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Congratulations

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everything is truly so terrible but i just remembered doreen ketchens playing clarinet for her infant grandson and then i was kind of okay again for 36 seconds

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have some sambucky! it’s all i can offer in these trying times

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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: The Falcon and the Winter Soldier (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Captain America (Anthony Mackie Movies) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Sam Wilson Characters: James "Bucky" Barnes, Sam Wilson (Marvel), Alpine (Marvel), Figaro, Sarah Wilson (Marvel) Additional Tags: Getting Back Together, Cats Summary:

But above and beyond there’s still one name left over,

And that is the name that you never will guess;

The name that no human research can discover—

But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.

When you notice a cat in profound meditation,

The reason, I tell you, is always the same:

His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation

Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:

His ineffable effable

Effanineffable

Deep and inscrutable singular name.

-from T.S. Eliot’s “The Naming of Cats”

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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Captain America (Chris Evans Movies) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Sam Wilson Characters: James "Bucky" Barnes, Sam Wilson (Marvel) Additional Tags: Catholic Bucky Barnes, Catholicism, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, HEAVY on the catholic influence, Angst, Masturbation, Fantasizing, Religious Guilt, Set Between Movie: Captain America: The Winter Soldier and Movie: Captain America: Civil War, POV Bucky Barnes, Introspection, Pining Summary:

What he wants… what he wants is not in the Holy Book. He won’t find the satisfaction to his desire in any liturgy, nor buried in a bishop’s homily or spread across his tongue with the body and blood upon reception of the Eucharist.

Alone and on the run in Europe, Bucky spends most of his time in his apartment, both in prayer and drowning in the weight of his own desire for the handsome stranger who's been hot on his tail.

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Hark! Who it be?

Why, tis another Discord server exclusive, including pic prompt and spiel. Another 2½yr old prompt shared with the world beyond my beloved MYSU.

Sam does this when he's getting comfortable bc habit in a one room/one bed trope sitchy-ation and Bucky is so thoroughly confused and intrigued.

Sam listened to the running water, grumbling as he punched his pillow into submission during his self-encouraged 'everything is stupid but me' meltdown.

Stupid mission.

Stupid Steve.

Stupid Bucky.

Stupid convention and double rooms being booked solid.

Stupid queen sized bed.

"Ugh!" He kicked from under the blanket, jumping out of the bed and crossed the room to the thermostat. If he had to share this space with the walking furnace, he'd need the relief of the cool air. He turned it down to a welcoming 68° basking in the instant kick of the a/c. He nodded to himself before stomping back over to the bed where he tossed the top cover back and over, folding it into a barrier halving the bed.

"Bucky better stay on his side, too." No hanky panky tonight, especially not before dinner. I'm no cheap date... "Wait, wha? Uhuh!" Sam shook his head quickly, immediately jumping off that train of thought. He slid down onto the coolness of the sheets, sinking into its comfort as the cool air wrapped around his body.

Sam groaned as he reveled in his heightened comfort level, forgetting himself a moment as he slid his knee up towards his body, falling into a horizontal ass pop as he's prone to do. When he's at home, in his own bed, alone.

And as luck would have it, there is a witness to this usually private, comfy, happy dance, a stealthy someone who was moonlighting as a cat burglar Sam was pretty sure. "What are you doing?" Bucky spoke softly into the dark, posted up in the doorway betwern bathroom and bedroom, confused at the suspect squeaks sounding from the bed.

He heard Sam's grumbling while he was in the shower. He tried to take his time, washing and conditioning his hair with some applewood scented stuff Sarah had given him on the impromptu birthday party they'd had for him. She'd apologized for the last minute of it at all at the time having just learned from Cass about the date when he'd wanted to read up on Bucky's history with the Howlies. "It's just a small gift for comfort and self-care. If you and my bigheaded brother are anything alike, you don't take as nearly much time for yourself as you should. So here's a simple reminder to indulge a little in your self care."

