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[hc] [mewlsar] [mostly gaius thoughts]

dusting off this blog because i have headcanon text that is too much to be screenshot and shared as images 😂

I have most definitely talked about this before but I want to talk about it again!! It is very long-winded lol

I've been thinking about the progression of feelings from Gaius's perspective...

His first run in with Makoh'to, unbeknownst to Gaius, was during the XIVth's take over of Ala Mhigo. Not much here except Makoh'to was around to aid in helping some people escape. I have a comic I never got around to finishing where he strikes Gaius's gunblade off kilter from afar to ensure the safety of a few people. At that time all they could make out of each other was a vague silhouette... perhaps Gaius returns a shot and Makoh'to carries a scar as a reminder. Maybe a rain of arrows to distract Gaius and his soldiers and he is gone, along with the people he was helping flee... h mm.

Makoh'to is mostly a thorn in his side. I need to become more acquainted with 1.0, but Gaius does remember the miqo'te once he sees that familiar figure. Still wandering, still helping people it seems. Atp Gaius just thinks Makoh'to is naive, foolish, a bleeding heart for sure... which is useless to him. And he will pay back Makoh'to tenfold for his little act back in Ala Mhigo. Cue the attempt to kill him in 1.0 lmao that's canon for now!

Still funny to think Gaius could recognize Makoh'to would do what was needed to ensure Eorzea wasn't completely obliterated in 1.0. Like, Gaius knew between a rock and a hard place, Makoh'to was going to ensure Eorzea was at least still around even if it may still fall into the hands of the Empire. I think around this time Gaius starts to wonder more about Makoh'to's personal motivations and starts to build on his ever growing admiration of his rival. Carries into ARR/2.0. I'd love to expand more but it's more or less Gaius becoming increasingly confounded by the Warrior of Light who could harness his power to "aid" in Gaius's cause but chooses to... just be a naive fool and "help everyone". Gaius still has opinions in present-day about Makoh'to saying "yes" to most requests he gets without thinking about the political fallout LMAO

Gaius in Prae asking Makoh'to one last time to join him... it's a sign of utmost respect in a very peculiar way - despite thinking Makoh'to is a fool, perhaps he will be a fool the Empire could use. That he could use... there is no romantic feeling here tho. He's still trying to wrap his mind around how Makoh'to does what Makoh'to does. He's seen Makoh'to fell primals, his fellow countrymen, so many things... it's almost bordering idolization. But Makoh'to's terse rejection keeps him from crossing into that line. Like that rejection is a confirmation, yes, he is an absolute fool and not worth the time. Actually, it's more like he hate-idolizes the Warrior of Light. Not that Gaius knows ANYTHING about Makoh'to. He's never seen Makoh'to smile or laugh up to this point. And my god he won't until 4.x patches - and it STILL won't be at or because of Gaius

So my live / die comic where Makoh'to answers he didn't leave Gaius to die in Prae that day, he just let him face the consequence of his actions? Yeah, the beloved Warrior of Light known for being a silly lil guy really said that! He's had front seats to Gaius's shitshow for the past couple decades. (I imagine Makoh'to goes where help is needed.) While Makoh'to still holds onto the belief people can change, he's seen that has not been the case for Gaius who is nearing 60 at this point... so why would he help him then. Of course Makoh'to pities him at this point. I imagine during one of their earlier talks about Prae when they are on speaking terms (4.x or 5.x) that Makoh'to mentions that he DID pity Gaius at that point. And it would sting sooo much for Gaius to hear that.

Even during 4.x patches Gaius doesn't get to see Makoh'to's full range of joy. I mean... most of his friends seem to be in a coma with no signs of getting better. He's kind of stressed out of his mind. Gaius does get to see Makoh'to be vulnerable tho? And how he preservers in the face of uncertainty for the sake of his friends. It starts to humanize Makoh'to to him, in a sense. He is still the Warrior of Light, but he also is a guy named Makoh'to Mewriyo who cares very much for his friends. Gaius cannot even fathom being acquaintances with the WoL, but it's still eye opening to him? Like... this is the guy that defeated him multiple times. That's the guy and he's dealing with more crisis than anyone can imagine. Gaius has been keeping up with Makoh'to's exploits since 2.0. Not to an obsessive degree, but... he's definitely up to date on the details. He doesn't get it. This guy is nobody to anyone, yet trouble finds him at every corner and the miqo'te just rolls with it.

