faleesia - Tumblr blog

[faleesia]

Sometimes I think about when I told my ex that I think Midoriya is autistic and he said that was “a crazy headcanon”. I think about it and laugh. Look at him…

[faleesia]

If I could always just write about how much better my life would be if I never had to interact with cisgendered/allistic people, I could probably make a living off of it

[faleesia]

Im actually doubling back on this post, and I'm party going to make it about race. If that bothers you then you can move along I guess. People who identify as transgender are an oppressed people. Id go as far as to say in some circles that they're oppressed even within the queer community.

As a Black person, I very often find that when [white] people are part of an oppressed group for the first time, whether that be because they're of a religious group or because they are a part of the lgbtqia community, that they have a hard time deciphering what it is pertaining to their identity that qualifies as oppression, the same way they had a hard time identifying when they themselves are oppressing people. A lot of the transgender people in that thread, from what I saw, were [white]

I think that this plays a part in the concept of why they can't understand that people can value sex over gender without being transphobic. Those two sentiments can be separate.

While I think the original post is genuinely harmful to transgender people within the lgbtqia, and is a post that creates a safe space for people who don't value gender expression to be transphobic, I don't personally see people who value sex over gender as inherently transphobic.

I think that most people who identify as transgender {maybe excluding trans-med people (who l dislike)} would say that they value gender over sex. The reason a transgender person may "value" sex is if they choose to only date other trans people, often to avoid potentially transphobic partners. Valuing sex over gender as a cisgendered person does not make you transphobic. Denying that trans people can value gender over sex without invalidating your sexuality IS transphobic. But, nobody should be trying to "force" cis people to find transgender people attractive.

Saying that the trans identity in itself is inherently harmful to Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, etc people is transphobic rhetoric. It's not about your lack of attraction. It's about your active and intentional exclusion, and the encouraging people to participate in said exclusion.

TLDR; you can say "I prefer to date based on sex rather than gender" or "I prefer to date cisgendered people because I value the sex of my partner" and not be transphobic. But you have to think about the context of that statement, and how you phrase it. Because saying "transgender people are inherently harmful to queer people who don't value gender expression" encourages the exclusion and oppression of transgender people. And if you do intend to isolate transgender people from the rest of the queer community based on your personal experiences with transgender people and their opinions on the importance of sex vs gender... idk, maybe you are transphobic?

[faleesia]

Ok but

•gentle, tickly back kisses

•add in nuzzling for maximum effect

•especially torturous on that bony spot where your neck meets your back, the small of your back, the back of your rib cage, or just literally anywhere tbh

•the perfect combination between sweet/playful/cuddly and absolute hell. Like I will pay someone to do this to me but also I will start crying like thirty seconds in

•you can also mix in some side tickling if you’re feeling extra mean but you didn’t hear it from me

•just…tickly back kisses!!!

Thank you for coming to my TED talk

[faleesia]

I guess I have to make this post too, if you’re a trans person and you think “genital preferences are transphobia”

Why? Maybe I’m too asexual to understand but… why?

[faleesia]

Okay, I apologize for not understanding the context. I, personally don’t think that preferring to only date cis people as a cis person is transphobia. If your reasoning is “that’s just my preference”. However. When you [op?] insinuate that transgender people maybe don’t deserve to be in the same conversation as queer people, excluding them from queer spaces, thats a problem. If your reasoning for not wanting to date trans people is that you don’t think they’re valid or that they’re not real men/women or that their non-specific gender isn’t valid, THATS a problem.

Because we can clarify that the idea that all people who wouldn’t date a trans person are transphobic is a bit dramatic. And we can do it without excluding trans people from the general umbrella of queerness because of what I only HOPE is a vocal minority.

Did any of that make sense?

[faleesia]

This is why I don’t trust cisgendered people who are attracted to women/non-men unless I know them well. The idea that I have to have the right body parts or present the right way or I don’t deserve this or that or I’m a danger to blah blah blah oh for the love of all things queer and good shut the fuck up

[faleesia]

Im like. Positive that there’s no anti-trans queer people that follow me, but just in case! This is your cue to like . Go somewhere else. Trans people aren’t trying to convince you to be attracted to them. I personally don’t want anything to do with cis people when it comes to attraction or relationships. I love being a trans person that only interacts with other trans people. And if you’re a cis person who only dates or engages with cis people that’s fucking awesome! See how we can both mind our own business?

[faleesia]

Fixed the image for you <3

And the crazy part is that you can value sex over gender without invalidating people who disagree

[faleesia]

When you bother them just so they can tickle you and so they say "this is what you wanted right?" And you say "nohoho" through the giggly laughter but in your head this is exactly what you wanted all along but you aren't going to admit it of course

[faleesia]

Im taller than you if I squeeze your sides

[faleesia]

My state ID says 5’7 but I’m actually 5’6 and some change…

Who voted 5’5.

[faleesia]

And more on that last RB:

Cuz I’m a person who’s had to learn to change their language because this is so true.

Very often I would say similar sounding things to people with the best of intentions, that of taking accountability.

“I’m sorry that I haven’t been good to you”

“Im sorry that I wasn’t good for you”

But it’s important to understand the context of a situation. If you’re delivering an apology, nobody should have to make you feel better about how you may have messed up or hurt them.

[faleesia]

If your apology involves degrading yourself, calling yourself shit or insulting yourself, its not an apology, try again.

[faleesia]

Indigenous peoples of the great plains should've never told white people about tornadoes. "I don't know man that shit never happened before you showed up"

[faleesia]

Poipole is really just the tickle monster Pokémon let's be fr.