exonerin

[exonerin]

they dont tell you this but like half of adulthood is just washing the same FUCKING pan

[exonerin]

"My name is Obi-Wan. I'm the android sent by Cyberlife. I look forward to working with you, Detective Skywalker."

[exonerin]

Fruit bat Anakin 🦇🍌 I have no explanation

Inspo ⬇️

[exonerin]

I need you

day 19 of gay people

[exonerin]

July Rent/Move out

Okay, good news! I've got a fish on the hook (read: an interested potential roommate that doesn't seem to be creepy) to get out of this vaguely suburbia psycho situation I'm stuck in. I can't tell you what a relief that is after the last person turned out to be a scam.

But obviously I still need to make it there, so if you want to and are in a position to (I stress that heavily, please do not put yourself at risk! Do not feel bad if you can't! Please.) I've opened up Ko-Fi again.

My offer to anyone who donates to keep a roof over my head is that I will happily write a fic, provide alpha/beta reading, moodboards, or anything else you can think of as a thank you gift, just give the word! (if you’ve changed your mind about your request since giving one, let me know! I try to reach out before I start the fic to make sure it’s something you’re still keen on, but updates are appreciated. 🤗 And there's also no time limit, so if you haven't given a request, you can do so later. No rush.)

JULY RENT: $25/800$

Ko-Fi | Paypal

if you’d like or need to (either is valid, taking you by the hand and guiding you to settings) block these posts, I tag #berrybad, so if you add it under both tags & post, poof! :]

[exonerin]

TOPWAN WEEK EVENT: SCHEDULE AND RULES ANNOUNCEMENT!

Hello there!

We are now announcing the schedule and rules for the topwan sith week(s)! Are you excited? We certainly are!!

For more details, please check out our complete rules on ao3. All links to our socials are in our carrd, link in our blog description!

And our prompts!

If you want to, you may also enter our discord which is open to all obikins who’d like to join! HERE is the invite.

If you have questions, please send us an ask or message!

We look forward to seeing all your creations!! 

X

Tagging for those who gave this preference in our precious poll!

@kisskenobi

@cringekind

@bxbyboytomh

@anakinsrx

@matchatonic

@tuneinanytime

@somethingsteff

@mutteringretreats1

@buying-the-space-farm

@a-real-magical-girl

@cinnamontomofo

@bitchin-witchin

@jedibongrip

@heavenhellandhumanity

@ondeadpeasantgirls

@proteinblue

@mererauder

@plushiewankenobi

@bad-poison

@yatsukisakura

@velanieee

@adepcure

@grapenehifics

@unspuncreature

[exonerin]

DAUNTLESS [Obikin | AO3 | Complete]

The final chapter for DAUNTLESS is available! And I can't believe I didn't miss a single deadline on this behemoth. I didn't plan for the fic to be quite this long.

Synopsis:

After Mustafar, Anakin wakes up on Tatooine. He died a monster. Now, he's a sand cat. In this disguise, he meets a kind desert hermit who takes him in.

The kind hermit lives an isolated, sad life. Yet, he's more compassionate than anyone Anakin has ever met. If Anakin has died -- If this is an unlikely second chance because even the Force scorns his soul after his betrayal -- he wants to be here for his hermit.

Of course, Anakin misses a critical piece of information that reframes this narrative.

TL;DR: Anakin is (turned into) an adorable sand cat. Obi-Wan's a hermit on Tatooine. They meet, and of course, they learn to love each other again. That's how destiny works.

Rambling:

I've been itching to explain the song for this fic since day 0. And I assure you, writing this behemoth took a very long time.

Shakespeare's Julius Caesar:

Grant that, and then is death a benefit: So are we Cæsar's friends, that have abridged His time of fearing death. Stoop, Romans, stoop, And let us bathe our hands in Cæsar's blood Up to the elbows, and besmear our swords: Then walk we forth, even to the market-place, And, waving our red weapons o'er our heads, Let's all cry 'Peace, freedom and liberty!'

The song:

I don't want the world, no, I just want a piece of it. I don't have a red handlike Caesar did. -Little Cup, Arrested Youth

Darth Vader(kin):

"I have brought peace, freedom, justice, and security to my new empire."

So, that's how that happened. It helped, of course, that the rest of the song was very on brand for the fic I was writing. It's a silly little thing. Not really worth a note. But it's just one of those little things I had fun with while writing this fic.