Then 5.x stuff happens and Gaius doesn't know nearly as much about the events of Shadowbringers, but he's recognizes the thousand yard stare Makoh'to has sometimes when no one is looking. Asking for the Warrior of Light's help feels... incredulous. And the fact Makoh'to says YES feels even more so - but Gaius expected Makoh'to to say yes given the circumstances. He would also understand if Makoh'to said no - or actually, he wouldn't. Not given everything else Makoh'to has said "yes" to... but Gaius doesn't dwell on it at all lol

Then the oddest thing happens - Gaius finds himself lost in thought and pensive as the events of SoW unfold and... the Warrior of Light is trying to comfort him? It feels alien. And unearned. But Makoh'to doesn't coddle, and he doesn't push. He just checks in on Gaius from time to time and assures him that they will do everything they can to rectify the situation. Makoh'to is also one of the few people who is not berating Gaius (at the moment) for his hand in all of this. Gaius almost wants to ask why, but he's got too much on his mind to pursue the thought.

This time Gaius can accept Makoh'to's pity. He feels conflicted about it though. He wants it, but he knows he's not deserving of it either. Gaius doesn't feel like he is on equal footing with Makoh'to and realizes he was never on the same level. Not even close! And that it was arrogant of him to ever think that.

The events of SoW wrap up and Gaius has much to deal with... Makoh'to and Gaius's relationship does not progress very far during this time, but Makoh'to has offered the olive branch of some sort of friendship if Gaius is ever in need of an ear and shoulder to cry on. Gaius still doesn't get it - he does not understand why this miqo'te would go so far out of the way to listen to him after everything they've been through together. But he'll remember the offer.

And what do you know, Makoh'to does come back to Terncliff to check in on him and Allie. At first it seems Makoh'to is mostly there for her, but the miqo'te makes time to check in separately with Gaius. Their conversations are very short at first and superficial - Gaius can tell Makoh'to is letting him control the depth of their talks and he appreciates it. NOW by this point Gaius has seen a genuine smile from Makoh'to and it was directed at HIM!! Gaius feeling seen by not his former adversary, but this kind old miqo'te... and yet it's not a romantic feeling that blooms in him lol. That still takes a while :3c

[Addition: During this time is when I imagine Gaius FINALLY letting it all out in Makoh'to's arms. He doesn't mean to break down crying in the arms of his former adversary, but he does and he can't believe how gently he is being held by someone he hardly knows.]

They find themselves chatting longer and more, about mundane things, philosophical things each time Makoh'to visits. And those visits become more frequent. Makoh'to's letters, when he can not physically check in on Allie and Gaius, are addressed to Allie but include snacks and trinkets to be shared with her father.

Gaius has to do a lot of introspection once his own feelings DO start feeling a bit more than that of a friend. He STILL feels odd having a friendship with Makoh'to. He's double thinking about if it's remnants of his old adversarial respect warping into an "inappropriate" affection. Like he's not trusting his own feelings, especially after having everything he ever believed in turned on its head, so like... doubly so. I think it's cute if Gaius kind of turns a bit awkward because he's actually thinking too much of this. And by this point Makoh'to IS putting the moves on him in the form of gentle physical touch and tender little smiles.

I don't think Makoh'to is Gaius's first anything, but it has been Some Time since he was last wooed. And the fact it's Makoh'to is... making him question his own sanity. This is where Gaius in my lore is always like "Of course everyone is mildly attracted to the Warrior of Light, that is natural" when he is just trying to work out his own feelings lmao

Just a lot of that goes on until Makoh'to makes his own feelings VERY obvious that Gaius HAS to confront it. I've always imagined it as Makoh'to mentioning, "If someone were to kiss me under the moonlight, that would be okay with me n_n" while sitting with Gaius at the lookout 😊it may not even happen that night but Gaius gets the greenlight to return those feelings haha

Then from there they get to know each other in a romantic sense! There's a lot of talk around the nature of their relationship, the seriousness of it, the potential fallout if the WoL is with the man formerly known as the Black Wolf... how Makoh'to can reconcile being with someone who has such a horrible history. You know, a lot of things.

And the rest is history :) I hope I can continue to draw and write bits and pieces of their relationship to share with everyone! o7

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Title: Pretty Word Count: 240 words Rating: G Characters: Gaius Baelsar, Makoh’to Mewriyo (WoL, mentioned) Additional Notes: It's established GaiusWol lmao but not much context is needed to understand what's going on. This is more of a character introspection.

You're so pretty, Makoh'to had said with a gentle smile once upon a sunset.

Gaius turns the word over in his mind. Pretty. He understands what pretty means. What he did not understand was how he could be pretty. He had been called many things in his life: bastard, handsome, brute – hunky, even – but never... pretty.

