gargoyleofgotham

[gargoyleofgotham]

Guess that's what happens when you suck at lying and are partnered with a detective

[gargoyleofgotham]

Skibidi die.

[gargoyleofgotham]

So mad at how long this took

[gargoyleofgotham]

cryptid caught on film 🎥 🦇

[gargoyleofgotham]

Saw my first cyber truck irl and pointed and laughed when I passed and she was FURIOUS frowning with her entire face shaking her head holy shit I feel like I just did a line

[gargoyleofgotham]

Alfred Pennyworth deserves to be a cryptid. So here, have this. He's a creature inspired by a gargoyle and a valkyrie BTW, but has a human form

Tw: mentions of death, mentions of Alfred x Thomas an Martha Wayne, kind of internalized ableism (he doesn't want Bruce to be seen as "other" and so wishes Bruce didn't have non-normal traits)

He knew as soon as he met the child that they were as much his as they were Thomas and Martha's.

While the two elder Wayne's looked at him holding the little thing for first time with caring and loving smiles, he was already thinking of ways to explain everything away. Slightly pointed ears- a birth defect, cartilage was flexible and easy to mold. An ever so slightly upturned nose, one neither of the parents had- another slight defect, again explainable as some molding of cartilage.

It persisted, of course. An average body temperature just above the human normal, but luckily not far enough that anyone considered it worth looking into. A duller skin tone than the parents, looking colder and less full of life. Canine teeth that were ever so slightly longer and more pointed. He'd blame it on the city's chemicals and pollution affecting children's development. Martha and Thomas told him they were glad their son had features like him too. He smiled and didn't admit he thought that might lead to problems in the future. How would other children react? Would the boy be teased?

When the elder Waynes died, he spent the night mourning. Not just for his lovers and friends, but for the possibility of a normal life for the child, who would almost certainly grow up even more like him if he was the only parent around. He could be as human as he wanted, as he could be, but the kid would almost certainly pick up on unconscious habits that weren't suitable, weren't human.

When Bruce disappeared, leaving nothing but a note, he smiled, even as burning tears fell down his cheeks and his mind filled with thoughts of possibilites. Rich people did this kind of thing, wandered off randomly without notice. Maybe the boy was more normal than he thought. He'd come back and tell Alfred he'd been searching for himself, show off some tan that covered his dull skin and some filed-down canines, proudly flaunt a new nose that was more conventionally attractive and rounded ears.

Instead, Bruce returned with martial arts skills, honed senses, and determination to fix the city as directly as he could. None of his "irregularities" were gone. In fact, sometimes they seemed more prevalent than ever, though Bruce never seemed to realize.

That didn't change anything. Alfred was there, always there for him. He always would.

Btw if anyone wants to rp with this au pls lemme know

[gargoyleofgotham]

Jason: yo fudgefu— Bruce: really, Jason? Alfred: *walking by* please afford your father some respect, Master Jason Jason: Jason: greetings, Dad (derogatory) Alfred: Bruce: Jason: Bruce: how did you even—what—did you just say “parenthesis” out loud????? Jason: wouldn’t you like to know, Dad (derogatory)

[gargoyleofgotham]

Imagines: Batman x Social Media handler! reader Note: I'm making a series soon I'm just making sure the plot is right.

Being the Batfam’s public and private social media handler is the weirdest job that you’ve ever handled in your life. You were a vigilante forced to stop being one after dealing with life-threatening injuries and now you’re handling half of Barbara’s job. Honestly you don’t have complaints. The pay is good, the benefits are good, the bonuses are top tier, and Alfred makes snacks whenever you’re in the mansion for work. 

Monday at 3:00 a.m., you’re at the Batcave next to Tim who is nursing his third cup of coffee. He’s reading cases and cross examining evidence while you’re on your own computer watching thirst edits and making sure none of the angles are too close to their faces that can compromise their identities. From time to time Tim would peek on your computer to make a weird face or just straight up comment about he’s not caffeinated enough to watch 30 more minutes of Robin edits. You both agree that Dick deliberately poses  after every landing or every after fight for the edits. Also Nightwing’s butt has its own hashtag.  

Tuesday you’re sitting with the Batkids at the Wayne manor common room as you read aloud the thirst posts and DMs their accounts had received, it had become a little tradition. Damian thinks it’s repulsive but he stayed to watch the horror filled expressions. To his own horror however, he learnt that the ones who received the most thirst posts and DMs are Jason and Bruce. Apparently a lot of people like Red Hood’s ruggedness and no nonsense approach and a lot of people are attracted to masked men. 

