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Art trend? Art trend!

(Yes, the individual images are tops turvy - but I've been turning and tilting the canvas so often that I eventually forgot which way was up ^^°)

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Lucanis Week Day 4 - Family, Enemies, Contracts

Honing in on the "Family" part with some Ceres & Lucanis fluff :) (and some Angst, but sometimes, those conversations are important)

Read "Family" on AO3 or under the cut! (ca. 2.5 k)

The headache that had begun some time around noon still hounded Lucanis on his way home. He felt weary, wrung out, and stiff from spending most of his day around a desk. In short, he was painfully reminded why he had never coveted the title of First Talon in the first place. Fortunately, he had something to look forward to now. The tension in his shoulders began to ease when he closed the door behind him with a soft click, and he felt a rush of warmth spreading through his chest when he spied Rook reclining on the chaise in his — no, their — reading nook. "Welcome home!" Her smile was radiant like the sun and he would never, ever, get tired of this. "Hello, Ceres." An answering smile pulled at the corners of his mouth as he bent down to kiss her — just like that, as if it was the most normal thing in the world — before flopping down next to her and burying his head in her lap. Big sigh, to let go of the day's frustrations, and then a deep breath, to fill himself with the sweet smell of her. It had been a week since she moved in, and it still didn't feel entirely real. Going to sleep with her warmth in his arms, waking up to the scent of her favourite soap infusing his sheets — their sheets. Watching her traipse around the apartment in nothing but one of his shirts, making breakfast with her arms around his waist, feeling her unravel with his name on her lips. Taking a nap with his head in her lap and waking up to her playing word games with Spite. An Us instead of an I.

The book she had been holding landed on the side table with a soft thudd and her hands began to comb through his hair, the soft scratch of her nails on his scalp sending a shiver down his spine. "Long day?" "Mhm." Spite started purring at the back of his mind, and he would have joined him if he had the capacity for it. He couldn't help but turn into a puddle when she did this, all tension bleeding away to leave nothing but the feeling of her gentle touch. It didn't matter that there was still an invasion to deal with, that there was a small mountain of documents awaiting his review and signature, or that half of Antiva's Crow houses probably considered plotting his downfall. Here, he felt safe. Home.

"Tell me about it?" Another sigh, eyes still closed, and he shifted just enough so that he could speak clearly. "So much paperwork. It's like half the city has something for me to sign, my contract negotiatior wants me to readjust my rates, Caterina wants to redecorate the west wing, Viago wants to plan the liberation of Antiva, and there's a small mountain of contract proposals awaiting my judgement." He could hear the grin in her voice when she answered. "Well, you did say you wanted to make your own decisions going forward." "I feel like there should be a grace period going from no decisions to all the decisions." Her chuckle jostled his head, just a little, but somehow, his headache didn't seem to mind. He rolled onto his back to look at her, a smirk stealing over his face. "Maybe you should be First Talon. You're much better at making decisions than I am." "No thank you. Firstly, I am still on vacation, and secondly, I think I'd rather not be head assassin. I prefer not to do some petty nobles' dirty work for them."

Lucanis felt his smirk fading as comething clicked in his mind. "You … don't approve of of my work." It wasn't a question, not really, not when her face pulled into a grimace. And suddenly, the tension was back, coiling into a lump in his stomach. "I … it's complicated?" He remained silent, waiting for her to continue. Not that he'd know what to say, not when he felt a thin thread of fear snaking around his lungs, robbing him of breath. Fear that she would finally realize that this was a mistake, that she deserved better than this, better than him. Fear that she'd leave. Some of it must have shown on his face, for she moved her hand to cradle his face. "Lucanis, I love you. None of this changes how I feel about you, ok?" He nodded mutely, and she smoothed her thumb over the frown that was etching itself into his brow again. "It's more abut how I feel about myself. Most of the Crows' contracts come from people with money, yes? People with enough coin to spare to not mind spending some to get rid of a pesky rival or some such. Well, I don't like the thought of money deciding over life and death; of some rich asshole getting to decide who lives and who dies." "They don't get to decide though; we decide which contracts we take." His voice sounded rough to his own ears. "Sure, but are you going to tell me that compensation doesn't play a role in that decision?" No way to argue with that. She sighed, thumb brushing gently down his cheek. "I mean, I get that it shouldn't be cheap. That it shouldn't be easy to buy someone else's death. It's just that I know that all too often, it's more than affordable for exactly the wrong kind of people. And I know that if you wouldn't do it, if the Crows didn't take these contracts, they'd find someone else. I'm pretty sure paying for murder has been around longer than the Crows. And Maker knows I've been perfectly happy about all those Venatori you took out even before we met, and that I've done my fair share of killing. So I'm not really in a position to judge. It's just — complicated."

