fandomjumper247

[fandomjumper247]

:(

[fandomjumper247]

Imagine if getting core mental trauma was somehow audible or visible. Like you're already having a bad day and you're trying to wrangle two toddlers and a bag of groceries and work was ass and then you hear the sound of something shattering and you just know that one of your kids' emotional core and sense of basic safety just fucking broke and you can't even tell which one it was.

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I'm glad that people are still having fun on tumblr even after we found out about the frightening ghoul that reblogs posts but doesn't say anything

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Just a little PSA for all our mental health (and chronic pain*) spoonies out there! A lot of doctors neglect to mention this little side effect, which means a lot of us are suffering extra from the heat without knowing why.

*Many psych meds are used to treat chronic pain as well, if you didn’t know!

[fandomjumper247]

Top Deadly Allergy Humor

The peak of comedy for me as someone with a deadly allergy is constantly not having my EPI-pen on me. And every time someone finds out, they’re like, “You have an allergy you should always have that on you.”

“I know.”

“You need it, your allergy could kill you.”

“I know.”

“Why don’t you have your EPI-pen with you all the time?”

*shrug* “Too much to carry, don’t want to.”

*cue confused rebuttals*

And just about every time I eat something new and forget to ask about my allergy (majority of the time) I’ll be like, ��huh hope this doesn’t kill me, guess we’ll find out,’ chomp.

Immediately: “Well do you have your EPI-pen?”

“Nope.”

And then the above.

The loop is infinitely hilarious to me every time🤣

[fandomjumper247]

"I have a peanut allergy"

boring. exposes a weakness. makes you look weak and feeble.

"peanuts are my arch nemesis"

intriguing. gives you depth and a mysterious aura. shows that you are powerful enough to have something trying to put a stop to your ambitions.

[fandomjumper247]

People without food allergies really don't get it huh

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HEY BRITS. YOUR MUSTARD PRODUCTS MIGHT BE CONTAMINATED WITH PEANUTS!

[LAST REPORT: 22 OCT ‘24.]

FGS Ingredients Ltd is taking the precautionary step of recalling a number of spice products that contain mustard, because they may contain peanuts which are not mentioned on the label.

You can read the list of products and the batches/date guidelines that are contaminated HERE

I will list some effected brands here, but I am not perfect, I MAY MISS SOME, or more may be added after this post! You still need to check the FSA list!

Wilton Wholefoods

Waitrose

Hampshire Foods

Mr Vikki’s

Fireaway

Domino’s

Westmorland Family Butchery

Chef Select

Legendary Sauce

Favourit

Dunnes Stores

Papa John’s

FSA ADVICE IS TO CHECK FOR THE SPECIFIC PRODUCT AND BATCH AGAINST THEIR LIST, AND IF YOU HAVE A CONTAMINATED BATCH, DO NOT EAT.

NOTE: Stores SHOULD give you full refunds, so if food insecurity / ‘I don’t have enough to afford wasting this’ is a concern, you can get the money back at the retailer you bought it from!

[fandomjumper247]

People who are lactose intolerant give so little fucks they will just chug down a milkshake say their stomach hurts a bit and carry on with their day meanwhile you have people with peanut allergies being like: "if any of the ingredients of this meal have been in a ten mile radius of a nut you'll have to stab this needle in my leg with the force of a kid trying to get the straw in their capri sun or I die"

[fandomjumper247]

I’ve been looking for some recipes to share that’s good for dietary restrictions. “Why?” You may ask.

Well, it’s because I’ve been thinking about potlucks. Neighborhood block parties. About people coming together and feeding each other and enjoying each other companies and having fun.

But anywho, I’m thinking of putting them all on one post. Except for this particular article because unfortunately America Test Kitchen has 2 free articles per month for people who don’t subscribe to them. So while I’ll still post the link, I’m also having the article underneath the cut. Enjoy the food ideas to share with others!

Recently, I hosted a four-day gathering for nine people with 10 different dietary restrictions. To say I was worried would be a vast understatement.

We had everything: no gluten, no meat, no dairy, no mushrooms, and much more. All had varying degrees of importance from “just a preference” to “just in case, do we know where the closest hospital is?” 

Many restaurants are aware and accommodating of dietary issues, but it can be difficult when this problem arises at home. You can’t make different dinners for everyone.

We’ve compiled a list of suggested meals and preparation styles to cook for a crowd where everyone—including the host—enjoys the dinner, feels included, and stays healthy. 

(But first, an important disclaimer: There's more to cooking for people with special diets than just choosing a recipe. If you're cooking for someone with severe allergies, make sure they're comfortable with your serving setup.)

Spread-Style Meals That Offer Ultimate Flexibility 

My coworkers are food lovers and problem solvers. When I asked them what they would serve in this scenario, they all had the same answer: DIY-style meals offer the most flexibility for the diners and the least amount of stress for the cook.

Build-it-yourself meals allow people to select what foods work for them and avoid the ones that don't, without putting the responsibility on you.

