goatunderthebridge

[goatunderthebridge]

A drabble about a good-luck kiss.

(Or is it?)

-------

To be fair, Tendou had started the routine off fairly innocently. It wasn’t his fault that he had been painfully bored on the coach rides to their matches, having been told he wasn’t allowed to leave his assigned seat after having teased Semi one too many times and promptly learning why bears weren’t meant to be poked (Semi had bitten his poking hand).

It also wasn’t his fault that Ushijima, who always sat next to Tendou, became the next victim to be annoyed. As Tendou had declared many times, it was his right to annoy his boyfriend endlessly, asking if he’d rather eat a worm sandwich or become one and be eaten by someone else.

(At that question, Ushijima’s face had gradually scrunched up as if he’d eaten a lemon and wouldn’t spit it out. Tendou tried to tell him to forget the hypothetical, but Ushijima couldn’t. At least, not for a few weeks, when he sat down for lunch beside Tendou and plainly announced, without context, “I would rather become a worm sandwich.”, notebook full of philosophical scribbles in hand as evidence, as Tendou had later surmised with more prompting.)

But - and this was the biggest one - it might’ve been slightly his fault for starting the good-luck ritual with Ushijima before matches. Just the teensiest-tiniest-barely noticeable markings of his fault. He’d been bored, he’d been restless, and his boyfriend had an extremely kissable face but refused to ease even an ounce of Tendou’s boredom.

And, well, voila! With bright eyes and clasped, pleading hands, Tendou began their good-luck kiss before matches to ensure the team’s success. Which turned into good-luck makeout sessions. And then, well, Tendou hadn’t thought about what might happen if they didn’t get to kiss before their matches; it was just a way to pass the time and, god, Ushijima always looked stunning - as if he would ever deny himself the chance to adore him.

But what would you know? Turns out, Ushijima believes in luck. So, one day, when Tendou is unexpectedly sick and can’t play in a match, being left behind at Shiratorizawa, Ushijima freaks out. He's completely inconsolable (i.e., he won't move from the bus and go inside to the tournament, no matter what Leon bribes him with). It's routine, it has to happen, it is as simple as that.

And so, with love for his boyfriend (alongside a sore throat and a banging headache), in sickness and in health, Tendou makes his way to the match to plant the biggest smooch of his life on his panicking boyfriend.

So, to be fair to Tendou, it wasn’t all his fault. Now, it was both of theirs - because he spreads his sickness to Ushijima, who becomes sick and still refuses to let Tendou leave for the next match he has to miss without a kiss beforehand.

And so, the horrors persist.

[goatunderthebridge]

[goatunderthebridge]

Impulsively wrote this middle school friendship AU intro for Ushiten. It would follow a week of them working on a school project together and probably be mostly canon compliant with the change of them meeting in middle school. Theyd play volleyball eventually and maybe Id extend it long enough to see the high school days its unclear. It would include both artist Ushijima and mega anime nerd Tendou and also tw for suicidal thoughts and feelings but no attempts just two deeply, deeply depressed 13 year olds finally meeting someone who gets them. Also Ushijima would have a stammer and an amount of autism that might be lethal before he had any decent self regulation. It would be the return of Adopted Tendou and probably a few other things. Anyway why am I telling you this? Because I have a habit of impulse writing the first 1000 words of something and then forgetting about it so instead I've given it to you. So like. Maybe all this will be nothing idk.

---

It was 9:08 on a Thursday morning when Tendou Satori decided to kill himself.

And then at 11:13 that very same Thursday morning, he’s forced to delay his decision due to a school assigned group project.

Now, normally Tendou would not be so altruistic as to care about whether or not he pulled his weight in a group project or left people hanging. No, the reason why this is an imposition at all is because of how he ends up assigned to a group project. He’s not paired up with the girl he sits beside as she rolls her eyes, they don’t draw straws or count numbers. No, they’re told that everyone can pick a partner to work with for this particular assignment, and then they have to make and colour project board on - you guessed it - a type of animal to then present to the class on.

Tendou, at first, is actually thrilled with this. He simply won’t partner up, and then he’ll be dead, and it will be okay. But when the class is wrapping up and everyone is getting ready for lunch, the teacher is suddenly whistling for him and waving him over like a scheming villain.