She wasn't wrong, and he couldn't blame her. If anything, her very idealism — her strong moral compass, her dedication to do better, to leave the world better than she'd found it — was something he admired about her. He lifted his hand to touch her face, brushing a lock of hair behind her ear, fingertips lingering on her skin. "So where does that leave us?" Almost proud, that his voice didn't shake. He didn't know if he could do this if she left. Her lips twitched into a lopsided grin, at odds with the unhappy frown on her her face. "Same place we've always been — trying to figure this out, one step at a time."

They had never really talked about it before — what they imagined their life to look like after saving the world. He hadn't even had the courage to ask her if she would stay with him until they had reached that after. What if the shape of their lives outside of the end of the world didn't fit together? If there were edges they couldn't smooth, differences they couldn't bridge?

A moment of silence, as he tried to gather his thoughts. "Would it help if I showed you? The contract proposals, the process, everything?" She hesitated. "I .. don't know? That's the thing: I'm not sure if knowing more would make it better or worse. I very much remember your offhand comments about your training, for example, and I have opinions about treating children this way. I've spent some time teaching children, and the mere thought of withholding food or water or hurting them to somehow make them learn better makes my skin crawl and my fingers itch to shake your grandmother by the ears." His turn to chuckle; he could very well imagine Ceres berating Caterina. He'd had ample opportunity to observe her regard for authority, or lack thereof. "I mean, seriously, who does that? To their own family?" He sobered. "She wasn't always like that — well, that I know of — but after house Velardo … it changed her. How could it not? She wanted to make sure we'd survive." "I guess living through the murder of all your children would do something like that, yes." Her voice grew quieter, her frown deeper. "I spent a long time resenting her for it, too. But I made my peace with it years ago, and I don't think I would have survived the Ossuary without her training." Her frown softened. "Yeah, well, I guess I can't very well resent her for that. I am rather happy to have met you." The knot inside his stomach eased, at least a little, and he couldn't help but return her tentative smile. But she wasn't quite done with her ire yet.

"But still, I just — I mean — would you torture your own children like that?!" He blinked. "My own … " Eyes widened. "Are you … ?" And his mind went blank. "What?" Her turn to blink, then stare as realization set in. "No! I didn't mean — that's not —" Her face flushed a bright red, and he could feel the same heat rising up his neck. "I'm not pregnant — that I know of," she muttered. Silence, as they both fough with an entirely new wave of panic. "Is that … something you'd want?" She evetually asked in a small voice. Cautious, curios. Afraid. Lucanis was afraid, too — that there was a right and a wrong answer to give. Couldn't really look at her as he struggled for words. "I … don't know. I've never thought about it." Had never really thought it was an option for him, that he'd ever find someone he'd want to be with in this way, someone who chose him in return. The tight ball of fear in his gut was for losing her, depending on his choice. The layer of anxiety above that belonged to the risk of losing her — losing any family they chose to build — to Crow politics, much like he'd lost his own family. But there was hope there, too. Anticipation. Excitement. "… but yes, I think I would. Like that. With you." Whispered words, tinged with nervousness, as he glanced up at her. "If that is something that you'd want, too." Her cheeks were still flushed, and her eyes shone like stars, a little too bright to be entirely dry. "Yes, I would." More of a breath than a voice, and he forgot to breathe for a moment. "I'd like to make a family with you."

