-san came and interrupted everything.

Rebels. Smuggling. Zabuza.

My mind recalled Zabuza's page in the Bingo Book. He attempted a coup d'état on Kiri because he disagreed with the government. It was rumored that he had joined the Mist Rebels, but it was never proven.

Could working for Gatou be a cover up?

...

“Frizzy-sensei, I know you're awake!”

“Idiot, don't yell!”

“Shut up, Teme! I know Frizzy-sensei is awake! She keeps twitching.”

“N-Naruto, p-p-plea-please q-quiet down. S-sensei is try-trying to r-r-rest.”

My eyes snapped open and I immediately glared at Naruto, “You call me that again and I'll kick your ass.” I growled threateningly. I tried to sit up and immediately groaned as my chakra system convulsed painfully causing my muscles to spasm and freeze up as well.

A woman I didn't know was by my side in an instant, “You shouldn't move.” She said in a mothering tone. I eyed her, she looked a lot like Mikoto-oba except her face was a lot plainer than my aunt's. She even acted like Mikoto. “Until you're feeling better you should just lay down.” I gave in with a sigh and laid back down. If this woman was anything like Mikoto-oba, she wouldn't take no for an answer. It'd be in my best interest to just listen to her.

“S-sensei, are you al-alright?” Hinata asked, coming to kneel beside my futon.

“Hn.” I responded with the Uchiha general answer for everything.

Naruto, of course, wasn't going to take that for an answer though, “What happened anyway, sensei? You were fine one minute and the next you were passing out! What gives?”

Sasuke bopped Naruto upside the head, “Idiot, Yanagi-itoko used too much chakra.” I gave Sasuke a strange look, since when did he call me 'itoko'?!

Tazuna spoke up from behind Hinata, “Well you did take down a powerful ninja, so I guess you've got an excuse.”

“He's not dead.” I said, turning my gaze to the ceiling.

I think everyone had a miniature heart attack.

“W-what?! What do you mean he's not dead?” Tazuna practically screeched like a girl.

I closed my eyes and struggled to sit up again. It tore at my pride that Hinata had to help me, but at least I wasn't laying down like some helpless invalid anymore, “Hunter-nins destroy the body where they make the kill. So why did that boy take Zabuza away?”

Silence permeated the air as that information sunk in.

Hinata gasped a little, “T-those needles he-he used...” She said under her breath. Everyone looked at the shy heiress and she blushed. “S-sorry!” She squeaked, ducking her head and twiddling her fingers.

I reached out and pushed her hands down, “No, what were you saying?” I asked. Now wasn't the time for shyness. If Hinata had information, then she should share it.

The girl nibbled at her lip in nervousness and, after a long silence, finally stuttered out, “W-where he h-h-h-hit... i-it was a pres-pressure p-p-poi-point... that c-ca-causes d-death if hit h-hard e-e-en-enough.” Of course Hinata would know. The Hyuuga fighting style specialized in pressure points, hitting them with chakra to cut off the chakra flow.

Sasuke stiffened, “The senbon needles. They don't have a high casualty rate.” He said, mostly to himself.

I nodded, “Exactly. Unless hitting a vital organ, senbon needles don't kill. My guess is that the hunter-nin used the pressure points on Zabuza's neck to create a temporary death. A hunter-nin is an expert in human anatomy, causing the heart to stop temporarily is child's play to them. Also, the fact that the hunter-nin we ran into took Zabuza's body away instead of taking care of him on the spot and using senbon needles for a weapon points to one fact: that boy was trying to save Peaches... not kill him.”

Tazuna tried to reason with us, “Come on, you're over thinking things!” By the tone of his voice, I could tell that Tazuna really want us to be paranoid and not right.

I gave the man a serious look, “An Uchiha does not over think things.” I said, a little more harshly than intended. Tazuna cleared his throat awkwardly and looked away. More calmly I recited a rule from the Shinobi Handbook, “The Shinobi Handbook states: 'Encountering suspicion, the ninja prepares quickly. Hesitation leads to disaster.'” I narrowed my eyes at Tazuna, daring him to comment again. I should thank Kakashi for being a ninja robot when I first met him; because of him I memorized the entire handbook by the time I was seven.

Involuntarily, of course.

I glanced at my genin to gauge their reaction. Naruto was grinning a little psychotic grin and Hinata looked extremely pale. Sasuke wasn't showing any emotion.

Naruto stood up, his hand still clenched in a fist, “Alright! Let's prepare then!”

Blinking, I looked at my dumbest student with surprise. Honestly I had expected him to start yelling about going and hunting Zabuza down, not training.