He’s not even sure he’s the one she wants at first. He frowns, glancing around and watching the other kids file out of the class, and then looking back to her. She waves him over again.

Her name is Kobayashi, and she’s… fine. Middle school biology is generally just fine.

He stands in front of her, wondering if he’s done something wrong.

“Hey, Satori,” she says, like she’s about to ask for all his gold. “I have a… huge favour to ask you. You don’t have a partner in mind for the animal project, do you?”

He shakes his head.

“Great, good, okay. So… do you think you could do me the favour of asking Wakatoshi to be your partner?”

Tendou frowns, glancing behind him to where the other kid usually sat, but he had already left the class.

“Uh… why?”

She seems to hesitate on this answer for a second, before eventually saying: “Well, it’s just that… you know he doesn’t really talk much, and has a really hard time making friends. And usually I help out by introducing him to someone, but I think he’s begun to notice that nobody ever approaches him on their own, and…”

Tendou stares at her for a moment, then glances behind him and scans over the occupied seats in the class to identify and even number of students. So an even amount of pairs.

We’re probably leftovers, he decides. There’s probably something wrong with this kid the way there’s something wrong with him, and she wanted them stuck together to avoid contaminating the other kids.

“Okay,” he says, because what does it matter to him?

“Oh, you’re the best, thank you,” Kobayashi says, clasping her hands together for a moment before adding: “Okay, I won’t take any more of your time. Go enjoy your lunch.”

Tendou nods slightly, and figures he should probably go find this kid to set up their collaboration. And it’s about then, (11:13) that he realizes if he asks to partner with someone, and then kills himself, that would be super inconsiderate and lame. So he decides he’ll wait until after they present.

But he heads down to the school cafeteria and starts scanning the available seats. It’s interesting that there’s apparently another social loser like him in his very class, and he’d never noticed. He’s fairly certain he can recognize the kid by face, but it still takes him a moment of intensely scanning before he notices him. He’s not exactly sitting alone, which is what surprises him. It looks like the kid is surrounded by friends.

Except for that, as Tendou approaches, he realizes that while he’s sandwiched in between two very loud groups of friends, he’s not actually engaging in either circle, and is instead sitting with his head down, peeling an orange so carefully he’s kept the peel all in one piece.

Tendou has to fight through crowds, then, to get to the other side and worm into the seat across from him and between those two groups. He doesn’t look up.

Tendou clears his throat.

He still doesn’t look up.

So he reached forward, knocking his knuckles against the table to get his attention. This makes him jump, and he looks up in alarm, as if shocked someone had snuck up on him despite being locked in on that orange like it owed him a life debt.

Tendou immediately regrets the rude way of getting his attention, realizing he probably seemed like an asshole, and withdrew his hand quickly to sit on it.

“Uh, hey,” he says. “Ushijima, right?”

He gets a single nod back. Well, Kobayashi had said he was quiet. Tendou wasn’t sure he’d ever heard him speak, actually.

“Well, I’m Tendou - we’re in class together-”

Ushijima is nodding, indicating he does recognize him.

“-uh, and we’ve got that stupid animal project coming up, and I don’t have a partner yet, so I was wondering if you wanted to, like, I dunno, do that together or whatever.”

Ushijima looks at him for long enough that Tendou is beginning to get concerned that he didn’t actually speak any Japanese, and then eventually the blank look turns to a frown.

What, did I offend him? Why is he looking at me like that?

“I mean, unless you already have a partner,” Tendou starts. Ushijima continues to stare at him. “Do… uh… sorry… What's happening? You can say no, dude, that’s fine, I just-”

After a second, Ushijima glances around, as if psyching himself up, before lean towards Tendou and very carefully saying:

“Okay.”

Tendou leans towards him at the same time. “Okay as in… partners?”

Ushijima nods, and then looks back down to his orange. Tendou is fairly certain that that’s the end of the conversation and this project is going to be the most boring partnership on the planet when Ushijima splits the orange in half, and offers half over to him.

“What? Why?” Tendou says, not quite able to stop his tone from coming out distrustfully.

Ushijima doesn’t seem to notice, and instead answers the question:

“You do not have lunch with you.”