And then he rose, twisting to face her, almost tumbling off the couch in his rush to kiss her, hands cupping her face as he swallowed her breathless laughter. Something wet licked at his thumbs and there were tears pricking at the corners of his eyes and it didn't matter, because she didn't want to leave, she wated to make a family with him. His balance shifted — the world shifted — and he had to grip the backrest for balance as he caught his breath, resting his forehead against hers. "Maybe not immediately though. I think I need to figure myself out first," she admitted between shaky breaths. "I'm not going anywhere. Take all the time you need." He could feel her smile on his skin, her fingers curling into the hair at the base of his neck, into the fabric of his vest, and then she kissed him again, pulling him down with her, arching into his touch. I love you, said his lips on that soft spot just behind her ear. I want you, said her fingers tangled between the buttons of his shirt. We're okay, said their mingled breaths.

She may not have wanted to try for children just yet, but she didn't mind the practice.

—

They made it to bed eventually, after dinner and a bath that ended with perhaps a little more water on the floor than absolutely necessary. Just as Lucanis was beginning to drift off, his arm around Ceres' hips and his face pressed into her side, he felt Spite gently nudging him aside. Fine, but don't keep her up when she gets tired! Under his demons grudging assent, he allowed himself to be claimed by sleep.

Rook! "Hello, Spite." She smiled down at the demon's glowing eyes, running a hand through his hair. She knew he enjoyed this just as much as Lucanis, and his purr was oddly soothing. Will you. Explain? "Explain what?" Why. Were you afraid. Before? Ah. "I wasn't sure if Lucanis wanted to have children of his own, some day. I do. And that is something I can't do alone. If he hadn't, I'd eventually have needed to decide what was more important to me." More important? "If I cared more about Lucanis, or about starting my own family." But we. Are family! "You are," she agreed. "But it's … a bit different, with children." Why? "Because … well, you've met Lucanis family; they're … complicated. My family isn't much better, though at least none of them have tried to have me killed — that I know of. Children are easy. They just love you, and you love them back. Until they're old enough to want to define their own life, at least. I really want that, this sense of unconditional belonging." But Rook belongs. To Us! Her eyes crinkled at the corners as her smile grew across her face. "I know. And I am so, so happy about that. But I'd still be sad if I had to give up on that other dream to stay with you, so I'm very glad that Lucanis wants to make a family — a bigger family— with me, too. I've seen other relationships sour because one partner was forced to give up something important to them, and I wouldn't want to end up like that." For a moment, he grew quiet, gears visibly turning in his head as he mulled something over. Lucanis was scared, too. "… What was Lucanis scared of?" She knew she shouldn't ask, shouldn't cheat by encouraging Spite to divulge thoughts and feelings that Lucanis hadn't be ready to share. But she had never been good at turning away from knowledge, understanding. Besides, she was never quite sure how much of their little chats Spite passed on to Lucanis later, so maybe it balanced itself out. That Rook. Would leave. The demon sounded strangely forlorn. Her expression softened. "Oh, Spite. I don't think I could ever truly leave Lucanis — and you." Not even. For children? "Not even for children. And from what I understand, there are plenty of Fledglings I could take under my wing. Maybe I'll collect my own little flock, to completely infuriate Caterina. I bet I could make things better for them, too, even if I couldn't do that for children of my own." Maybe she'd do that anyway. She really didn't like what she'd heard about Crow training, and restructuring and overseeing that might give her something to do. Taking a vacation was nice and all (and certainly necessary after the year she'd had), but she'd never been good at sitting idle. Lucanis probably wouldn't be happy about the way Spite grinned at her, gleefully anticipating many a prank on his human's grandmother. He'd seen enough of the aging Crow matriarch to learn that while she was certainly determined, she was also no fun at all. It didn't help that he wasn't allowed to speak in her presence, making him particularly spiteful. Ceres scratched ligtly under his chin, watching his eyes drift close, but then he rallied, looking at her expectantly. Will you. Read a story. To me? She chuckled, reaching for the book she'd begun reading to him. "Alright, but just one chapter."

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People I'd like to get to know better

As @elishnord so kindly tagged me, have some random facts about me for a change ;)

Fun fact: I nearly bit off the tip of my tongue when I was ... 4, I think? You can still see the scar.

Last song on repeat: Prooobably Takedown from K-Pop Demon Hunters - I usually listen to self-made playlists though.