[exonerin]

If Obi-Wan already finds Anakin's glares cute, what happens if Anakin accidentally unlocks real puppy eyes when he gets upset and teary and pouty one day? Obi-Wan would not survive! 🤭

Definitely!! 🤭👍 And if Obi-Wan was still in the denial era of his love for Anakin, he would be conflicted and suffered greatly lol It may be brotherly affection to see Anakin's poor act and think he's cute, but it's another thing to be attracted to his teary eyes and pouty pink lips!

[exonerin]

troublemakers

day 14 of happy gay people

[exonerin]

IN YOUR FAKE MARRIAGE FIC. WHAT ABOUT OBI-WAN

Ah! I see. Now, I'm quite delighted to present my plan:

Obi-Wan is in love with Anakin. Which is the reason he's so salty about learning his Padawan (former Padawan) is married (he could begrudgingly tolerate and help hide a friends with benefits situation. But this? Well, he should have seen it coming, but he still feels betrayed).

He doesn't really want to help Anakin. While Obi-Wan doesn't want Anakin to suffer, he would get a lof of mileage out of seeing his Padawan (former Padawan) sit on the blisters that are the consequences of his own stupid actions. Truly, he should not have volunteered Anakin for his knighting.

Nevertheless, he supposes he is Anakin's Master and therefore responsible for his Padawan (former Padawan). So, he goes along. It's important to understand that it's not Obi-Wan's fault he's now in a position to show Anakin he's a much more attentive partner than a certain ex-wife (I really like Padme, but Obi-Wan's got this... *waves hand vaguely* ... you know going on).

Obi-Wan only treats Anakin like he would do his spouse regardless of their identity. Anakin will poke fun at how considerate Obi-Wan is initially. Because this is weird, right? But Obi-Wan's absolutely unperturbed. This is just how anyone in a committed, happy, love-filled marriage deserves to be treated. And Anakin realizes he likes being treated like he's the most special boy in the galaxy. He likes Obi-Wan asking him about his day, agreeing with him more, and switching drinks when Anakin orders something he doesn't like. He likes Obi-Wan showing genuine interest in his newest droid projects. He likes Obi-Wan holding his hand when they stroll through the gardens. And he loves Obi-Wan taking him on little dates that are somehow always to spots Anakin enjoys greatly as if Anakin's enjoyment outweighs Obi-Wan's dislike of pod-racing.

Anakin realizes he really likes being Obi-Wan's partner. But Anakin has weaseled his way into the position. Once Obi-Wan meets someone he actually loves, then this person will get all this special treatment.

So, Anakin just grows more and more jealous of this hypothetical spouse who gets the Obi-Wan's partner treatment. He kind of wants it. And as long as he's married to Obi-Wan, which means that Obi-Wan's absolutely bound to him in all ways possible (because Anakin is that obsessed about the institute of marriage), Anakin can monopolize on this.

But I would assume he would feel a little guilty for accidentally trapping Obi-Wan. Also, Obi-Wan didn't intend to marry Anakin, so he doesn't want Anakin. And Anakin has fallen head over heels for Obi-Wan because they're married and he really, really, really likes the idea of it. Anakin will be a little bit sad and pathetic (as is my preference). We'll leave it to Obi-Wan to set the record straight. Which he's very happy to do.

Anyway, they don't get a divorce and the Council doesn't really care as long as neither of them get their citizenship revoked or commit more fraud.

[exonerin]

WHAT ABOUT OBI-WAN

What about Obi-Wan?

Anon, you don't understand. I need context.

[exonerin]

drawing happy gay people every day the month of june until i forget: day 1

[exonerin]

Do you have anything you’re working on for the marriage prompt? It got me thinking I would love to see you write that one

Thank you so much! I don't have much for it, which means have I have a little bit of material (3.7k) for it, which I'm perfectly willing to share, of course. It is unedited, though.

I promised to work on the fake dating obikin fic, first. But I definitely want to return to this in the future. I might sit down to plan this fic, and if it's between 20-40k, I might prioritize it rather than immediately diving into another longer fic (also fake dating AU and fake marriage AU sound roughly similar to me, right? (I promise these are very different fics in so far any of my fics is different)).

Anyway, it's extremely rough. 3.7k under the button:

Anakin shifted his weight from one foot to the other, waiting for the civil servant flipping through flimsi documents. He operated on a pitiful two hours of sleep, three cups of caf, and stress. The civil servant on the other side of the desk, however, didn't seem to realize Anakin's patience had worn thin when mud had dripped into his boots in the sieges on a nameless planet a few days ago.

That was before he was summoned to Coruscant posthaste.

