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the funniest thing in the entire pirates of the caribbean series is definitely that one scene in At World’s End where they have parlay but davy jones is part of it, and rather than have him stand in the shallows or something they get a big bucket of water and have in stand on it on shore

who thought of that idea? who thought “put davy jones in a bucket of water” and had the guts to suggest it aloud? and then who went “hey that sounds like a great idea!”

at some point someone told davy jones their idea was for him to stand in a bucket of water and he agreed to it

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Unmute

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Why do billionaires look like a seventh grader’s first sculpting project?

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“Bakugou and Tokoyami” 2019.01

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ATTENTION ALL OF TUMBLR!

THIS IS AN URGENT MESSAGE.

IN 2014, IN SCHAUMBURG , ILLINOIS, USA

THERE

WILL

BE

A

TUMBLR CONVENTION!!!

THESE ARE THE WONDERFUL PEOPLE THAT ARE MAKING IT HAPPEN

SIGNAL BOOST THIS GUYS

I WANNA SEE EVERYONE THERE!!

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Marshadow marshmallow treats!!!! (⁎˃ᆺ˂)

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Yesterday upon the stair by @pitviperofdoom

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Chapstick

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hey man, you wanna hear a joke?

you bet you do.

so how- wait for it, wait for it- how do you measure a snake?

in inches! because- hang on- because SNAKES DON’T HAVE ANY FEET!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

get it??

meet the Green Vine Snake, a reptilian wiseguy found commonly throughout much of Asia that looks like it just thought of a really corny joke and it wants to share.

eh-he-hee, no feet… that was a good one

reaching lengths of about five feet, the Green Vine Snake lives primarily in the trees, hence its name. it feeds mostly on frogs and lizards, presumably after it has joked them to death

HEY HEY GUYS what river do snakes love best?? the HISSISSIPPI!!!

the snake is only moderately venomous, but has a disturbing habit of going right for the eyes if grabbed. so maybe don’t do that.

I have no EYE-DEA how you could think such a thing of me! these jokes keep getting cornea and cornea!

so the next time you’re walking though mainland Asia and a green noodle slithers out of a tree, tells you the worst joke in the world and then tries to bite your eyes out, you’ll know who the culprit is. 

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This Pitbull gave birth and she put all of her puppies in her owners lap 

Bye I’m crying 😩❤️❤️❤️❤️

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The Pressures of Passing 🚶‍♂️ (W/ @tallykat3)

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Cursed Image

I’ve been drawing too much bishies so I practiced designing some anime girls.

So I chose Mt. Rushmore

sorry america

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Black and White painting  by Bob Ross

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christians: god is formless, god can come across as anyone or anything

person: god might be a woman

christians:

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poyo

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every time i listen to “you’re a mean one mr. grinch” i can’t help but sit there and think “what did the grinch do to hurt you?” because dude just stands there for 2 minutes and 58 seconds and drags the grinch into the dirt