But back to the matters at hand because someone had been suspiciously quiet after the question. "Sam?" He asked, wondering if he should just pretend he believed Sam was just moving in his sleep. Nah. "I know you're not sleep, Sam."

"Uhhh... stretching? Yeah, stretching. Can't a man stretch out his hamstrings and glutes before sleep in peace?"

Bucky was discovering he had no problem with Sam's stretching; in fact he could kick himself for interrupting instead of just watching, but then he reasoned that'd be wrong without permission. His photographic memory would have to suffice.

"What you stretch and when is fine by me. I just wondered if I should find some Dramamine before climbing into bed if you're not done yet."

"Oh haha, funny. You're lucky I'm a nice guy and letting you share the bed after that quip. I have half a mind--"

"Still a rather generous measure if you ask me--"

"--to spread across this whole bed and leave you to find another surface to call home for the night," Sam raised his voice over Bucky's rudeness. "Floor looks mighty filthy and inviting."

Bucky froze a second time in the doorway, thinking about Sam spread out on the bed, stretched out beneath him, naked, skin glistening with sweat as his body spasmed, Bucky giving him many other reasons to groan...

"Well? What's your decision? You gonna shut up or set up camp on the floor?" Sam sounded, breaking the silence Bucky had fallen into, fighting to shake himself from the images. He again decided to store this new set for a later time, in another darkened room, alone.

"I'm not getting on the floor." Bucky was at his side of the bed in just a few strides. He fluffed his pillow noisily and laid out on his back, his left elbow pillowed on the blanket barrier, hand on his stomach itching to reach lower, the scenes in his head marked for later figuring a minute past counted as later enough. Bucky puffed out a hot breath, quickly raising his right arm to rest under his head.

Bucky heard the sudden sharp inhale from Sam and stilled. There was another few beats of silence before, "What's that, that apple stuff Sarah gave you?"

Brows furrowed, Bucky answered slowly, "Yeahhhh." He waited a few seconds, "Is it, is it bothering you? I can move to the fl--"

"Nonono, it's uh, it's fine. It's nothing... It just. It smells nice is all."

If a smile could harness and project the power of daylight, Bucky's sure it'd be about noon on a crystal clear day with the megawatt smile riding his face.

"Hey Buck?"

"Yes, Sam."

"Don't flirt with my sister."

Bucky still smiled and was feeling a little reckless when he responded, "Wouldn't dream of it...sweetheart."

Again the room fell to silence, but the air felt charged very differently from the earlier intrigued confusion. "Goodnight, Sam."

Sam slapped his pillow again, grumbling some more about stupid supersoldiers thinking they're funny...lucky they're kinda cute...still insufferable...ass

"You say something, Samuel?"

"You heard what I said with your nosy super powered ears. Stay on your side!" Sam demanded pointedly before flopping to the bed dramatically, hugging his pillow to him tight as the bed rocked like it did earlier.

"Sure thing, angel. No touching. Without permission."

Bucky smiled again as he heard the pillow-muffled cussing coupled with the accelerated heartbeat, wondering how long before permission would be given and what it would be like to touch Sam in any way Sam asked of him.

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Hello dear! The fanfic writer ask game #2 and #16 please?

#2-my current pride and joy is Icarus, of course. Torturing Sam is approximately 86,456 times more heart-wrenching than torturing Bucky, but I had to do it, for some reason. Trying to do that without losing the important themes of TFATWS was difficult but satisfying. And it was satisfying to torture Steve and Bucky because, well, it is for some reason. Maybe I just really wanted to simultaneously satisfy my craving for whump with a desire to put Sam at the center of his own story, something that the MCU just can’t seem to do even with this latest movie (yeah, I’m bitter). I have a certain obsession with the kind of trauma I put Sam through in Icarus but also, thinking about the story, it was a way for Sam to rage-quit the Avengers, show some complicated feelings about his military past and have a more fleshed out reason to take up the shield, which is all about Sam being centered in his own story (while also satisfying my own weird desires). But I also surprised myself with some of the choices I made with this story, which was kind of delightful.