"A most strange phenomenon," the civil servant, a Mon Calamari, muttered. Every few pages, she lost her rhythm, thrown off by the furtive glances she kept giving Anakin.

As Anakin's patience snapped abruptly, strained too far in the stuffy town hall, she found the certificate.

"Here it is," she said, presenting him with a marriage certificate, her webbed hand still on the document, possibly to prevent Anakin from snatching it away.

Recognition swept through him, leaving sour horror in its wake.

"A marriage certificate," the Mon Calamari clarified superfluously. "Signed in your name, General Skywalker."

When Anakin was called to the municipality's town hall, he hadn't known what to expect. Trouble, surely, but he hadn't anticipated questions about his marriage. Reeling on his feet, he nodded. He felt a bit weak, somewhat light-headed, and very ill-prepared to field questions about his marriage certificate.

"Do you recognize this certificate?" the Mon Calamari asked. "We suspect foul play since your partner is not in our database. Otherwise, we will need you to provide us with information on your partner so we may verify their existence. As a Jedi, you may not pay taxes, but this may change depending on the geographical location your partner lives, their income, and possible future plans to move to Coruscant."

As Anakin gawked at the civil servant, the Mon Calamari laughed. They sounded starstruck.

"But let's not get ahead of ourselves," she said. "If the certificate is fake, we will destroy it, of course."

"No," Anakin protested. Reflexively, he reached for the certificate, but surprisingly, the Mon Calamari was faster. Perhaps used to people trying to snatch important documents away, she pulled it back behind the counter, shielded by the plasti shield that separated them.

"Your partner's name?" the Mon Calamari asked, turning to the terminal on her desk.

Anakin opened his mouth, hesitating. Evidently, Padmé hadn't used her name on the certificate, which stung. She hadn't even told Anakin, so he could only shrug helplessly.

"May I see the certificate?" he asked feebly.

"No cheating now, Mister Skywalker," the civil servant chided, already demoting him from General to Mister. Although she still looked at him with wide, sparkling eyes, some of the shine had disappeared.

Apparently, meeting her hero wasn't panning out as she had expected.

Anakin's day wasn't going according to plan either. He was hastily summoned to the town hall, leaving his men in the mud in the Outer Rim. The summons had gone through the Council, and Anakin wondered how much trouble he was in now.

He wavered, uncertain how to proceed.

"The truth, please, Mister Skywalker?"

Suddenly, the Mon Calamari had turned impatient. Oh, it was fine to make Anakin wait over an hour in the foyer before he was called to one of the desks. It was also fine to have him flounder there for an indeterminable time, letting him stew in unease, as the civil servant cleaned her desk, looking for the offending documents.

But taking a minute to deliberate?

That was drawing a line.

Anakin didn't know how to respond. He felt awfully alone, his gaze flicking from the marriage certificate to the Mon Calamari and back.

"I--" he stammered, giving up when his throat closed. His leather gloves creaked as they balled into fists. Was it just his imagination or was the town hall muggier than before?

"I don't know," he admitted eventually, his gaze on his muddy boots.

"You don't know the name of the person you married?" the Mon Calamari asked. They didn't sound surprised. Perhaps this wasn't even the most outrageous thing they had heard today.

"Well, I do, but…"

Anakin wet his lips.

"We take this matter very seriously, Mister Skywalker. If we had not received copies of this certificate, we would never have known. The Senate cracks down on tax evasion, Mister Skywalker. This will result in a hefty fine if you cannot give a satisfactory answer. I cannot help unless you tell me the truth about this marriage certificate."

Anakin floundered.

"Moreover, I should add that your marriage will be declared invalid on Coruscant, and hence all star systems who are part of the Galactic Republic if your spouse submitted a false name. But I must warn you, Mister Skywalker. You were granted citizenship on Coruscant under clause 139a. Filing fraudulent marriage certificates would be a ground to revoke your citizenship. It could even result in prosecution."

Flustered, Anakin shook his head. "I don't know what that means," he admitted eventually. His voice was weak as he considered his options. He didn't know which option would get him in less trouble.

"Are you married, Mister Skywalker?" the Mon Calamari repeated.

"I don't know!" His voice echoed in the hall, making Anakin wince. As he cast a glance over his shoulder, he realized people were looking at him after his outburst. Cowed and humiliated, he turned his attention back to the Mon Calamari.

She gave him an unimpressed glare.

"Then, who are you married to, Mister Skywalker?"

He hesitated.

"Can I make a call?"

"We will have to detain you if you refuse to cooperate, Mister Skywalker."