Even more surprising was when Hinata gave Naruto a look that could have been called a glare... if she wasn't blushing, “B-but Naruto, Y-yanagi-sensei is hurt!” Hinata wasn't even stuttering as much, and she was talking to Naruto! Normally she couldn't say one word completely when talking to her crush.

“Uh... Sensei?” I blinked and shook my head a little before focusing on a confused Naruto, “What's with the funny look?” The blonde asked, the dread in his voice apparent. Mildly I wondered if he though I was going to whip out another Uchiha-style training session like I did when they bothered me too much.

I smiled kindly at them, “I'm just impressed by how much all of you have grown. Especially you Naruto.” Naruto squinted at me. I grinned wider until my eyes closed, “You've grown the most.”

Should have known the praise would go straight to his head, “So you noticed, huh? Things are going to get even better, believe it!” Naruto exclaimed.

“I don't believe it!” A childish voice, not so different from Naruto's actually, shouted behind the blonde. I looked past Naruto to the doorway where a small child in green overalls stood. He glared at us from under his hat with eyes so filled with hate and... loneliness.

“Who are you!?” Naruto enunciated each word loudly, pointing an accusing finger at the kid.

Tazuna spoke before the kid could, “Ah, Inari, where have you been?” My eyes went from Tazuna to Inari, so this was the kid that would cry and cry if we hadn't taken the mission to protect Tazuna after we found out how dangerous it was.

He sure didn't seem the type.

Inari, ignoring the rest of us, ran for his grandfather, his voice suddenly happy and eager, “Welcome back, Grandpa!”

“Inari! That was very rude, these ninja helped your grandfather and brought him here safely.” The woman who I had yet been introduced to scolded. No doubt she was Inari's mother and Tazuna's daughter. Seemed to me that she wouldn't resent Konoha if Tazuna was killed.

Grandpa Drunk was a dirty blackmailer.

Tazuna waved off Inari's mother, “Ah, it's okay. I'm rude to them too.” He chuckled.

I shot him a nasty glare, “Same to you, Grandpa Drunk.” I snapped. Tazuna tried to glare at me, but he didn't hold a candle to any Uchiha. Not even Ibo.

Inari gave us all a blank look before turning to his mother, “Mom, don't you see, all these people are going to die! Gatou is going to kill them all!”

Naruto had the right idea when he yelled, “What did you say brat?!” He gave a cocky grin, “Listen up, you know what a super ninja is? Well that's me, only I'm going to be better.” Contradictory much? “I'm going to be Hokage!” Oh dear kami, not this again, “This Gatou or Blatou or whatever he's called is no match for a real hero like me!”

The brat scoffed, “There's no such thing as a real hero. You're just full of stupid ideas!” Inari snapped, looking very much like a miniature Uchiha in appalling fashion at that moment. Yeesh, talk about dramatic.

There was a brief moment of silence before Naruto started for him, “WHAT'D YOU SAY?!” Sasuke luckily leapt up to grab the blonde idiot before he could murder Inari. I almost felt sorry for my cousin for having to be so close the that blaring mouth. No doubt Sasuke would be deaf by the time he was twenty.

“If you wanna stay alive you should go back where you came from.” Inari said snobbishly then started walking away.

Finally, finally, Tazuna scolded him, somewhat, “Inari, where are you going?”

“To look at the ocean!” Inari snapped as he opened the doors and left, slamming the door behind him.

I sighed, “That boy is going to have a bad attitude when he's a teenager...” I commented to no one.

Tazuna looked at Naruto after a moment, “Sorry about that.” He said in a 'not so sorry' tone. I should know, I used it all the time.

Inari's mother took over then and shooed everyone else out of my room, saying I was still supposed to be resting. I sighed when I was alone and wondered what everyone else was up to. Not that I cared, I was just bored. I nearly cried when I realized that if Obito found out about this he was going to murder me for getting hurt! Kakashi would be right behind him. And Shisui would never let me live it down.

Still moaning about my morbid future, I closed my eyes to rest and plan ahead.

vvv

I flicked three small squares at my genin. Being ninjas, even miniature ones, all three snatched the paper out of the air without thinking. They looked at the chakra paper confused, then at me. I leaned against the tree I sat under, “That's chakra paper. When you channel your chakra into the paper it will react according to your chakra nature. For instance,” I held up a fourth slip of paper and channeled my chakra into it. The paper split in two. “That's the sign that I have Fūton nature.” I waved my hand at Sasuke, “Go, Duckass.”