It’s not a question of ‘are you hungry’ or ‘did you eat’ or ‘would you like half of this orange I’m holding,’ but rather Ushijima has now decided that since Tendou does not have any, he was going to put food in front of him.

Tendou feels a very heavy, hard beat in his heart, and reaches forward to take the orange.

“Oh. Thanks.”

[goatunderthebridge]

Their interactions always fill me with excitement.

Ushijima usually doesn’t show much emotion, but when he’s with Tendou, even the smallest expressions seem full of meaning.

It also feels like he talks more when he’s around Tendou, and I love seeing that.

[goatunderthebridge]

i think i dreamt this...? Yes. This was definitely in a dream I had and it made me laugh so hard during the dream that it changed me.

Ushijima, in his light squabbles with Oikawa (and Iwaizumi inevitably coming to break them up at times), recognising that they act similarly to him and Tendou. The familiarity, the quasi-dependency, the reading of each other's minds. This plants a seed in his mind, nourished and nurtured as he watches them intently, observing the way they back each other up both on and off the court; a duo inherently separate from the rest. This confirms it, he thinks. He'll say something.

The next time he sees Oikawa drinking from a fountain in a relatively abandoned hallway at one of their tournaments, he walks straight towards him (ignoring the way Oikawa's eyes widen and dart around when he notices Ushijima).

Oikawa is quick to wipe his mouth and hold up his hands, defensive, as he continues glancing around him. "Whoa, hey, slow down."

Ushijima, noting his quick pace, complies by stopping a finger breadth away from him. Oikawa steps backward, eyes narrowed. If he were a dog, his hackles would be raised, Ushijima notes amusedly. Perhaps he would share that.

"I have something to tell you," Ushijima begins, but is cut off by the sounds of loud footsteps instantly heading towards them.

Both of their heads turn to see an angry Iwaizumi stomping their way. Oikawa sighs "thank God" - in something like relief? - and Ushijima nods, agreeing. It'll be easier to tell them both, here and now.

"Oi, what the hell are you doing? We're gonna miss the bus," Iwaizumi says as he glances between them, a hard stare given to Ushijima and something like comfort given to Oikawa. Ushijima's lip twitches slightly - he knew that look. Tendou had given it to him too many times to count.

"God forbid I get thirsty," Oikawa exclaims mockingly, but despite his tone, he tugs Iwaizumi closer by the arm and drops his voice to a whisper, "He wants to tell me something."

Iwaizumi blinks. Then, he looks up at Ushijima, curious.

"What?"

Ushijima steadies himself, ready for his spiel. "Well. This is for both of you. I have noticed several traits in your behaviour that I recognise in myself and a member of my team, Tendou Satori. I realised that I should tell you in case you did not know. Support is necessary, I find."

The duo exchange looks, a variety that Ushijima cannot decipher. But he easily heard Iwaizumi mutter "Tendou Satori...?" and Oikawa whisper back "You know, the Guess Monster.". As ever, the name irks Ushijima, his face hardening. This goes unnoticed by the duo, as something like recognition and understanding dawns on them. They look at each other, Oikawa still grasping Iwaizumi's arm. Now, he squeezes him lightly, as if to comfort him. That softens Ushijima - he recognises that, too.

Oikawa looks from Iwaizumi to Ushijima in the extended silence, replying, "So, what? What have you possibly noticed from us that you felt the need to tell us?"

"That you are different from the others," Ushijima says, matter-of-factly, "You have a bond the others do not have."

They share another look. Iwaizumi sighs, scratching the back of his neck whilst Oikawa's face hardens as he stares back at Ushijima. Ushijima does not understand that.

"Yeah? So what? What does that have to do with you?"

Ushijima does not understand why he's getting more defensive - he wants to tell him they're the same. That he understands. So he does.

"This bond is something I share with Tendou," Ushijima says. He means to continue, to say that it helped him figure out who he was and take up space more comfortably at Shiratorizawa - eventually seguing into how Oikawa should've come there because of this - but he's stopped by Oikawa letting out a short laugh.

This suprises Ushijima, who looks to Iwaizumi for an answer. He, too, is not reliable in answering his look of confusion as he pats Oikawa on the back, shaking his head gently at Ushijima.