There were too many options, and somehow, the truth wasn't one of them. Anakin's shoulders slumped.

"Okay," he muttered.

Now, the Mon Calamari looked surprised. Perhaps he wasn't supposed to take this route.

"So, you're married to someone who doesn't exist?" Master Fisto asked, rubbing his hands.

Anakin glowered at him. The clone who had arrested him in the town hall had seen no use in locking him away. Thus, he sat in the police station's waiting room, sulking in a plasti chair until someone would pick him up.

"I must admit it's amusing that your partner used a fake name, Anakin."

Anakin didn't think this was amusing at all.

"It's certainly thrilling. I think you'll be making headlines for the foreseeable future."

The only thing that could make this situation worse was Obi-Wan showing up. Which was why Obi-Wan stepped into the police station, joining Master Fisto.

"Married, Anakin?" he asked pointedly.

Anakin ground his teeth, crossing his arms defensively.

"Do you know who it is?" Master Fisto asked curiously. "You know, I did suspect it was you, actually. It's the type of trick you would pull."

Obi-Wan arched an eyebrow, appearing insulted by the implication he could be married to Anakin.

"I would never use a fake name on official documents," he said stiffly.

Master Fisto hummed.

"Are you done?" Anakin snapped.

"I will settle his bail," Obi-Wan said. With a long-suffering sigh that made a muscle by Anakin's eye twitch, Obi-Wan turned to the front desk.

"You really landed yourself in trouble, Anakin," Master Fisto informed him cheerily. "If the Coruscanti authorities get on your case, there's little we can do for you."

Anakin shrugged feeling awfully like a youngling receiving a scolding. He slouched further into his seat, ignoring the bite of the plasti chair in his neck. Master Fisto sat down next to him, rearranging his robes. The chair was too small for a Nautillian, creaking ominously under his weight.

"The Order will support you, Anakin," he said. Anakin's gaze flicked to Master Fisto, but Master Fisto didn't look away from a water dispenser in a corner of the waiting room.

"You're not kicking me out?" he asked.

"No," Master Fisto answered immediately, appearing bewildered by the suggestion. "Of course not. "You are not the first Jedi to get married. Though I must admit I'm surprised you aren't married to Obi-Wan."

"Why?" Anakin had never considered the possibility -- it was so outlandish that he was halfway convinced Master Fisto was pulling his leg. Yet, Master Fisto shrugged as he seriously contemplated Anakin's question.

This was madness.

Obi-Wan was his Master, a man who had the romantic soul of a clanker. In all the years Anakin had known Obi-Wan, his Master had never shown interest in anyone. Moreover, Anakin was married to Padmé, his wife and angel.

"You've always been close. I can't recall either of you getting that close with anyone else," Master Fisto said.

"Right," Anakin scoffed. "Like literally any other Master-Padawan pair? With all due respect, Master Fisto, it's Obi-Wan you're talking about."

"It's not as far-fetched as you seem to believe it is," Master Fisto defended his scorching hot and incorrect take. "Also, you seem to underestimate Obi-Wan."

Anakin tossed a dubious look in Obi-Wan's direction.

"It's Obi-Wan," he repeated, which should explain everything.

"Indeed," Master Fisto said. "He is plenty popular, Anakin."

Somehow, Anakin doubted it. Master Fisto sighed. "Well then, who is the lucky one?"

Anakin scowled, refusing to answer the question, his attention wandering back to Obi-Wan's back. Obi-Wan was not popular.

After settling his bail, Anakin was escorted to the Council Chamber, Master Fisto and Obi-Wan flanking him, as if he was prone to fleeing.

"I'm not telling anyone anything," Anakin said before the meeting could be opened. Perhaps open hostility didn't aid his case, but he was far beyond surrendering. He had already committed to this farce. He just needed to call Padmé. Then, everything would be fine.

"Skywalker, please don't make this more difficult for us," Windu said, sounding almost pleading. "We need to know how much trouble you are in."

"I'm not telling you."

"Obi-Wan?" Windu asked, turning to Obi-Wan. Anakin froze, belatedly realizing that Obi-Wan somehow seemed to know. Anakin had gone to extreme lengths to hide his relationship with Padmé. While he knew he wasn't subtle or a great actor, he couldn't figure out how Obi-Wan knew.

Panic bubbled in his veins, boiling at room temperature.

Obi-Wan rubbed his jaw, fingers sliding through the bristles, and Anakin realized he would discover how the cards would fall. Would Obi-Wan betray his trust, prioritizing his loyalty to the Council over his former Padawan?