#16-what do I struggle the most with in writing? I think writing stuff that isn’t dialogue, at least much of the time. Sometimes I have delicious dialogue but trying to fill in the details is like pulling teeth.

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Fanfic/Author Ask Game

Write a scene from [insert fic] in another character’s POV

Which of your fics is your pride and joy?

What are your top three most commonly used tags on AO3?

What are some words or phrases you feel like you overuse?

What’s something you learned while researching a fic?

Would you ever accept requests or commissions?

Coffee or tea while you write?

What is your favorite line/section from [insert fic]?

How did you get into writing fanfiction?

Is there a character or ship you'd love to write for, but haven't yet?

What makes a fic 'successful' in your opinion?

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Do you have an 'official' creative writing background such as a degree or previous experience publishing?

What makes you happiest? New fic comments, kudos, bookmarks, user subscribers, story subscribers, or Tumblr asks?

Does anyone you know in real life know you write fanfiction?

What do you struggle with most when writing?

What is something you recently felt proud of in your writing?

How many WIPs do you have and how many do you expect to finish?

How do you get over writer's block?

Share your favorite kiss scene from [insert fic]. If there's no kiss scene, share your favorite moment of intimacy (romantic or platonic)

What stops you from writing more in your free time?

Did you do anything special to celebrate finishing a fic?

What’s a story you’d love to write but haven’t even started yet?

Which scene/theme was the inspiration for [insert fic]?

Are there any moments in [insert fic] that feel "blurry" to you? Is this a stylistic choice, or would you go back and clarify the descriptions if you were given the chance?

Do you ever "prep" your fics with outlines or warmups before you start writing, or do you just dive right in?

Are any of your stories inspired by personal experience?

What's the angstiest idea you've ever come up with?

How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting?

Have you noticed your style change over time?

What fic meant the most to you to write?

A character you enjoy making suffer.

A character you want to protect.

What is your favorite fic to get comments/messages on?

Wild Card: Ask me something else!

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Catspiracy!!! 😻

Sam and Bucky each accidentally acquire a cat. Not that either of them will ever know, seeing as they’re on opposite ends of the country and aren’t really speaking to one another…

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I need to hear more about the Catspiracy story, if you feel like sharing. :)

Sam has a cat wander into his life and he can’t figure out a name for her. Bucky decides to take on a cat that just won’t leave him alone, but he renames her because Oreo is a dumb name. Sam and Bucky each think they’re just taking on a cat…

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Hi! High school baseball AU??

Sam did not get put in right field. Sam is a very capable first baseman. Bucky’s life is effectively ruined.

“He looks good in the uniform though,” Steve said from where he was lounging on Bucky’s bedroom floor.

“How would you know?” Bucky mumbled into his pillow as he lay face down on his bed.

“I’m straight, not blind. Also, Sharon says so. As does Nat. And Tony. And most of the cheerleading team, and about two-thirds of the soccer team.”

Bucky turned his head to glare at Steve. “So I have competition from half the school. Great.”

“So you’re going to ask him out?”

Bucky lobbed the pillow at Steve’s head. Steve merely caught it and slid it under his head. “You should at least test the waters. He might be into guys.”

“Someone that gorgeous and smart could have anybody he wants.” Bucky shifted to his back and stared up at the ceiling, resolutely avoiding Steve’s I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed, face.

“Nat and Sharon say he’s really nice.”

“I’m not looking for a pity date for prom-ahh!” Bucky squirmed beneath Steve’s 6’2” frame. “Get off me, you punk.”

“James Buchanan Barnes, admit that you’re pretty.”

“Do you have a boner right now?”

Steve reached into his pocket and pulled out his keys, his phone, a stupidly short pencil, and some nail clippers and placed them on the bedside table. “We’d already be dating if I were into guys. I would have been reeled in by those baby blues and that smile five years ago. I would have stayed because my mom likes you because you’re such a nice young man.”

“I would have dumped you for literally anyone else,” Bucky groused, with zero heat.