My cousin gave me a small glare before concentrating on the bluish paper in his hand. As we watched the paper began to crinkle. Sasuke looked at me for explanation. I nodded once, “Seems you have a Lightning affinity. Being an Uchiha you also have Katon nature, correct?” Sasuke nodded silently. Of course he did. The Uchiha clan was born with fire affinity, no two ways about it. There was a reason why we were famous for it after all.

Naruto went ahead and channeled his chakra into his paper without my say-so. The paper cut in two, “Cool! We have the same... uh... katra nature, Sensei!” He exclaimed.

“Chakra” I stressed before mentally running through all my wind ninjutsus. I didn't have that many that were low level, and those that I did weren't really battle-oriented. Anything I taught him would be useless in the inevitable battle against Zabuza. Maybe I should start him on a higher level ninjutsu. With his large chakra stores, Naruto shouldn't be in too much danger.

But it was Naruto we were talking about.

Shaking off my dilemma for now, I nodded to Hinata for her to go. She channeled her chakra into the slip of paper and watched as it turned damp with water.

I tsked, “Well, I don't know any water ninjutsus. It goes against my fire chakra nature.” I said, feeling slightly sorry for Hinata especially with her pulling that disappointed look. She was the one who needed training the most and I couldn't help her at all. Not many people could, really. Unless... I snapped my fingers, startling my three genin, “I can teach you some stealth techniques for now, I noticed you're good at that. And I'll try to find you someone someone to teach you Suiton jutsus later.” Already my mind was going through a mental file of everyone I had seen using Suiton techniques.

All three of my genin were giving me strange looks. I raised an eyebrow in question, but I already knew what was going on in their tiny little minds. “Why... why are you being so helpful?” Sasuke finally asked.

I gave them a smirk, “What, you miss the surly sensei? Because I can easily go back into that.” Cue a quick head shake from all my precious genin. I rolled my eyes and explained, “We're going against a S-ranked criminal and his unknown ally. I was barely able to defeat Peach-boy last time-”

Naruto interrupted me before I could continue, “But that's the point!” I was mildly surprised at his outburst, “If you were unable to beat Zabuza then what makes you think we can?!” Was Naruto... admitting that he wasn't strong? “You passed out last time after that battle, and that weird guy in the mask will also be there this time, so what makes you think we're ready for that kind of-”

Being the awesome sensei that I am, I smacked him in the head with one of my crutches to shut him up.

“Didn't I just say that you're getting stronger?” I asked hotly, irritated that my rare praise wasn't warming their sorry little hearts. First time I ever praised Naruto and he was whining about not being strong enough! “Look, I wouldn't have been able to do anything during that fight if you three hadn't done something.” I think the genin were a little shell shocked.

Naruto, stupidly, tried to speak again. I grabbed him by his collar and pulled him down until we were inches apart. “Look here, Obito Mini-me, you're going to shut up and learn a jutsu because if you don't that little promise you made back when we fought those chunnin will go to waste!” Naruto clammed up after that. I let him go and struggled to a stand, “Good. Now, lets start training. Sasuke, heel.”

My cousin's right eye twitched at being treated like a dog but came forward anyway. I stared at him intently, trying to figure out what jutsu I could teach him. I already knew he could to the Grand Fireball–it had been a big thing around the clan when Sasuke mastered the technique when he was seven, making him yet another prodigy.

I swear the Uchiha clan spat out either prodigies or total losers.

“Do you know the Phoenix Sage Technique?” I asked suddenly, looking down to the duckass haired boy for his answer.

Sasuke added a slight frown to his otherwise emotionless face, “Aniki says that's a Katon technique.”

“I know that. I have Katon and Fūton chakra, I can't teach you any Lightning jutsus. Yes or no, did Itachi-san or anyone else teach you the Phoenix Sage?” I said testily. Damn this little brat and his need to question everything!

Sasuke shook his head 'no'.

I grinned sadistically. “Good. Now I get to apply Uchiha-style training on you.” I said then chuckled evilly. It might have been my imagination, but Sasuke seemed to turn three shades paler than his normal pasty self. But first, “Sit, while I deal with the others.” I commanded my cousin before pushing down on his shoulder, forcing him to sit.

Naruto was over his gloom and doom attitude already, “Oh oh! Sensei, me next! Me next!” He yelled eagerly, waving his hand in the air like a child eagerly wanting to impress the teacher.

Ignoring him, I turned to Hinata. “You're training is simple to explain. Go out deep into the woods and try to sneak back here. Try to suppress both your chakra and the noise you make. If you make it back here before the boys can hear you, then you pass. Got it?” Another nod. “Shoo then.” I said, waving my hand towards her. Hinata hesitated for only a moment before disappearing.