Grinding his teeth to brace himself preemptively seemed safest.

Obi-Wan refused to meet his gaze.

"I assure you that Anakin's visa will be the last of your troubles if you discover his spouse's identity," Obi-Wan told Windu.

"So, what do we do?" Master Fisto asked.

"We prioritize Skywalker," Windu decided on the spot. "Though this turn of events is regrettable, it's no use crying over spilled blue milk."

"It's far too late to pretend someone else submitted the paperwork," Master Mundi pointed out. "Anakin's status as the Hero With No Fear is detrimental. The authorities will want to make a public example out of him. Either we find a more acceptable spouse for Anakin or we must settle this with a fine."

"I'm already married," Anakin snarled.

"Be my guest if you prefer jail time, Skywalker. Perhaps your spouse can visit you during visitation hours."

Anakin glowered at Windu, feeling powerless when the Council members stared him down with such… such malice.

"Let's calm down," Master Ti interjected, smiling winningly. "Master Mundi's idea has merit, Anakin. It's our best -- and your only -- bet."

But Anakin wasn't interested in reason.

"Anakin."

Anakin's head whipped in Obi-Wan's direction. Obi-Wan's voice was brusque, and the Force whispered. He had a bad feeling about this.

"I don't wish to damage your trust. However, if you continue to sabotage yourself, you will put me in a position where I have no other choice."

"No other choice but what?" Anakin ground out.

"To reveal your spouse's identity. I would assume they have plenty to say about this mess."

Anakin hadn't had an opportunity to inform Padmé. Undoubtedly, she wouldn't be pleased to learn their marriage certificate had turned into a legal battle. Yet, that concern took a backseat to the realization that Obi-Wan blackmailed him.

"You wouldn't," he snapped despite fearing that Obi-Wan would.

"I have an idea," Master Fisto said, waiting until everyone looked at him before resuming. "Since Obi-Wan's aware of who Anakin's spouse is, I suggest that Obi-Wan pretends to be Anakin's mystery spouse."

"I would rather not get deported to Stewjon, if it's all the same to you," Obi-Wan deadpanned.

"That could work," Windu muttered. More Council members hummed and nodded, considering this mad idea.

"I concur," Master Mundi added, sounding pleased with this conclusion.

"Wait," Obi-Wan balked, his gaze darting through the Council Chamber. "You cannot be serious."

"People want to buy it. The HoloNews always reports on you together. We'll claim that in the process your name was recorded incorrectly."

"Hang on," Obi-Wan said. "Would that mean that the name on Anakin's marriage certificate gets 'corrected' in my name?"

"I'm not married to Obi-Wan," Anakin protested. "He's my Master."

"Out of curiosity," Master Mundi asked. "Did you get married while you were still Obi-Wan's Padawan?"

In Anakin's periphery, Obi-Wan paled, likely having made a calculated guess, and found the answer unsettling.

"Yes," he said, wondering whether he incriminated Padmé and himself with the answer.

"Then, it's Kenobi's responsibility," Windu decided.

"That's preposterous. Surely, I can't be held accountable--"

Windu raised a hand, which shut Obi-Wan up.

"It's either this or Skywalker's citizenship is revoked. They'll probably toss him in jail, too. You know this is only this serious an issue since Skywalker is famous on the HoloNet."

Obi-Wan's expression turned inscrutable, a mask hiding his emotions.

"Very well," Obi-Wan said. "I cede to the Council's wisdom."

He didn't look thrilled to be wedded, though. Fortunately, Obi-Wan wasn't the only one with reservations.

"Doesn't my opinion matter?" Anakin demanded.

"No," Windu responded.

Anakin frowned, his hands balling into fists by his side. Why was he surprised?

"Then, settled this matter is," Master Yoda said. "Relay the news in the appropriate channels, we will. Await further others, you will."

Unbidden, Anakin turned to Obi-Wan, meeting his frosty gaze. Although Obi-Wan's expression was empty and his shoulders carefully relaxed, Anakin recognized the tension anyway. This didn't bode well for him.

When the meeting adjourned, Anakin planned to rush out of the Council Chamber. He hadn't turned to the door yet when a hand curled around his shoulder. Hesitantly, he glanced over his shoulder despite already knowing whose fingers dug into his shoulder.

"I think it's time we talk, Anakin," Obi-Wan said.

Oh, that tone meant Anakin was in deep trouble. Spending over a decade as Obi-Wan's Padawan had trained Anakin's ears to detect the signs of Obi-Wan's anger. He had never sounded so furious, his voice colder than Ilum's caves.