Wednesday you’re in the cave with Stephanie and Duke with the weekly meme watching compilation (the purpose is to make sure that they don’t accidentally say something in public that can be hinting their identities. If they did, you’ll have to send the vid to Barbara to have it scrubbed off the internet) . It has also become a tradition that Alfred now makes a lot of popcorn whenever Wednesday rolls. Scrolling on the Gotham video media, when you search the terms ‘Batman’, ‘Robin’, or anything hero related, you will first be greeted by the headlines or recent news. Scrolling on next pages, you’ll be greeted by meme compilations. Stephanie really likes the ‘Batman being a tired dad: A compilation’. It currently has around 100+ videos on it. Duke finds it really fun to watch ‘Red Hood and Robin bickers while Signal patrols in the background for 30 minutes’. 

Thursday is relatively slower than other days. You sat at your normal desk job at Wayne Enterprise as the social media manager. Luke Fox would sometimes pass by your desk to pass some secret documents to be sent to the cave but most of the time you just spent your hours sitting in front of the computer while listening to the ‘10 hours of Gotham rain occasionally broken by Nightwing slipping on my house’s roof’. At lunch break, Dick would swing by to get the names of the crazy fans from the DMs to make sure they don’t do anything crazy (ps he’s always annoyed because his request from Barbara to have that 10 hour asmr video removed is always denied). 

Friday you’re sitting on the Wayne gardens munching on the snacks Alfred made while Cassandra sits next to you. Tomorrow’s your day off and now you’re just making a weekly report. Cassandra poked you as the Wayne men came barreling out of the backdoor for the weekly competition of who gathered the most edits/fanfics/fanarts this week. To their surprise, this time there were no competitions. They were instead greeted by Bruce who lectured them about fighting while on patrol (also Stephanie won this week)

masterlist

[gargoyleofgotham]

Little doll

The opposite of a neglected reader fic where the Batfam are consistently trying to get to know you (after “accidentally” doing some kidnapping. It’s started by a miscommunication because they’re all simultaneously geniuses and stupid, and then the reader goes along with it because they’re silly) and you keep trying to shove them off and leave after getting bored. -no gender mentioned for reader, no use of y/n

-Tw: brief mentions of creeps, reader feels like they’re being watched

You probably should have thought a bit more before going anywhere with Asher. He was stupid and impulsive (at least you two had that in common,) and with his memory problems, probably wouldn’t even remember to pick you up. For all you knew, he might not remember dropping you off at the library anyways, and it could be a few hours until someone else managed to come find you. You clutch your doll closer and steel your gaze on your book, even if your gaze flickers up every time someone walked by. 

After an hour or so, you’re sick of it. Normally, you could stay in a library for plenty of time, reading books or looking at pictures depending on your mood, but right now you’re a bit too preoccupied for that. So you decide to at least preoccupy yourself with something useful. If you walk around enough, you should be able to find a store your father has some hold in and find someone with his number who you can get to call him.

As you walk down the streets, you start to get a feeling you’re being watched. You don’t like that in general, but feeling that that in the streets of a city like this? That’s even worse.

As the prickling up your spine gets deeper, you go with your first idea and try to assimilate yourself into the group of people standing in front of the next shop. You slide in to stand next to two boys with dark hair and act like they’re relevant to you until the feeling eventually subsides. You were so focused on the creeping dread that you didn’t even notice the gaggle of people had noticed you come into their little group until one of them spoke. “Hello?”

You wave politely and mumble under your breath about just trying to hide from creeps, and go to leave, before one puts a hand on your shoulder. Your heart stops a beat.

“Yea? Do you need help finding your parents?” The oldest one in the group- you assume they’re all a family, and based on age, this is probably the father- asks. He seems well-meaning, but you don’t know if that’s enough right now.

Technically, you do need help finding your parents, but you don’t think you want random strangers helping with that. Maybe it’s just because it’s reliable, but you feel like you have a better chance finding a store your father owns. “Uh… no thanks.”

A few of the people look between each other; they don’t even try to hide it. Two or three of them speak at once, blurting out questions like “are you an orphan?” and “why, are they bad to you?”

Technically, you are also an orphan. You can’t really see what that has to do with anything, so you hesitantly reply “yes? To the… orphan question.”

Most of the group look at each other and nod. Ominous. “Well, you’re getting adopted now. No question about it.” One tuts, while another rolls their eyes. Someone sighs while another mumbles about letting people know, and a few other people say things you can’t hear over everyone else.

This is moving pretty fast, and you could stop it all with a few words, but you, for now, decide to keep your mouth shut about how just because you’re an orphan doesn’t mean you don’t have caretakers. This is getting interesting, and even if not biologically, you’re your father’s child; you can’t help but want to cause a little mischief and see what happens.