For tackling this kind of meal, we suggest taking inventory of all guests' allergies (and the level of cross-contamination they allow) and then creating a themed dinner with choose-your-own elements. Make sure each person has at least one option at every step.

Here are a few of our favorites:

1. Build-Your-Own Bowls

Bring Sweetgreen home by making a couple plain bases, a few simple proteins, and some roasted veggies, and ending it all with a topping and sauce bar.

Bases: Everyday White Rice, Foolproof Oven-Baked Brown Rice, Quinoa Pilaf with Herbs and Lemon, Basic Farro Pilaf 

Proteins: Pan-Seared Chicken Breasts, Garlicky Broiled Shrimp, Teriyaki Tofu, tempeh steaks, sautéed eggplant with plant-based meat

Veggies: Skillet-Roasted Carrots and Parsnips; Skillet-Roasted Broccoli; Kale with Garlic, Red Pepper Flakes, and Lemon; Roasted Sweet Potatoes 

Sauces: Hummus with Smoked Paprika, dairy-free green goddess dressing, Roasted Garlic Chimichurri, Lemon Aioli, Tzatziki Sauce, Red Pepper–Almond Sauce 

Toppings: Microwave-Fried Shallots, shichimi togarashi, Microwave Cheese Crisps, Gim, Chili Crisp

2. Make-Your-Own Pizza

Whether you have an indoor or outdoor pizza oven or you simply make them on the grill or in your oven, making your own pizza is one of the easiest DIY meals because it mostly just requires the host to chop toppings and stretch dough.

Almost all ingredients can be store-bought, but if you feel like elevating the experience with a few homemade options, we have some suggestions.

Dough: Classic Pizza Dough, gluten-free pizza dough, thin-crust whole-wheat pizza 

Sauce: No-Cook Pizza Sauce, Basic Pizza Sauce, Perfect Pesto, alfredo sauce   

Toppings: Caramelized Onions, pepperoni, roasted vegetables, anchovies, Spicy Honey, dollops of homemade ricotta

3. Burrito/Taco Bar

For this simple spread, make a variety of proteins and vegetables, buy any additions, have a few homemade salsas on hand, and let your guests decide whether or not to use flour, corn, or other types of GF or dietary-specific tortillas.

Fillings: Plant-based chorizo, shredded chicken, sweet and spicy fried fish, grilled steak, bean and vegetable

Salsas: Fresh Tomato, Roasted Tomato–Lime, Salsa Roja, Quick Tomatillo, Mango-Mint, fresh corn and avocado   

Additions: Tangy Apple-Cabbage Slaw, Bell Pepper Slaw, Chipotle and Pepita Guacamole

Single Recipes for Multiple Dietary Requirements

When you don’t want to prepare an entire spread and instead just feel like making one dish that has several dietary accommodations baked in, we have some options for you.

I asked my coworkers: Whether vegan, vegetarian, soy-free, nut-free, gluten-free, or peanut-free, what do you make when trying to accommodate multiple diets?

1. Japchae 

This was my go-to meal when cooking for my large, dietary-restricted crowd and it was a hit. The base noodles, Korean sweet potato noodles, are naturally gluten-free and hold onto sauce really well. To keep the dish gluten-free, I used tamari instead of soy sauce which generally contains wheat. To accommodate a pescatarian and someone with a mushroom allergy, I just cooked these elements separately and left them on the side for people to sprinkle onto their own plates.

Who It’s Good For: Those following dairy-free, gluten-free, peanut-free, tree nut–free, soy-free (using tamari), vegetarian, and vegan diets.

2. Breakfast Casserole 

Essentially a crustless quiche in a baking dish, a breakfast casserole is great for a varied crowd because you can swap any protein, vegetable, or spice in or out depending upon your group's dietary needs. One of our members raved, “One of us is dairy-free, the other has celiac, so this was perfect to please everyone."

Who It’s Good For: Those following dairy-free, gluten-free, soy-free, peanut-free, tree nut–free, or vegetarian (provided they eat eggs) diets.

3. Red Lentil Soup 

This soup is spiced, rich, and nourishing because of the thick texture and nutrients that simmered red lentils bring. To make this a complete meal, pair it with a hearty salad and serve dressings on the side.

Who It’s Good For: Those following gluten-free, dairy-free, peanut-free, nut-free, soy-free, vegetarian or vegan (if you use vegetable broth instead of chicken broth) diets.  

4. Vegan Barbecue Tempeh, Mushroom, and Bell Pepper Skewers

Tempeh is an awesome, naturally gluten-free (most often; check your brands) vegetarian protein for grilled skewers. You can add any vegetables, or even fruit, to your skewers and the same glaze can be used for any meat skewers you make separately.

Who It’s Good For: Those following gluten-free, dairy-free, peanut-free, nut-free, soy-free, vegetarian or vegan diets. 