Anakin barely managed a nod, conditioned to be wary once Obi-Wan's pleasant smile was fake, frozen in place by the dredges of his self-control. Anakin had turned testing Obi-Wan's patience into an art, but he had never managed to drive Obi-Wan so close to the edge.

One well-aimed shove and Anakin would learn what happened when he finally succeeded.

His mouth went dry, and he realized he didn't want to know. Not truly.

Thus, he nodded dumbly.

Obi-Wan's fingers tightened until they hurt. Suppressing a wince, Anakin allowed Obi-Wan to guide him out of the Council Chamber.

"Be gentle with your spouse, Obi-Wan," Master Mundi said as they marched past him to the entrance.

Obi-Wan stopped, seeming to struggle to formulate an answer. Anakin could tell the number of times Obi-Wan was rendered speechless on one hand. Multiple accounts had happened today.

I wouldn't-- He's not-- I will bear your advice in mind, Master Mundi."

Obi-Wan inclined his head before pushing Anakin to tell him to continue walking. Obi-Wan seethed quietly until they reached Obi-Wan's chambers. Anakin's protest that he lived a few floors higher withered on his tongue.

The door closed behind them, the clicking lock awfully loud in the charged silence.

"Married, Anakin?" Obi-Wan demanded. "I knew of your dalliances with Senator Amidala, but married?"

"I--"

"While you were a Padawan," Obi-Wan continued, not interested in Anakin's answer. He paced the room in tight circles, gesturing in agitation. "Stars, Anakin. I raised you better than that!"

"I married her. It's not like I got Padmé pregnant," Anakin muttered, disagreeing with Obi-Wan.

Obi-Wan stopped abruptly, looking paler than a ghost.

"Please tell me that Senator Amidala is not pregnant. Ah-nakin."

"She isn't," Anakin said hurriedly, but Obi-Wan couldn't be stopped anymore.

"From all the irresponsible things you could do."

"I'm not your Padawan anymore!"

"But you were at the time. Why do you think my name will be on that certificate. Fuck. Anakin. We'll be married. Have you even thought about what you will tell your wife?"

Obi-Wan's voice rose in volume until he nearly shouted. Anakin flinched away.

"Well, since this is fake, I thought I could tell her--"

"Fake?" Obi-Wan echoed, and now his voice climbed in pitch.

Anakin hadn't expected Obi-Wan to react so emotionally. Blindsided and caught off-guard, he hesitated. Unsettled, he shook his head, no longer recognizing Obi-Wan. Forcefully, Obi-Wan sighed. Then, his expression settled, the rage seeping away.

"Anakin. That marriage certificate is very real. What do you think will happen when whatever false name Padmé provided is replaced by mine?"

Anakin blinked. He hadn't considered… Did anything change? The names on the marriage certificate had never mattered before.

Obi-Wan laughed, a brittle, bitter sound.

"I see," he said.

Anakin didn't.

He didn't understand Obi-Wan's reaction, but it left him off-balance. He hadn't realized how much security he found in Obi-Wan's steadfastness. The ground was pulled away under his feet, pulling him into free fall.

"Obi-Wan?" he asked weakly.

"You can go, Anakin."

Obi-Wan dismissed him with little fanfare. Ignoring Anakin's presence, he headed into the kitchen, reaching into a cabinet for a cup. He put the cup on the counter with too much force, the slam echoing in the apartment. His movements were tightly controlled as he filled the kettle with water. Nevertheless, each sound was too loud, betraying how strenuous Obi-Wan's hold on his self-control was.

Swallowing with difficulty, Anakin retreated to the door, walking backward.

"Then I'll go," he offered awkwardly.

"That would be for the best."

Nodding, Anakin left Obi-Wan's apartment. His mind reeled with Obi-Wan's uncharacteristic outburst, the angry rant echoing in his mind.

What do you think will happen when whatever false name Padmé provided is replaced by mine?

Padmé remained silent as he explained the situation. However, Anakin knew better than to assume she was silent to listen to his rambling.

"Obi-Wan's very angry," he concluded. "He knows about us. Somehow, he already knew."

Padmé sighed. "Well, I suppose we were hardly subtle. Obi-Wan is close to you, and I consider him a good friend, too."

Anakin nodded.

There was only one thing he hadn't explained yet. He wrung his hands, fruitlessly searching for words to soften the blow. Although Anakin would assure her that nothing would change, he wondered whether Padmé's reaction would be similar to Obi-Wan's. However, Padmé was faster, pinching the bridge of her nose as if she suffered from a migraine.