As soon as Hinata was gone, my vision was filled with yellow and orange, “Yanagi-sensei! Teach me next! I want to learn a kickass jutsu!” I was kind of starting to miss the 'doom and gloom' Naruto...

Picking up a leaf that laid at my feet I gave it to the blonde brat, “Here.”

Naruto squinted at the leaf in confusion, “Huh?”

I picked up another leaf and held it in my right palm, “To master any Fūton jutsu, you need excellent control, even more than the control required for tree walking. Use your chakra to cut the the leaf; it'll be harder than cutting the chakra paper since you must consciously cut, not just channel chakra.” I focused my chakra to cut the leaf I was holding and did just as I told him, “Do that and I'll teach you the Wind Blade.” The Wind Blade was a B-rank jutsu. But since Naruto already knew the shadow clone jutsu, which was forbidden, I doubted he'd have too much trouble.

“WHAAT?! You said you were going to teach me a cool jutsu!”

“I will. After you learn to control your chakra better.”

“I already know how to do that! Teach me the jutsu!”

“Don't make demands, kid, or I'll do nothing. Shut up and train with your leaf.”

Naruto pouted, predictably. He crossed his arms and turned his nose into the air like a child. Rolling my eyes I leaned over and pinched his nose between my index finger and thumb. Naruto screeched and tried to swat me off, but I didn't let go, “Look, if you don't learn this then you'll never get any of the wind jutsus I'm going to teach you.” A complete lie, but what's a little white lie if Naruto never found out about it? I let go of Naruto's nose and straightened up, “Unless you want to be defenseless when Zabuza comes back, I suggest you don't question my methods. Get to work.”

Before Naruto could say another word, I grabbed Sasuke by his ridiculous Uchiha collar and bodily dragged him away, ignoring all his protests along the way. I only let go when we reached a clearing well enough away from Naruto and made Sasuke sit again.

I sat down across from him, staring intently at my cousin. There was a long moment of silence as we stared at each other. Eventually Sasuke wilted under my gaze and shifted nervously. Finally he looked away.

Quickly before he knew what was happening, I shunshined further away and made the appropriate hand signs, “Katon: Phoenix Sage Jutsu!” I intoned and several fireballs flew towards Sasuke.

My cousin's eyes widened as the fireballs roared towards him. I watched in amusement as he dodged the first five before creating a Grand Fireball to cancel out the last of my jutsu. When the fire died away, Sasuke was glaring at me. I smirked and did the same hand signs, “Katon: Phoenix Sage Jutsu!”

Repeat.

By the time I did the third Phoenix Sage jutsu, Sasuke was pissed. He snatched a kunai from his weapons pouch and charged me. I laughed at his puny attempts to attack and backflipped away. “Katon: Phoenix Sage Jutsu!”

“Katon: Grand Fireball Jutsu!”

I shunshined behind Sasuke to avoid his fireball and recreated the hand signs, “Katon: Phoenix Sage Jutsu!” Sasuke turned around, his eyes wide and filled with horror as he saw the several mini fireballs flying towards him. There was no way he could avoid them in time. I watched passively as Sasuke managed to dodge the first and second fireball. The third skimmed his right forearm, making the brat cry out in agony. He leapt away from the others, getting out of the fire zone and crouching down to cradle his injured arm.

“What the hell is wrong with you?!” He shouted at me. I was impressed that he wasn't crying from the burn. The Phoenix Sage Jutsu was hot enough that if the fire grazed you, it would result in a second degree burn. When Obito first taught me the jutsu I was bawling my eyes out when I got burned.

Instead of answering his question, I started making the hand signs again. Sasuke, finally catching on, leapt away. I kept following him, spitting out fireballs, but every time I did Sasuke only leapt back again. He looked good and riled now. My mouth twitched upwards in a smirk, time to throw in insults.

“You know for being a prodigy, you're a pretty lousy one.” I drawled casually. Sasuke straightened up from his crouched position, his brows drawn low over his nose. I nodded as if he had said something, “Even my brother, the famed 'dead last of the Uchiha', was chūnin at eleven and had unlocked his sharingan at age thirteen. And let's not get into Shisui and Itachi.”

“What's your point?” Sasuke snapped angrily.

I sneered as I made the hand signs again, “My point is that you're going to have a hell of a time learning without that sharingan. Katon: Phoenix Sage Jutsu!”

vvv

“Ouch!” Sasuke actually yelped later that night as I applied salve to his burns.

I rolled my eyes, “Hush up, you big baby! I'm not even hurting you.” I swatted the brat over the head for good measure.

Tazuna snorted, “Now you are.” He chuckled then made a squeaking noise in the back of his throat when Sasuke and I glared at him.