He stood before the sink mirror now, turning his head slowly from side to side hoping to catch a glimpse of what prompted his partner to feel this way. The calloused tips of his fingers ghosted over the beginnings of his beard, leading his eye to trace along his jaw. The creases framing his mouth bowed outward when he frowned in confusion.

Without realizing it, he had narrowed his eyes to take in his image. Gaius caught the deep wrinkles of his brows come together in the reflection. His eye bags had become more apparent over the last few days – the committee had been working tirelessly on carving out details regarding future Ala Mhigan trade – and the wrinkles that outlined them only served to emphasize his exhaustion. He had since sprouted new gray hairs. Not that anyone could discern them from the crown of grays he already wore.

Pretty.

Makoh'to is pretty.

Gaius stood back to look over his reflection once more.

Despite everything, Gaius turns away from the mirror as a small smile appears on his lips, he thinks I am pretty.

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Author Notes: I just think about Gaius being caught off guard a lot by his partner's doting, ok... He's never been loved so sincerely 🥺

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Art trade from 2022 with @fourteentheart! Beach time

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Reblogging here just in case! :3

[Shop Update!]

Three (3) days left until preorders close this Saturday Nov 11 around 11:59PM CT (I assume I will be awake drawing something and can close the shop if I'm not zoned out haha)

I can ship to most places around the world. :3

Check out what's up for preorder here: https://andloveyoushallfind.etsy.com

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I put together a Cait Sith (FF7) glam for a party and I ended up liking it so much I made this lil video to showcase it. Ft. Makoh'to in his Aerith (WHM) glam.

The cast of FF7 but they're played by my WoL :thinking:

I didn't care about leveling AST before but now I'd do it just to wear this glam for the fortune telling aspect lol

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I AM ABSOLUTELY BLOWN AWAY WITH THIS SCULPT COMM!!!

Working with this artist was a DREAM. It was so easy to provide some quickly drawn revisions and have the artist follow them! I got updates every week on progress without asking for them, too! Great communication, great work, great everything!! There's a waitlist for work but it's definitely worth your while to get on it if you're able. 10% deposit required to secure your waitlist slot, but this artist is on TOP of it.

This is my second sculpt from them, the first being a full body scale figure of Makoh'to. :3

You can find the artist at the links shown on the picture or start on instagram (<-- you can click it!) to see their work!

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Makoh'to using Kardion on you!

I like to imagine a lot of his sage moves are more organic looking (i.e. not the digital feeling effects), incorporates more heart motifs and loose dancer flourish!

(As a reminder all my drawings can be found @fourteentheart but I post screenshots, videos, headcanons, and writing here sometimes!)

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I decorated a tiny section of the Werlyt FC! :)

Dynamis - Maduin - Goblet W8P13 if you'd like to visit in-game!

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A little White Mage video featuring one of Makoh'to's shards. :) I tried out a new camera trick aka someone had a tip on how to slow down the keyboard turning lol. I also wanted to weave together one animation from different angles to create a bit of a quicker pace. :0

The LB3 even has her staff... T_T

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A usual day in Terncliff for Makoh'to. Learning to make little videos was a detriment to my work productivity, but a boon to my creativity lol

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Tossing my videos here for archival purposes.

Miqo showing off the FAMILY PORTRAIT!!!

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Having a very normal one about them on a vacation at the beach house. This was going to be much shorter but then... (It takes a long time to record enough for this long ok!!)

Guess who learned how to scale and use customize+ today lol

(There's royalty free music!!)

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6.4 Tataru's Grand Endeavor

FULL SPOILERS, INCLUDING IMAGES!! A complete live blog of my progressions through the quest.

Proceed at your own risk. I won't cypher it with rot13 since it's behind a read more. Hopefully no one gets spoiled unintentionally. ;v;

PLEASE DO THE WERLYT TATARU QUEST BEFORE YOU READ THIS I BEG YOU!!!!!

A miqo picture so the other image doesn't pop up and spoil ppl lol

I'm come down, relatively, from the thrill of it all. Two separate quests... no follow quest, which would have been disappointing if uhhh not for EVERYTHING ELSE THAT WAS GREAT!!! I am so pleased and I'm not just saying that because of what we got at the end of it all. :)

However. I cannot believe--

OK. Henceforth will be my live blog reactions bc that's fun to chronicle! I hope you can derive some joy from it too. Fair warning, I curse a lot out of excitement. Gibberish. It's pure joy. You will NOT understand this if you haven't played the new quest yet LOL

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Up at 5AM for these two… like a long nap after going to bed at 12:30AM lol. Waiting for patch to dl! It seems to have finished early, but I am in no rush!! My recording software is set up. :)

MILITARY EQUIPMENT??? Gaius’s “brother-in-arms”…

OUTFIT THE TROOPS AHHHHHHHHHHHHjsa

f

;asdjkfal;ksjdflkjaskdfsadf

GOING TO SEE HIS HUSBAND FOR REAL!!!!!!!!!