Currently Watching: Rewatching The Apothecary Diaries.

Last Movie: Moana 2 (I wanted to check out the soundtrack)

Currently Reading: Hemlock & Silver by T. Kingfisher (and fanfic, of course)

Currently Playing: Replaying BG3, because Veilguard is uncooperative atm :/

Sweet/Spicy/Savoury: All of them in turn :)

Relationship Status: Happily married!

Current Obsession: Still Lucanis / Rookanis. Fingers crossed it stays that way until I've finished all my fics + sequel(s) ;)

Last Google Search: Carnival attractions

Currently Working on: A Beginner's Guide to Breakting Curses (Rookanis fairytale AU) and Lighthouse & Lattes (working title for that modern AU). And maybe a few more Between the Lines bits down the line.

Gently tagging @queen-of-seventeen and @gloaminghagette and @nelsynoo :)

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WIP Wednsday

Eh, why not, I can do another post if the lovely @queen-of-seventeen goes to the trouble of tagging me ;)

Let's have another random bit of that modern AU I keep teasing, shall we?

There's a storm warning for the next week, but that doesn't stop Rook and Bellara from enacting phase one of project 'giving Irelin a taste of her own medicine' (Codename: Hummingbird). Though it does help that they don't have to leave the dorm to do that. Bellara has written a love letter from a "Mysterious Stranger" who has become enamored with her old flame. She's working with the benefit of actually knowing what Irelin likes, and who doesn't love a handwritten letter? It wouldn't do to have Irelin recognize her handwriting though. Fortunately, Hawke is more than happy to pitch in and copy the letter. Unfortunately, Hawke's handwriting looks like chicken scratches, so Aveline has to step in and repeat the exercise.

Edit: I keep forgetting to tag people, don't I? ^^°

@dreamywritingdragon and @jenn2d2 and @sageadvice, let's go!

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Lucanis Week Day 3 - A Moment's Peace / For Love of Treviso

Today's entry is a reference to my own extension of A Moment's Peace, because that date ought to have been longer.

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Lucanis Week Day 2 - Ossuary / Lighthouse

I doubt Lucanis ever was an easy prisoner. (Technically comes before Spite, I think.)

As a free add-on, I *did* already write two drabbles for both the Ossuary and the Lighthouse a while ago, respectively;)

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Tech-related mini-rant

I wanted to start another Veilguard paythrough, as you do. This has never been a problem before; I've had excellent performance with my chosen settings and the mods I've been using on my PC since launch.

Now, the game suddenly crashes to desktop every 15 minutes. Am I using higher settings than my Nvidia control center wants me to? Yes! But again, i've been doing this since launch without any issues.

Yes, I have updated my GPU drivers; according to the error messages I get, that driver might be part of the problem. But it wouldn't run before that update either! I hate this! (I've also updated Frosty, because the first thing you check is always the updates.)

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Lucanis Week Day 1 - Spite / Determination

Technically, I'd want to post this *after* the Ossuary one, because I feel like they go in that order - before and after Spite.

Anyway, I feel like the first time Spite manifested would probably have been pretty traumatic (even if they were negotiating their contract in the middle of that).

They were waiting for him to burst out of me like a moth from a coccoon

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Five Sentence Someday

Right, I meant to do this! The lovely @serensama tagged me, so have ... uh ... a pieve from the latest fairytale chapter I'm working on!

"Didn't you say that fortune tellers would try to tell you what they think you would want to hear? I … can't imagine most people would be too happy with that kind of prediction." At that, her lips twitched into a smile. "I don't imagine they would, no. But it was compelling, wasn't it?"

There, that's suitably unspecific ;) Busy playing DnD, so I'm skipping the tags, but I bet we'll all have LOTS to post next week :D

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New chapter up! In which the party resumes their journey, only to be caught in the rain.