Naruto seemed torn between laughing at Sasuke and being jealous that he got to learn a jutsu while Naruto only got to practice more chakra controlling exercises. By mid afternoon he had mastered the leaf exercise to I gave him another, when he master that one I gave him another and another. Sasuke seemed grateful every time Naruto showed up saying that he mastered the exercise, since it was a break from my torturous training methods.

I tied a knot in the last bandage and pulled it tight, causing my cousin to wince. Sasuke glared at me as he rubbed his arm. I smirked, “If you tell Itachi-san, he'll only tell you to train more. You know he will.” I teased, reading exactly what was on my younger cousin's mind. Well Itachi would probably kill me too, but I'd leave that part out.

No need to give Sasuke any funny ideas.

Feeling an evil look staring at me I looked up to see Tsunami glaring at me hotly, “Yanagi-san, you overdid it today. If you keep this up you won't be able to protect us when that man comes back!” Tazuna's daughter snapped at me.

I waved a flippant hand, “Eh, I'm a jounin, I've been dealt with chakra exhaustion before.” I said dismissively. Granted when the last time I had been on an A-rank with chakra exhaustion I had other jounin to back me up, not fresh genin. Not that I was telling any of them that.

Tsunami just continued to glare at me.

Giving in I stood up with a sigh, “Fine. I'm going to bed. Hinata, since you already mastered your training I'm putting you in charge of guarding Tazuna tomorrow. See you two boys in the morning.” I said deviously. Sasuke paled a fraction while Naruto cheered happily. With that I hobbled off for another night's rest.

vvv

“Uh... Sensei, what are we doing...?” Naruto asked. Sasuke was off in a little corner of the clearing, practicing the Phoenix Sage jutsu–he had finally memorized the hand signs I had used for the jutsu–while the Kyuubi brat and I sat in a meditative pose in the center of the clearing. It was mid-morning and so far had been peaceful except for Naruto's consent nagging.

I opened an eye, “Right now? I'm enjoying the morning. Shut up and meditate.”

“But-”

“No.”

“Sensei-”

“Meditate.”

“What does-”

“Shut up.”

“Hmph!” Naruto pouted, but at least he fell silent. I relaxed and let my mind drift over my musings on Zabuza and his ally again. I needed to figure out what they wanted before they attacked again. Maybe... maybe if they're intentions weren't as evil as I originally thought I could talk them out of their job and thus save bloodshed. Gatou, he would have to go. I didn't need the drug lord around and trying to control the Land of Waves. This whole mission was just a tangled mess. I had to worry about my genin and Tazuna. I had to figure out how to get rid of Gatou. I had to do something about Zabuza and his ally.

Why didn't I have Itachi's insane ability to plan years in advance?!

Bamf!

I opened my eyes to see Naruto had fallen over, asleep. I sighed. This kid was a long way from being Hokage, that much was for sure.

“Hey, idiot! Wake up or I won't teach you the Wind Blade!” I yelled in Naruto's ear. From his shriek of pain, I guessed that I probably burst his eardrum.

...Oops...

vvv

“Come on...” I groaned to myself as I dragged the unconscious Naruto back into the house. For a kid, he felt like he weighed a ton! I dumped him at the table and dusted my hands off.

In the meantime, Tsunami was gaping at Naruto's crumbled state, then at me, “What happened?!” She asked shocked. After a moment the older woman's eyes narrowed as if she blamed me for Naruto's sorry state. Though, it kinda was my fault...

I gave her a raised eyebrow, “He fell unconscious. He'll be fine tomorrow.” Normal kids took months months to recover from near chakra exhaustion; but Naruto was the Kyuubi container, a little chakra exhaustion wouldn't bother him too much.

“What's the use? You're just going to die!” Three guess who the doomsayer was, and the first two didn't count.

It turned out that Naruto wasn't as unconscious as I thought, he was just being extremely lazy, “What do you mean?! We're training very hard to protect you, and you just-”

Inari cut him off, “It doesn't matter how hard you try, there's no such thing as a hero!” With that the little brat ran out of the room, slamming the door shut. Tsunami ran after her son, calling out his name. I looked at Tazuna, knowing that he had answers.

Grandpa Drunk sighed and set his tea cup down. He nodded towards a torn picture hanging on the wall, one that showed his family there smiling. I squinted at the picture, along the edges that had been torn, I could barely make out part of a masculine torso behind Tsunami. There was a story behind this family's strange behavior, I could practically smell it.

“He wasn't Inari's real father, he came into our family later...” Tazuna started. I sat back and laced my fingers behind my head, I knew I was in for a treat.

Chapter 12: Bitter Taste of Reality