MIQO KNOWS WHERE TO FIND HIS HUSBAND HEHEHE

I’m gonna frow up

me being able to crime tools gpose him wherever I want (still takes the time to gpose)

they are married

He really has changed!!

EXCUSE ME SOMEONE STOLE THE G-SAVIOR???????

AVILINA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHH

Other business = see his husband, but Gaius is very shy

HUHHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOO

Aww I love when he kneels to talk to children

NOT THE CLOUD DECK !!! gpose time……….

HOLY SHITTTT U;MDFJDJ I’M LOSING MY MINDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD (post blogging: it was a fake out. it's ok tho lol)

Miqo can drive better than Gaius :)

support from the rear, huh……………………….

FUCK I AM SO READY LET’S GOOOOOOOOO

SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP

WHERE IS ALLIE THO… HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

NERO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nero is mad at the bottom accusations.

THE SYMBOLISM……….

EVERY TIME I SEE MIQO AND GAIUS IN A CUTSCENE TOGETHER I WANT TO FROW UP (AFFECTIONATE)

me constantly checking for allie. Severa is no where to be found… neither is vald...

checking all the npcs for flavor text… one lady moves around now!

Aw baby you know Makoh’to will help you anytime, anywhere!!

HOLDING HANDS TIME

OMDasdfkj I’M GOING TO FUCKING EXPIRE

hehehe she sure does!!

just know my face has been like :D this whole time

Aw… Miqo is good at soothing children so it’s ok!!

I am crying

CRYINGGGGGGGGG

I MF CUKING DLKJSDKLFJLKJSDF IDM”A I MA MSLDKDJSJDK

I’M LEGIT GOING TO FROW UP (AFFECTIONATE) NYTKLSDLFK MY HEART IS RACING SO FAST RIGHT NOW I DFKLJKSDF I CANNOT EVEN OH MY GODDDDDDD PLEASEEE LET IT BE THE ITEM WE GET

I”M GOING FO CUKGING ODIM

I AM FOR REAL FUCKING DYING RIGHT NOW I AM LOSING MY FUCKING MIND

I”M FOIGN IDI” I”M CRYING AHAHAHAHAA THEY HAVE NEW OUTFITS I AM DIYGOLINSDKFSDKLFJLKSDJFL:KSDJFI:LOJSDLK:FGJSDL:KFJDSLK:FJSDLKFJildsf

I CANNOT FUCKING DLBNELKJSDKFJDF

THGIUS IS MORE THAN I COULD HAVE EVER ASKEDDDD

IF THEY DON’T LET ME HAVE GTHAT PROAISLDFJDFJD SFI”MG OING FDSL:K

NEW PICTURE TO ADD TO MY WALLET

waiting for the sun to rise so I can take better gposes… simmering in this feeling……….. letting it wash over me………… I’m guessing we will not get this portrait as our reward but I am so happy it happened all the same. Family picture real………………………………………………..

THEY????????? DID THEY GIVE IT TO ME????????????falskdfjl;kasjdfkl;jasdlfkjasdf

TGHEY DIDDLFDKSJFLKJDS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I am in disbelief……………..

WAIT HOLD ON I FORGOT TO GO BACK AND LOOK AT IF THEY HAVE NEW FLAVOR TEXT AND--------

GAIUS IS SITTING ON THE BENCH I ALWAYS GPOSE THEM ON AND HAVE LORE FOR I"MF LSKJDFLKSJDFKLJSDFKLJSDKLFJKLSAJFKLDSJFKLJSAKLJDFSDKF AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Allie's overlooking the sea...

FINALLY SEV AND VALD!! They even have new flavor text!

i am so happy........t his is more than i could have dreamed

feel free to talk to me about this on twt in dms! i don't have much to say except keyboard smash.

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I really just made a video to Oh No for Gaius, yep... (there is sound!)

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I just saw this! Oops! If I’m doing this as Makoh’to... fitting, I suppose!  But he wouldn’t be so melancholic about it lol

Tagging: @forgetsrotation and anyone else who wants to do this.

Generally better done by getting into your character ;)

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I've wanted to make a little music video for Rex to The Black Wolf Stalks Again for the longest time. Uh, this is my AU Rex who lived. :D

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(SOUND WARNING - there is music!)

A video I put together from a little art/dance party I "hosted" (aka was there lol) - Super fun! We also had a drawing room mural. :D It made me super happy to see ppl partake in the drawing room!! ; v ;