Snippet:

Lucanis was just inspecting the structural integrity of a rickety chair when Rook called out to him. "Hey, Lucanis? You're still carrying that waxed tarp I bought, right?" "Yes?" When he turned to look at her, she was in the process of peeling off her outermost tunic. "Ah, what are you doing?" "Getting out of my wet clothes. If I'm lucky, the oiling on my bag held and I still have a mostly dry spare shirt. Could you spread the tarp over the ground in front of the fireplace? This place is filthy, and I'd like to avoid sitting on moldy splinters." Rook wasn't the only one taking off her soaked garments - Davrin was already shirtless, and he could see Taash working to unlace their tunic as well. But somehow, he couldn't pry his eyes from Rook's hands as they slowly unraveled the ribbon holding her second tunic closed. "Lucanis?" He dragged his eyes up to her face again, feeling his own flooding with warmth as he noticed her smirk. "The tarp?" "Right. Sorry." It felt safer to turn his back on her, anyway.

Once spread out, the tarp was large enough to fit them all (minus Assan) if they sat close together. Which might become a problem, because the rest of the group had spread most of their clothing over the remaining furniture to dry by now, and he had not been prepared to see Rook in nothing but her underwear, smirking in Lace's direction while she rummaged around in her pack. He knew he shouldn't be staring (and somehow, the fact that Lace and Taash were equally bare didn't pose an issue at all), but he couldn't tear his eyes from the smooth expanse of her skin, small moles scattered over her arms and shoulders like a constellation of stars, growing sparser as his eyes followed the curve of her hips.

Touch her kiss her hold her.

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Thank youuuuu <3

Now, who am I obsessed with lately? Off the top of my head, 3 faves:

I just noticed that The Trials (and Tribulations of Falling for the Dellamortes) by the lovely @karinamay has a frankly criminal low number of hits so far, when it is an utterly delightful modern law-school Rookanis AU.

Death and the Bridegroom by the incredible @gloaminghagette has me biting my nails even though I know the twist and we all know where it is headed - peak pathologically clueless Rook and first class yearning <3 (Post-canon Rookanis)

All My Friends Are Sad & Bright by the talented @sorrygoldfish is an utterly lovely modern coffee shop AU and I swear it's just coincidence that I binged it just before I started actually doing something with that modern AU design document I had lying around XD

Spread the love!

Mini-Quest

[ ] Leave a nice message on a fic you read long ago [ ] Send a nice tumblr message to an author you’ve read recently [ ] Reblog & rec a fic more people should appreciate, @ the author if possible

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Would you believe I have all my (5 or 6, depending on how you're counting) Lucanis week entries already locked and loaded? So excited <3 @kabsey kindly tagged me, so get a(nother) taste of my day ... uh... 5? Entry :D (I had trouble choosing a snippet, because it's all adorable.)

They end up at a small café near the museum. Probably at least half a tourist trap, but it's close, the wind is cold, and the cake display does look enticing. "You know cake doesn't really count as lunch, right?" he comments after they've ordered. "And coffee isn't really a lunch drink, either, but here we are." She's having hot chocolate, reinforcing the idea that you don't have to give up on the things you liked as a child. Or maybe she just has a sweet tooth. They talk about their week, and which paintings they liked best, and then their order arrives. There's something about the way she savours her first bite, closing her eyes and humming happily, that goes straight to his core. He can't seem to take his eyes off her when she wipes her lips with her thumb and licks the last stray crumbs from her fingers. Like he wouldn't mind helping her with that.

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New Chapter up! In which In which Lucanis, Rook and Lace have a nice dinner at Taash's place and gain some new allies.

Snippet:

They had reached their friends in the courtyard by then, where Lace was indeed coaxing a flame from a bundle of branches placed between a few benches. To their credit, Taash simply stared at them for a moment — or rather, at Lucanis specifically. The menacing effect of his cursed form might have been slightly diminished by the fact that Rook was still holding his hand in a firm grip, and it was rather difficult to be afraid of someone being led by the hand by a petite elven girl wearing a sunny smile. Lace's friendly wave might have helped, too. "Huh. I kinda thought you were just making that up." "Why does everybody think I'm lying about being cursed?" A certain measure of exasperation had crept into Lucanis' voice. "Dunno," Taash shrugged. "I guess we just don't deal much with curses over here. Or at least not the magical variety." Their grin showed surprisingly sharp teeth. "What variety of curses do you usually deal with?" Rook wanted to know as she found a seat and tugged Lucanis down beside her. She did let go of his hand then, trusting him not to run off once he was seated.