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Hello dear! SamBucky high school AU with baseball please? I've been on a high school AU and college AU kick with them recently, so I'm very intrigued

Sam did not get put in right field. Sam is a very capable first baseman. Bucky’s life is effectively ruined.

“He looks good in the uniform though,” Steve said from where he was lounging on Bucky’s bedroom floor.

“How would you know?” Bucky mumbled into his pillow as he lay face down on his bed.

“I’m straight, not blind. Also, Sharon says so. As does Nat. And Tony. And most of the cheerleading team, and about two-thirds of the soccer team.”

Bucky turned his head to glare at Steve. “So I have competition from half the school. Great.”

“So you’re going to ask him out?”

Bucky lobbed the pillow at Steve’s head. Steve merely caught it and slid it under his head. “You should at least test the waters. He might be into guys.”

“Someone that gorgeous and smart could have anybody he wants.” Bucky shifted to his back and stared up at the ceiling, resolutely avoiding Steve’s I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed, face.

“Nat and Sharon say he’s really nice.”

“I’m not looking for a pity date for prom-ahh!” Bucky squirmed beneath Steve’s 6’2” frame. “Get off me, you punk.”

“James Buchanan Barnes, admit that you’re pretty.”

“Do you have a boner right now?”

Steve reached into his pocket and pulled out his keys, his phone, a stupidly short pencil, and some nail clippers and placed them on the bedside table. “We’d already be dating if I were into guys. I would have been reeled in by those baby blues and that smile five years ago. I would have stayed because my mom likes you because you’re such a nice young man.”

“I would have dumped you for literally anyone else,” Bucky groused, with zero heat.

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Rules: List your WIPs and tag 5 people, and we'll send each other asks for or snippets

thanks for the tag @funsized-loser. I’m going to list my WIPs and indicate the fandom or genre but I’m writing at a snail’s pace these days. I’ll post snippets and/or details if y’all are curious though.

Where angels fear to tread (TRR fanfic)

The one about the mice (nonfic)

Sambucky high school AU with baseball

Musings on my knee (nonfic)

Catspiracy (SamBucky fanfic)

You should consider yourself tagged if you haven’t been tagged yet 😅

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And he’s RIGHT. Fuck everyone who is throwing a fit over Mackie speaking the truth. He and Chris Evans know this role better than anyone. Captain America is a figure of American propaganda both in the real world and in the MCU, despite how the characters Steve Rogers and Sam Wilson and actors Chris Evans and Anthony Mackie feel. If you just see the red, white and blue, the propaganda, and not what these characters have stood for, that’s on you. And if you think that America represents honor and dignity for everyone, wake the fuck up. Honestly, just look out the window.

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salty rant #2 (I can’t let this go, so I scream into the void) re: Brave New World

while Sam was done less dirty than he usually has been, I can’t let the following go:

what was with some of the dialogue? “Makes me think of a friend, controlled by trigger words.” I know Hollywood thinks we’re all morons, but Torres knows who Bucky is. What an odd choice.

I can’t be the only one who wonders where the hell the chemistry between Stan and Mackie was in that scene. It was so wooden. Yes, enough managed to leak through to give the scene some emotional depth, but I half wonder if one or both characters are skrulls. It’s as if the director told them to suppress all of their chemistry but they managed to sneak some past him. The whole scene was a lot of telling and very little showing. It was a let down.

thank everything for fanfic to fix things, as usual

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salty, crotchety take

It should have been season 2 of TFATWS. Too many threads and stories were attempted in two hours. And that scene? In the hospital? Wooden, partly phoned in, shoe-horned. What did they do to my beloveds? Also, I’m going to say it: give me more of Leila Taylor.

that all being said…my forty-something, “back in my day” ass does not regret spending 11 dollars on the ticket. B for effort.

okay, one more thing. Photo of Sam and Riley, photo of Sam and Bucky, no clear photo of Sam and Steve, I’m pettily pleased; Steve’s a bitch :)