5. Walkaway Ratatouille

Most ratatouille recipes call for labor- and time-intensive treatments like salting and/or pressing to remove excess moisture from the vegetables. Not only is this meal largely hands off and fuss-free, but it's also ready in under an hour, and it’s chock-full of vegetables while accommodating some of the most common dietary restrictions.

Who It’s Good For: Those following dairy-free, gluten-free, peanut-free, tree nut-free, soy-free, vegetarian, and vegan diets.

6. Falafel

Like a cross between a spread meal and a single dish, making falafel the centerpiece of your dinner allows you to provide lots of pita, sauces, and toppings on the side for people to choose from while you only have to cook one main element. Though this recipe uses all-purpose flour, an equal amount of chickpea flour can be substituted for a gluten-free version. To accommodate this substitution, we increase the water.

Who It’s Good For: Those following dairy-free, gluten-free, peanut-free, tree nut-free, soy-free, vegetarian, and vegan diets.

7. Chili-Spiced Chicken Thighs and Potatoes

This recipe is a great example of a jazzed-up protein that is still widely applicable to different dietary needs without sacrificing flavor. It can serve as a complete meal as is, or for a vegetable element you can add some simply dressed greens on the side.

Who It’s Good For: Those following dairy-free, gluten-free, peanut-free, tree nut-free, and soy-free diets.

8. Best Prime Rib

Provided your guests eat meat, you’re in luck. Though this is technically a plain protein, there is nothing plain about a centerpiece-worthy prime rib. Serve it with any vegetable sides, salads, or potatoes to round out the meal.

Who It’s Good For: Those following dairy-free, gluten-free, peanut-free, tree nut-free, and soy-free diets. 

9. Chicken Shawarma 

Instead of going out for shawarma, we were able to create a home version by using the broiler and boneless chicken thighs. Chicken shawarma allows guests to assemble their own pita pockets with as much or as little sauce and vegetables as they desire. To accommodate more diets, make roasted tofu as a vegetarian option and provide gluten-free pita.

Who It’s Good For: Those following gluten-free, peanut-free, tree nut-free, and soy-free diets.

Allergy-Friendly Swaps We Love

Sometimes a recipe is so close to fitting your restrictions but doesn't quite work because of an ingredient or two. We have a few standby swaps that are typically fine in small amounts without significantly altering the overall recipe.

* Swap tamari for soy sauce when you need to be gluten-free.

* Swap sunflower seed butter for peanut butter when you need a peanut- or tree nut–free alternative. 

* Swap vegan, non-dairy milks for cow’s milk. We like oat milk when baking due to its higher sugar content and almond milk in savory applications because it is more neutral. 

* Swap garlic or onions for garlic oil when alliums can cause an issue, such as with the Low FODMAP diet. 

[fandomjumper247]

Consider:

Victorian England: 1837-1901

American Old West: 1803-1912

Meiji Restoration: 1868-1912

French privateering in the Gulf of Mexico: ended circa 1830

Conclusion: an adventuring party consisting of a Victorian gentleman thief, an Old West gunslinger, a disgraced former samurai, and an elderly French pirate is actually 100% historically plausible.

[fandomjumper247]

Nice people make the best Nazis. Be mean, be tough, have a fascist tooth/skull collection.

[fandomjumper247]

if you're writing and find yourself thinking 'this is too weird/gross/offputting/esoteric/ambitious/catered to my specific interests + sure to push away a broader audience' that is the devil speaking and it is a lie. you are already firmly on the right path and you need to double down

[fandomjumper247]

ok this is “earring magic ken” who was introduced in 1992 (and discontinued shortly thereafter)

basically mattel had done a survey and discovered that girls didn’t think ken was “cool” enough

SO someone had the bright idea to research coolness by sending people to raves which, at the time, were mostly hosted & attended by gay men. so they went to these raves and took notes on what the fashions were and finally landed on this outfit, mesh shirt & all 

this doll became the best selling ken doll in history, mostly because gay men bought it in droves. (many of them said his necklace was supposed to be a cockring) but mattel and a number of parents weren’t very amused and discontinued the doll 

[fandomjumper247]

daily reminder that

i love you

stay hydrated

there's something resembling my father standing in the parking lot outside. it's tapping its bare knuckle against the post of a flickering streetlight & gesturing into the darkness behind it with its other hand. sticking its thumb out over its shoulder like it's telling me we have to go. i texted my sister about it & she said to stay inside & lock the balcony door. the knocking got louder when i did.

[fandomjumper247]

Fun fact!!

This image was deemed sexual explicit. The post was removed and replaced with this:

Fuck this site

[fandomjumper247]

"READ MY DNI" no. use your block button like an adult. i'm not scrolling through the many-paragraphs-long pinned posts of every blog i reblog something from. if you insist certain types of people aren't welcome in the notes of your posts then it's your responsibility to curate that. or choose a closed social media platform like facebook or instagram. or go and live in a barn away from humanity if you really don't like sharing the world with people who are different from you