"My mum's a midwife. Or working as one, anyway. Pregnant women do a lot of cursing." "Huh. She didn't strike me as the most … uhm … affable person. No offense." "None taken. She's not. Funny enough, that's why the local midwife first asked her for help - they apparently had some issues with patients refusing treatment or husbands refusing to let them work, and having a big scary woman with horns give you orders apparently makes people much less likely to talk back." "I can see how that might work."

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Last Line Tag Game

Was kindly tagged by @serensama, so you all get the point where I'm pondering how to end the section and move the chapter forward XD

It takes an hour until everything has found its way into the pot and is set to simmer, but at the end of that hour, he has managed to shake off most of his nerves.

Gently tagging @dreamywritingdragon and @dell-amor-te and @vorchagirl <3

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Sneak peak of the cover I made for the modern AU ^___^

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WIP Game

Got tagged by @mustardprecum, so you get yet another snippet of that modern AU I'm tinkering with (I cranked out 4 chapters last week, plus another one for the fairytale AU ^^°)

The Waffles are decidedly cold by the time Lucanis makes it to room 312, because he had to make a little detour. He feels partially responsible for Rook's illness, so it's only fair if he tries to do something about it. She had mentioned that meals in her shared apartment could be a little dicey, and that she wasn't much of a cook herself, so a pot of good chicken soup should do nicely. And if you go to the trouble of making fresh soup, you may as well do it properly and make enough for everyone. He's lucky the grocery store two blocks down is even open on Sundays. Only now it feels weird to stand in front of her door with an umbrella, a handful of waffles and a bag of soup ingredients. What is he even supposed to say? 'Hi, I wanted to return your umbrella and I thought I could make you soup since you're sick?'

Too tired to tag, just jump in if you have something to share ;)

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New chapter is up! (didn't get around to it earlier ^^°)

In which the gang meets some new friends.

Snippet:

Lucanis slunk along behind them, trying hard to ignore the voice at the back of his head. MINE, it hissed along his spine, and had he been wearing his feathered coat, he was certain it would have puffed up his plumage. But then it was joined by another voice, snidely sneaking around his throat. See? She just likes to flirt; you're not special. And he wasn't sure which one was worse.

So he stepped up during a lull in their conversation, fitting himself inside the gap between them. "So, Davrin — how did you come by your feathered friend?" The errant knight raised a brow at him. "I liberated him from a small roadside circus. You know the kind — plenty of different animals in tiny cages, some poor fool making tricks and juggling everything you throw at him, and a creepy old lady watching over it all. Anyway, when I opened his cage, he decided to stick around instead of flying off." Lucanis frowned. "Was he the only illegal attraction there?" "Oh no, it was a whole operation. They had the usual glamoured animals, of course — an old lion made to look like a manticore, a spider seeming to spin the future in her web, a white horse with a fake horn — and I'll never understand the last one, because every child knows that unicorns look more like deer than horses. But they had some true fables there as well, like Assan here, and a feathered snake, and a really pissed off harpy. So I went to get the nearest constable, but this was close to a pretty small town, so there wasn't a lot of city guard around to help. The constable in charge asked me to assist. Went back, took the ringleader into custody, and then we had to find a specialist to take care of the fables, because you do not want a pissed of harpy running amok anywhere near your population. It was a whole thing, and more paperwork than I'd like to see for the rest of my life."

The snort slipping past Lucanis' throat was perhaps not the most dignified reaction as befitting royalty, but it was genuinely amused, and that was better than petty jealousy. "The responsibilities of a knight not shaping up to what you'd thought they'd be?" "I'll admit I did think there'd be more beating up bandits than filing reports. What would you know about that?" "I completed the same training you did." "Uh-huh. I don't see a shield though; did you quit or did you fail your final test?" Lucanis stiffened, drawing back his shoulders. "The latter. In a manner of speaking. I defeated something I took for a dragon, but once I struck the killing blow, it turned into a sorceress. I've been dealing with the consequences of that ever since." "Huh. That … sounds unfortunate." "You have no idea."