"What?" Ushijima asks, desperate to understand and simultaneously aware of the empty space next to him, a missing voice that would whisper what these actions meant.

It's Iwaizumi who replies as Oikawa continues to laugh. He says, "We kinda knew that."

Ushijima blinks. Then, he nods, understanding. Of course, they'd recognise the traits in him, too! That's how it works. "I see."

Oikawa slows his laughing, sputtering out, "You really had to corner us to tell us that we - we're-"

"Autistic, yes."

"Dating!" Oikawa freezes, the laughter dying. He stares at Ushijima, his and Iwaizumi's face both crinkling in confusion. "Wait, what?"

Ushijima blinks. Oikawa's words take a little longer to process in his mind, sending a wrench into the workings of his mind. Dating. Dating.

"That you are both autistic," Ushijima repeats slowly, staring between the two of them as fear uncoils in his chest at the realisation that he has grossly, grossly, misunderstood their dynamic. It wasn't like he and Tendou, not at all. And yet, everything was the same?

The trio blink at each other in stunned silence. Ushijima hopes Tendou never finds out about his latest social fuck-up.

[goatunderthebridge]

watercolor

[goatunderthebridge]

eating your stz headcanons for breakfast btw do you have any for goshiki

hehe thank you!! I love Goshiki so here's some for our best boy:

Goshiki thoroughly believes that he's in some desperate, forbidden love story with Koganegawa. No matter how many times Kogane tells him they don't have to sneak around or hide on their dates lest they run into someone they know, Goshiki is adamant that it's forbidden for them to date across teams and absolutely no one can know. The thing is: both teams know. They've been knew. Neither of them are as subtle as they think they are. And nobody cares. One time, Tendou asks how his boyfriend is and Goshiki splutters and coughs and just. runs away. Tendou just thinks it's because he's too shy to go on a double date with him and Ushijima yet.

Goshiki can't stand bugs. He gets very tense and refuses to move if he sees one, especially if one unexpectedly crawls onto him.

When he can't sleep at night or he gets homesick, he listens to voice recordings from his friends and family. He'll swear up and down that he doesn't care about the recordings to the challenge of no one, but he loves them.

I kinda see him as neurotypical whilst Ushijima is neurodivergent (not set in stone for either! although autistic Ushijima is very much canon in my heart), and I think that makes for some very funny interactions when he copies things Ushijima does without really questioning how it might appear to others, thereby deviating from the 'normal' way of doing things. e.g., he saw Ushijima tie his shoes in a way that appeared super cool and absolutely must be essential to being a successful ace but. it's just Ushijima tying his shoes the same way he learned when he was a kid and Never strayed from. or Goshiki purposefully shaking his body like a dog before matches to get rid of nervous energy, copied from an Ushijima who gets so excited before matches that he physically can't contain it and it'll come out in little, short body-shakes without realising.

Goshiki loves doodling. He'll concentrate during class fastidiously but sometimes, particularly when doing homework, he'll keep a spare piece of paper close to him to doodle on. He is very good at drawing little flowers and animals. He tries to hide this until the others see it's comforting for him and regularly give him spare paper and pens to doodle with or offer their hands/arms/skin without needing to be asked. Shirabu likes his forearms done, Taichi his hands, Ushijima doesn't mind a finger done, Leon his hands/arms, Yamagata his neck, Semi expresses he's too cool for doodles and they will ruin his 'image' (yet you will still see him sport little flowers and dogs on his arms), and Tendou will practically strip to have any place done. The weirdest Goshiki did for him (and refused to do again despite Tendou's complaining) was a meadow across his stomach.

He had a pet dog growing up and he misses it so badly whilst at school. It tops his list of things to do the minute he has a spare moment, foregoing video calls with Kogane in favour of his dog (Kogane knows his place and has long since accepted it).

[goatunderthebridge]

"If nobody in the world loved you, do you think you'd still be okay?"

"I'm sorry, I don't think I understand the question."