Please feel free to comment, I really like when people interact with me, I promise I don’t bite

Also, this is my first fanfic, and I’m aware I have a very robotic writing style sometimes (probably due to all of the essays I have to write) so if you feel like anything could be said better, please let me know, as well as any tips you may have

[gargoyleofgotham]

if you were at your worst, if you’re a villain or a screwup or whatever, there is a goth man dressed as a giant bat who keeps coming after you, bothering you. he sabotages your journey of self destruction over and over. ur ready to give up but he won’t let you. you think, today he won’t come. today he will give up on me too. he never does.

[gargoyleofgotham]

As Bruce grows older into his 50's or 60's the paparazzi and people crowding him becomes less and he thinks that people have finally decided that Bruce is too old to be attractive or mainstream and he's actually super fine with it and makes jokes( more like sarcastic remarks) about it. But in reality they've grown more freaky cause instead of looking wrinkly and a sappy old man the level of cunt he serves grows everyday,he doesn't look like a snack he looks like a buffet, 13 year olds are using his pics as the cover pages of their mafia wattpad stories, he looks majestic, absolute dilf, we don't talk about the amount of tags he's birthed just by ageing on ao3, and hes still an absolute UNIT, the reason he's not heard about it yet cause the batkids are blocking the shit OUT with all of their will and strength cause it doesn't matter if all of them are full grown adults they're still all like-THATSMYDADGETAWAYFROMHIMHEDOESN'THAVETIMEFORYOUHESBUSYBEINGOURDAD

[gargoyleofgotham]

…yeah to be honest i think i destroyed with this one

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he didn’t get the hint

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I know there are a lot of fanfics about Jason being caught by the Justice League and usually getting bailed out by the batfam, but imagine if it was Brucie Wayne bailing him out:

In the JL interrogation room:

Superman: Alright, Red Hood, who is your supplier helping you move drugs in Star City?

Red Hood, who was undercover investigating a drug ring and got caught in a JL bust and sesnses an opportunity to mess with Batman: Look, I know you guys aren't cops, but can I get at least get one phone call?

Justice league looking skeptical?

Red Hood: You can even monitor it.

Green Arrow: Fine one phone call, but it will be monitored.

Hands Hood a phone

Red Hood: Hey Dad, I got stopped by the Justice League. Could you come bail me out? Really, okay, see you soon. Okay, my Dad said that he would bail me, so could we go over to the teleporters?

Green Arrow: Okay, firstly, we aren't cops, you can't just post bail and get out. Secondly, how would this "Dad" get up here?

Red Hood: You'll see.

Minutes later, Brucie Wayne walks in with a trail of Heroes, trying to explain why he cannot be at the Watchtower.

Superman: Mr. Wayne what are you doing here and how did you get here?

Bruce laying the Brucie persona on thick: Well as one of the Justice League's biggest doners and tech suppliers I have access to the teleporters, as for why I'm here it's to bail out my son. Hi Jaylad!

Red Hood fully expecting Batman: What?

Green Arrow remembering his friend's grief over loosing Jason: Ummmm, Mr. Wayne this is the Red Hood. You know "Bag full of severed heads" Red Hood.

Brucie: Yes, I know he's had some issues with his big feelings, but he's still my sweet little boy.

Superman: And you think that he's your late son Jason Todd?

Brucie: Yes, Batman even confirmed it was him. It turns out that after he died, he was brought back by an organization that planned on using him as a weapon against Batman. But he left them and has been working to improve Crime Alley, I'm so proud of him.

Green Arrow: We caught him in Star City with Drug runners.

Brucie: I'm sure he has a good explanation, don’t you Jaylad?

Red Hood still reeling from Bruce showing up as Brucie and not Batman: I was undercover?

Brucie: See perfectly reasonable, now can I please have my baby boy back? Alfred will be so upset if he's not home for dinner.

Surprisingly, this works , the Justice League is to stunned by this revelation and later confirm this with Batman that yes, the notorious Red Hood is the son of Billionaire, philanthropist airhead Brucie Wayne. Jason, meanwhile, has suffered a huge blow to his cred in the Hero community because of the association with Brucie instead of the Batfam. The bat siblings do not let this go anytime soon.

[gargoyleofgotham]

i am unironically obsessed with adam west batman not only trying to be a good dad to robin, but actually succeeding. also love robin's insane energy levels and his ability to go from seething bloodlust to manic glee in record time. i think any superman worth his S would fit right into the family ^_^

[gargoyleofgotham]

youtube content in the dc universe

sequel

[gargoyleofgotham]

the people wanted more youtube worldbuilding ^^

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