"I don't know who submitted that paperwork. It was never supposed to leave the villa or exist longer than it took us to sign. The certificate was supposed to be incinerated. Anakin, it was a fake."

Anakin's stomach dropped. Anger churned, mixing with incredulity. His ears rang, and Anakin clung to the feeble hope the ringing had distorted Padmé's words. Alas, he couldn't be quite that naive.

"Why would you incinerate our marriage certificate?" he asked.

"For the same reason I used another name. To destroy all the evidence. What we did was against the rules, Anakin. I would lose my position as Senator if the truth was discovered. Representatives of Naboo in the Senate cannot be married, Anakin."

"They'll change your name into Obi-Wan's." Anakin tossed the truth at her feet, too upset to care about his delivery. He needed to see a reaction. Yet, Padmé only tilted her head in consideration.

Why was Obi-Wan the only one who was angry?

"I will be married to Obi-Wan instead," he stressed, hoping to elicit a reaction.

"I see," she said. "It would look better than a fake name. Less fraudulent."

"Don't you care?" Anakin knew he demanded and pleaded, bargaining for something that wouldn't come.

"Of course, I do," Padmé said. "I never realized you put your actual name on the certificate. Maybe I forgot to tell you. Moreover, I failed to destroy the certificate. It's clear negligence on my side. I do apologize for that."

So, that was what their marriage was? Clear negligence?

Anakin shook his head. "But we are married," he said, so bewildered that his inflection turned the statement into a question.

"In a manner of speaking," Padmé agreed. "Our love doesn't need labels like that, Ani."

Apparently, their marriage was a sham. It had never existed, drafted on paper meant to burn to ashes. There couldn't be evidence.

"Would you ever have told me?" he asked.

"I thought you were aware," Padmé said, always so glib. There was always an answer, the blows of Anakin's accusations deflected gracefully. "But Ani, we love each other. Our love runs deeper."

"I will be married to Obi-Wan," Anakin intoned.

Stars.

His breathing hitched.

"I will be married to Obi-Wan," he repeated, an edge of hysteria bleeding into his voice. Wide-eyed, he stared at Padmé's hologram floating above Artoo.

"Padmé, I will be married to Obi-Wan."

"Yes, you told me," she said, her brows furrowed. "It would serve as a cover for our marriage."

"But what about Obi-Wan?" Anakin asked. He didn't know what prompted the question. Perhaps Obi-Wan anger and obvious reluctance. A kernel of shame sat heavy in Anakin's stomach. Obi-Wan had been so upset, and it was Anakin's fault.

"I don't know," she said, shrugging. "Jedi do not get married. So, you are not hoarding someone else's spot, right?"

Anakin hadn't considered the notion. His heart froze solid in his chest. What if Obi-Wan had saved that spot for someone else?

"I don't know," he stammered.

"I have to go, Ani. My speeder has arrived. I love you."

"I love you, too," Anakin answered mechanically, habit pulling the words from his throat as his mind still cannibalized himself. The call cut, leaving Anakin alone in his room with Artoo. Artoo whistled, and Anakin stared at him helplessly.

He didn't know what to do anymore.

[exonerin]

I'm reblogging my favorite art because Chapter 18 of DAUNTLESS is now posted, and that means we have only one chapter left!

The majority of this final chapter is already written, but life has been extremely chaotic. Still, I aim for Sunday/Monday for that final chapter.

And now, it's time to admire the art. I just love it so much.

Your Nyanakin is so adorable! I love how nyanakin in “DAUNTLESS” is attracted to Obi-Wan’s freckles.

I can’t stop thinking of chapter 4 when Nyanakin first noticed his freckles. that scene was really cute 😭

(Sorry for drawing him as chibi because I don’t have the skill to draw real animals….)

Thank you for sharing your amazing fics!

Thank you so much, @kirab0sh1! I love your art so much. This is the greatest honor I can imagine. Thank you so, so so much.

And look at them! Chibi Anakin is perfect (I love him even better as chibi Nyanakin compared to a full sand cat. It's the best of two worlds (and I'm sure Obi-Wan agrees)). He's so adorable, and he has the sand cat markings, too! Also, Obi-Wan's freckles are precious. They're both sad, wet, pathetic cats (though Anakin had taken this a bit more literal than Obi-Wan).

I love it so much! Thank you so much for bringing Nyanakin and Obi-Wan to live. I love your art-style so much. It's so cute it squeezes my heart and makes me smile in the best way possible.