The clock ticks slowly, a soft noise that feels like it drags behind time, just a fraction of a fraction slower than the actual count of a second. Tendou tips his head back, looking up at Ushijima from where he rested in his lap. The world has slowed down, and the sky outside could be the deep indigo of night, it could be the brilliant blue of a cloudless summer's day, or it could be burning with the fire of a new morning. He's not sure, and he's not inclined to check.

"If nobody loved you, do you think you'd be okay?"

Ushijima thinks about the question, but something in it doesn't seem to fit in his head. So Tendou keeps talking, letting his own voice fill the air as it so often does.

"When I was little, I don't think anyone loved me. Of course, you say, things are better now. To wait it out, to fight for it. That if you make it long enough, you'll find your people. And that's true. At least, it was for me. But I still think it's a cruel trick, to make the children survive being unloved only for the adult to have it easy."

Ushijima lifts a hand up, to gently run his fingers through Tendou's hair, brushing soft strands back from his eyes. The light from the room, a warm yellow lamp and a cracked open window of moonlight or daylight or sunrise, casts shadows that feel ethereal - timeless.

"So I guess I just mean... Do you think you could do it, as an adult? Maybe we're all weaker than we were as children. Maybe we couldn't survive it. Looking back I don't know how I did it. How I found the strength to put one foot in front of another. I don't think I could do it, if I had to be alone again, and yet I did, for a decade, at six years old."

Ushijima hums softly, and somewhere outside a bird starts to sing, calling to its mate from the perch of an ancient old tree.

"Do you believe love is finite, then?"

Tendou frowns, focusing his eyes on him, as Ushijima slowly leans back to look up at the ceiling, as if seeing through it to the sky.

"I think I'd be okay," Ushijima says, eventually. "Because you love me now."

"Even if I left?"

"Would that stop you from loving me now?"

"I wouldn't be here to keep loving you."

"But you would have loved me. And love, I think, is timeless. The love you gift to me now is the same love I will hold when I am eighty."

Tendou smiles slightly. "Ah. I see."

"And for what it's worth, you were not unloved as a child. I love you."

"You weren't there."

"But I love you now, so I love you then. Love is... Different. Different from time, different from... Attention, different from togetherness. I love you now, and the universe knows that I loved you then. In the way I am made for you, you have always been made to be loved by me. And you were strong when you were six, because you are strong now. It is all the same."

The wind outside sends the branches of a tree waving, interrupting the stream of moonlight, or daylight or sunrise, dappling the world in brilliant dancing lights. Tendou smiles slightly, closing his eyes.

"So you believe in soulmates?"

"I believe in souls."

"Two halves of a whole?"

"Two souls, one love. One time, one universe."

"I think you're describing soulmates."

"I'm not trying to," Ushijima says, lifting his head up, to look around the quiet room, that for now exists as nothing in particular, but could be anything and everything when they needed it to be. A snapshot of a moment that didn't exist, and maybe never would again.

"What are you trying to say, then?"

"You will never be unloved."

[goatunderthebridge]

@anoant-haikyuu-dump In my head I can envision him being something strong but still silly like having an inherent minotaur-related or classic tiger-related appearance and associated abilities but in my heart? mouse. He can turn into a mouse and it pisses him off to no end. He's a hench mouse though, surprisingly.

daydreaming about fukutora with mythical abilities...

fukunaga being a shapeshifter and turning into whatever makes a bit the funniest, either making tora cackle or pissing him off further. imagine tora saying he's soooo hungry and fukunaga, turning to him with a serious expression on his quickly changed from human-to-horse face, replying "how hungry?" and tora bursting out in laughter, crying. imagine tora and fukunaga getting into an argument and tora exclaiming as he hides his face into his hands "it's like talking to a brick wall!". and then there's a brief silence. and before tora even looks back up, he groans out "istg if you're a brick wall when I look back up--" and wouldn't you know it, there's a new brick wall in their apartment.

anyway that's it, that's the post

[goatunderthebridge]

a little brother

It's silent for a moment and Tendou thinks he's lost him, a blank expression covering Ushijima's face. But then, he mumbles under his breath,

"I've never had a little brother before. It's nice."

It's small and painted with quiet contemplation that strikes Tendou's heart. His breath catches in his throat as Ushijima continues his basket, weaving as fastidiously as usual and as if he hadn't casually said something that could turn Goshiki's world upside down if he heard it.

