flowersnteacups - Tumblr blog

[flowersnteacups]

the flesh is unwilling and honestly, the spirit isn't too keen on the idea either

[flowersnteacups]

It's like this all the time

There are two pools of water. One is called "Thinking", and the other is called "Doing".

The Thinking pool is full of wriggling, live fish. And if you want to do anything, you have to carry that live fish over and release it into the Doing pool.

All you have is your cupped hands to carry that fish - a fish that does not want to be scooped up. A fish that resists, wriggles, and jumps while you try to carry it live and whole to the other pool. Every task you want to complete, every idea for inspiration, every action is one of those fish.

If you don't catch the fish, it doesn't get done.

If you drop the fish, it doesn't get done.

If you accidentally smother the fish, it doesn't get done. And then you feel terrible.

Some days, the pools are near each other. Some days, the fish aren't as hard to catch. But some days, the pools are so far apart and the fish are fighting so much and it takes everything you have. But you do it, because you have to. It takes all your concentration to hold, carry, and anticipate the movement of that fish, and after you release that fish you're so tired.

They only count how many fish are in your Doing pool at the end of the day. "You caught enough fish! You don't need help! You're doing fine!", and you cry but they don't understand why.

Everyone else has buckets and nets. They don't understand why you think it's so hard.

[flowersnteacups]

Raise your hand if you have also been personally victimized by the barometric pressure changes 🥲

[flowersnteacups]

Apparently people who don't have executive dysfunction think that actually working on something is the hardest part of doing something. And that's why they get mad that you call the rest of the project "easy" after you've finally worked through doing the plan and know what to do when you're working.

So when you're through with the epiphany of how to make it physically possible to make the thing you're making, and you're sharing the plan with excitement, because the hard part is over, and now you only have to get your hands moving and do it, they get mad at you like

"it's not that easy! It's a lot of hard work! >:C"

they mean it, because

to them, working is the hardest part.

They don't have to fight their brains to get started. They don't have to fight their way through making the choices, making the plan, making yourself make the thing. People who don't suffer from executive dysfunction think that the hardest part is actually doing the thing.

[flowersnteacups]

[flowersnteacups]

Gentle reminder for myself:

"No" is a complete sentence. Use it often.

Today’s advice from your Goth Auntie

Stop slouching, drink some water, take your meds.

"No" is a complete sentence. Use it often.

The Cursed Object went splashing in puddles, but now hasn’t found a form to shift to that isn’t still damp. 

❤️ Auntie Jilli

[flowersnteacups]

[flowersnteacups]

Neil Banged out his tunes today, on a train you have the comfort and relaxation to bang out your own tunes

[flowersnteacups]

Baddest girl :(

[flowersnteacups]

Air biscuits

[flowersnteacups]

So I was taking some trash outside last night at like 4 AM, because I had a spoon or two and it needed to be done.

And I hear loud, insistent, repeated meowing.

Which I then follow.

And there's a kitty down the street between two of the neighbor houses sitting and looking entirely forlorn and, and shoves her entire head into my hand to pet.

And I go "I should get this poor kitty some cat food - it's cold." and the cat FOLLOWS ME TO THE DOOR.

So I wake up @lynati - who'd gone to bed about half an hour before but was not properly asleep - and say "Hey, can I have some cat food? There's a kitty."

And Lynati was like "I wanna see the kitty." and scampers out of bed. We bring the cat food over, she eats some of it, and then she shoves her way into the front door.

SO ANYWAY.

So we got one of the spare litter boxes downstairs, and locked her into the kitchen, so the other two cats can't get at her, and she can't get at them and cause problems.

So we're going to find out if she has People or not and see if she's microchipped (and get her tested for various communicable problems), and if not I'm keeping her and naming her Astraea.

She got upset when I tried to leave the kitchen and tried to follow me, even though our other roommate was there.

[flowersnteacups]

[flowersnteacups]

may god forgive my wretched sins (spent money)

[flowersnteacups]

"disability only exists because the world isnt accessible" idk how to tell you this but chronic pain still hurts

[flowersnteacups]

The most ferocious inhabitant of the Far East is the Amur tiger....😘🐯

[flowersnteacups]

We bought our new sweet kitten a harness for walks. We had her try it on to get her comfortable with it and I’m not sure she loved it. 

(Source)

[flowersnteacups]

Sorry, I haven’t done my work, yeah, I’m in spoon jail. Yeah, I was in really bad spoon debt, and I stopped paying my spoon taxes. Yeah, I can’t do anything until I gather enough spoons to pay my spoon bail.