faenemy

[faenemy]

one time i told a guy with a huge punisher decal on his car that i loved the punisher but that i'm too scared to have any of his merch because in the current political climate i wouldn't want people to think i support killing police and the man had. no response whatsoever. he was smiling and completely frozen in place. i'd never seen anyone bluescreen that hard

do with this information what you will

[faenemy]

girl dad

[faenemy]

bruce and dick, father and son? classic. batman and robin, partners in justice? exciting. bruce and dick, brothers with a huge age gap? more likely than you think.

-

Jason: *loses in a game against bruce*

Bruce, patting his back: it’s alright son, let’s play again

Dick: *loses in a game against bruce*

Bruce: that’s for calling me old

Dick, screaming at Bruce: HOW COULD YOU?!

Duke, new to the fam, very concerned: what’s happening?

Tim: you don’t wanna know

Duke, nervous: …is it something really bad?

Tim, gravely: yes

Dick, shaking Bruce: HOW COULD YOU?! HOW COULD YOU DRINK MY SMOOTHIE?!

Duke:

Alfred: *pointedly looking at the broken window*

Bruce: dick did it

Dick, in space, on call with Alfred: i wasn’t even anywhere NEAR there

Cass: fuck!

Bruce: language

Steph: let my girl say fuck

Bruce: language.

TV playing in the background: ..nd SCORE! unfortunately, the Gotham Guardsmen have lost to Metropolis Metros once m—

Dick, from the couch: motherfUCKER

Bruce, angrily: metropolis BASTARDS

Cass:

Cass: not fair >:[

In a restaurant

Barbara: dick can you pass me the salt

Dick, with headphones on, not hearing her:

Barbara: dick? dick. dick!

Bruce: ill get it

Bruce: *reaches for the salt near dick’s plate*

Dick: *suddenly has his arms around his food, his fork clattering to the ground, their drinks spilling everywhere*

Bruce:

Dick:

Barbara:

Dick: ...in my defense these are some real good nachos

Dick: *waltzes inside bruce’s room, not saying anything*

Bruce: ...?

Dick: *looks at the pictures on the walls*

Bruce: can i help you??

Dick: *checks himself out in the mirror*

Bruce: please do that in your own room

Dick: *turns on the lights and rummages in the drawers*

Bruce: i already ate all the snacks there

Dick: *leaves* *doesn’t close the door*

Bruce:

Damian, also in the room:

Damian, in realization: jason got it from him

[faenemy]

by our powers combined....

[faenemy]

"hoverboard" and it's just a motorized skateboard. "evil AI supercomputer" and it's just algorithmic plagiarism. "self-driving car" and it's a fucking tesla

[faenemy]

[faenemy]

picturing a roman empire equivalent of reactionaries who say "if you don't like it here then move somewhere else"

[faenemy]

this is literally the funniest plot twist in any form of media ever

[faenemy]

Forged in the flames

[faenemy]

got eaten up with 3 words

[faenemy]

maaaaan if you put the youth of today into some kind of old style situation they would struggle but adapt over time much like those of the past.

[faenemy]

15 years of training dragons!

(We will ignore that I am a day late!) Both teethlesses deserved to be here (_3_)

[faenemy]

[faenemy]

[faenemy]

-source: Detective Comics #83-

Weapon of Choice: I am only posting this because I have had garbage sleep and I busted out laughing when I read Dick's line. For those who don't know, he's referring to a raincoat and rain boots, but now rubbers is slang for condoms. Remember kids, words can change their meaning as time goes on -u-

[faenemy]

the tsa stops me because my carryon had too much liquid and they open it and its just full of blood

[faenemy]

Old Yeller just parried the bullet