Tendou smiles to himself, resting his chin on his hand as he watches Ushijima and sees, in the corner of his eyes, Goshiki as usual watching, too. He copies his movements, the tip of his tongue sticking out of his mouth as his eyebrows draw close together in careful concentration. A giggle bubbles up inside Tendou's throat.

Ushijima glances at him, head tilted slightly in question. Tendou anticipates his question and replies as easily as if he had said something,

"I think if you told him that, he'd spontaneously combust," Tendou jokes, the smile pulling wider at his lips.

Concern immediately crosses Ushijima's face and he sets his lips in a hard line, resolved within himself. "Then I will not tell him."

Tendou didn't know what he expected from him and a laugh bursts out of him, adding to the lively chatter in the room and drawing nobody's surprise as the boys continue their individual crafts.

---

This is a little snippet of a scene about Ushijima not understanding why Goshiki follows him around/watches him so closely until he asks Tendou why and Tendou replies he idolises Ushijima something like an older brother. This scene is Ushijima's response. And it's set against the team doing arts and crafts together because I said so.

This was also inspired by a Goshiki ask I got!! I swear, I've seen the asks I received, I'm just super slow in replying!!! I am soooo grateful for them though and replies WILL come soon, I prommy !!! Enjoy this for the meantime <333

[goatunderthebridge]

ushiten

[goatunderthebridge]

Shit quality but I live for the lols (also for belated birthday boy Tendou)

[goatunderthebridge]

Have been fighting for my life at work but here we go: some taichi kawanishi headcanons because the fucker crawled into my brain at some point and I can't get him to leave or pay rent

He's strangely good at copying sounds. Like a tap dripping or a bubble popping - he's got it covered. This makes for some absolutely great pranks whenever he can be bothered to instigate something

He keeps a scrapbook of plants. Nobody knows why. Goshiki asked him once and the next day found a sprig of thyme on his pillow. He didn't ask him about it again.

He has a contest with Tendou on how many hairs they can pull from the team. Tendou's winning only because he has unlimited access to Ushijima's hair, something Taichi says is unfair and Tendou just says he should get his own boyfriend then.

On that point, Tendou is hell-bent on playing matchmaker and setting Taichi up with someone. Taichi is largely unbothered by this and finds the many, many attempts funny, especially when it flusters whoever Tendou is pestering about a date (to which Ushijima at first, very concerned, asks if Tendou forgot they're in a relationship before Tendou explains)

He has an uncanny ability of winning boardgames or card games at the last second. He doesn't play very often but when he's pulled into it, he destroys the rest of them. Anyone on the verge of winning - often Shirabu - is filled with murderous intent when he usurps them

[goatunderthebridge]

the interview question was can you draw your spouse from memory? + bonus iwaizumi

[goatunderthebridge]

silly ushiten from my sketchbook <3 <3 yap yap yap

[goatunderthebridge]

Tendou finding out that Ushijima, like him, didn't have a stereotypical childhood full of friends and fun and funny antics, and so he makes them a bucket list of things to do together. They build a pillow fort, they have a pillow fight (inevitably wrecking the pillow fort), they stay up late chatting, they play childhood games (with Tendou letting Ushijima take as much time as he needs to to understand the rules of the game), and slowly, gradually, they figure out they're learning how to be safe together. and something starts to heal within both of them.

[goatunderthebridge]

autistic burnout SUCKS ASS!!!!!!!! my thoughts and love go to everyone struggling right now, I'm right here with you baby 💪 (me flexing to showcase our strength in persevering even though everything suuuuuucks massively)

but genuinely. I've just gotten out of a 30-minute foetal position on my bedroom floor because I spent approximately 50 minutes in the presence of friends I love and adore but can't help masking around, even whilst knowing I am severely burnt out. And it was hot. And it was loud. And something Unknown was touching me. Like, everything gets dialled up to 1000. So I get it. God do I get it.

Go and have a cry or scream or curl up into a ball until everything feels okay again. Go put on your headphones and listen to a playlist over and over again whilst scrolling pinterest looking at your fave blorbos until you feel better again. Open your windows, turn off the lights. Just know that I can see a tree from my window, and it tells me we're going to be alright.