[exonerin]

He just wanted to look cute! 😭

[exonerin]

grocery shopping for day 9 of happy gay people :]

[exonerin]

I love this so much! Only the Team could ever embarrass both themselves and everyone around them so thoroughly. Everyone is petty, and I love it.

It also reminds me of a (very different) WIP I have lying around.

Someone (Palpatine) has unearthed the marriage certificate of Anakin Skywalker and submitted it to the Coruscanti government.

Anakin Skywalker immediately gets called to the city council hall to explain. Because a) the other person on the marriage certificate does not exist and b) this is tax fraud.

Of course, Anakin fumbles himself through this exchange, and he lands himself in deeper trouble. Now, his citizenship is at stake. If he has committed fraud by never submitting to the Coruscanti government that he is legally married, which annuls his Jedi exemption and means he owes the state a large sum of a money, he will get deported.

This is problematic for the Jedi Order. Anakin still refuses to explain himself because he promised Padmé he wouldn't tell anyone (also, he's hurt she apparently used a fake name).

he Council, in their wisdom, decide that the best way to protect Anakin is to pretend that he's married to a Jedi and that in transport the other name got butchered. Because marriage to another Jedi would land them in another obscure exception, so Anakin is safe. Obi-Wan's the lucky one. Coincidentally, Obi-Wan's also the only one who has realized Anakin is actually 'married' to Padmé Amidala.

Oh, and he's Stewjoni.

So, if anyone discovers this is also fake -- even more fake than the name on Anakin's marriage certificate -- they'll both lose their Coruscanti citizenships. Obi-Wan is not pleased. Anakin is angry that Padmé apparently used a fake name.

When he contacts Padmé she explains that the document should have been destroyed. She doesn't understand why it ended up on Coruscant instead. She will look into it (and uncover Palpatine). They aren't actually married by the way.

Unfortunately, it's too late for Anakin to backtrack and claim the marriage document he has been very cryptic and oddly protective about is fake.

(My favorite part so far has to be the Council looking at the situation, realizing Anakin was still Obi-Wan's Padawan at the time of signing, and deciding that Anakin is Obi-Wan's responsibility. Therefore, he is the logical victim for their 'save Anakin from deportation' plan)

midnight can’t sleep thoughts:

au where anakin and padmé go public with their marriage, maybe during the war maybe it’s after the war and it’s finally safe for them to reveal, everybody is shocked, obi-wan feels especially betrayed, the jedi order is like ???? uhm excuse me

but then!!!!!! one of the senators for a planet that obi-wan and anakin previously aided reveals that!!! by god, the anidala marriage cannot be recognized as valid because obi-wan and anakin are currently married on that planet and their marriage supersedes/nullifies this new one because it was never annulled!!!!! they’ve been married for (insert number) of years!!!!! (idk galactic ruling that recognizes planetary marriage as valid for the whole galaxy to save couples from having to remarry each other every single time they go to a new planet!)

sudden record scratch; come again? obi-wan kenobi, legally married to anakin skywalker? in secret? the galaxy is shook, the Team is confirmed married? holonet is losing their shit, padmé is gobsmacked and hurt

anakin is frantically trying to convince her, no angel, that’s not true! i never married my master—i would Know if i was married to my master—we never even touched each other! obi-wan is near catatonic from this whiplash in news, what do you mean he’s been married to his padawan this entire time!!!! the council is just watching this like a tennis match

probably one of the clones, rex or cody, brings up that one mission to this planet where in order to respect the cultural practice, obikin allowed themselves to be married by ceremony so they could proceed in getting the government to trust them and actually allow their help blah blah blah. it finally sinks in and obikin are now recalling the exact mission and how awkward it was for them to spend the night together in that ceremonial sleeping area, surround by people expecting them to consummate, and the awkwardness that followed them for months after they left the planet….

“wait—master, i thought you said you were going to petition for a divorce after we left that planet!”

“i did??? i thought the paperwork went through???”

“i don’t remember signing anything!”

anyway, bureaucracy failures and also there was a War going on, the divorce papers never made it back to court or approval, they are still legally married, and that means anakin and padmé’s marriage is null and void. but that also means anakin is legally obi-wan’s husband. which is a thought that spins around anakins head so dizzyingly, it cannot be processed.

ok, well that’s fine, they can just submit for a divorce now, padmé reasons, and since they’re finally public, they can have the dream wedding anakin’s always dreamt of!

except, now the jedi order wants to have words with anakin. and now, anakin is unable to let go of the concept of being obi-wan’s husband.

now, obi-wan refuses to sign the divorce papers.